This was all he could feel after he had returned to his estate from Icecrown. The Vanquisher's mind was still reeling - hours after Mourne pulled the shadows from his brain and his soul.
Though it's mark still remained.
Different from some Ebons, Lumeal's emotions were amplified after the Eye had taken his body for a joyride.
Lumeal had no qualms killing those who deserved it - those who fought against him: the scourge, the Legion, the Eye. Almost every morning he ventured out to find some rat to exterminate to make the worlds that much of a better place, but to make sure the bloodlust that coursed through ichor coated veins remained in check.
Still, to see four bodies on the cots receiving healing was enough to damage the man.
"It wasn't your fault." They kept repeating. "They used you."
Thankfully he'd killed no one, but Vythrien almost looked unrecognizable beneath a fractured and swollen face.
They told him it took three to stop him.
"Makes sense. He's one of us." Lin said, almost as though she was surprised he hadn't caused more damage.
Lumeal moved to his bed. It remained unused for the most part. He took his time undressing, all the while a single eye focused on the painting across the room. Icecrown. The battle of good against evil. His eyes focused on the lichfire eyes that scattered the painting. "One of them." He whispered.
"You think I ought to get used to it." He muttered to no one in particular.
It's been a hard adjustment, and while we've passed the year mark - there are things that I still cannot believe.
Lumeal sighed and laid on the red silk sheets of the round mattress. One leg outstretched and the other knee raised, foot planted down. He reached his fingers to gently rub where his leg had been fractured in multiple areas.
This used to be so painful, and now there's nothing at all... because I'm one of them.
I am power, and I'm damn near unstoppable. Pain that would have rocked me a year ago is but a mere annoyance... because I'm one of them.
I should be used to it - but to see the team like that... it's like learning all over again that I've become the Vanquisher.
I hope they'll forgive me.
Lumeal stopped rubbing his leg and turned on his side. No need for sleep, and all alone with his thoughts was going to prove to be a long night.
His eye focused on the painting one last time, before his own lichfire orb closed.
