i think detrans as a kink is hotter when the person in question isn't being violently forced into it, but rather gently guided (manipulated) to who they're supposed to be by someone who cares about them (or at least acts like they care about them)
"do this for me, won't you?", "i just think you look nicer in these clothes", "you're much cuter as a girl/boy", "you can just be a masc girl/fem guy, you don't really need to transition", "you're so feminine/masculine"
it's the subtle humiliation of being shut down every time you try to be anything else, backing away from what you think you want to be and letting someone else be in charge of what you are, even if you think you don't like it
i personally keep getting discouraged from transitioning because people are always telling me im prettier as a girl, they're always calling me a girl, they're always bringing up my most feminine aspects/features. if everyone prefers me as a girl, why make the effort to transition and ruin my value~?
i just think it's hot when it's coming from a partner specifically.. like i have to fit the mold of what they want from me so they can get off. suddenly they have control over every way i present myself, and what i want doesn't really matter <3
