I present a parody of Dolly Parton's Jolene: T'pring.
Notes: I dropped the "please" in the second line of the chorus to fit the syllable count, and Vulcan/tradition kind of works in my accent in a "not really a rhyme but it is if you sing it" way, although if it doesn't work for you, you can stick with the original line of "just because you can". It's also worth pointing out I am not a musician in any way, so *shrug* Feel free to record yourself singing it if you are (bonus points if you're dressed as Kirk) and please tag me in it if you do, because I'd love to see it. Enjoy!
T'pring T'pring T'pring T'pring
I'm begging of you, Don't take my Vulcan.
T'pring T'pring T'pring T'pring
Please don't take him, though it's tradition.
Your beauty is beyond compare,
With ornate locks of midnight hair,
With flawless skin, and blood of emerald green.
Your logic is impeccable,
He'll probably like that most of all,
And I cannot compete with you,
He's angry and he threw some Soup
His control's truly flown the coop,
And he intends to marry you,
I understand you are engaged,
Spock's in Plak Tow and he's enraged,
But there's got to be some other way,
T'pring T'pring T'pring T'pring
I'm begging of you, Don't take my Vulcan.
T'pring T'pring T'pring T'pring
Please don't take him, though it's tradition.
You'd be more content with Stonn,
And I'd be sad if Spock was gone.
If it's the only option left,
I'll fight, though I am out of breath.
Wait, what d'you mean, it's to the death?!?
T'pring T'pring T'pring T'pring
I'm begging of you, Don't take my Vulcan.
T'pring T'pring T'pring T'pring
Please don't take him, though it's tradition.