ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ɪ'ᴍ ᴡᴏʀᴛʜ ɪᴛ

luhan. '90liner. graphic designer/ illustrator ❝ I've passed my expiration date. If you look at the ingredients you'll find, You're allergic to me. ❞ ● ● ● ● ●

[lureal]

Now be happy that I spent my time longer than usual by sending you two lovely messages for you to smile for at least more than a couple of seconds. My shady little (quite liteally) emo hyung, I just want you to be happy, creepy and vulgar as usual. Your efforts have been mildly okay, but they're not your best. Smile for Hun or I'll have to leak your nudes in order to at least get some kind of reaction coming from you.

I think it’s time for me to broadcast this just to get a reaction out of you –quite a turn of events, huh? Everyone, gather around, I have an announcement to make. This guy right here, the very chic pal with the slickest haircut and clothing, the jerk at nature but kid at heart case on two feet: he is a sweetheart. Do not be fooled by his grouchy comments and snarky approach; do not bat an eyelid at his attempts to be this century’s diva because here’s this little secret about him. He actually cares for those he happens to consider ‘close’, he does awfully so yet he does not know how to express himself –blame the lack of humanity he has lingering in his stone cold body. Thus, here he is. He dropped by to ensure his lovely gē is alive and breathing instead of wallowing in his misery and self-pity at the solitary corners of his flat. Isn’t he a cutiepie? I will state this out and open without the usual pretense I enjoy putting forward in public around you: I love you and I appreciate you being my friend. Now get out of my face, drag queen in denial.

[lureal]

kxink replied to your post “{ text: lubutt } I hope you fancy a drink or two...eventually a bottle of good vodka or other liquor because you're meant to appear at my place tonight. At 7 PM. No excuses.”

{ text: lubutt } GROSS. May I change my mind once more?

{txt to: Jongass} You are not allowed to. Stuck with me tonight -don't you dare ditch me another time. It's becoming a bothersome habit of yours these days, ex-bff. 

[maidosama]

[lureal]

{ text: lubutt } I hope you fancy a drink or two...eventually a bottle of good vodka or other liquor because you're meant to appear at my place tonight. At 7 PM. No excuses.

{txt to: Jongass} Change of plans, no? My place, make it 8pm since I’d be busy dolling myself up for you with a pair of worn-out sweatpants and a gross tank top. Gotta look ‘pretty’ for my power bottom friend of mine after all ㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎㅎ

[lureal]

Since our schedules have been so shitty these days and is keeping us from seeing each other much at all, I actually got myself this to bring along wherever I go as a reminder of you:

I may or may not have drooled on it while sleeping with it already though… Anyway! I also wanted to give you this:

It makes a cute noise when you poke its stomach just how I’ll squirm and yelp if you ever poke mine—

Carry it everywhere you go okay!!

I just miss you so much, you idiot.

[lureal]

I actually thought of sending you a cute present. Pink dildos for my favorite hyung~. You're quite a fan of those devices, aren't you? Too bad everything I found was too graphic. Makes me sad.

“Your favourite?” the amateur designer echoes, the timbre of his voice doubtful as his brows soaring across the plane of his forehead to be yielded with a set of wrinkles. “Now I know my memory span is not the best but weren’t you the one dissing the proficiency and texture of dildos –by first hand experience, I suppose? Not judging or anything, the image is quite pleasing in my head although you have to excuse your hyung for not having much experience in that field. Thanks for the input about what you do in your spare time though, next time I’ll pay attention to send you my nudes so you have something more graphic in store to get off to."

[lureal]

"I heard you were asking for Mr. Right." He stands near the door, head peered inside with a small grin. "I'm here."

“These pick-up lines are becoming more severe for sure—,” pursing his thin-edged lips together to fix them into a barely patent line across his features, Luhan hangs his head down with his hand rushing to his aid by covering his face just as his mien contorts into an unflattering expression between retched chuckles. Blessed with plain-spoken friends, the Chinese male had been patted on the back or elbowed in the ribs multiple times in past to be reminded of his loose jaw and misplaced wrinkles in such premature age until he was fully aware that it was a sight he preferred conceiling behind the secure shield of his palm. Especially in front of a stranger. “I hope you’re aware that I’ll be calling you Right-chan from now on, no need to introduce yourself. You’re welcome into my life though, I go by Han.”

[lureal]

xingxifan replied to your post “xingxifan replied to your post:He hummed and scanned your entire being...”

"Quite adorable, aren't you?" He walked next to you, watching at every face of the person they pass whenever it was possible before he looked at you. "Whats your occupation?"

“Seriously, are you trying to list down all the possible adjectives I’d be wincing at? Two out of two so far, I must say you’re an innate talent –first pretty and now adorable,” his voice drifted down a notch to dive into a grumble although the bump of his shoulder against the tall stranger spelled out playful. “You make it sound like an investigation, sir –you might as well shove me into a room and hang one light above my head to ask where I was last night too. I’m just a casual graphic designer though; I did basic things a loser would do. You know, munching on cheese puffs, slurping down noodles and watching the rerun of dramas. How about you -what do you do for living?”

[lureal]

"Are you a magician because my wish came true the day I met you."

The art of seduction had never been Luhan’s profession if his former hobby of playing Japanese dating sims was put aside –something the young designer had buried deep within the rear of his library and memory. Hence, his ignorance of pick-up lines and basic flirt chase was transparent although he did attempt using a few tricks under the poorly-lit of nightclubs in the tapered alleys of Itaewon, only resulting in shame and temporary self-hatred. Coming from the lady ahead of him however, he couldn’t help but let out a loud fit of cackles in amusement, his hands soon accompanying after for a round of claps. “Just why would you even use pick up lines on me when I’m the easiest target out there? Aren’t you the cutest?”

[lureal]

I was going to sing some kind of lovely song, but then your basic ass (or lack of) would assume my thirst is real. And I'm not even thirsty over you, like who is you? Be grateful you wake up to a thing from me every day. Even though you igNORE ME UNLESS YOU FEEL LIKE VENTING, YOU ASSHOLE.

By the time Luhan smooths his right hand along the faint eye bag underneath his closed eyelid, his mind settles on two things altogether; his vision is too obscure and his mind is too hazy for this. In the wake of his adamant persuasion to wipe the scraps of drowse off his eyelashes and quaff back the yawn rising up the column of his neck, he pries his lips apart to respond in a gruff voice between weary syllables and sleep-coated vowels. “But you are thirsty, Oh Sehun. For every bit of this. Not like I can accuse you of anything –I mean look at me; woke up handsome, going to bed handsome. And don’t look down on our interaction; I also come to you when we need to analyse a different variety of lesbian pornography. If that’s not real friendship, I don’t know what is.” 

[parafilie]

lureal liked your post: “I’ve found out what I want to be when I grow up. I’ll become a famous…”

Bitch, you really got the nerve to like my shit when you always vanish like the teenage parent that just learned his sperm is now a growing fetus.

[lureal]

I see that you're already practicing the attitude of a drag queen before you undergo your full transformation to step out of your cocoon of pretense to spread out your colorful, fabulous wings like a butterfly. Since like...you were born. I'm glad you finally came to terms with your suppressed urges. 

[lureal]

xingxifan replied to your post:He hummed and scanned your entire being with his eyes nodding. "i never forget pretty faces, especially not yours. I think you've once walled passed this spot right here." A soft grin started to plaster his lips as he looked at you. I'm Kris.

"A PS4 duel? Who would have thought your words would lead to a simple game." He looked around, resting his arm around you. "Sure, lead me there and we’ll play so i can kill your self-esteem a little."

"I would suggest a real fight but—," the flap of his hand was disdainful as his fingers sowed the proposal in the air, a canorous laughter following the suit soon after. "You have to excuse me until I start hitting the gym to gain a few muscles here and there, which would be the doomsday. Till then, let's have you eat your own words and kill your self-esteem instead, Kris."

[lureal]

He hummed and scanned your entire being with his eyes nodding. "i never forget pretty faces, especially not yours. I think you've once walled passed this spot right here." A soft grin started to plaster his lips as he looked at you. I'm Kris.

His skin pleated into spider web-like wrinkles on the rear of his eyes for an impish cringe as he wrenches his composure into a stiffed state at the referred adjective, his nose rumpling around the edge comically as if a foul scent prickled his nostrils. "Pretty? Ouch. If our paths have crossed at all in the past and you called me that, you would have remembered me not by my face but the ache on your muscles after a fight, Kris. Finger muscles, what other battle can I offer other than a PS4 duel?"

[lureal]

luhandemigod replied to your post “Dear lord in heaven, please allow Han-manly-san to notice me for more than 5 minutes. If it can't happen today, it will tomorrow. Many thanks.”

is the joke here that you're actually ghei or--

Are you even allowed to speak?

[lureal]

Dear lord in heaven, please allow Han-manly-san to notice me for more than 5 minutes. If it can't happen today, it will tomorrow. Many thanks.

You can always engage in different activities to capture my attention if you're seeking for it this miserably, Kanye-chan. Especially after professing to be the spawn of devil, I doubt your prayers will be granted any time soon. Lose a couple of your designer clothes and try a nudist approach next time --if you're lucky, my eye might linger on your behind for more than 5 minutes. 

[lureal]

Haven't i seen your face somewhere before?

"This customised, distinctive face?" the young designer chaffs after gesturing a finger at the ascent of his chin, his gaze trailing a path down the line of the stranger's composure to take in his admittedly broad height before plunging upon his complexion. A slanted smile stings against the thick layer of flesh abreast of his lips once his head shakes his head from side to side for a reticent contradiction. "I'd say no but then again I have the worst case of unofficial short-term memory loss --I diagnosed myself with it, no doctor report whatsoever. Let me introduce myself though. I go by Han and you are?"

[lureal]

myveon replied to your post:Oh my god Danny DeVito, I love your work!!!

I thought it was “parfait” I got hungry.

You can eat the maid dress you were trying to fit me into before. I never forget. I'm holding a harsh grudge against you all so if I happen to die in my sleep, I can float above you as an vicious spirit with eerie sounds to make your lives harder. Just like you do.