I am in so much pain right now. I am having a hard time believing that my situation will ever improve, I’m terrified that I’ll never regain my health and my best years are already behind me. I feel like no one believes me when I try to explain the severity of this pain. I can literally wake my partner up asking to go to the hospital and get brushed off. My own parents think my condition is my own fault and that I’m not worthy of help. Maybe they’re right. I’m so beyond tired of being in other people’s way. I’m tired of being in my own way. I’m tired of my fucking lungs hurting. Breathing is like step one of being alive and I can’t even figure out how to do that right. I don’t even know why I’m posting on this long abandoned blog. Shouting into the void I guess.
