insomniac @luciferskitchen - Tumblr Blog

touchhorse-deactivated20250131

the best porn i ever watched was about these two argentinian monks in a monastery during WW3 who witness the end of the world and then have sex in this candlelit stone grotto while nukes rain down outside and it was really emotionally earnest and played super straight i loved it. and like not just because i have a fetish

touchhorse-deactivated20250131

both of the monks have eyebrow piercings

omtai

How do they choose which sand to be the glass and which sand to be the sand in an hourglass... Imagine you and your best friend were two grains of sand and you had to be in the hourglass and your bestie had to be the glass. Ur together but youve never been more apart. A Sick and twisted practice hourglassery is...

omtai

This was me off 1 chocolate croissant

thememedaddy

american-auror-story

lucy-moderatz

communist-hatsunemiku

"we're all going to be using and leaning into spatial computing" this is a telltale sign of rich techbro brainrot. "oh lets reinvent the kitchen timer but worse and connected to wifi" fucking idiot

communist-hatsunemiku

this is even worse cuz i just realized that you'd literally be wearing a $3500 vr headset while your fucking cooking. this shit would be stupid even if it cost $35

that-house

briefly forgot Death Note was a thing and was wondering why I'd need to spend $3500 to know if my pasta was transphobic

themysteriousmurasamecastle

my dad has this crazy ass huge camera lens so we went out during the eclipse last night and got maybe one of my favorite photos i’ve ever had a hand in taking

grulu

themysteriousmurasamecastle

you cant do that here

cryptotheism

hi yes hello what the fuck is metrosexual lmfao

It's hard to explain to zoomers just how insanely homophobic the early 2000s were. If you were male, and like, washed your hair regularly, people would call you a faggot.

So, dudes who washed their hair and wore button ups developed the term "metrosexual" which meant "I care about my appearance but I am attracted to women and don't have sex with men."

cryptotheism

And not just "oh people called you gay to be mean" like they literally thought you were homosexual and hiding it. Women would literally be like "damn, I was super attracted to him, but I heard he wore shorts more than twice in a week, so I guess he must like men."

cottoncandylesbo

you couldn't even wear a scarf. the scarf made you gay.

jackabbot

FRIENDS 3.05 • The One With Frank Jr.

phantom-threaded

FRIENDS 9.07

maimndevour

brucebocchi

whydidisavethistomyphone

Tactical reloading of things that don’t need tactical reloads

taraljc

I lost it at the toaster and couldn't make it past the smoke detector before reblogging

h0ped3lusion

This is so satisfying to watch—

francoanglo

letsmakepoppunkgreatagain

boomstab-papa

zeidmoon

The gamer / the chest

shane-actually

i love gamers with big, huge breasts

thesituation

“your rent should be a third of your income” well wouldn’t that be nice. wouldn’t it. lower the rent pussy

moniquill

Casual observation from someone old enough to remember: in the year 2000 financial advice was that rent should be no more than 1/4 of your income.

vergess

Until the mid 80s, the advice was that if you must rent instead of owning, then that 20% of your monthly income (oh yes, only 20%) should include all your utilities too.

After all, rent costs more than a mortgage, so it should offer more too.

The housing market is a fucking travesty.