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#extradirty
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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@lovelornnn
Nothing Left to Salvage - @lovelornnn
Tormented by a Depressing Love Affair by @lovelornnn
PHANTOM THOUGHTS by @lovelornnn
i know there is nothing
to go back to.
the house by the lake
would have sank anyways;
it is something
only my youth can touch.
licking my tears,
my mind filling,
with images i do not need.
maybe this is a wake up call.
i drowned in that lake,
and still
emerged.
i never forgot how the air filled
my lungs.
it never hurt,
i just wanted to feel it all.
the house is sold and gone.
fifteen years later,
i hold my breath
under the water in the bathtub.
- the house i miss dearly
In my head,
I’m still nineteen years old,
and my mother is laughing at me
for admitting i want to kill myself.
Resentment builds after months and
years,
I would feel better if she died tomorrow,
or maybe right now.
I have buried myself below the floorboards
of our house,
so my mother can’t see my facial expressions when she tells me
that there is someone doing better
than me.
My reflection in the mirror
will always be vague,
my mother only sees herself.
I do not know who I am,
and she does not know
about the cuts on my thighs.
random thoughts // @lovelornnn
SPRING ….. @lovelornnn
the tunnel /// 04.20.23 @lovelornnn
WORDS OF WISDOM FROM SPRING @lovelornnn
losing a best friend is a different type of pain. i can’t even find the words.
@lovelornnn
@lovelornnn
All of this pain
should have buried me,
it didn’t.
I swallowed my words
with their sharp edges,
and cut my throat.
Rushes of crimson emotion
bleed through
my smile.
@lovelornnn