my recommended fics...
❤︎ ྀི˖ i'll protect you. (gyutaro x reader)
❤︎ ྀི˖ wait a little bit more. (ukai keishin x reader)
❤︎ ྀི˖ why people bother with love. (sawamura daichi x reader)
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❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
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❤︎ ྀི˖ i hope you enjoy my fics as much as i enjoyed writing them!
“with his debut single that topped multiple charts, earning millions of views for the music videos in its first week, let’s welcome the rising solo star, semi eita!”
as soon as the host was done introducing the artist, semi came out of the stage, his charming smile capturing his fans’ heart even more. he walked up the stage, his every little move triggering a squeal from the audience. he took a seat on the chair in the middle of the platform, fixing the mic on the stand.
his acoustic guitar was slung over his body as he waved at the fans, giving them the proper fanservice that he knew they would love.
“good afternoon, everyone.” he greeted the audience as he still fixed the mic stand to the proper height. he chuckled as they cheered back greetings. “thank you so much for coming to see me.” he said as he scanned the crowd with a smile.
“are you all ready for our first song?” he asked and the people immediately went crazy, just like how he expected.
the backtrack started to play as he put on his in-ears. he shifted in the chair, trying to get comfortable as he placed his guitar on his leg.
soloist semi decided that he wants to try going more into mellow songs while gradually trying to find the perfect genre he fits when he's alone than when in a band. he chose a ballad song for his debut piece. a song he wrote and composed on his own.
he's been writing songs in secret for a long time. usually it was riku and mori who composed their songs for hayashi, but now that he's on his own, he wanted to do things his way. he wanted to be the main contributor to his own career, not wanting to blame anyone, but him, if there will be choices in the future that should’ve been chosen over the other.
as the familiar melody played in the background, semi started strumming his guitar. he mostly sang acoustic versions of the band's songs at first with the audience singing along with him. his soothing voice brought smiles on those who aren't familiar with him or the band, ushering them to keep watching his captivating performance. the mall was teeming with people, some halting their shopping just to listen to his singing.
soon, semi finally was about to perform his solo songs. he stood up, fixing the stand to his staggering height.
“for my next song…” he started as the melody played out loud, making the watchers excited. “you all know what this is, right?”
“this is… the song i wrote for… well, you guys know what it is.” he chuckled lightly as he adjusted the strap of the guitar.
he positioned his finger and as soon as he played the first tune, the backtrack followed. it was a soothing sound, one that you can listen to when you want to relax, unless you focus on the lyrics more.
“ooh.. oh…”
“she's the most beautiful in my eyes,
on a rough day, her smile was my prize.
my girl, you’d always be the best,
others don't take my interest.”
“pretty girl, you would always be my muse.
and keeping it to myself’s what i choose.”
“i wondered, how could i ever tell you?
i still love you like when i first met you.
because i know how much you prefer him.
and i'm still nothing compared to him.”
“ just remember i'm always here.
not to ruin or interfere,
but to guarantee you’re secure
since fate has another picture.”
“i miss your smile when we’re together.
but with him, it looks so much better.”
“i wondered, how could i ever tell you?
i still love you like when i first met you.
because i know how much you prefer him.
and i'm still nothing compared to him.”
“i miss your smile when we’re together.
but with him, it looks so much better.”
“i wondered, how could i ever tell you?
i still love you like when i first met you.
because i know how much you prefer him.
and i'm still nothing compared to him.”
“still nothing compared to… him.”
as soon as semi sang the last bits of his song, a rain of applause and cheer surrounded him. some people stood, some people whistled, and some people shouted and screamed. and coincidentally, those shouts and screams came from the same group of people standing on the side of the stage.
it was the same people semi had been blatantly avoiding to make eye contact with in fear that he might burst out laughing as soon as he saw their faces. but, with the way they’re creating a scene, quite chaotic and funny, he knows he can’t ignore them now.
“uhm… some randoms here beside the stage are being too rowdy. i think the securities need to escort them out now.” he spoke to the mic as he got ready to sing some of his b-sides.
“hey! how could you say that?! respect your elders!” riku replied, pushing his sunglasses up to his hair.
mori lowered his phone a bit, continuing taking a video of his bandmate, yet making sure to not let riku take over his job at retorting with smartass replies. “guards, take the man on the stage. that guy’s a terrorist. a fashion terrorist.”
“stop it, you two.” higo scolded the two, pulling them back by the back of their collars, making them sit back on their chairs.
yumi was silently nodding to the non-existent music, acting as if she didn't know the people beside her. she even looked around, waving at the fans, completely ignoring her bandmates' pleas for help as they were reprimanded by higo.
“(y/n)!” riku called for you.
you immediately closed your eyes, nodding along with yumi as the non-existent music somehow miraculously played in both your ears.
“this song’s good, isn’t it?” you said to yumi, who played along with you.
“yeah, probably my favorite.” she replied.
“nothing’s playing!” riku and mori muttered in chorus.
semi chuckled as he watched the chaos happening near him, the fans were capturing the havoc surrounding the band, ready to post it in their respective fan accounts. he refocused on the crowd, hyping them up as the mood gets livelier and higher.
you smiled as you watched from the side. semi is really different whenever he’s in front of the audience. he’s cool and enigmatic, unlike the caring and dependable persona he shows to them when it’s just them friends. it’s both amazing.
at first, you were surprised when you heard he was going to have his solo debut, thinking that semi was going to leave the band to focus on his solo career. thankfully, that wasn’t his plan. he planned to continue being part of the group, wanting to pursue his individual path while being the same guitarist and vocalist of hayashi.
it was the day when you had your conversation with your father when it was decided that semi will be doing an individual project. that day, they were also supposed to let you have another solo comeback, but chose to postpone it for a while because you were late that time, and also because of the scandal that happened.
speaking of the scandal, it’s been four months since that occurred and things have finally died down. of course, there were people who didn’t instantly believe it, but things have been going well since.
the perpetrator? well, ushijima said that she was now focused on getting her father’s recognition and approval. she wanted to showcase her knowledge, the things she worked hard for, to the person who made her want to do that. to be acknowledged.
honestly, after what she did, you really couldn’t care less. you don’t hate her enough to get pissed off just by hearing her name, but you don’t like her enough either to care what she’s been up to.
‘well, congrats to her, at least.’
as semi continued his event, you felt your phone buzzing. you immediately pulled it out from your handbag and smiled.
you tapped on yumi's shoulder and leaned in, whispering in her ear.
“i need to go now.” you uttered with a slightly loud voice to make sure the sounds of the music wouldn’t drown your voice.
yumi looked at you for a moment in confusion, before letting out an ‘ah’ and nodding. she then tugged on mori’s shirt to get his attention and when she did, she told him the same thing to the drummer, before he elbowed riku who was still singing along with semi. riku bobbed his head to you. the four of you exchanged cheek kisses before you looked at the guy on the stage. he was so immersed in performing, you didn’t want to call out to him just to say goodbye.
they bid farewell to you and after that, higo escorted you to the company’s van to take you to the location you wanted. he securely led you to the van, making sure that you wouldn’t get too much attention.
“thank you, higo.” you said as he opened the door.
he nodded, smiling. “of course,” he then instructed the driver as to where you’ll be dropped off, then turned to you. “you can do it.”
you beamed, connecting yours and his cheeks as he took a step back, waving goodbye at you. he carefully closed the door, once you’ve checked that you didn’t forget anything.
“bye, higo. say goodbye to eita for me.” you told him through the window as the van drove off.
the vehicle drove to the location pinned on the map, smiling to yourself as you continued messaging on your phone. you felt giddy, excited even. you’ve been waiting for this for weeks, months even, finally having both of your day-offs in line.
soon, the van stopped and the driver informed you’ve arrived. you lowered your phone and nodded, thanking him as you picked up your bag.
“thank you so much. please take care on your way back.” you uttered, hopping out of the mobile.
“yes, ma’am. have a nice day, ma’am.” the driver replied and drove off.
you took a deep breath, calming yourself down as this is what you’ve been gathering courage for for months.
ushijima had been busy with the league nearing its end. the adlers have been pretty good for the season, taking the first seed in the standings. ushijima and his teammates have been giving their best to maintain their spot at the top as the other teams strive to secure the best spot before the regular season ends and proceed to the postseason, so all the teams could focus on the kurowashiji tournament once it ends.
you walked to the nearby tree, pulling out your phone again as you waited for ushijima to reply. the place had scattered people all over, some with their families, some with their friends, some with their lovers. the place was booming with familiar serenity, one that comforts people with the presence of their loved one beside them.
the perfect place and the only one that should be picked for today.
you felt your phone buzzing again, you looked at the screen and saw ushijima calling. you smiled, clearing your throat before answering.
“hello, love.” he greeted you as soon as you pressed the answer button.
“hi, love. how was your practice?” you replied, leaning on the tree.
“it was fine. i missed you. i’m on my way there. is this right? the location you sent?” he answered, the sound of the car door getting closed echoing in the background.
“yep, that’s right.” you nodded as if he could see your actions.
“it’s ‘minamikoizumi traffic park’?” he asked, his brows furrowed in confusion. ‘that’s—’
“yes, come quickly, okay?” you said as you heard the engine of his car starting.
“okay, love. wait for me there. i’ll be there in 20.”
…
soon, the number of people in the park was slowly decreasing with the parents saying goodbye to each other, sharing one last conversation as their children hugged each other, bidding farewell as they promised to see each other again tomorrow.
you were now sitting on one of the benches, watching their interactions as the sun was slowly hiding behind the horizon, casting a beautiful golden hue over the sky complementing the shade of the clouds.
the breeze was gentle with the way it whirl along with your locks, making the leaves rustle providing a tranquil background noise along with the quiet chats of the other park-goers to you. you closed your eyes, enjoying the white noise of the place.
‘i missed this…’
“love,” you suddenly heard ushijima’s deep voice coming close to where you were.
you immediately opened your eyes and smiled, looking at where he was. he was wearing a white shirt under his track jacket and paired with volleyball shorts, making it clear that he just finished his practice. he was carrying a box of pastries on one hand and refreshments on the other.
“i got you some cheesecake.” he said as he reached your bench. he set the box and drinks on the space next to you while he took a seat. he leaned over to you and pressed a soft kiss on your lips before pulling away. “i missed you.”
“me too, love.” you smiled, staring at him lovingly. “thank you for these. you got them on the way?”
he nodded. “i figured you’d be hungry while waiting. you went to semi’s mall show before this, right?”
“yeah.” you confirmed, “he’s doing mall shows for now before we start getting ready for our next projects.”
you opened the box and your mouth watering at the sight of the beautifully presented cheesecakes. you carefully picked up one slice, bringing it closer to your face.
“love, take a picture of me.” you said to him and as the trained boyfriend he was, his phone was already ready and the camera app clicked before you even said that.
you posed for the camera while he diligently took photos of you. he was committed to the core, he provided posing suggestions, angled the camera well the way you taught him, and found the right lighting.
“that’s fine now. thanks.” you told him and he snapped one more picture before he sat back down, next to you.
“do you want to check the pictures?” he asked, already extending his arms to give you his phone.
“later, i guess. let’s choose what to post later for my insta at home.” you told him as you picked up a fork. “thank you for the food.”
you took a bite out of the cake and savoured the taste of the creamy and cheesy pastry. he watched in delight as you enjoyed the food he bought while thinking of you.
“slowly, love. you might choke on it if you eat too fast.” he reminded you, picking up a piece of tissue and gently wiped the corners of your mouth. “is it good? do you like it?” he inquired.
you were about to answer, but then remembered the last time the same thing happened. he got you cinnamon rolls and asked if you enjoyed it, when you said yes, he brought home cinnamon rolls everyday for almost two weeks.
“y-yeah…” you answered, trailing off, thinking for a while on how to approach this. “but, if i had this everyday, i think i’d get sick of it.” you continued, subtly inserting your comment on his tendency to buy things repeatedly when you say you like something.
“is that so? it seems like i should only avail it once a week.” he uttered to himself.
you closed your eyes in surrender. ‘well, that’s better than everyday for two weeks straight.’
“you should try some too, love.” you said, slicing a small piece since you know he’s not a fan of sweets, yet when you suggested trying it he was already opening his mouth.
you chuckled as you fed him some, he nodded as an acknowledgement that it’s good even for him.
“it’s delicious, right?” you repeated.
“it is. no wonder you liked it.” he answered. “love, can i ask why we’re here?” he suddenly asked.
you smiled, setting down the cake back to the box and then looked up at him. “wanna go for a walk?” you invited him as you stood up, stretching your hand to him, which he naturally took.
the two of you started to walk along the path of the park, holding hands and leaving your food on the bench, trusting your fellow countrymen explicitly. even with the comfortable silence around the two of you, he was confused underneath the stoic expression he was wearing. his hold on your hand tightening occasionally as he thought hard of how to approach or start the conversation.
“love, how was semi’s show?” he finally spoke up.
“it was fine. he looked so happy singing his songs.” you replied, thinking back on how semi looked like on stage earlier. “eita was really enjoying it, i even thought he looked happier performing solo than when in hayashi.” you chuckled.
“no.” he abruptly said, making you look at him with a puzzled look.
“what do you mean?” you asked, tilting your head.
“back when the team was working with your band, our table’s position gave us the best seat to watch your guys’ performance every time. all i can say is that he's definitely happier when performing with the band.” he uttered, thinking back to those times as he watched the swaying trees.
you gazed up at him, confused at what he’s saying, but listened intently.
“maybe it’s because you’re up front that you rarely see him, how he looks when he’s with you guys.” he added.
“i see—” you were about to reply, but he continued.
“i knew that it wasn’t just because he enjoyed performing with you guys. i saw how he smiles when he’s watching you. how he’s always watching you instead of the audience.” he continued and looked at you.
“ah…” you let out, looking away for a bit, realizing his implications.
he marked the way you visibly evaded his eye contact, he tightened his hold on your hand before he said the thing bugging in his head.
“you’re aware that he still has feelings for you, right?” he uttered and he heard you sigh.
you emitted a short chuckle. “i’m not insensitive to not realize it, wakatoshi.”
“so, you do know.” he followed, tracing circles on your skin with his thumb.
“well… i guess. he treated me the same way he always does when we were still together. it’s like nothing changed between us, minus the label, boundaries, and intimacy. so, how could i not notice?” you laughed awkwardly, scratching the back of your head.
“i thought that as long as i ignore it, he’ll move on. i didn’t want to cut ties with him, wakatoshi. he’s one of the people who supported me to become who i am today. even when he’s not my lover anymore, he’s still very precious to me. i’m forever indebted with him and the assistance he gave me. but, i really wish for him to find someone who he can pour all that love he’s giving me.” you uttered then sighed.
you finally looked at ushijima’s eyes and smiled weakly.
“was that a jerk move by me?” you asked, your voice shaking a bit.
ushijima lifted his free hand and stroked your hair gently. “to tell you the truth, my love, i don’t think i’m in any position to have a say in that topic, it was semi who was put in that situation, not me. but, i understand your desire to keep him close to you after everything he’s done for you. in that area, i understand.” he said, his voice flat, yet you can see from his expression the softness that was only reserved for you.
“thank you for understanding…” you smiled, still feeling a bit guilty, yet lighter, for now.
you tugged on his hand to continue walking and he didn’t protest and just let you guide him to wherever you want.
“but know this, wakatoshi, eita is not the only person who helped me.” you said as you stride the park.
you reached the part of the park where the playground was located. numerous recreational equipment around that you decided to try.
“old man okamura, who always treats us whenever sachiko and i are short of our budget for the month back in college.” you started, jumping on a seesaw and walking through it, with ushijima, holding you by your waist to make sure you wouldn’t fall as the other end dropped when you crossed the middle.
“juno, whose admiration always spiked my confidence without fail. his innocent compliments each time that always helps me realize that what i’m doing motivates people.” you said as you went to the merry-go-round with ushijima carefully spinning it, still listening to your words.
“hugo, who always guides us every time we’re met by a high wall and never loses faith in us. taking care of us without rest each time one of us is facing some problems, no matter if it’s with the band or a personal one.” you then moved to the jungle bars, reaching the bars as ushijima lifted you up, his hands on your sides, ready to catch you in case you fell.
“riku, who never gets mad every time i mess up. our leader who leads us throughout our career, putting us above his own career despite the several people contacting him to leave us and be in their team and offering huge money.” you said as you rode the spring rider with your man standing next to you.
“mori, who always makes me laugh. that guy knew i liked how sassy he was, but he never made fun or made a joke of me and my experiences. he’s always seeking to make us laugh to make us comfortable, especially me back when i first joined.” you smiled as you switched to walking down the sensory path with ushijima trailing behind you, still intently listening to you.
“yumi, who always takes care of me. she never needed to ask what happened and always offered her hands without second thoughts. she was like an older sister who never lets her younger sister out of her sight.” you continued, now riding the swing while he pushed you lightly.
“satori, who’s always there even back in high school, he’s always pissing me off but never fails to make me forget about the things i wanted to forget.” you chuckled as you walked through the balance beam.
“and especially… sachiko.” you said as you climbed the slide. ushijima waited at the end of the slide as you squeezed yourself at the start of the equipment and let gravity do the work until you were back in his arms.
“i’ll never be able to live my whole life and still think that i’ve done enough for her, that i was able to pay her back twice for all the things she did for me, sacrificed for me, went through for me…” you muttered as you pulled him to the furthest part of the playground.
he listened keenly to your voice, not noticing where you two were headed. he nodded to whatever you were saying, understanding your appreciation for everyone who helped you throughout everything.
you stepped into the sandbox after taking off your heels, ushijima crouched and picked it up as he joined you, his shoes made it hard for him to remove it, so he just went in wearing it.
“but, i think, i’ll be forever grateful for the kid that i made promise with in this very sandbox back then…” you smiled as you looked at him.
“mhm.” he hummed, not really processing what you said because he was dusting off the sand that was getting in his shoes and socks.
you chuckled.
slowly the words repeated in his mind as he processed what you just said. he looked up at you with wide eyes, thinking he must’ve misheard it.
“what…did you just say, love?” he took a step closer to you, taking your hand to his free one, clasping it tightly, seemingly silently asking you to repeat it, to have you confirm he wasn’t hearing things.
you cupped his cheek with your other hand, instantly making him lean on it as he waited for you to speak. his eyes were full of anticipation and desperation as if begging every being he knew to verify and tell him yes.
“i said… i’m also thankful to the kid that i made promises with here…” you finally said and suddenly it felt like ushijima’s world only consisted of just the two of you.
words formed like stacks in his mind, yet nothing came out of his mouth. he opened his mouth, just to close it again. he couldn’t believe it.
have you really remembered that time now? the place? the time? the surroundings? the promise?
earlier when you sent the location, he thought it was just a coincidence. this exact park was the same park where the two of you often met when you were playing back then. he thought that maybe, you just wanted to spend time with him and have a date, since he’s been busy lately and the location of semi’s mall show was close.
and now that he noticed, it was indeed the same sandbox where you two build sandcastles, isolated from other kids, but not feeling alone. the same place where you stood while he was dragged away by his mother, shouting promises to each other.
“love…” he started, but nothing followed.
“hm?” you hummed, running circles on his cheek with your fingers.
“you remember it now?” he asked, his voice full of uncertainty, but more of hopefulness.
“we promised, right? utsui-kun?” you answered, knowing that’s enough to prove it.
he didn’t need to hear more, he closed the distance between the two of you and embraced you tightly, your heels that he was holding dropping on the sand. he buried his face on your hair, inhaling your scent as if you’re going to slip away from him.
he was ecstatic, but somehow it feels like that term was an understatement to what he’s feeling right now.
he thought that he wouldn’t bother you with those promises ever again, he was content with just having you back in his arms. being his. but, hearing you say you remember him back when you two were children, the promise to only be each other’s, he can’t help but feel like everything is in its place, like the earth was revolving for you two alone.
your hands found their way on his back and hair, your turn to stroke it gently. you felt the same, it’s like something heavy was lifted off your chest you’ve been carrying for months, now that you finally said it.
“the doctor said it was dissociative amnesia. though, it’s not severe with my forgotten memory not affecting my daily life, but still he suggested that medication would still be recommended.” you uttered as he continued hugging you.
“hm. i’m glad to hear that it’s not impeding your everyday life.” he replied, taking a huge sigh of relief.
“back when we were still in high school, i can still recall that promise from time to time, but as time passed i slowly forgot them, until they were buried along with the memories of my past with my family. but, when i met up with dad again, it came back to me too. that’s when i remembered everything, but i still needed time to tell you because i wasn’t ready yet.” you explained to him.
he finally pulled away and stared into your eyes, his hold on your hand not breaking. the golden rays of the sun on your skin was like a masterpiece, something that cannot be done again by the hands of mere humans.
one of a kind, unique, and his.
“do you remember the promises?” he asked carefully.
you nodded, slowly, before looking downwards. your face showed obvious guilt and remorse.
“sorry, wakatoshi. i now understand why you said that back then.” you whispered.
his fingers hooked under your chin and gently lifted them to meet his eyes.
“back then?” he repeated, not sure when you were referring to.
“back when we were in second year high school… when i got together with eita. you said you hated that i broke our promise. we promised to not have any girlfriend or boyfriend except each other, right?” you said, biting your lower lip to prevent it from quivering.
his brows furrowed as he saw the pain in your eyes.
“why are you sad? haven’t i broken the promise too? i agreed to let aika act as my fiance in front of the media.” he replied.
“but, i broke it first and you weren’t technically together with aika…” you mumbled, but he just shook his head.
“no. rather than fighting on who’s more responsible for breaking the promise of not getting someone before us, why don’t we focus more on the other promise?” he shifted the point, smiling a bit.
you looked at him confused. “the other promise?” you echoed, you were about to ask him what it was when it popped in your head.
your cheeks blushed and your eyes widened.
“d-don’t say stuff like that so suddenly. i’m being sentimental here!” you whined, hitting his chest lightly.
he was confused as to why you were embarrassed, but his smile never left his lips. he let go of your chin to hold your hands.
“what’s wrong? did you not remember our other promise?” he inquired.
“i remember!” you retorted. “it’s… that you’ll marry me one day…” you murmured in embarrassment.
“that’s right.” he affirmed. “we’ll make it real, love. soon.” he said before planting a kiss on your forehead.
you looked up at him, still feeling his lips on your skin.
“soon.” you repeated and smiled, before jumping into his arms.
he easily lifted you, wrapping his arms around your waist to not let you slip off. your arms did the same and went around his neck.
“be with me forever?” you said, resting your forehead on his.
“forever. my love for you will never vanish, love. i love you.” he replied, closing his eyes.
when he opened his eyes again, he was met by the beauty of the woman he loves. the woman he wanted to share his life with forever. to be there whenever he needs her, just like how he planned to be for her as well.
there, in the place where it all began, will be the same place where it concluded, but not the end of the story of you two.
“promise?” he asked, making you chuckle.
he leaned forward and connected your lips together, sharing a deep, intimate kiss.
one that seals your promise to each other.
“promise.”
end.
thank you for reading!
so that was it! ''promise" is officially finished! did you guys liked it? do you have any questions? or clarifications? something i forgot to do (i hope i didn't huhu), just ask them on comments, i'll try my best to answer all of them.
once again, thank you for reading and being with me throughout the journey!
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i hope you enjoyed it!
DISCLAIMER: this is a work of fiction. the characters, settings, and plot are products of the author's imagination. while the story includes medical information, it is for entertainment and narrative purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. readers should consult with a qualified healthcare professional for any health concerns or before making any decisions related to their health.
“dissociative amnesia?” sachiko peeked over your shoulder and rested her chin there.
you jumped a little at it and just brushed it off and stared at the screen of your phone. it was the result of the online consultation you did just the other day.
“mhm.” you nod.
“so? you're going to talk to him now?” she asked. you shook your head.
“maybe later on.” you said and put your phone in your bag. “don't you have work today?” you asked her as you saw her following you and putting on her sneakers, instead of her work shoes.
“what are you saying? i used my non-paid leave for this day!” she replied as she continued what she was doing.
you stared at her dumbfounded. you got on your feet and walked closer to her. you opened your arms and pulled her into an embrace.
“thank you.” you said, starting to feel emotional.
“ah, don't start crying now. today is an important play, so don't ruin your voice this early.” she reminded you.
“you're right.” you muttered and grabbed your things.
as you were waiting for the train, you noticed some people looking and pointing at you.
“should i go beat them up before we get on the train?” sachiko said, glaring at those people.
“you'll end up in jail first before you can even hop on the train.” you stopped her. you looked at your side and saw the train coming. “let's go.”
…
higo took off his glasses and rested his back on the chair. pinched his nose bridge with his thumb and pointer finger, he looked at the door.
riku searched for higo around the room with his eyes and found him sitting in front of the table in the corner of the room.
“higo, she's here.” he said. higo put on his smile and wore back his glasses.
“shall we depart, then?” he uttered and fixed his clothes.
they walked back to the band's practice room where everyone had gathered. when they opened the door, they found yumi and sachiko clinging on to you like a child.
“i missed you!” yumi cried.
“yes, yes. i got it already. you've been saying that since i got here.” you chuckled.
“anyway, why are you clinging on to her too, sachiko?” mori asked while he readied his things.
“am i not allowed?” she replied. “being her best friend, i think i have the right, you lonely soul.”
“lonely?” mori asked, not sure what sachiko meant by that.
“go find yourself a lover. you're single.” she teased and stuck her tongue to him.
and they suddenly heard an overdramatic clearing of someone's throat. you all looked to the door and saw riku rubbing higo's back sympathetically.
“m-my bad, higo. i promise that was meant for mori only.” sachiko quickly followed.
“i'm okay. eita's single too.” he replied.
“i'm not interested.” semi laughs.
“ah, we don't have time to dilly dally. we're heading out. it's our comeback with full members on board.” higo immediately changed the topic once he remembered it.
“roger!” everyone, even sachiko, shouts.
just as everyone was moving out. you heard semi call you. you looked at him and stopped. the rest continued talking to each other and didn't seem to notice you two were left there.
“what's up, eita?” you asked.
“um… sorry…” he fixed his eyes on the ground, not having the courage to look you in the eye.
you furrowed your eyebrows.
“sorry? uh… for what…?” you asked him, scratching your head. “also. shouldn't i be the one apologizing for causing you and the band trouble?”
he quickly looked at you, surprised. “i—”
‘don't tell me… wakatoshi didn't tell her that i knew it was aika who did it, but still didn't do anything about it?’
“huh? eita?” you waved your hands in front of his face.
‘but, why?’
“eita!”
his body jumped lightly at your voice.
“oh. you're back.” you said. “you okay?” you asked.
“mhm. sorry, just shocked.” he muttered, running his fingers through his hair.
‘i see. just as how much she trusted me, you trusted in me too, right, wakatoshi?’
he laughed.
“let's go.” he said and walked. “we gotta show them how amazing our vocalist is.” he then patted your shoulder.
…
as soon as you entered the mall, eyes shooting at your group and murmurs immediately filled the venue.
“ignore them.” yumi said and stood beside you.
“mhm, i know.” you replied. “we came here to perform. i'm not going to let myself get distracted by this.” you said and smiled.
sachiko stared at you, then at your hand.
‘i just know, despite her saying things like that and acting all brave. she is still scared, and i don't even blame her.’
‘her joining the band at this time is a double-edged sword.’
‘while it can be a chance to retake her name and image, the possibility of the crowd treating her with hostility is there and it just might affect the band's image even worse.’
‘but if she chooses to face it all even with that risk, i'll always have your back and support every decision she makes.’
“(y/n),” she calls.
you looked back at her and she held your hand.
“i'll be watching from the crowd.” she said and pressed her cheeks onto yours lightly.
“are you sure? higo said you can watch alongside him in the back stage.” you asked.
“no. i'll go watch you guys with the audience. you know, so if someone was badmouthing the band, i can easily— heh.” she just gave you a mischievous look, instead of finishing what she was saying.
“just be careful, okay?” you told her, raising the white flag with her plans.
“mhm. satori said he's watching too.” she said as she started walking.
“what? how?” you asked.
she then raised her hand, holding her phone and tendou's on the screen waving at you. you just chuckled and waved back.
“(y/n),” you heard riku called you.
you looked behind you and saw him, motioning his hand to come close.
“let's get ready.” he muttered.
you quickly went over to him. the others were already on the stage; with the covers down, checking their equipment and instruments.
all of the sudden, you suddenly felt shivers. you ball your fists and started thinking about how another mistake of you this time would drag your band down again.
the leader was quick to notice.
“(y/n), listen here.” he placed his hand on your head. you looked up at him with confused eyes.
“no matter what happens today, even if the audience walks out in the middle of the performance, or they start booing, just remember one thing— as long as the singer doesn't stop, we will never drop our instruments. i'll continue to play the drums, yumi will continue to play the keyboard, and eita and mori will continue playing their guitar.”
“you're our main gun. i might be the leader of the band, but during our performance you're our leader. you lead us and we follow. so, you don't have to worry about us. we'll back you up with anything.” he assured you with a comforting smile.
you smiled back at him and nodded.
“thank you, riku. you're the best leader.” you said and bump your fist into his chest.
“hey, you two. hurry up and check your things.” yumi shouts from her position. “riku! stop stealing my baby (y/n) from me!” she added.
“huh?! it's the other way around!” riku cried and went to her girlfriend.
“(y/n), let's do our best!” she said with a wide smile.
you nod your head.
“hey, just want to let you all know in two weeks our album will be released and three days after that it'll be my birthday. i'm reminding you all in case you forgot.” mori smirked as he connected his guitar to the amp.
“that’s right, that's right. our spoiled youngest's birthday is about to come. we should celebrate it with a blast.” riku said and went to rub mori's hair, that the white-haired quickly swatted away.
“argh! we're about to perform. stop ruining my hair!” he screamed and fixed his locks.
“should we go out of town?” yumi suggested.
“well, that might be good.” riku said in a thinking stance. “well, why don't we ask what the celebrant wants?” he asked and turned to mori, who made himself busy checking the chords.
“well, it's the week when we release the album, so i'm sure we'll be busy. so, i want to at least, you know… um…” he turned around and turned his back towards all of you.
“i just wanted to celebrate it with everyone. it doesn't have to be flashy... you know… just enough where we can enjoy ourselves and forget our personal problems for a moment… ah, shit. it's so embarrassing to say it out loud…” mori then ruffled his own hair.
“hahaha. mori, you sure are a tsundere.” semi laughs as he puts his arms over mori's shoulders.
“s-shut up!” he immediately retorts and flung his arms.
you all laughed as you watched semi tease mori and was soon joined by riku.
…
“sachiko-neesan!”
sachiko looked at where the voice came from and saw jun waving happily.
“jun! why are you— wait, i shouldn’t ask that, right? i’d be more surprised if you’re not here.” sachiko immediately stopped herself and greeted each other by hugging.
“that’s exactly right! i can’t miss (y/n)-neesan’s comeback! pops let me off while he watches over the shop. he said to say hello to you.” jun jumped on sachiko’s arms. “i’ve also brought along someone… he was pacing back and forth at the entrance. i saw him talking to (y/n)-neesan last time at the shop.”
“h-hey,”
sachiko looked to her side when someone spoke. she did not say anything and just raised her eyebrow.
“what are you doing here?” she asked.
“n-no. i just wanted to see my daughter's performance and also tell her that i’ve got a new job.” he said.
sachiko just sighed.
“make sure you cheer for her louder than i do or else she won’t see you.” she said and focused on the smaller stage where you will perform.
“i’ll try.” your father replied.
“that’s impossible! no one can be as loud as sachiko-neesan.” jun joked that resulted in him getting a headlock.
“i’m not only talking about myself… look.” she muttered and pointed somewhere with her lips.
..
soon the crowd filled the whole ground floor with cheers. the emcee had started introducing the players present in the meet.
while you all waited for the cover to lift up, you managed to peek over to where the players were. instead of maintaining eye contact with the crowd, ushijima kept glancing towards your side.
“mr. ushijima, i know your girlfriend is over there, but look to the front.” hirugami whispered while keeping a smile on his face.
“i’m sorry.” he apologized and fixed his stance.
“so? is everything okay now? you told us not to worry about it, so we kept our asses out.” sokolov asked while he waved at the fans.
“yes. everything’s fine now. i just checked it.” he answered confidently.
“if you say that then.” he replied.
you were listening to the cheers while fiddling with the mic stand.
‘the audience cheered for wakatoshi and adlers just like how they used to in the past fanmeet.’
‘we’ve always been the baggage here, we’re here to provide live background music and to promote our name and our upcoming album.’
‘because of the issue, i know even if just a small one, it left a bad impression, but i hope they also cheer for us like they used to.’
“ushijima, a word before we start?” the host asked and put the mic just below his chin.
“don't hold back. we have your back, so just do what you want to do.” he said and the crowd clapped and cheered, thinking it was some motivational words for them.
but for you, it’s as if he was talking to you and you only. it might just be your imagination, but it still calms you down.
you chuckled.
“hey, hey,” riku called.
you all walked towards him and circled around his drums.
“just like usual.” he grins and extends his arms with his fingers tucked in his palm.
you all then bumped your fist together and shouted, just enough so the people from the other side of the cover won’t hear you.
“now, let’s give it all up for hayashi!”
‘even if it’s one person, as long as there’ll be cheers, i’ll sing. we’ll give it all and perform.’
“everyone—”
you didn’t even finish what you were saying when the crowd immediately cut you off with their noise.
the whole place was filled with their cheers. the people from the higher floor also join while looking down from the railings.
they hold their banner with the name of the band, some with the band’s logo, some with the picture of the member, but one thing’s for sure.
most of the attendees today came to see the band. they came to see you.
even the athletes were surprised, but happy for your team.
you stared at the audience and how they genuinely cheered for you.
‘it’s not an unusual sight, yet it feels like it's been so long. i definitely expected less cheers. it makes me feel all tingly.’
“(y/n)-chan, i’ve been waiting!”
“i’m a new fan! you guys are amazing!”
“i’ve seen the news before i came here! i’m so glad!”
before you all can even forget, riku hit his stick together counting down when you should start.
you immediately ready yourself and sang as soon as they played the tune.
while performing the first song, you spotted sachiko, tendou on the phone, jun, along with your father.
you pointed at them, telling them you see them and jun and sachiko went on full fanatic mode, while your father happily clapped along with the music.
‘they look so chaotic over there.’
as you moved onto the next song, you went to interact with the crowd and saw someone familiar.
‘it’s the girl from the last show.’
‘she looks distressed. maybe she feels bad for suddenly running away last time.’
you walked towards her direction and waved and gave her a thumbs up. her face lights up with relief.
‘when you don’t know what’s happening or when things get out of hand, running away from it would never not cross your mind. i know it well.’
you then look to where your friend is.
‘good thing, i have someone to run away with.’
you walked back to the mic stand and smiled at your bandmates in the process.
‘i have friends who helped me too.’
“looks like she's having fun.” hirugami muttered while shaking hands with the fan in front of him. “this time it looked like we’re the added guests.”
“yeah. i don’t mind” ushijima agreed.
“ushijima-san, i'll cheer for your relationship with (y/n)-san to last!” the fan in front of said.
ushijima smiled a little and thanked them. he then peeked to you performing, when you were exactly looking at him too.
out of adrenaline, you formed your hand into a half heart. ushijima, wondering what you were doing, just clapped and gave you a thumbs up, making the people crack up and ushijima's teammate tell him what he should've done.
‘i wonder why? why are the audience reacting this way? why are they suddenly so supportive? did something happen?’
you then glanced at higo to the side of the stage and he was wagging his phone in his hand, looking like he's about to cry.
he's moving his lips like he's saying something.
‘yeah, i can't hear a word you're saying, higo, but i know it's some good news, right?’
you focused your eyes to the front and watched how everyone sang and danced along the music.
‘ah. this is too much fun. nothing really beats being on the stage and performing.’
‘this thrilling sensation, how i've missed this.’
…
“now that we've heard words from our amazing schweiden adlers players. while they are off the stage, let us thank the one who provided us with fantastic music!” the host then pointed at you all.
everyone immediately bowed to the crowd, as they applauded.
riku went and thanked the fans for being a good audience, as well as for supporting the band for the past four performances while working with schweiden adlers. also, not forgetting about the album.
“thank you so much again.” he thanked one last time before bowing.
“then, how about a word from (y/n)?” the host suddenly said.
‘huh?’
‘this is like the—’
you suddenly felt yumi’s hand on your back, you looked at her and saw her smiling from ear to ear.
you were confused, but still you walked to where he was. he handed you the mic with a sweet smile.
mori looked at yumi asking her why she trusts the emcee.
“don't worry, that host is a fan of ours. i checked it.” she said,
as soon as you held the mic, the people immediately cheered loudly.
‘what should i say?’
“before anything else… thank you so much for going all the way here to see us.” you said and bowed.
“we'll follow you even if you're performing in black hole!” a voice from somewhere in the back said, making people laugh, along with you, and the ones on the stage.
“thank you.” you chuckled.
you saw how they listened intently to you.
“i know these past few days have been rough, but i wanted to thank you for still staying and supporting us. thank you so much.” you said and attempted to bow again.
suddenly, both of your hands were clasped with a hand on each side. you turned to your side and saw mori, semi, yumi, and riku all holding hands.
you smiled widely before giving count on when to bow.
“ready…”
“thank you so much!” you five shouts, as the audience shouts back—
“thank you for your hard work!” and clapped.
as you got off the stage, the crowd were chanting the band's name, even after you left backstage.
“everyone!” higo's voice was the first thing you all heard as soon as you got off the spotlight.
“what's wrong, higo?” semi asked the manager.
“look at this!” he said and showed his phone screen.
mori took a closer look and read it out loud for all of you.
“‘ushijima wakatoshi said “fiancè” have admitted that their relationship was nothing but a front. she also said that she has nothing against the band's hayashi lead singer, (y/n), and that they're actually acquitted with each other and are on good terms. she also wishes the couple the best.” he read.
all immediately furrowed their brows.
“since when are they on good terms?” mori asked.
“nothing against, (y/n)?” semi followed.
“she wishes them the best?” yumi followed semi.
“someone actually believed this crap?” riku finishes.
“well, she's from a wealthy family, so they probably don't want to smudge their family name. also, it's not just this statement that convinced the people,” higo scrolled through the comments and found ones with the most likes. “look at this…”
mori leaned in once again to be the reader.
“that's right, that's right! i refuse to believe she would do that! when i was on a train with my grandma, she voluntarily gave up her seat for my grandma. someone as considerate as her would never!”
“my little brother got lost one time, ms. (y/n) and her friend ms. sachiko found him and helped him calm down and find us. my sister and i were relieved. i'm really thankful for them, because if they hadn't helped my brother that time, it would've been a trauma for him.”
“(y/n)-neesan is innocent! sure, sometimes she orders weird food combinations, but it can be overlooked as soon as you hear her sing and with how kind she is—” wait, this is just the comment of the cafe's owner's son, jun was his name, right?” mori immediately stopped when he noticed.
“there are many more, but a lot have backed up (y/n). they even said they'll be “(y/n)’s protector”-something like that and how, even if he could send off their head to exosphere with a slap, they won't forgive ushijima if he hurts her.” higo uttered and put away his phone.
“what the hell is that?” mori commented, when suddenly they heard you chuckled, that soon turned into laughter.
“really, what the hell?” you said as you wiped off the tears about to fall.
a true tear of joy.
“then, i guess i'll also report to them if ever mori is being mean.” you muttered.
“excuse me? i'm never mean.” mori replied, with an offended face.
“um, sorry. excuse me for a bit.” you said before you ran off.
they were all too surprised to stop you.
when sachiko, jun and your father saw you running, jun immediately thought of calling out to you, but he was immediately stopped by sachiko.
“she has some business to do, so let's meet up with the others.” she said and led them to where higo and the others were.
you ran to where the player's waiting room was and just as you were getting near it, with the help of the universe's beautiful timing, they were all heading out with ushijima at the back of the group.
“wakatoshi!” you called.
the others looked as well, but immediately read the situation and decided to leave you two alone.
you jumped into his arms, and he effortlessly caught you, subconsciously putting his arms around your waist. you wrapped your arms around his neck and hugged him tightly.
“what's wrong?” he asked as he gently rubbed your back up and down, his research on how to be a good boyfriend is definitely showing up.
“thank you.” you said and buried your face on his neck.
“i didn't do anything worth thanking for. all i did was tell aika to tell the truth. even though most of what she said were still lies.” he replied.
“but, you were still the one who did the initiative.” you loosen your arms to look at his face.
“but, what convinced the people was those words from those you helped in the past.” he muttered.
you smiled at him.
“still, you told me that you're going to fix this…” you said. “and you did.”
“hm?” he hummed.
“you kept your promise, didn't you?” you continued as you looked into his, now slowly widening eyes.
“do you—”
before he can speak more, you close the gap between your face and softly kiss him. he just shut his mouth and pulled you to a tight embrace once your lips parted.
“thank you.” is the only thing you can say to each other.
“let's go?” you asked him and he nodded.
you took his hands and walked proudly to where everyone was.
to be continued…
if you're interested for the next one, the whole story is already available on my patreon.
if you'd like to support me, you can also check here!
❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
i hope you enjoyed it!
“(y/n), i'm home.” sachiko called as she hung her coat on the rack.
‘is she sleeping?’ she walked to your room and just when he was about to knock on your door, the bathroom door opened. she looked in its direction and saw you just finished taking a shower.
“hey, i'm bac—”
as soon as you saw her, you immediately hurried to her and embraced her.
“what's wrong?” she asked concernedly.
“sorry.” you muttered.
“huh? for what? did you eat my ice cream in the fridge? i'm not forgiving you.” she said, but she still ran her hands up and down your back.
“not that.” you chuckled. “sorry for making you worry.” you said and hugged her tighter.
she froze for a second before she embraced you back and tighter.
“stupid.” she whispered.
you were about to lift your head to look at her, but you felt her shaking as she cried in relief. “don’t go making me worry about you like that. you didn’t eat for almost two days, you idiot.” she said, trying her best to hold back the sobs that were already coming out.
“sorry.” you chuckled, caressing her back.
“mhm…” she just hummed.
“i don’t even know if i thanked you enough already for opening my eyes back then with the incident with dad.” you said, your lips forming a smile as she gripped on my shirt tightly, almost physically trying her best to hold her emotions in.
“don’t… don’t start with that shit…” she murmured, groaning, already knowing that that topic is a weak spot for her.
“if it wasn’t for you, i probably wouldn’t have continued to be stuck in the same path… blindly believing that i should be grateful that he still hasn’t disowned me or threw me out…” you continued, pulling away, but she kept clinging to you, not letting go of your shirt.
she looked at you, her lips quivering and her eyes watery.
“because of you, i was able to move forward. you’ve done so much for me. most people wouldn’t even go the same lengths as you did, sachiko…” you said, as you tuck strands of hair behind her ears.
“you willingly shared your home, your money, and your future with someone like me, who you didn't even know back then. thank you for trusting me, sachiko. thank you.” you said before bowing formally to her.
“dummy. why are you thanking me? and why are you being so formal?” she said, immediately fixing your position, before she pulled you to a hug again.
“because, i was—” before you could even continue, she talked over you.
“i was the one who took you away from your home, so i should be the one thanking you for trusting me. thank you for believing that just us two will be able to navigate life as teenagers who know nothing about life.” she muttered, full of gratitude and appreciation. you listened as you hugged her back.
“thank you for being with me all these years, sachiko. i would’ve never survived this world on my own.” you said as you felt her nod.
“mhm. me too… i feel the same way…” she sobbed.
both of you stayed like that for a while, muttering recognition to each other. after a few moments, you two had decided to eat the food she brought along on the way home, thinking it could make you cheer up.
“that's right. wakatoshi was here today.” you muttered sitting across from her.
“really?” she asked even with her mouth full.
“yeah, it seems like it rained hard to where they were and the electricity was cut off for days.” you explained.
“ah, so that's what happened.” she replied and continued eating.
“now that i think about it, i think he told me the day we were about to perform that day that it's raining in their location. can't believe that slipped out of my mind.” you said, shaking your head.
sachiko looked at you for a moment before asking the million dollar question.
“so, what are you going to do now?” she asked with a straight face.
“two days from now... will be the last performance with them.”
…
*bzzt*
as he did not hear that someone's coming to open the door, he pressed the doorbell again.
and this time he heard someone running to answer the ring.
“yes, yes. coming!” a woman who looks like she's in her 50's opened the door and peeked to see who rang the doorbell.
“good evening.” ushijima greeted the lady without changing his expression.
“wakatoshi-sama, welcome.” she opened the door wider for ushijima to enter.
she closed the door and they walked the hallway.
“i'll let your mother know that you're here to pick her up.” she bowed to go and was about to walk away.
“no, i'll go to where they are. tell aika that i’m here, thank you.” he said and walked towards where his and aika's mother, suzuki youko, usually is.
“wakatoshi, you're here?!” youko said in delight, making ushijima's mother look at the direction her friend is looking.
“wakatoshi, what are you doing here?” she asked, with a hint of suspicion.
“wakatoshi?! he's here?” aika came running as soon as she heard it from the maid.
they all had the same question.
“don't tell me… you're here to see my daughter, aika? that's it, right?” youko as she walked closer to the gentleman.
aika can only chuckle nervously, she knows that's not the reason.
and ushijima’s mother is thinking the same. she knows that he would never come here just to see aika.
“yes, that's right. i came here to see her.” he answers that made youko happier.
‘something's definitely up.’ his mother thought.
she looks at aika and sees how uncomfortable and restless she is.
“are you here to invite her to dinner? just the two of you? i knew it. aika, what are you waiting for over there? hurry up and change. wakatoshi's waiting.” she orders her daughter firmly.
“it's right that i came here to see her, but my intentions are far from what you are thinking. i'd never spend my time like that.” he cuts off.
“what? you say being with aika is a waste of time? ha.” youko snickered.
she looks at ushijima's mother, who was surprised her son just said that in front of aika's mother.
“wakatoshi, stop that.” she said and walked up to her son.
“but, i'd rather practice volleyball. better yet, spend it with my girlfriend.” he told his mother with a straight face with no hint of malice, just pure facts.
“your girlfriend? you mean that girl in the news? she's not like my daughter. what are you thinking about getting together with her?” youko said and placed her hand on her hip.
“what do you mean? of course, (y/n) is not like aika. that's why i am with her.” he answered without a hint of provocation.
“wakatoshi!” his mother called. “stop with this rudeness. why are you really here?” she asks.
“i'm quite sure aika is aware of the reason for my visit.” he shortly answered.
the two mothers looked in aika's direction. she shook her head furiously.
“it's her fault! it's not mine!” she screamed and ran to her mother's arms. “mom, i just did it because i can't think of anything else!” she cried.
“aika, what is happening? what are you talking about?” youko asked her daughter, but she only cried and cried.
“wakatoshi?” his mother turned to him. her eyebrows furrowed in curiosity.
“the news. she planned all of it.” ushijima revealed.
“what?” is all what his mother can say.
“aika, you did what?” youko asked her daughter, but she cried even more, making the mother pique her curiosity more.. “aika! explain yourself!” she scolded.
aika immediately tried to hold back her tears, though some are still flowing out, she just wipes it off. she took a step back, while she cleans her face with her hands.
“youko, calm down. we're—” ushijima's mother tries to comfort the mother and daughter.
“how can i calm down after hearing that my daughter is ruining other people's lives?” she said, eyes enraged as she looked at her daughter. “she's acting like her father.”
“youko!” ushijima's mom ran to aika and wrapped a hand on her back. “let's at least ask aika if it's true!” she defended the young one.
“aika, can you talk?” she checked.
“it's not my fault.” aika repeated.
“what's not your fault?”
“it was (y/n)'s fault! she stole wakatoshi from me!” she screamed and her tears fell again.
“(y/n) stole wakatoshi?” the guy's mother echoed.
ushijima squinted his eyes, as did aika's mother.
“a-aika, did you really plan all of that? those stories and those people too? did you pay them to do that?” she asked.
“i already told you, she did all of those. my friend saw her at the same event, but when he told him to confess the truth, she threatened him.” ushijima added semi's story.
“wakatoshi!” aika turned her body to ushijima's direction. “at least, listen to my side and hear the reason why i did that!” she cries as she flung her arms around.
“why—”
words that were about to come out of ushijima's mother’s mouth came to a halt when she glanced at her friend and saw her hand lifting her hand.
she immediately stopped her hand.
“youko, calm down!”
she ignored her and just glared at aika.
“why are you like this? aika? why are you acting like that stupid father of yours?: she uttered and slowly put down her hand.
“doing anything as long as they get what they want, even if it destroys the lives of everyone around them. only thinking about themselves. really, i regret letting you do what you want and trusting that you won't be like your father.” she added.
“wait, youko! how can you say that to your daughter—”
before ushijima's mother even finished the sentence, youko looked at her with piercing eyes.
“excuse me, but can you please leave us? i want to talk to my daughter alone.” she said,
ushijima's mother swallows her saliva. it has been a while since she saw her friend look like this. she never liked those times.
“o-oka—” she was about to answer, but her son interrupted.
“no,” he stopped. “i didn't come here to watch this.”
“what?” youko looked at ushijima.
“i want aika to take responsibility for what she did.” he continued, making aika flinch.
youko let out a snicker.
“hey, come on, wakatoshi. it's like you're telling aika should be put…” she uttered smirking but not happy about it.
ushijima just stared at her indifferently.
“i’ll have to ask (y/n) first if that’s what she wants, but for now, i want her to tell the people the truth. not only did she ruin my girlfriend's performance, but almost her career too. she should take responsibility for her stupid actions.” ushijima spoke while youko stared at him.
he then turned to aika, his gaze hard and imposing.
“i’ll never leave (y/n) because of this, nor will she do the same. if you’re thinking that if you manage to break us apart, i’ll be with you. you’re wrong. i only want (y/n). it’s her or no one.”
aika stared at him with despair as his harsh words fell from his lips. her eyes wide in disbelief. she couldn’t believe he would utter such painful words to her.
after youko promised to ushijima that she’ll take care of it and waited for her daughter to calm down, youko led aika to her room.
“aika.” she called her weeping woman.
aika did not respond, making youko sigh.
“why are you so desperate to have wakatoshi?” youko asked aika, as she closed the door after asking the maid to be left alone with her.
her daughter now sobbing on her bed, held onto her pillow tightly.
“you'd never understand.”
“then, explain it to me so i can understand it. it's that simple.” the mother said with a sneering tone.
“it's not that simple!” aika sat on her butt and faced her mother. “if it was then maybe i could've stopped what i'm feeling a long time ago.”
aika looks down in frustration. youko walked to her and sat beside her. she holds her daughter's hand tightly.
it was only a matter of seconds before aika dove into her mother's arm and cried and cried as she explained everything to her mother.
…
aika wasn't attracted to ushijima in the beginning. for her, he was just the son of her mother's friend. someone who is three years younger than her. someone who is very obsessed with volleyball, but she never understood why.
when her parents divorced, it was hard for her. she knows what the reason was, she's old enough to understand. his father only cares about money and business and himself.
if it will not make money, then it's the same as being useless.
that's why aika pressured herself to study how business works, even if she disliked it, just so that she can be of use to her father.
but, he never gave her the chance to show off her knowledge and skills. the reason? he thinks it's a joke to risk money to someone who he's not sure can handle things.
“why is he so obsessed with money?” she asked herself while standing on the veranda.
“everyone is obsessed about something. some just turn into a bad obsession.”
she jumped slightly when someone suddenly spoke beside her.
“wakatoshi… kun…”
‘he must be here to pick up auntie, but they're still talking about something in mom's room.’
“what do you mean by that?” she asked.
“wanting something is only natural.” ushijima said.
aika looked forward and laughed.
“you're making it sound like i'm not a human being.” she said,
“are you saying you don't have something you wanted?” ushijima curiously questioned.
“hmm… maybe i wanted to know why people want money?” she muttered.
“that's just a question.” he countered. “living without wanting anything is like driving without a destination.”
aika looked at him.
“even if you know how to drive, if you don't know where you're heading, you might get lost.” he said and turned around and started walking.
“why don't you try and search for something you like and have it as a goal in your life? i'm sure you can do that, since you're the same person who studied and mastered something you don't like with ease.” he added and went to get his mother.
she was stunned. this was the first time they talked this long and he even complimented her.
‘since when did that guy get that cool? i'm pretty sure he just graduated from high school last year, right? he didn't pursue college and instead went to play pro volleyball immediately. how come he knows such cool words?’
it was a slow pace, but aika realized that ushijima's words were right. if his father is obsessed with something, then she should want her acknowledgement.
she started this goal with that in mind.
and… another building obsession she had with the guy who gave her encouragement.
“sorry, is wakatoshi here?” aika asked the guy standing in the door of the gym.
“sorry, who?” he queried.
“i'm suz—” she answered, but was cut off.
“are you perhaps, (y/n)?” a guy walking towards them said.
‘(y/n)?’
“(y/n)? ah! you mean the woman mentioned by ushiwaka!”the first guy said.
“yes?” she repeated.
“ah, actually last week while playing around, since the practice just ended and some were feeling a bit playful, they played truth or dare and this guy was dared to ask who ushijima loves and he straight up said (y/n) and walked away.” he explained.
aika saw ushijima walking in the gym, he looks like he just finished showering and is ready to leave. she didn't call him, instead she went out by herself.
she went home and there she found her mom and ushijima's mother. her mother went to answer the telephone, so she was left together with her.
“auntie, can i ask you something?” she started.
“yes, what is it, aika?”
“who's (y/n)?” she said and ushijima's mother looked at her like she's asking where she learned that name from.
she noted how aika's face expressed a lot. hurt. desperate. hoping. she thought that maybe aika did not assume a guy like ushijima, who rejected aika unconsciously and indirectly multiple times, would have someone he actually loves.
she probably just thought that the reason she got turned down was because he's not interested in dating and he's more focused on his job.
but, that wasn't the case at all. he was just waiting for someone all this time.
and ushijima’s mother knows that woman's name very well.
one thing is because she was there when her son made that promise with the little girl in the park.
for an adult like her, at that time, she thought it was just one stupid swear made by kids. but, she didn't expect that ushijima would hold onto it and still sought not to break it.
she just overheard it when ushijima was talking to his grandmother. this (y/n) girl seems to have forgotten about him and got together with his teammate and friend. how she broke their promise.
she explained everything to aika.
“d-does that mean…” aika was hopeful.
“yeah,” she answered and aika's face lit up. “but, it appears she's still in his mind.”
aika looked down and clenched her fist.
“auntie, i… want wakatoshi. i love him!” she suddenly said, “please, auntie. help me. he doesn't deserve to be hurt like this. how can she forget him and go out with his friend?! i'll love him with all of me! i swear to make him happy!”
“aika…” ushijima's mother stared at her, before she smiled. “okay, i got it. i'll help you.”
…
she cried in her mother's arms, until she calmed down. youko thought it would be for the best to let her rest for now.
“you should get some rest for now.” she said and laid her daughter on her bed.
youko watched aika tuck herself to the comforter. “i'll be back, okay?”
aika just hummed. youko got out of aika's bedroom and told the maids to prepare some food.
aika just stared at the nothingness.
“i swear to make him happy!”
she reminisced when she swore that.
‘in the end i didn't manage to keep the promise either.’
‘making him happy…’
‘indeed, i think he's a lot happier now. maybe i managed to keep the promise.’
‘too bad, i'm not the reason.’
she closed her eyes and suddenly she remembered those words.
"just so you know, i love (y/n). that means her happiness is my priority and if that happiness of hers would be taken away because of my selfish desire, i would rather watch her with wakatoshi than see her crying and in pain."
‘semi eita… i'm sure i thought how stupid you were to let go of the person you love, the one you want, your obsession.’
‘but, i think i'll have to praise you for how pure your love is.’
‘i wish i could've learned that a little earlier.’
she curled up like a cat and covered her whole body with the covers.
‘i should've noticed it too… wakatoshi, you're a bad obsession.’
…
just as you finished calling ushijima, who nonchalantly narrated to you what happened when he confronted aika and her mother, you went inside and saw the news sachiko is watching.
“just in!!”
“despite the issues circulating, the band hayashi are still expected to perform for schweiden adlers!”
“their main vocalist, (l/n) (y/n), who's in a hot seat for having an ‘affair’ with ushijima wakatoshi, will join the performance for the first time since the concern came up!”
to be continued…
if you're interested for the next one, the whole story is already available on my patreon.
if you'd like to support me, you can also check here!
❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
i hope you enjoyed it!
it only has been thirty minutes since you went to sleep and he can already hear your soft snores. he wanted to stay like that, holding you in his arms, for a little longer, but he needs to do something important.
with one last kiss, he carefully pulled his arms out and stood silently.
“i'm heading out.” he whispered to you, as he kissed you softly in the cheeks. “sleep tight.”
he walked to the door as quietly as possible. he looked at you one more time, before closing the door and walking out. he grabbed his things and headed for the door.
when he opened it and his brows raised slightly at who he saw.
“semi.” ushijima uttered, his surprise barely even noticeable.
semi was just as surprised as him, he was already in a motion of pressing the doorbell, until ushijima, opening the door, halted his actions.
“wakatoshi! what are you— oh, wait. of course, you're here. you're her boyfriend, yeah.” semi reminded himself, laughing.
“semi, what are you doing here?” ushijima asked, bringing semi back to reality.
“ah. it's just... i wanted to talk to (y/n).” he stated, looking away.
“(y/n) is sleeping right now and i won't suggest waking her up, because she needs it.” ushijima firmly said.
hearing that, semi scratched the back of his head. “i see. well, i can't do anything about that.”
ushijima stepped out and then closed the door.
“but, i guess it's fine. i also wanted to talk to you, wakatoshi. is it okay?” semi asked.
“well, as long as it won't take that long.” ushijima agreed.
the two went to a nearby shop. some people are looking their way, seeing ushijima wakatoshi, japan's canon, in the city while he has some issues going on and no one dared to ask for his autograph or even a picture.
also, he's with semi eita. the bandmate of the person who's also in the rumours.
“i heard adlers had training, how was it?” semi started as he chugged his drinks.
“it was fine.” the other guy answered.
“i see,” semi replied.
“what do you want to talk about, semi?” ushijima brought up the topic.
semi's adam's apple bobbed up and down before he put down his cup. he sighed and glanced up at ushijima, then broke it off as fast.
“you know, wakatoshi, i've known it from the start.” he started staring at his cup. ushijima furrowed his brow.
“i've always known i can't win against you.” he added.
‘is he talking about volleyball?’ ushijima thought.
“somehow, i can feel like i know what you're thinking.” semi laughed. “and no. it's not volleyball, wakatoshi.”
“i've always known you have her heart.”
…
“hey,” i greeted as soon as she walked up to me.
she looks happy and excited, but the nervousness is more evident in her face making me chuckle.
“w-what?!” she embarrassedly roared.
“no, it's nothing.” i smiled.
i leaned forward to her and held her by her hips and planted a kiss on her cheeks. “you look good as always.” i said and she smiled widely.
she wrapped her arms around my neck and pecked on my lips.
“thank you, so do you. handsome as ever.” she praised me, putting butterflies in my stomach.
“thank you. let's go?” i asked and her nervousness came back. she simply nodded and hopped in the rental car. during the ride, i can't help but notice how restless she was.
“hey,” i called for her, she snapped her head in my direction.
when the traffic light turned red, i looked at her gently grabbing her hands.
“hey, it's fine. okay? i swear they're gonna love you. my bandmates are easy to get along with, i promise.” i said, giving her an assuring smile.
“though, the bassist is a bit special, especially his mouth.” i reminded her. “but, i swear he's a good guy.”
i looked over to the traffic light and it turned green at the same time. i immediately returned to driving.
“oh, that's right. how did you meet them? the band, i mean.” she suddenly asked me.
“oh, it was a few months ago. my guitar's string snapped, so i went to buy new ones. and that's where i met riku.” i reminisced, but i saw in my peripheral vision how she tilted her head. “ah, the leader and also the drummer.”
“oh.” she sounded.
“he walked up to me and asked me if i wanted to be part of the band. at first, i thought he was messing with me, but he said he was serious. then he told me who the other ones were. yumi, the keyboard player, is a graduating senior in our university and mori, the bassist, i talked about earlier is a freshman.” i discussed it.
“i better remember their names.” she motivates herself and i smiled.
“thank you.” i muttered.
“hm? for what?” she asked, looking back at me.
“you said you don't really like talking and singing stuff like that, yet you still agreed. if ever you feel like you don't really want to do this and you're just feeling bad about your boyfriend, tell me okay?” i reminded her with a soft yet serious tone.
“don't be silly, eita. that was the past me. you, sachiko and our friends helped me overcome it and get out of my shell. you all have my thanks for that. also, i love music.” she said and i can sense that she's smiling from ear to ear right now.
she then laid her back on the backrest.
“now that you've mentioned university, wakatoshi never went to one, didn't he?” she said,
i peeked at her for a millisecond at the mention of his name. she's looking outside the window smiling tenderly.
“i— mhm... i think so…” i agreed.
i gripped the steering wheel tight. something inside me regretted bringing up the word ‘university’.
when we reached the restaurant where we'll meet the others, i immediately parked the car. i got out of it and went to open (y/n)'s door and i saw her expression again.
“hey. everything will be fine. i got you.” i said giving her a kiss on her temple.
we walked inside with connected hands and searched for my red-orange-headed leader. with his attention-getting hair, i easily spotted them, and it seemed like yumi saw me too as she waved her hands in our direction.
we headed towards them and mori immediately noticed our intertwined hands.
“okay, no. i refuse to have her as our main vocalist.” mori slammed the table with his curled fist.
“they just arrived?” yumi said.
i noticed how (y/n) tightened her hold, i looked at her and she looked so worried.
“come on, mori. don't be like that. it's already decided, anyways.” i said, but he just looked away huffing.
“take a seat, take a seat.” riku invited and we did.
we first waited for the food to come and when it did, we peacefully ate.
“riku, would you like to try this? it's my favourite! it's delicious too!” yumi offered the tempura and looked over to riku.
“really? then, i guess i'll try it then.” riku agreed and ate the tempura on yumi's chopsticks even though he had some on his plate.
watching this, mori leaned forward with vein's popping and steals riku's tempura, he didn't even notice. i looked at mori, smiling awkwardly.
“damn. damn. those two obviously like each other. i won't be surprised if sooner or later they'd get together. by the time that happens, i'll be this group's third wheel.” he whispered.
“just wait, you all. just wait till i get a lover.” he snickered to himself and i watched him. i just patted his back, supporting him.
after eating we all turned our heads to (y/n). we all smiled at her.
“welcome to the group, (y/n)!” we welcomed and clapped.
“t-thank you. i'll be in your care.” she replied shyly, having all our attention on her.
“okay…” riku spoke up, stealing the spotlight. we all looked at him and he cleared his throat. “now that we've secured another vocalist, we'll now face one of the important things.” he added.
“our band's name.” he continued.
“name, huh?” i sighed.
“let's not use too much of our brain power. i gotta save some for the upcoming semester tests.” mori groaned remembering it.
“ah! then, let's have our newest member pick our name!” yumi suggested, looking to (y/n) who got surprised by it.
“hmm... you're right. let's have (y/n) suggest our name as a welcoming gift!” riku agreed.
“welcome gift? it's more like pressure on the newcomer for me.” mori commented.
i glanced at (y/n) and her nervous smile. i leaned over to her and whispered.
“i can ask them to stop if you don't want to.” i told her.
“no, it's fine. it's fine. don't worry.” she assured me and i just flash a faint smile to her. i reached for her hand and clasped it with mine.
“also, most of the band's i know decided their band's name on a whim. they just found some things or some words and settled with that.” riku said.
“really?” i asked. “that's kind of amazing, haha.” i laughed.
“okay. ‘mori and the peasants.’” the guy said confidently that was reject it instantly.
“some also pulled names from their favourite things.” yumi added.
“favourite things?” riku repeated. he stared at the plate in front of him. “yumi, you said you like tempura, right?!” he sang, making yumi jolt.
“huh?! but, naming the band tempura... isn't it kinda weird?” she refuted and i just shook my head watching them.
i felt (y/n) asking for my attention by slightly tapping my hand, that's still intertwined together, with her thumb.
she moves closer to me and puts a hand to the side of her mouth to cover it from the others.
“hm?” i hummed, slightly smiling.
“if we name the band after your favourite food, it'll be "sushi", right?” she laughed.
“you're right,” i laughed with her, “but, it sounds weird.”
“right? if ever we get called to the stage with that name, it'll be like ‘everyone, let's give a round of applause for sushi!’ it sounds like a dog's name.” she added, making us laugh even more.
after laughing, i felt some sweat on my forehead. i let go of (y/n)'s hand to wipe it.
“no, really... we need to come up with a name. what about you mori, your favourite food?” riku asked.
“okonomiyaki.” mori answered swiftly.
“too long. eita?”
“sushi.” i answered, continuing to wipe my forehead.
“won't do. (y/n)?”
“uh... (y/n)?” riku repeated.
i looked at her, hearing riku repeat himself. she was looking at the waiter and their tray.
“hayashi rice…” she murmured, still looking at the tray.
i halted my movements.
“that!” the three shouted in sync, making her snap back to reality.
“huh?! what?!” she panicked as she put her hands in front of her.
“so, that's your favourite food, (y/n). let's go with that, but let's remove the rice and stick with hayashi.” riku said and ended the discussion.
“huh? that's not my fav— um…” she tried to tell them, but they weren't listening.
‘yeah, that's right. it's not her favourite food.’
‘it's not her favourite food.’
…
“it's yours, right?” semi said, playing with his cup.
“yeah. that's right.” ushijima confirmed. “but, i don't understand how that connects to you saying i've always had her heart. she just remembered my favourite dish, since you were talking about favourites.”
“well…”
…
i woke up to my phone's ringtone.
someone's calling.
‘at this time? tsk.’
i reached for my phone and looked at the name, it took a moment before my eyes adjusted to the screen's brightness.
‘(y/n)?’
i immediately got out of my bed and headed to the balcony. i cleared my throat first before answering.
“eita? sorry, did i wake you up?”
“no, no. don't worry, baby. i was awake.” i lied, my earlier annoyance gone already, just by the sound of her voice.
“really?” she asked, not really buying my lies.
“mhm. what's up?” i smiled as i stared at the landscape in front of my balcony.
“ah. no…”
there was silence.
‘oh, i see.’
“it's just... i love you.”
i smiled.
‘knew it.’
she called to tell me she loves me.
at first, i thought how sweet it was. how she called me just to say that...
but, i've connected the pattern. today, news about wakatoshi was featured on television.
so, this call...
‘it's to remind yourself that you ‘love’ me, don't you, (y/n)?’
she'll try to remind herself that she loves me.
“mhm. me too. i love you too, way too much.”
‘way too much.’
…
“it hurts thinking about how i'm not sure whether she loves me because she really loves me or just because i'm there,” semi uttered.
“but, it hurts even more to think that she's forcing herself. forcing herself to fight what her heart truly wants.” he added. he then chugged down his drink until the last drop.
“but, you know what? i was a big jerk back then, a real jerk.” he groaned.
“what do you mean?” ushijima asked, furrowing his brows.
“because, even though i knew about it, i chose not to say anything and guess what? it hurts even more. it hurts so much, i wanted to cry. how our conversations always drift about you without her noticing, how she always perks up whenever she hears your name and how... how i can see that i'm not even a match against you. how i know how much she loves you. how my mind questions whether whenever she mutters ‘i love you’, does she see me or you?” semi was looking down, but his voice cracked in the last sentence.
“but, still i was a jerk... even though i knew all of that. i did not let go. i love her too much to let her go and it only causes both of us pain. i let her cut it because i can't do it. in the end, not only did i make her constantly believe that she loves me, but i also kept her from doing what her heart wants. to be with the one she truly loves.” he continued as he wiped his tears that were threatening to fall.
it was silent as he did that.
“you were not a jerk,” ushijima spoke up, making semi look at him with wide eyes. “you only did that because being with her is what makes you happy. you are not a jerk for that. but, that happiness is also what brought you so much sadness and pain.”
semi just stared at him speechless. he expected him to be mad, not only did he cause you nothing, but so many sufferings, he also once stole you from him.
“semi, i am not good with words, but i'll do my best since you are my friend. i am grateful to you. you helped (y/n) what she is today.” ushijima confessed.
“what?” semi asked, his eyes widening.
“(y/n), she started liking music, because of you. you introduced her to the band. also, you're always beside her in your whole career as bandmates and she can do what her heart wants to. music. even though it's not about love and being with her, you still helped her in doing another thing her heart desires. i thank you for that.” ushijima said and bowed.
seeing his friend, whom he once saw as a rival, not only in volleyball but also when it comes to love, thanked him so sincerely. it's like something heavy was lifted off his chest. he sighed deeply.
“thank you…” he replied delightfully and ushijima fixed his position.
“also, about the career…”
“yeah. it seems like it's tumbling down.” ushijima said.
“do you know who did this?” semi asked and he nodded.
“yeah. i am quite sure it's aika.” ushijima said and clenched his fist. “i'm on my way to her earlier when we bumped into each other.”
“actually... i talked to her the other day.” semi said that got ushijima's whole attention.
“when the incident happened, i saw her watching from the side, but she immediately ran off when she saw me. i followed but lost sight of her. so, the following day i went to talk to her. i told her to stop it and tell the people the truth, but... she threatened that she'll disclose our past relationship to the public.” semi said.
“is that a bad thing?” ushijima asked.
“no, even though we broke up before we debuted and we agreed to keep it a secret as ordered by the company, there are still people who saw us together. like our classmates and friends back then, so it’s really not a secret to others.” he explained.
“i see.”
“but, that's not all what suzuki said at that time. actually, we met even before the incident happened. she told me a plan that will have you and (y/n) separate, so i can have (y/n) to myself and she'll have you.” semi said looking on the floor trying to remember that day, but he suddenly felt shivers, only to look up at ushijima glaring at him.
“i declined! i declined! i promise!” he immediately told him, calming down the ace.
“but, it seems like she had someone take a picture of us talking. she told me that she'll say we were together in that plan if i ever go in her way. i got scared that maybe (y/n) would believe it, so i kept quiet.” semi placed his hands on his knees and gripped his bottoms tightly.
“you know how much (y/n) trusts you, she would not believe that ” ushijima stated the obvious that only made semi laugh half-heartedly and put his fingers through his scalp and pulled his hair.
“right? i'm such an idiot for doing that! that's why i wanted to talk to her and apologize and provide comfort too but you were already there. beating me again.” semi chuckled.
“this issue... even if i don't do anything, it won't affect my work that much, since my talent and play is what i needed, but for her, this is a major problem, since publicity is just as important as talent. of course, she was scared. but, she's more scared that she'll drag you and the band down with her. the damage would've been light if she was alone facing this, but she blames herself for bringing you guys into this mess. i'm at fault here too, that's why i apologize to you and your bandmates too.” ushijima said.
“but, she worked so hard to be where is today, so i won't forgive those who ruined it for her.” he firmly stated, bringing a confident smile on semi's face.
“you're right.” he said and then they both stood. “i'll head to the practice room and talk to them. also, see what we can do without breaking our supervisor's order, not to meddle with the issue.” semi said,
“okay, then i'll take my leave.” he excused himself and walked out of the door.
watching ushijima, he remembered the conversation he once had with sachiko.
…
“so? why did you call my little (y/n)?”
“nothing.”
“huh? what 'nothing'?”
“no, i was gonna ask if she had already eaten.”
“huh?”
she sighed. i heard the chair getting dragged, so sachiko must've got out of her chair and headed to the veranda.
“eita... why are you like this?” sachiko gets straight to the point, making me laugh.
“(y/n) told me before that she was the one who ended it, but if you still love her why don't you just, like say it to her face?”
“we both know we'll only get rejected if i do that.” i laughed. “but, i guess i look desperate to still be connected with her to other people.”
“huh? are you not?” she asked.
“of course, not... okay, maybe just a bit. also, i trust her.” i said.
“what do you mean?”
“i trust that she chose the right man to fall in love with. i know he'll treat her well, protect her and will support her. i'll believe in the guy she chose, even if it's not me.”
“what? so, you do still love her.”
“maybe, maybe not.”
“oh, stop making things complicated.”
“hahaha. i'll be going now, say hi to tendou for me. bye.”
…
‘she did choose the right man.’
semi thought to himself before leaving and calling a taxi.
‘i hope i get over it already.’ he thought, yet he’s fully aware that the larger part of him knew he didn't, no, couldn’t even if he wanted to.
not when his relationship with you was his greatest love, but apparently it’s not the same for you. it seems like he would first need to work on accepting that, before opening his heart for another person.
to be continued…
if you're interested for the next one, the whole story is already available on my patreon.
if you'd like to support me, you can also check here!
❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
i hope you enjoyed it!
“coach, i'm leaving.” ushijima said stealing the attention of coach suzaku who's talking to the innkeeper and the woman beside him who seems to be his assistant.
coach suzaku looked at ushijima ready to leave. the innkeeper saw him and they both bowed repeatedly.
“please accept our apologies for what happened.” they apologized.
“no, no. it's an accident. we can't really do anything about that.” coach suzaku said. “even though it's not a typhoon, the rain was pretty harsh, and even got the whole town's electricity cut off for almost three days.”
“we're really sorry. if only the radio was working, we would've learned that news earlier, but it was stacked for a long time, it stopped working. we're really sorry.” the innkeeper apologized again.
“mhm.” ushijima hummed acknowledging their apology. the door slid open and there was hoshiumi and kageyama.
“oi, ushiwaka. the taxi's here.” hoshiumi announced. ushijima then turned to his coach.
“i'm leaving, coach.” he said once again, his coach nodded at him.
“are you sure you don't want to just take the same flight as us? we'll be leaving this evening too.” he asked. ushijima swung his backpack on his shoulder.
“no. i need to fix this matter fast.” he briefly muttered and walked out of the door. his two teammates sent him off with a wave.
while the taxi transports him to the airport, he glanced at his phone again.
‘read’
but, still no response...
he turned his phone off and looked outside.
‘i'll fix this.’
••• (few hours earlier) •••
you let out a groan as you heard knocks on your door, the reason you were woken up, but you didn't answer nor open it.
you only slept for one and a half hour.
after you stretch your arm silently, you just curl up your body again. you hugged the comforter tightly.
the knocking stopped.
“(y/n), i'm leaving... i've prepared breakfast for you. come out and eat, at least a bite... you haven't eaten since yesterday.” sachiko's voice was weak from her usual voice.
you didn't reply. you just tucked yourself to the cover even more.
“(y/n), we're all worried. satori too, i'm worried too.” she says with a shaky voice.
you shut your eyes tightly and let out a shuddery sigh.
“...sorry.” you whispered.
“i'm off to work. see you later.”
you heard footsteps gradually walking away and then you heard the door click. you let out another sigh.
the director told you to take a break the other day, but that doesn't mean that the band's schedules and gig were cancelled. they still continue our activities, while also facing the criticisms that i caused.
you’re not even sure if you can look at them in the eyes the next time you see them again. not after they got roped into the things they never did.
the director's friend, the booking agent, also told you to try your best and not to open any social media apps. but, now and then... you find yourself reaching for your phone, tempted to open those which shouldn't be opened.
and in the end, you always let the temptation get the best of you and tap on the icon.
“bro seriously why does this (y/n) have to do that?”
“girl just ruined things for her bandmates”
“well, we can't expect good things from a daughter of an ex-convict.”
“i hope ushiwaka's fiancée is alright. her boyfriend is such a jerk, letting himself get seduced.”
“and here i was thinking about supporting her when i saw their video.”
“well, pray for me 'cause i can't believe i saved up money to buy their upcoming album. guess, i'll just buy killz's album instead.”
the more you read those comments, the more you wanted to apologize to them...
‘to my bandmates, to my dad.’
your fingers then moved to your messages. you saw the thousands of messages left by your friends, but one message caught your attention. it was a message from your dad.
- (y/n), are you okay?
- if it’s too much for you to reply, you don’t have to do it, okay?
- i’m just sorry that things have gotten worse because of me.
- i didn’t mean for them to find out about my past.
- sorry that your father’s an ex-convict. i didn’t want you to bear the shame of having such a parent.
- don’t listen to them, okay?
- i’m here even if you think no one is on your side.
- sorry again for being an embarrassment.
your eyes teared up as you read his message, your hold on your phone, slowly loosening.
“why are you the one apologizing...?” you uttered to yourself.
‘i should be the one apologizing… you just got a job after weeks of doing your best to find a job after being released… but, because of the scandal… they learned about your background and fired you immediately… now, you have to search for another job… all because of me…’
“why are you apologizing…? please don’t…” you sobbed.
your eyes blurred as you accidentally clicked on the hayashi group chat. they were actively checking on you, even when you never reply.
‘after all the hard work we've put into making the album…’
‘the hellish practices, the pressuring recording…’
‘after dad finally changed and promised to be a better father…’
‘if only i was careful, this wouldn't happen! the band wouldn't be affected!’
‘if only i hadn't gone out that day, they wouldn't have that picture!’
‘if only i was not wakatoshi's g—!’
the sound of a notification coming in broke your wandering thoughts. you haven't realized your phone fell off the bed. you sat on your ass and reached for it. when you flip your phone, your eyes expand.
‘why just now? all these days, i've waited for you.’
‘why just now, wakatoshi?’
‘i'm coming home.’
…
as soon as the plane landed, ushijima made sure to send you a message, but just as he expected, it was just left on read. he immediately called for a taxi, he asked the driver to drive him to your place, he's not even dropping off at his place. he didn't have a lot of things he brought, in the first place, so no need to go there.
when he arrived there, he headed to your floor and stood in front of the door. he knocked three times, but no one answered.
he thought that maybe you were not there, but to make sure he tried calling your phone.
he leaned his ears on the door, and even though it's faint, he's sure he can hear your ringtone inside. he ended the call. he pressed the doorbell two times.
you didn't hear his knock, but now you can hear the doorbell.
‘is he here already?’
you sat on the edge of your bed and weakly opened the door to your bedroom. you were about to walk and touch the doorknob, but you stopped.
‘should i open it? what will happen if i do? nothing will change. no one can change it.’
“(y/n), you're there, right?” ushijima predicted. you froze at what he said and snorted.
you then held the knob and turned it. ushijima was greeted by his ungroomed girlfriend. you led him inside. ushijima didn't comment on how you look, or more like he didn't pay attention to your bed head and chapped lips.
when you reached the kitchen, you saw the food sachiko was talking about. now that you've seen it, hunger finally hits you. you held your stomach and took the food to the microwave oven to heat it. ushijima watched you do it in silence, but still decided to talk.
“are you just about to eat?” he asks. you can only hum at his question.
“you seem weak.” he said.
‘i know.’
“it looks like you're not properly taking care of yourself.”
‘i know!’
“are you thinking about the news?”
“of course, i am!” you slammed the table in front of you. the noise it made, made you realize what you had just done. “i-i'm sorry.” you apologized.
“everything will be fine, (y/n).” you looked up at him with squinted eyes, hearing that.
“what do you mean?” you firmly ask.
“i'll fix this. leave it to me.” he assures, staring straight at you, but the next thing you did left him wondering.
you laughed.
“sorry, but what will you do? tell them that it's not true?” you said as you walked to him.
“wakatoshi, who would believe that? of course, the people will say that it's fabricated just to cover it up!” you stood in front of him.
he raised his hands and placed them on your shoulders. “everything's fine. it will work out.”
“‘everything's fine. everything will work out.' stop giving me that crap!” you shouted. you flicked his hands off of you.
“everything's ruined, everything's going downhill! that's what it is right now!” you glared up at him. emotions that are pent up inside are suddenly bursting out.
should you be taking it out at him? you're too drowned in your emotions to think about that.
“stop with the lies! i already know the damage i inflicted on the band's reputation and image!” you said, your voice slowly starting to raise without noticing.
“my dad's records are being looked into! they're exaggerating and pulling him into this too! i don't even know how they learned about it! i thought it's confidential!” you continue to stare at him.
“everything's ruined and it's all because of me!” you crashed out, your fingers going to your head and started to tug on your hair in frustration.
ushijima took a step closer, his brows furrowing in concern as you physically torment yourself without even realizing. he reached out to try and take your hand away from your head.
“from what i can see, none of these is your fault. this is completely min—” he tried to affirm you, but he's still calm even though you cut him off, halting his movements before he could even stop what you’re doing in your hair.
“if i was thinking about the consequences of my actions, i would've been more careful!”
“(y/n), calm down. please—” he tried to put a hand on your shoulder, but you slapped his hand away. he widened his eyes in your actions, but it was quickly replaced by a guilt-ridden look.
“do not blame yourself—” he tried to talk, only to be drowned by your words.
“if only i was thinking thoroughly of my decisions, it would've been prevented!”
“if i was careful, it wouldn't have happened!”
you stared straight into his eyes as tears you were holding back since yesterday finally got free.
“if only... if only i was not your girlfriend.” you whispered, your mind so stressed, worried, fatigued, and worked up, lost track of what's coming out of your mouth.
there was silence.
ushijima stared at you.
he didn't do anything, he didn't move.
not because he decided not to, but because he's not sure how to act.
the pang in his chest is the only thing he can think of, so as your words repeatedly flash in his ears. the pain only intensified as he saw the look on your face.
he heard you sniffle. he clasped his hands tightly.
he opened his mouth, attempting to say something, but words won't come out.
“do you really feel that way?” he wanted to ask, but he’s not sure whether it’s the right moment to do so.
he felt like his throat was dry, even though he had just drank. he just closed it again and just stood there in front of you.
when your tears dropped on your hands. you finally noticed that you were crying. you brought your hands to your face and wiped it even when there's still some that are coming out.
you turned your heel, wanting another glass of water, you tried to get away from him, without even looking at his face.
but, as expected, he got a hold of your hand.
you didn't fight back, you stayed like that for a few seconds. you don't want to look at him, not after you just lashed out at him and you can't even remember what you just said to him.
you can't recall it until he spoke.
“do you really regret becoming my girlfriend?”
in the end, he still asked. his words are almost like he's whispering, but you heard it loud and clear. and you finally remembered what you'd said to him.
you finally turned your head to him. and your heart almost stopped at the most despaired expression you've ever seen from him.
freeing your wrist from his hold, you held his hand with yours. you shook your head desperately, panicking and everything.
“no— i didn't mean— it's not true! it's not true! it was the heat of the moment! i promise i didn't mean that! i love you, i really do!” you said as you wrapped your hands around him and cried in his chest.
even though he was surprised and delighted to hear that, he still got worried seeing you cry again. he placed one hand on your waist and the other stroked your hair, while he kissed your head.
“i'm sorry, i let out my frustrations on you. i'm sorry for saying those things. i'm sorry. i swear i don't feel that way—” you mumbled over and over again against his chest.
“shh, shh.” he calmed you down. “it's fine, no one's upset. i believe you. it's okay.” he said as he kissed your head again.
you breathed in shakily and exhaled the same way.
“i understand. it’s okay, it’s okay.” he hushed, running his hand on your hair. “but, please…” he said, his voice minimally trembling, you almost missed it.
“toshi?” you hiccuped as you tried to look up at him, but he just embraced you tighter as he let out a shaky breath.
“please don’t say that again…” he uttered, dipping his head down to your neck. “don’t ever say you wish you were never my girlfriend, my woman… even when you’re mad or we’re fighting…” he murmured against your neck, his hold on you tight like you were his lifeline.
your heart ached knowing your words hurt the man you loved.
how your words made this usual stoic, pleading on your arms, asking you to not say words you unconsciously said in the heat of the moment. you knew it was stupid to lose control like that.
“i’m sorry. i didn’t realize what i was saying. things have been so hard, i kept trying to think back to when and where it started.” you explained, “but, i don’t really think i shouldn’t have been your girlfriend.” you added, wrapping your hands around him.
“no, you don’t have to apologize. just pro…” he trailed off, but then he took a deep breath. “just promise me you won’t do it again. that you won’t say those words unless you actually meant it.” he said, nuzzling his nose on the crevice of your neck.
you nodded. “i promise.”
“good.” he said, finally pulling his head away. “that’s good to hear.” he smiled, chuckling a bit as he saw how you sniffle cutely, despite actually looking like a total mess if it was in the eyes of other people.
“don’t laugh.” you glared, but it has no effect compared to the snot about to drip from your nose.
ushijima pulled out a tissue from his bag and helped you clean up. once you've calmed down, you let go of him and wiped the remaining tears on your face.
he examined your face for a moment. he then took your hands in his, bringing it to his lips.
“wakatoshi?” you called in confusion, watching him close his eyes as he breathed in the scent from your hands.
“i can see how much this affected you, but please, leave it to me. i promise i'll fix this. please believe in me.” he promised and you slowly nodded.
“and i'll make sure that this time my promise won't be broken.” he added.
*ping*
you both looked at the microwave oven hearing it went off and you remembered you were hungry and wanted some food.
“let's eat together?” you invited, smiling up at him. he delightedly accepted it.
you two then walked to get some food together. after eating, you both moved to your room and ushijima spoke up.
“i need to go somewhere after this.” he said, standing by the door. you immediately looked at him.
“oh, okay.” you replied. you sit on your bed and put the cover on your lower body. you yawned. you noticed him looking over you. “sorry, it's just i didn't sleep properly yesterday, no— i guess i can say, today.” you said smiling sheepishly.
he walked closer to you and asked if he could get on the bed. you agreed. you watched him, went around and laid next to you. he then patted the space beside him and you smiled, figuring out what he wanted.
you laid on his arm, while he just looked straight ahead, the ceiling, to be precise. you put one hand on his chest, trying to make yourself comfortable.
“sorry, wakatoshi. our reunion didn't start well.” you said, eyes starting to get heavy.
“don't worry about that.” he shortly answered. “i’m content with having you in my arms again like this.”
“you said you have to leave, right? you can leave once i'm sleeping already, okay? it's fine... i won't be alone once i wake up... sachiko will be home by that time, i also need to... talk and apologize to her for making her worry.” you uttered, stopping mid-sentence because of sleepiness and he just hummed in response.
but, before you completely drift off to sleep, you gently turned his head towards you and kissed him. “thank you.” you smiled.
he returned your smile and kissed your forehead and then your lips. he then wrapped his arms around you securely. “sweet dreams.”
you can only hum in response. your eyelids grew heavier every second that passed. his arms hold you firmly, but carefully as you rest your head on his chest. listening to his steady heartbeat brought a smile to your face as you completely went to sleep.
it only has been thirty minutes since you went to sleep and he can already hear your soft snores. he wanted to stay like that, holding you in his arms, for a little longer, but he needs to do something important.
with one last kiss, he carefully pulled his arms out and stood silently.
“i'm heading out.” he whispered to you, as he kissed you softly in the cheeks. “sleep tight.”
he walked to the door as quietly as possible. he looked at you one more time, before closing the door and walking out. he grabbed his things and headed for the door.
when he opened it and his brows raised slightly at who he saw.
“semi.” ushijima uttered, his surprise barely even noticeable.
to be continued…
if you're interested for the next one, the whole story is already available on my patreon.
if you'd like to support me, you can also check here!
❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
i hope you enjoyed it!
sorry guys! i thought it was still on queue, turns out the date was wrong. my bad!
“we're about to start our training for today.”
“it's raining hard here.”
“good luck with your performance today. i'll be watching it from my phone in my free time.”
you smiled at your screen reading ushijima's message.
right now, he should be busy keeping up with the training, but he took his time to give you encouragement for the show.
you replied to him saying thank you and to be careful with the training. you put your phone in your bag immediately after.
you looked at the door, hearing it open.
“hey, 20 minutes 'til we're up on the stage the staff announced.” semi said, while standing by the door, still holding the knob.
“mhm! don't go ahead. wait for me!” you told him as you ran in his direction.
“always am.” he muttered to himself.
you looked at him, smiling while he led the way to your other bandmates with a big smile.
when you left the waiting room and reached backstage, you saw the couple getting excited over something. “what's up with the two?” you asked mori who looks so done with them as usual.
“those two! they're so embarrassing!” he said, crossing his arms on his chest.
“why?” semi asked.
“see that five people over there?” higo said, pointing subtly at the people facing their backs at you on the corner. you and semi nodded. “they're the ‘killz’. you know the band that got famous from their debut album last month. the vocalist is already a veteran and has been promoting solo all his career, but he just formed a group now. they're performing here also.” he added whispering.
“really?!” you amazedly said, while semi just had his mouth forming an 'o' with his mouth.
“and then they are acting so unprofessional. getting overly enthusiastic seeing them.” mori huffed. you looked at his face.
“you look just as excited as them, sir.” you told him.
while talking you heard an applaud coming from the audience. the band next to you started moving.
“seems like they're next.” semi noted.
“and we'll be performing after them.” higo said.
while riku and yumi were being stopped by mori from running to killz, you and semi warmed up your throat and vocal.
rumbling unintelligible words and sounds to prepare your voice. at first, semi was watching you and matching your voice, but his eyes soon caught how some people were suspiciously looking at you, but would immediately look away once they met his eyes.
“woo!”
“that was amazing!”
all of your attention was filched hearing the cheers from the spectators in the front. after that you heard someone talking, saying thank you and hoping for their support and you immediately knew it'll be minutes or seconds before your band steps on the stage and downbeat.
within minutes of setting up and tuning, riku asked you to gather around. you four walked and stopped in front of his drum set.
he closed his hands and extended them to the center. mori then opened his palms and wrapped riku's fist with his hands.
“i win. paper beats rock.” yumi immediately slapped his hands lightly, while you and semi laughed.
“let's do this!” riku exclaimed after you all bumped your fists together.
“yeah!” you said in chorus.
the lights went out and you stood holding the stand with one hand and the microphone with the other. you closed your eyes and took a deep breath.
‘it's okay, (y/n).’
“hm?” you looked at your side when you felt a hand on your hair. “what's up, eita?”
“don't be nervous, just think that wakatoshi will be watching this and you'll be able to perform your best.” he muttered. you squint your eyes a bit, pouting and giving him a suspicious look.
“how are you sure about that?”
“i just know.” he shrugged and went back to his position.
“with their impressive and captivating performance that made one of their videos quickly circulate the internet just recently, they're here to show and prove that they are even more talented than what you think they are, here is the amazing band of hayashi!”
as soon as the emcee finished speaking and the cover was removed, loud cheers and applause almost caught you all off guard and you almost didn't hear riku's signal with his drumsticks and the sounds from your in-ear. you managed to hear it faintly, thankfully, and you were able to sing comfortably to the tune.
but, even if you think everything is going well and everything is perfect, somehow you feel like something's off.
there are a lot of people who are jamming with you, feeling the song, but very few people who just stand there looking and glaring at the stage.
it's not the first time you meet people who don't like the ones performing, but there's something different.
‘maybe they're fans of other bands.’
you shrugged it off and focused on the people who are having fun. you looked at the girl in the front and saw her holding a banner with the band's name. you walked to her and put the mic to her mouth. she happily held it and sang every lyric to the song.
feeling satisfied and delighted, you patted her head and went back to your spot.
“everyone! let's scream our lungs out! yeah!” you pumped the audience and they automatically responded by cheering and shouting, exactly as what you said.
after singing two songs alone, one song with semi, and one encore begged by the audience, your band's set finally finished.
“what a fantastic performance from hayashi! the crowd seemed to love it!” a different emcee than earlier muttered as he walked to the center, while the crowd clapped.
you gathered at the center, as riku walked to the side of the host.
“um, thank you for being a wonderful audience, also thank you so much for the ones who organized this concert and allowed us to perform here and showcase our band's talent.” he started, looking at the person and people he's talking about. “also, we're working on our album and will be releasing it soon too, please support us!” he said as you all bowed, along with him.
you waved at the spectators while waiting for the signal that you'll get off the stage. riku walked back to you guys, subtly looking to the side for the signal, while he still waved to the audience.
“but! before they get off the stage, how about some words from hayashi's vocalist, ms. (y/n)?” the emcee said out of nowhere.
‘huh? what? a speech? i wasn't told about this!’
you anxiously walked to the front and looked at the host with wide eyes, but he just smirked and huffed.
‘what was that?’
he handed you another microphone and you placed it in front of your lips.
‘what should i say?’
‘ah, that's right. our album…’
“um... everyone, thank you—”
“harlot!” a voice from at the back of the crowd.
you looked at the person where the voice came from and she was glaring fiercely at you.
you suddenly felt someone on your side, you looked up and saw riku, smiling as usual.
“pay no attention to them. it's okay.” he whispered and placed a hand on your shoulder. you nodded and tried to focus looking at the front.
“thank you so much for today, please support our albu—”
“why are we going to support a slut?!” another voice said. the people started murmuring to each other. they looked back at you and the people who shouted.
‘what are they saying? do haters really have to go that far? calling me a harlot and slut. ignore them. ignore them.’
“our album—” you were about to continue, when someone interjected that you didn’t expect from his job.
“huh? what do those people mean by that, (y/n)? harlot? slut?” the host suddenly leaned towards you, his voice might sound like he's asking, but for you and your bandmates, it's like he's pressing it on you.
“no— i don't kno—” he suddenly let out a loud gasp.
“don't tell me... did you seduce and steal someone's man?” with pressuring eyes, he muttered it on the mic, and the murmuring got louder.
“yeah! she stole ushijima wakatoshi from his fiancé!”
“that's right! she took advantage of her sudden fame and seduced him! what a slut!”
“from his fiancé?”
“oh, you mean that girl who always pops out of nowhere whenever ushiwaka is greeting his fans?”
“yeah, i think that's who they are talking about. isn't she always by his side for years?”
“ushiwaka really threw away all those for her?”
“really?”
“that's fucked up.”
“she doesn't look like someone who'd do that, though. steal someone's man.”
“well, you know what they said ‘don't judge the book by its cover’, right?”
some of the people didn't even bother to lower their voices, allowing you to hear some of what they were saying.
“(y/n), what do you say about this? is this true? did you really steal ushijima wakatoshi from his fiancé? did you seduce him? are you going to use him as a stepping stone? for yourself?” the host once again asked.
riku then asked for the mic you're holding, and you immediately gave it to him. he exchanged positions with you. him beside the host this time.
“sorry, my friend has never done that. there is no evidence of th—” he said strongly.
“evidence? oh, you mean this?” the emcee confidently said and pointed to the screen behind you. you all looked at it and your eyes widened.
‘it's our picture from last time. from the lavish restaurant. from where there were a lot of his fans waiting outside... we went out holding hands…’
you immediately looked away. feeling guilty, for unknown reasons.
your eyes accidentally landed on the girl you engaged with earlier. you watched how she slowly lowered the banner of your band she's holding, her head looking at the ground.
your eyes expanded even more, you could feel your eyes getting watery, but fought it to not fall.
she then got lost in the crowd, her head still held down.
‘wha– that's right, eita—!’
you looked behind you, seeing mori and yumi asking the staff to take down the photo displayed on the screen, but no semi.
‘huh? where is he?’
some staff were persistently telling the host to stop, but he was just ignoring them. riku saw them and looked at higo. higo was asking you all to get off the stage with his mouth.
“(y/n), let's go.” riku said, dragging you lightly, as the crowd started booing.
you were right about feeling something off. you shouldn't have ignored it.
…
as soon as the event finished, you went home. everything happened so suddenly, your brain can't process what's happening, you thought it'll pass but you were wrong. that it happened because they wanted to ruin the event for your band. only for that event.
the next morning, you got woken up by sachiko looking at you terrified.
“what's wrong?” you asked her worried.
she just pointed out in the living room, she dragged you and stood in front of the television. you rubbed your eyes trying to see more clearly, but the words flashing in the screen was enough to make your eyes go wide open.
“volleyball superstar and japan's canon, ushijima wakatoshi, found cheating on his fiancee! with solid proof and photographs!”
“aspiring singer (l/n) (y/n), of the band group hayashi is the suspected third party?!”
“wh...?” words won't come out of your mouth.
“can't they provide proper news?! she's not the third party! she. is. his. girlfriend!” sachiko shouted at the screen. “why haven't wakatoshi told them about your guy's relationship?”
“i-i don't know.” you softly muttered.
“can you ask him now and clear this stupid misunderstanding?” she said and you just nodded, staring at her looking so unfocused.
you remembered you turned off your phone last night and you'll just open it right now.
as soon as it got connected to the internet, you both flinched hearing the multiple and continuous sounds of your notification going off and it's all from your social media apps.
you looked at sachiko, asking her with your eyes whether opening those is the right thing, but examining her face you can tell even her don't know what to do.
you closed your eyes and took a deep breath.
you shook your head and instead of clicking the social media applications, you clicked the messaging app and went to your thread with ushijima.
you saw that all the messages were only left on 'sent'. it might be because he turned off his phone or something, but not having a response from him made you feel worse.
you glanced at the television once again, holding your phone tightly. the screen showed yesterday's event. sachiko looks at your face and she swears she once again saw the expression she least wanted to see plastered on your face.
“let's–” her sentence was interrupted when your ringtone went off again, but this time it's a call.
“it's higo.” you muttered, looking at your phone. you slowly tapped the answer button.
“hey, (y/n). have you seen the news?” he asked on the other line, the silence you gave him is enough to answer his question. you heard him sigh deeply.
“of course, the guys’ above got the news too. they're demanding a talk with you and the others.”
as soon as the phone call ended, you readied yourself and when you got out of your room, you saw sachiko waiting for you. you looked at her surprised.
“let's go?” she asked, smiling.
no explanation is needed. sachiko, who's always been there for you, will surely not leave you in this.
thinking about that, made you chuckle.
how good it feels knowing there's someone i can rely on and will not leave me when things get rough. thank you.
as you both got on the train, she checked if your camouflage was perfect. she held your hand and led you to where there's fewer people boarding. she told you to sit and she'll stand in front of you to cover you.
you got a seat next to a group of students, happily talking to each other. you anxiously sat down in the end.
while travelling, sachiko dared not to say anything. she thinks she might trigger something and decides not to stress you even more. you stared at your phone, hopelessly waiting for ushijima to reply to you.
“look at this! look at this!” you heard the girl next to you say, asking for her other friend's attention.
“ushijima wakatoshi is a cheater!” you flinched hearing the name of the person you were just thinking about.
“huh? really?!”
“um, let's see... there's a photograph of who's the third party. wait.”
“huh? isn't that (l/n) (y/n) from hayashi?”
you swallowed a huge lump in your throat, it's just liquid, yet it feels like you swallowed a big rock. you lowered your head. sachiko was carefully listening to them and what they're saying.
“ah, you mean that band that went viral?”
“yeah, they were amazing, but... they're just starting to rise, yet their vocalist already has a scandal.”
“i mean, scandals aren't news to artists, but this is too fast.”
“i'm sure they won't stay in the industry for that long.”
‘eh…?’
‘am i– is my band's reputation getting dirtied because of me?’
you grip onto sachiko's hand, lowering your head even more, shutting your eyes tightly.
‘just what did i do?’
‘that's right. i abruptly got into a relationship without even thinking about them. without thinking of the consequences!’
‘i knew aika was wakatoshi’s front fiance, but i never really gave it a thought!’
‘i'm so selfish.’
‘and now, my selfishness is biting me back and it's affecting my friends.’
‘what should i do?’
‘oh. that's right, it's all because i became wakatoshi's girlf–’
“eh? for real?!” the girl's voice had you snapped out of your thoughts.
“look at this!”
“what? what?”
“i looked at the comments of that article i read, look at this.”
they all looked over to the girl's phone and they all gasped in chorus. it made you and sachiko curious about what they read.
“gosh, her father is an ex-convict?!”
you hastily look in their direction, sachiko thought about stopping your head, but it was too late. your movements got their attention and they looked back at you, but you remembered that you're in disguise.
thanks to the sunglasses and mask sachiko bought for you, you're almost unrecognisable to someone who doesn't really know you.
to get away, you just faked a cough and tried to scroll something on your phone.
‘he's got nothing to do with this! why do they need to drag him?!’
even if sachiko wanted to join the conversation and tell them to shut up, she knew that it would be meaningless. as soon as the train arrived at your destination, she pulled you lightly to the door the moment it opened.
without wasting any time, you two walked to the agency's building and both jaws dropped seeing the scene.
media reporters, journalists and camera's filled the entrance of the building. whether their goal is to interview you or maybe the other artists of your agency, you just know you had to avoid them. you dragged sachiko to another way to go inside.
nervous and anxious, you pressed the button on the floor where you'll be meeting with higo and the others.
as soon as you step inside, you can immediately feel the heavy atmosphere filling the air.
“hey…” you greeted, they all looked at you. yumi smiled at you, but it didn't erase the mood.
“wait here. i'll go tell them you've arrived.” higo excused himself. you walked closer to them, removing your disguise.
“eita, where?” sachiko looked around, searching for her friend.
“he said he can't come, but he didn't say why.” yumi answered.
“(y/n), let's go.” higo called and you made your way to the door.
every step is heavy. you're not sure what to expect once you go in there.
but, one thing's for sure.
this conversation will be a long, heavy, and serious one.
once you’ve arrived in front of the office, higo gives you a reassuring smile, before knocking.
“come in.” you heard someone say. “good morning.” he said as soon as you two entered.
“g-good morning.” you salute.
there are five people, including you and higo inside the room.
“take a seat.” the director pointed at the seat in front of him. you did as he said, with higo standing beside you. “now, let's get to the point. (y/n), i'm sure you know why you're called here.”
“yes, sir.” you answered silently.
“then, that would save us time. why are you in a relationship with ushiwaka?” he asked. you avoided his eyes.
‘why? because i like him.’ you sighed.
“recently we ran to each other multiple times after cutting off our contacts and we've reconciled and got closer—” you started to explain, ready to receive a long and harsh lecture.
“that's good.” he interrupted.
“huh?” you looked at him confusedly.
“(y/n), listen. the company i founded is for artists to cultivate and show people their talents and potential. solely for that.” he started. you wondered why he's telling you this.
“i know, sir.” you replied. he then eyed the person behind you.
“higo, they're the first ones you’ve ever managed, right?” he asked.
“that's correct, sir.” higo answered calmly.
“then, why is this happening in your band? twice already, higo. are you sure you're doing your job?” his voice raised very slightly at the end, making his assistant give him a side-eye for a moment.
you looked to your side and your eyes widened seeing higo bow properly to the director.
“i apologize. it really might've happened because i lack the ability to manage them. i am to blame.” higo spoke sincerely.
you moved your body to face him, your hands wanted to reach higo and tell him that he shouldn't apologize for any of these things because he wasn't an effective manager, in fact– he's the best anyone could ask for.
you wanted to tell him to stand straight. not to apologize. he'd done nothing wrong. he's outstanding in what he does.
‘don't apologize. please. it's my fault, everything is.’
‘i'm dragging too many people in this.’
you heard your boss sigh. you faced him.
“no! this is–”
“higo, fix your posture.” he ordered that higo immediately follow. “sorry about that. i didn't mean that sorry.” he apologized.
‘huh?’
“that's right. you're so mean to higo.” the fifth person in the room suddenly spoke from his seat. he stood up and walked next to higo. “higo is the best manager we've found, don't go making him doubt his talent.” he puts an arm on higo's shoulder, scolding the director, which he's working for too.
“oh, shut up.” the director said, exhausted.
“don't worry, higo, (y/n). that guy is just stressed from all his work, so forgive him. he's actually very loving and caring of his talents and staff.” the booking agent, who's also a close friend of your boss, guaranteed. his friend just rolled his eyes and turned his chair around.
“now, now. let's not worry about him for now.” he then stood in front of us. the director's assistant continued to write. “so, you know guys... we've been working for quite some time now, i'm sure you know what i do, right?” he uttered, smiling.
“yes, you book our events and shows, right?” you answered.
“well, the thing is ever since you guys went viral, i was overjoyed! every time i will book you to a show, i didn't even need to tell them what you guys can do, just hearing that you're the viral ones was enough for them to agree.” he sang delightedly.
“that's why what i and that guy are worried about is... the bookings are decreasing. rapidly. they wanted to cancel your appearance at their show and place because of the issue.” he confessed with a straight face.
your brows furrowed in fear and guilt.
‘i'm really affecting the band.’
you clenched your fist tightly, you can feel your nails digging into your skin. you bit your lip and swallowed your saliva.
“did ushiwaka say anything?” he asked and you shook your head.
“he's not responding to my messages.” you answered and noticed your low energy.
“(y/n).” he called for you. “riku and yumi.”
“yes? what about them?” you asked.
“did you know why we're not against the relationship?” you shook your head. “it's because they promised to hide their relationship when there's a camera. but, also because of that, their fans are openly flirting with them in front of the person they're in a relationship with.”
‘that's right. riku and yumi never interacted with each other in front of the media, the same way they talk off-cam.’
“maybe you never felt it when the band's popularity is still so-so, but starting now everything you do is watched. this is what it means to be a star. a tiny mistake for you can be a big deal for them. they will say they wanted you to do whatever you want but expect you to be perfect too. they said they want you to be happy, but you'll always be forced to act differently. why? because you're on cam. everyone is watching you. everyone can judge you. that's why i want to ask you…” he leaned down and faced you.
“are you willing to hide the relationship or be yourself and confidently confirm the rumour?” he gave you a pressuring stare.
your eyes widened at his question.
‘what do i want?’
‘that's right. i want everyone to know wakatoshi is m– no. my bandmates. they're always there whenever– but... wakatoshi... my bandmates…’
“i–”
“before you answer that, i want to remind you that no matter what you choose, there'll be consequences.” he reminded you.
“i... don't know.” you held your head low, not wanting to have eye contact with anyone. you heard them let out a sigh. “sorry…”
you heard the swivel chair turning around. the person blocking him moved, allowing him to see you with your eyes locked on the ground.
“okay then. we won't be giving an official statement about this matter. we'll do the shows that weren't cancelled. (y/n), go and take a break.” he directed.
“yes?” you looked up, surprised. “but—”
“it's an order from your boss. hayashi will be doing projects without their main vocalist for a while. that's the best i can do. dismissed.”
meanwhile, while you were having the meeting, the four people stayed in the studio with antsy feet.
“tch.”
sachiko and yumi anxiously waited for the meeting to end, riku too, but there's also something in sachiko that's about to end.
and it's her patience.
“tch.” another 'tch' came out of mori's mouth as he looked outside the window with an evident glare on his face.
sachiko has had enough.
“oi, mori. i don't know if you're clicking your tongue because of what's happening or whatnot, but i'm gonna ask you to not do that when (y/n) come back.” sachiko calmly asked mori. mori looked at her.
“of course, i'm doing this because of what's happening.” he replied.
“can you not–”
“i…!"” mori pointed at himself. they all looked at him wondering what he's about to say. his eyes were visibly angry and pissed.
“i was told by higo to not comment or reply to any of the hate posts or those slandering (y/n)! do you know how hard it is to fight the urge not to reply to those?!” the three of them could hear the pain in mori's voice.
‘he must've been really fighting the urge that much.’ the couple thought.
“are you an idiot?” sachiko fumed.
“why?!” mori retorted.
“leave it to me. a dummy account will fix your problem.” she confidently said and mori's face lit up.
“ah! that's right! as expected of you, sachiko!” he excitedly applauded.
“call me, sachiko-neesan.” she ordered.
“no way.” he immediately turned down.
“huh? wait–” sachiko stopped and then suddenly showed a thrilling grin. she chuckled maniacally, alerting mori that she's definitely planning something.
“that's right. we have another keyboard warrior.” she muttered as she reached for her phone and called a boy named juno.
to be continued…
if you're interested for the next one, the whole story is already available on my patreon.
if you'd like to support me, you can also check here!
❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
i hope you enjoyed it!
“yumi, is (y/n) already here?” sachiko frantically asked yumi for the nth time.
“she's not here yet. calm down.” yumi also anxiously said to her for the nth time.
the two are in front of your agency's entrance, while they wait for your arrival. sachiko was supposed to be in her work already, but she's dead worried about how it went, so now she's here.
yumi doesn't even know why sachiko is so nervous, that it made her nervous too and now they're both nervous.
“sachiko, what are you doing here?”
they both looked where the voice came from and sachiko let out the most relieved sigh she had ever released in her whole life.
“aren't you supposed to be in your office already?” you asked her, but she just hit you on your arms. “ouch, what?”
“i really should've come with you, then i wouldn't have been dead worried about how it went.” she said and you chuckled, even yumi chortled even though she won't know what you two are talking about.
“it was fine. he said he wanted to apologize and he said he wants to fix our relationship.” you explained to her, but she sighed again.
“if it were me, i would make them suffer first, before forgiving them, but i can't do anything, since that's what you want. all in all, i'm glad you're alright— ah, i should head to work, at least now, i can move without worrying.” sachiko said as she glanced at her wristwatch. she kissed both your and yumi's cheeks and waved, while she walked to the loading station for buses.
you and yumi went into the building and while in the elevator, she finally asked what you and sachiko were talking about.
“ah. my father.” you shortly answered.
“your dad?” you nodded at her. you started telling her what happened.
“oh. that's nice to hear.” she smiled. “it seems like your boyfriend played a part in your decision to forgive your father.” she said,
you sheepishly looked around while bobbing your head yes.
“ah!” you shouted out of nowhere, yumi's soul almost leaving her body.
“w-what?” she worriedly asked.
“i forgot that higo told me that they want to talk to me and eita!” you put your hand on your mouth, before ruffling through your bag and searching for your phone. you immediately went to the messages, seeing that there's two new notifications there.
from: higo
it's already finished, (y/n) :|
from: eita
we have a meeting today, don’t tell me you forgot?
we’re starting. i’ll tell them you’ll be late for a while.
be careful on your way.
hey, where are you? we're about to finish.
it ended already, haha.
you grimaced knowing what you will expect once you arrive there.
yumi opened the door and the four guys were waiting for your arrival. higo had his arms crossed on his chest, one brow raised slightly. you looked away, quite sure what he's thinking.
higo shook his head sideways and sighed. he clapped his hands twice, wanting all our attention.
“okay, now that our always late vocalist is here. let's discuss what the management talked about at our meeting just now.”
‘damn, i just got called out by higo.’
“listen, everyone. this is important for our team. the company had arranged a performance for us.” he sighed first before looking at us with a straight face. “and i'm going to tell you guys, this will be the biggest gig we've had since we started.” he stated. almost all of us let out gasps.
“really?! what makes you say that, higo?” riku asked him excitedly.
“they managed to find a spot for us. they haven't mentioned yet in what order we are, but here are the lineups—” higo said as he grabbed his notes and mentioned some band names that are popular around the country, some also worldwide.
“we'll be performing at the same event with those guys?!” riku shouted in amazement.
“yes, it'll be this weekend, so that's why we should show what we've got and do our best.” higo hyped and you swore you saw your leader leapt like a frog.
“ah, also about why eita was there…” higo started.
“do you think i should practice?” mori spoke out of nowhere, you looked at him, failing to hear what higo said next. you were about to answer, but he continued speaking.
“you're right. no need, because i'm gifted enough not to practice.” he said with matching nodding.
“you know, people who always say that always end up messing up. just practice.” you replied to him.
“messing up is not present in my vocabulary, miss.” he confidently said.
“where do you get that confidence of yours? i want some of that.”
“genetics, i guess?”
…
“hi.” he smiled.
“hey, wakatoshi.” you greeted him as you stepped into his car. your work just finished and at the exact moment it ended, ushijima messaged you that he's on his way to pick you up.
he helped you with your bag and placed it on the backseat. you leaned forward to him, while he's putting it and kissed his cheeks.
he tried keeping his usually stoic face, and soon a light smile showed up. he calmly started the engine and took a u-turn.
“uh? my place is that way, wakatoshi.”
“i know.” he shortly answered, his eyes focused on the road.
“then, why are we going this way?” you asked him.
“do you still remember what i said back in the theme park?” he quizzed.
“can you narrow it down? you said a lot of things back then, wakatoshi and too many unexpected things you did too.” you said, face palming, just remembering what tendou made him do.
“we'll be having training outside the city for a week and i won't be able to physically see you during that time.” he narrated, while he also kept in check the surrounding cars.
“oh. then you won't make it to our upcoming event…” you sulked.
“i'm sorry, i'll try to watch it on my mobile.” he recompenses after hearing what you said. you just let out a weak chuckle and held his arm.
“you don't need to do that, wakatoshi. it's your job. you should focus on the training.” you said. “so, why are we going this way?”
“i want to spend time with you before i fly to our training's location.” he placed his palm on top of yours, resting on his biceps and looked at you for a moment and went back to the road.
you smiled brightly at him, even though he couldn't see it.
“okay, let's spend all the time left today, together.” you cheerfully said.
after a 20-minute drive, ushijima parked the car in front of an extravagant-looking restaurant. your jaw dropped as soon as you hopped out of his car.
“wakatoshi, don't tell me you managed to reserve a table for us here?” you asked him.
“yes, i did manage to, (y/n).” he straightforwardly answered. he looked at your amazed face and smiled, before inviting you inside.
“welcome.” the guy at the front desk said.
“reservation under ushijima wakatoshi.” he casually said. the clerk checked for a second and confirmed his book and led us to our table.
he politely points to the table while bowing a bit. ushijima walked you to the chair and pulled it out for you.
“thank you, wakatoshi.” you thanked him when he's sure that you're alright, he walked to the opposite side and seated himself.
the dinner went by perfectly and you two had a comfortable one-sided conversation. you didn't have trouble thinking of what to talk about while speaking to him. you can see him listening intently and it made you want to talk and talk to him.
after resting and letting the food digest even a little. you two decided to leave.
“let's go?” he asked, standing up and offering his hand. you nodded and accepted his hand.
as soon as you two stepped out of the door and walked to where his car is, fans suddenly came rushing forward.
“are you ushijima wakatoshi from adlers?” a lady asked and ushijima confirmed it by nodding. “can we take a picture with you?” she asked pulling her friend beside her.
ushijima looked at you first, asking you with his eyes if it's alright with you. you just smiled and nodded. ‘cute. he doesn't want to make me feel uncomfortable.’ you thought.
you watched him interact with them with loving eyes until a girl in a teenager came up to you.
“excuse me, are you the vocalist of hayashi? the one that got trending just recently?” she nervously asked.
“yes. i am.” you answered politely. her eyes shone brightly and she then handed you her phone. you confusedly accepted it, scanning it before looking at her face. you saw how excited she looked.
‘maybe she was too happy to talk.’ you thought about chuckling a bit.
“do you want a picture together?”
after a while, ushijima finally decided to say goodbye to the fans, wanting to spend more time with you just as he planned.
he opened the car door and you immediately got on it. he then dove to a cliff and parked where it's not too dangerous. he opened his car's trunk and that's where you two were seated.
the view of the night lights and the clear sky with the stars twinkling just as bright as the luminescence under it is magical enough, but sharing this view with the most special person for you made it even better— no, made the best view.
while you were focused on the scenery, you didn't notice ushijima's hand snaking around your waist. the move his love master, the one and only, tendou satori, said to do when he told him about this date ushijima planned.
maybe because of the time, but you felt the breeze hike up your bare skin. you rubbed both of your hands together, trying to make friction and help you warm up.
ushijima noticed your movement and realized what you're trying to do, so he thought of another way to warm you up.
he put both of his hands on your hips and lifted you like you're just a feather and placed you in between his legs. he reached for his jacket and put it on, with you inside the jacket too.
‘what? am i a cat?’
“are you still cold?” he unaffectedly queried.
‘what would he do if i said i'm still cold? well, self, it's for you to find out.’
“well, i'm still feeling a bit chilly, but i can bear it.” you said and fake laughed.
‘wah. i suck at acting. who will buy that fake laugh i just did?’
“is that so? what should we do?” he replied.
‘he fell for it! wait— that is actually worrisome. this guy might get easily scammed.’
you let out a laugh and looked up at him.
“i'm just kidd—”
‘uh? ehh? what is this...? what is this?! did he just—’
“wakatoshi…” you called for him.
“hm?” he hummed.
“i'm not quite sure, but is that your palms i'm feeling on my stomach?” you said, but he just hummed again.
“and, are you nuzzling your nose on my neck?” you described exactly what he's doing, as your cheeks showed the deepest shade of red, even in this dark.
“yes, you're correct on both.” he answered, his lips against your skin.
‘oh my god, don't speak! i can feel the vibrations from your voice on my neck! ugh!’
“they said sharing each other's warmth is an effective way to kill the cold.” he explained, but it made you even more flustered.
‘wakatoshi, you're too pure.’
‘that's not what they meant by 'sharing each other's warmth'.’
“w-well, now i feel fine already, how about let's continue sightseeing?” you said and slipped your body out of the jacket. you wiped the small cold sweats on your forehead.
“look at that building. it's so high.” you said, trying to avert your mind, but you did not receive a response.
you looked back at his face and saw him frowning a bit and sulking that you went away from his touch.
you tried to fight it, but lost and gave in to your boyfriend's charm. you went back inside the jacket and he silently but happily put everything back into place.
“holding you this close is quite fun and relaxing. and exciting.” he muttered.
you just sighed and chuckled.
you just decided to let him do what he wants and you tried to focus not on his hot breath and hands, but the sight.
“wakatoshi…” you cop his attention and you received a hum from him again. “today is one of the best days in my life for me.” you said you threw your head backwards, resting it on his shoulder and smiled at the sky.
“did something happen today?” he curiously asked, still comfortably enjoying your scent, now that he had greater access with you gazing up the ether.
“mhm. today, our band received great news, right now, we're having a date and spending time genuinely and then, i met up with my father. he said he wanted to make up with me and wants to start a new life, a good one, of course. he even left in a hurry, when the work he applied for, called him bac—”
“you met with your father?” his deep voice resonated through your ear, now that he's closer than usual.
“huh?” you stopped talking with him interrupting you and thought about what you and he said.
‘eh? shoot! i forgot that i haven't told him about that yet!’
he finally set your neck free, but you're not relieved by that. you looked at him and he had a small frown.
“no, wakatoshi—”
“is it true?” he asked. you sighed, before going out of his jacket again.
you stood up and faced him. “yes, wakatoshi. i did meet my father today. sorry for not telling you.” you explained to him.
“why didn't you tell me? do you not trust me?” he said with a straight and expressionless face but his eyes said otherwise.
“no! of course, i trust you! it's just when i talked about him the other day, your reactions gave me a hint that you'd try to stop me from meeting him and i know you're just worried, but still—” you clarified.
“whatever you say and want will always be my top priority. if you told me not to follow you, i will not follow you.” he said, looking right through your eyes.
“but—” you tried to say, but he cut you off.
“i will try harder.” he suddenly said and stood on his feet.
“on what?” you asked, gazing up at his towering build compared to you.
“it seems like i wasn't able to show you that you are my most cherished person, that i would never do anything that would upset you, that's why you don't have to worry about me stopping what you decided to do.” he said.
he took a step forward and pulled you to a hug.
“however, i'm relieved that nothing wrong happened.” he uttered and held you like you're slipping away from him.
instead of returning the hug, you created a small space between the two of you, you placed both of your hands on his face.
“i got it. thank you, wakatoshi.” you thanked him and closed the gap again, by tip-toeing and kissing his lips.
he was surprised at first when you pushed him away but soon calmed down.
and that's why your plan of just a peck turned into a longer one.
both exchanged kisses, passionate ones, sloppy ones, no one wanting to break off the connection.
his hands are placed around your hips and the back of your neck. your hands resting on his chest.
no one wanted to cut it off, until the breeze once again disturbed you and made you quiver. ushijima immediately noticed it and pulled away.
“are you cold?” he asked while catching his breath.
you shyly nodded, embarrassed that you broke the mood. he just embraced you.
“should we head to my place?” he asked.
you immediately blushed as soon as you heard that.
“m-mhm… let’s go to your place for the night.”
ushijima planted one last kiss before you two decided to drive to his place, with you not sure what to expect.
…
it's been days since ushijima left for his training, but here you are with sachiko staring at the tv screen with a horrified look.
you read the text multiple times, but it never changes the context.
“aspiring singer and vocalist of the rising band hayashi, (l/n) (y/n), facing a huge backlash and criticism!”
“volleyball superstar and japan's canon, ushijima wakatoshi found cheating on his significant other! with solid proof and photographs!”
‘why? how did this happen?’
to be continued…
if you're interested for the next one, the whole story is already available on my patreon.
if you'd like to support me, you can also check here!
❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
i hope you enjoyed it!
‘after my shift, i hurriedly changed and went home.
when i got there, i saw a case of alcohol in the living room, almost half of it was already ingested.
i found my father laying on the couch, with a bottle in his hand, drunk again.
i tried to reach for the bottle and clean it up, but just when i was about to take it off his hands, he woke up and swatted my arms.
“what are you doing?! you want to steal my drink?!” he shouted at me.
“no, dad. i was just trying to clean up.” i tried to explain and he seemed to recognize my voice.
“what? you're already here?” he said annoyedly and i nodded. “whatever. just go and cook our dinner.” he turned his body away from me.
“um... dad, about my work—” i didn't even get to finish my sentence when he suddenly threw the bottle right next to my face. i froze at my position, but my eyes tried to follow the bottle's path and saw the shards of glass on the floor.
he stood up and walked until he reached me. he grabbed my chin forcefully with one hand.
i admit that right now, i'm really scared.
for years, he never raised his hands on me, that's why i thought everything's fine and i refused sachiko, but now... i'm thinking i should've held her hand.
“somehow, i already know what you want to say. and you know what my answer is? no! i took care of your ass for years when i could've throw you or took you into adoption, but i didn't! you should be grateful and pay me back!” he screamed in my face and threw me with all his strength.
“fucking useless. this is exactly why i haven't told my ex-co-workers that i have a daughter, you're a shame to me!” he added.
as i was holding my face that he just held when i realized what he just said. i looked up at him while seated on the ground.
“what?”
but i tried to be a good daughter both in house and in school, just so he can be happy that i'm doing my best.
‘am i really that disappointing of a daughter to him?’
i look down with teary eyes. i feel so disappointed with myself. all my efforts are disregarded. he didn't even look at it.
“just so you know, (y/n) isn't obliged to pay you back for keeping her all this time.”
we both looked on our right side where the voice came from.
“who are you?! how did you get in?!” my father asked.
“sachiko?” i said to no one, but she waved her hand to me.
“i was right, you aren't mature enough. you even forgot to lock the front door when you came in. tsk, tsk.” she placed her hand on her hips and shook her head sideways.
“how dare you come in here without permission?! get out, you trespasser!” my father ordered and pointed at the door.
“ah! how dare you call me a trespasser?!” sachiko shouted back at him.
‘huh? isn't she clearly trespassing?’
‘anyways, she's so brave to shout at my father even though everyone can see that he's drunk.’
“i am (y/n)'s best friend and i am here to pick her up.” she stated proudly.
“pick her up? why? where are you two going?"”
‘this is… my chance!’
before she could speak, i silently picked up myself and ran behind sachiko.
“away from you.” i declared while looking at him dead in the eye, making sachiko smile.
‘this time i won't think twice about coming with sachiko.’
he stared for a bit before he laughed loudly.
“oh, i see. then what are you planning to do about me?” he smirked, knowing how little third-year middle schoolers can do.
sachiko reached for something in her pocket and immediately threw it in my father's direction.
he easily evaded it and even laughed as he watched it fall on the other side of the room.
“that's it?” he mocked, but when he turned around, sachiko was already in front of him.
“surprise.” she cussed and hit his crotch with all her might and ran to me.
i saw my father grieved in pain, before sachiko pulled me out of the house.
i looked at him one last time. it wasn't the best picture since he was almost crying in pain, that i almost laughed at, but somehow as i took every step out of the place, i felt as if shackles were slowly slipping out of my feet.
as sachiko ran us away from our house, i stared at her until i realized something.
“i didn't bring my clothes and important documents with me,” i muttered.
when sachiko looked around and thought that we're far from our previous location, she let go of my hands.
“let's just wait for an opportunity to grab your requirements if ever your father goes out, and about your clothes, forget about them. let's just buy new ones.” she said as she exhaled deeply, trying to catch her breath.
“i don't have money,” i told her, but she just smiled at me, even with her exhausted face.
“to tell you the truth, my father left hefty numbers in his bank account.” she bragged, raising her eyebrows repeatedly.
“thank you so much.” i thanked her.
“no need to be formal.” she dispelled. “also about school…”
“ah, you're right. it seems like i'll be forced to skip this school year because i need to work for my school fee—”
“no. you don't have to, just like i said earlier, my father left a lot of money, it can support both of our fees until high school. we can just work part-time in college. where we'll be paid, not with alcohol, but money!” she huffed.
i stared at her again.
“what?” she asked.
“why are you willing to do all of that for me? if you won't pay for mine, then you'll have enough money for your college fees. so, why?” i questioned her sincerely. she looked away and took one deep breath.
“because i was right when i thought we're riding the same boat. we're getting caught up on our parent's shits and problems.” she explained. i listened to her quietly.
“you even told me that your parents used to disown you, in front of you! you didn't even ask to be born in the first place! it's their own ass fault for not using condoms!” she suddenly raised her voice and threw a punch in the air. her gesture made me chuckle.
“also, that.” she pointed. i tilted my head. “do you know why i'm always staring at you in class?”
“isn't that because you said you weren't deceived by how i act?” you said, remembering her words.
“yeah, that's one. but, i have other reasons.”
“what is it?” i asked, curious about the other reason.
“every time i look at your face, i'm always thinking: "ah, this type of girl is usually noisy, but she won't talk to me, so i don't know if i'm right." so, i promised to myself that i'll make you my friend and i'll witness it with my own eyes, how loud you can be.” she quoted and even went on a thinking position.
“i'm confident, i'm not loud.” i said, pouting a bit.
“we'll see about that.” she challenged and took my hands again. “let's go to my place, before your father chases after us.”
“also, you gotta give the name of the best friend of that guy who's searching for you yesterday.” she said while looking in front.
“searching for me?” i let her pull me along.
“yeah, he looks so serious waiting at the gate, i would've backed away, but the redhead next to him looks so cute, so i asked them who they were waiting for. you gotta introduce him to me, but for now, let's take a rest at my house.” she smiled widely at me and looked back at the road.
‘why is he waiting for me?’
the following week, the same neighbour who told me that my mother had departed for a different country, once again informed me that my father was detained for theft and assault.
she said that he tried to steal some alcohol at a supermarket. he wasn't in his best state of mind, he's drunk again, so the owner was about to just let it go, but my father created a scene and punched him.
the others told me that i should go back to our house, but i chose not to and stayed with sachiko.
the house only reminds me of my mother and father and how shitty our family is.
the next years, sachiko mother came and apologized to her and they restored their relationship and they both agreed to let sachiko live with me and since then, her family treated me as if i was part of their family and didn't even think twice for paying for my fees, along with sachiko and i am thankful for that. they even let us enroll in a private high school academy.
starting now, i'm going to live my life while doing everything i want happily, now that no one would be ashamed of me or disown me.
i'll be able to be myself starting now.’
...
“hey, dad. do you know how mom is doing?” you questioned your father suddenly after you reminisced about your past.
“no. i don't know why she is. i haven't heard anything from her for years already.” he answered.
“me too. i can't even recall what she looks like already.” you said and scoffed.
“i'm sorry.” he grovelled.
“why are you apologizing again?” you furrowed your brows and placed your hands on your lap.
“if i tried to become a good father from the start maybe she would've stayed and we could've been a perfect family.” he clasped his palms together tightly.
“that's impossible. you know what she will do just to achieve what she wants.” you contrast and he chuckled.
“you're right.” he just laughed at how he realized he once fell in love with that woman.
you studied the face of the man in front of you. he looks more approachable than before. his smile doesn't send the same shivers you felt back then.
you took a deep breath and exhaled it just as fast.
“you know, recently i visited my boyfriend's house.” you fixed your disposition as you started.
“oh, you already have a boyfriend?” he asked with interest.
“yeah, and i met his grandmother there. she told how their relationship was awful, but one she decided to change and tried to reconnect with him. i saw how close they are and thought that people can change, but my boyfriend said it all depends on the person.” you stopped and gazed into his eyes.
“back then, sachiko tried her best to get me out of my shell and make me able to talk freely whenever i wanted. when eita invited me to come and join the band, i rejected it multiple times first, because i thought if i messed up they'll be ashamed of me. i always have a hard time making conversations, because i thought they'd get mad if i spoke up first.” you recalled all the hardships you went through, without breaking eye contact with him.
“it only showed how much of an effect you left on me, even though you're not there anymore, but…” you took a deep breath before continuing.
“with you apologizing and wanting to change... can i expect that it'll be a good change?” you quiveringly said, as you finally noticed that your whole body is shaking, and not because of fear.
you saw how his eyes softened and soon droplets from the corner of his eyes fell that he quickly covered with his hands.
he nodded repeatedly while he wiped his tears.
“yeah... i promise, it is…” he shakily answered.
you let out a chuckle as you see him wiping his face like a child.
“somehow it feels weird to see you cry like that, dad.” you commented which made him laugh.
“sorry, it's just i really wanted to do this for a long time...” he sobbed, burying his face in his hands.
“i realized that never in my life had i ever tried to treat you like you're my daughter, or even showed it. i know, i'm a scumbag, i might even be worse than that, but when i was inside my cell, i was dead worried about you. i wanted to ask someone how you are doing, but i never had visitors nor anyone to call to. that's when, i noticed that deep inside me, i still see you as my only family, though that's not the only thing, i also remembered how much of a bastard i was. i thought it's too late to ask for forgiveness, but i still want to try.” he added, stopping at times to sniff.
“that's why thank you (y/n). thank you for forgiving me.” he thanked once again and this time, he didn't try to hold back his tears.
“i never had the best childhood and i only had one friend back then, but i still want to thank you for keeping me under your care for years. some people went through rougher experiences than me, i'm still thankful that i didn't experience the same from you. thank you, dad.” you said and he looked at you.
“you made a friend back then?” he asked with hope.
“mhm. he was— i don't remember his face anymore, but he was my first friend and... and…” i trailed off, trying my best to remember things.
“ah! his family moved, that's why we— we made a promise to each other…” your voice slowly faded as you stared at nothing.
“...utsui-kun! don't forget our promise, okay?! promise me that you won't get a girlfriend, while i'm away! you'll marry me one day just like you promised, okay?!...”
“...i promise, (y/n)!...”
“...what i hate the most is promise-breakers…”
“....so, my will wavered when my mom asked me again concerning aika, and i agreed with her. i apologize for breaking our promise…”
‘huh? what is this? the first one is from utsui-kun, but the last two sentences are from wakatoshi, right? why—’
“(y/n)?”
“(y/n), is something wrong?”
you clicked back to reality when you heard your father's voice. you shook your head and brushed off the thought.
“sorry about that, where was i? ah. that's right, dad. i'm still glad that you decided to change. thank you for that.” you said going back to what you were saying.
“no, i should be the one thanking you for giving me another chance. i'll do my best.”
you just smiled at him and nodded. while he was cleaning his face, you stood up and walked to his side.
you leaned over to him and gave him a loose hug. he was surprised at first, but he soon gave in and hugged your arm back. you noticed how he melted into his daughter's embrace.
he must've really longed for this moment to come.
‘me too... we shared the same feelings again, but this time i'm happy it's a positive one.’
“i'll look forward to seeing your efforts, dad.” you whispered that he answered by nodding.
to be continued…
if you're interested for the next one, the whole story is already available on my patreon.
if you'd like to support me, you can also check here!
❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
i hope you enjoyed it!
“welco— (y/n)! welcome, welcome!” the shop owner, okamura, changed his greetings as soon as he saw you enter. juno, who was serving a group of customers, looked at your direction excitedly, before focusing back on them.
“hello.” you greeted them as you walked to the counter.
“juno was ecstatic when your guys' performance went viral, he was screaming in his room the whole night. he's such a fan of you guys.” the father said as you two looked at the teenager smiling.
“i saw him continuously retweet almost every video of our performance. when i showed it to my bandmates they said they would love to meet him.” you waved at juno while he served another batch of customers their orders.
you glimpsed at his father, smiling fondly at him.
“old man,” you called for him. he looked at you and raised his brows as soon as he examined the look on your face.
“are you meeting someone important today?” you smiled at him and nodded.
it's not like you've ever mentioned this problem to him, but it made you happy that he can already read what's on your mind without speaking.
he walked to a table where he knows other customers won't be able to hear what you will talk about with you following him.
after serving the customers, juno tried to go to you but his father stopped him, saying you can't and will just talk to him next time. he was pouty for a bit, but being the understanding son juno is, he just went to fix things and made himself busy.
you're sure, you got here a bit earlier than the agreed time, maybe it's nervousness because it can never be exciting.
while waiting, your phone buzzed and saw that higo messaged the group chat, saying the management needs to talk to you and semi. you replied saying you'll be late today and he immediately said it's okay, as long as you'll be there in thirty minutes after the said time.
“(y/n).” a raspy but familiar voice called your name.
you clutched your phone tightly in your hand and hesitantly looked up at him.
there he was standing, his voice didn't change, but his appearance did. his muscular arms back then are like twigs now, so as the other parts of his body, his hair that you can see on the side of his cap are almost all grey now.
‘does being inside the prison have this effect? i thought it’s the opposite.’
“can i take a seat?” he politely asked, which made you almost scorned.
“go ahead.” you authorized.
he took off his cap and fixed his locks before wiping the bullets of sweat on his forehead while laughing lumberingly.
“sorry about this. i ran here as fast as i can, i got lost on my way here and the next thing i knew time already passed and i'm lat—”
“i'm not interested in your adventure stories.” you pertly spelt out to him.
sachiko would be very joyous to hear your response, and she did want to come too, but you refused.
you told her you wanted to resolve this by yourself. you made sure not to make it sound like she was annoying wanting to join you because of how she feels and that she's just dead worried.
you didn't tell ushijima about it either, you knew by how he acted last time that he'll stop you, so you didn't.
“ah, sorry.” he scuffed the side of his hair sheepishly. “how was sachiko? i think i got her enraged yesterday. is she doing alright?” he asked, changing the topic.
“she's well.” you answered briefly.
“oh, i see. that's great.” he replied, looking at you smiling. you squint your eyes at this.
“stop with the farce. like hell, you cared about anyone else or even your own daughter. just tell me what you want, so i can go to work now.” you slammed your hand on the table, careful not to disturb the other customers.
“work… that's right, you're in a band right now.” he looked down, while still holding his cap.
“actually… while i was searching for a job last week, i got hungry and went to a food truck nearby…” he started to narrate something. you rolled your eyes and just looked away.
“i took a seat next to two students who were watching something, then they suddenly talked about the members and they mentioned your name. at first i thought it was just someone with the same name as yours, but then they played another video of you singing with your team and i was sure it's really you. i asked them if i could see the video for a bit and i saw you on the screen, you looked so happy and proud while you sang with a smile.” the male showed a soft smile, but you failed to see it since you were looking away and he's facing the ground.
“i wanted to tell the two students: “this is my daughter!”, but i remembered what i did. that i don’t have the rights.” he released a deep shaky breath, while you bit your lower lip.
“i really regretted what i did, (y/n).” he added.
“only took you almost ten years to realize.” you scoffed.
“i really do, (y/n). that's why i wanted to meet with you. i want to apologize to you in person.” he finally raised his head and met your eyes.
‘'i'm sorry', huh?’
‘is sorry really enough?’
…
‘it's just a normal day inside our house.
screams and shouts from the living room ringing through my ear.
‘they're fighting again. for the 9th time this week.’
‘ah.’ another sound of glass breaking. that's the third one for this night.
‘i want someone to comfort me.’
‘my ears hurt. my head hurts. my body hurts. my heart hurts.’
‘my friend just moved away today. i lost my only friend today. yet, i can’t even grieve about it because of their fight.’
this isn't what a child should hear every day in her home but look. a child on the corner of her room, covering her ears trying to lessen the noises she's hearing.
‘i hate it.’
but...
“i don't want to argue with you anymore. i'm leaving.”
i opened my eyes hearing my mother say the words she already said multiple times already. i walked quietly to the door, opening it slightly, enough for me to peek at the gap.
‘it's coming…’
“then leave. bring that brat of yours too and this time don't come back.” my father said and drank the bottle of alcohol in his hands.
“huh?! why would i bring that child?! go raise her on your own! she's your daughter!” my mother crossed her arms and flicked her hair, she even let out a mocking laugh.
‘i hate it when they're fighting, but... i hate it, even more, when they disown me.’
i'm sure. i'm sure that after my mother would speak those words, she'll finally walk to her room and will start packing.
that's why, when she walked past my room, i opened the door wider so she could see me, hoping she'll change her mind about leaving, but all i received was a glare from her and a loud clicking of her tongue and continued walking to her room.
i was surprised. i thought parents love their children. i heard kids always get looked at lovingly by their parents. so, why was she looking at me like that?
like i was in the way of something?
does she hate me? did she not love me like how i see our neighbors love their children?
‘no, no, no. don’t think that way. be glad they’re still letting you live under their roof. that’s what dad always says. that’s right. i should be grateful for that.’
i tried to forget that look. that look of contempt on her face. i tried so hard to forget it, i kept that day locked in the deepest part of my mind and heart. unknowingly locking away that certain memory of my childhood friend along.
i thought that this would be just like the past where after a few days, she'll be back, saying that she wanted to come back, but she didn't.
we heard that she found a rich old widower and decided to seduce him, so she can be wealthy and finally migrate overseas, the dream she really wanted.
when my father heard it from a neighbour, he just yawned and went to the kitchen to get more alcohol.
the thing is me too. even myself was surprised by my own reaction.
i had no reaction at all, when our neighbour left, i just went back to my room and slept. i thought i would
that was the time i realized, i was never close with my mother. she's always out with her friends and when she's here with them, she'll make me stay in my room. i never had a proper conversation with her.
i never missed her, even when months and years passed without her on my side.
maybe she and i don't have that kind of motherly bond like others.
years went by and i entered middle school.
in my third year of middle school, i met a volleyball addict that i rarely see, since we are attending different schools, at a park. we met only thrice, but during those times, he would always be waiting outside our gate and then leave after he asks me how my day went and says goodbye because he still has practice. i never got to talk to him about anything else, just that.
other than that, everyone commented that they think i am matured by the way i act and think and how i don't talk too much.
but, it's all just because of the unwritten rule in my house.
my father said that i should be grateful that he's still keeping me and told me that i will do all the work inside the house, whether it's fixing something to cooking to cleaning and to remember these two words.
“don't talk.”
apparently, he doesn't want me to disturb his drinking session with himself, even a slight noise would have me receiving a shout from him.
so, i, who's blinded by the idea of being appreciative that he's still keeping me, did it without complaint.
my classmates would always mistake that for maturity and would look at me with admiration, but there's one person who would always stare at me, whether the class is happening or not.
i think her name is manabu sachiko.
she's sitting behind me and every day, i would feel her icy stare. she never spoke to me, only when necessary, so i never started a conversation with her.
‘i suck at that, in the first place.’
maybe it's because of my father's rule, but i never talked to someone unless they talked to me first. that way, i know that i am permitted to speak.
i just continued to live my dull life, but everything only got worse when i was about to graduate and move to high school.
one time, i went home and found the inside of our house a mess. my father was in the middle of the room, chest rising up and down rapidly.
“dad?” i placed my bag on the cabinet near me and walked up to him. my nose caught a familiar scent.
‘he's drunk again.’
when he turned his head towards my direction, i immediately froze from all my movements. at first, he glanced at me harshly, before he smiled sinisterly and grabbed my arm.
“ouch!” i cried as he dragged me out of the house. “dad?! it hurts!”
“didn't i tell you to shut up?” he glared daggers at me, making me quickly shut my mouth.
“i lost my goddamn job today and they didn't even give me my last payment! now i don't have anything to buy anymore alcohol!” he explained robustly, his hands wrapping on my skin even firmer.
he continued to yank me until we reached a convenience store. the door opened automatically, so he just went in and walked to the cashier who's also the manager according to his nameplate.
“hey, you're looking for personnel, right?” my father knocked on the counter to grab his attention.
“huh? ah. yeah, i am.” says the middle-aged as he cleaned the bottle he's holding with a clean cloth, while he scanned both of us. “what? you're going to apply?”
“yeah, but not me. my ‘daughter’ here will.”
i widened my eyes and tried to free my arm.
“dad, i can't work! it's prohibited to work even part-time in my school!"”i cried whilst fighting his hold.
he looked at me and warned me with his eyes, before looking back at the manager, who's giving us a weird eye. my lips automatically closed even with just his stare.
“she's applying?” he asked.
“don't worry, she's already at her legal age to work.” he informed the man with a wicked smile.
out of fear that my father would get mad at me and throw me away, my resistance slowly stopped and i just stared at the ground.
i thought that the manager wouldn't agree to it, but he did. of course, he will, after what my father offered him.
i tried to lie and told the school that i can't attend school, because i need to take care of my father. therefore, i skipped school until my first paycheck, hoping that would be enough to satisfy my father and let me go to learn.
but, i didn't expect that i wouldn't be receiving anything for working hard eight hours a day.
it turned out that my very generous father offered the owner that i don't have to accept money as a payment and a box of alcohol that is delivered directly to our house address is enough. seduced by the thought of a new employee without salary needed, just alcohol, the man agreed.
“wouldn’t that mean that i'm basically working for free?” i asked myself while checking a customer's purchase.
“if you're not getting paid, then maybe you are. unless you volunteered to do it.” the customer suddenly answered, making me look up at her rapidly.
my eyes widened, both in surprise and fear.
“manabu?”
she smirked at me while she picked up a lollipop on the side counter and opened it, immediately putting it in her mouth.
“hey there, classmate. fancy meeting you here.” she greeted me scornfully.
“wha— ho— why are you here? there's no way someone in my school would've lived close here!” my face showed clear panic that only amused her.
“i know, right? i don't even live kilometers around here.” she answered casually, taking out the candy.
“anyways, you're working.” she pointed. i swallowed my saliva and took a deep breath.
“please don't tell the school. i know i haven't been there, but i'm planning to go back. please.” i begged her sincerely.
“why are you working here?” she asked in a serious tone.
i looked away, not so sure about whether i should tell her the truth or not.
“you better tell me the truth, because i won't think twice about telling the school about your work, especially when you're being unpaid here.” she told me as if she just read my mind.
i was taken aback by it, but now i need to be truthful.
i started to tell her everything while the owner is still not here nor any customer coming in.
“that's why i didn't receive my wage. it's because of my father.” i finally finished, my fingers playing with each other nervously.
“then why don't you tell your father that you want the fruits of your hard work that he put on you forcefully?” she asked. i shook my head frightenedly.
“no! he'll throw me out! i can't live without a parent. it's sad to live without them.” i reasoned.
“hm? i'm not sad though.” she said that made me look at her.
“a... are you living by yourself?” i asked her and she simply nodded.
“my father is dead and my mother went and got another man who turned out to be a big money spender and gambler. but still, my mother didn't leave him, because she said it's ‘true love’.” she said and scoffed at the end.
“i know her, she'll definitely choose him over me and i don't care about that. that's why i left with my father's separate bank account he left for me that she doesn't know.” she said, smiling proudly.
“she didn't even look for me. we sometimes see each other, but we act as if we don't know one another, haha. isn't she a good mom?” she added and licked the lollipop again.
‘how is she taking it so lightly?’
‘i gotta admit, my mom isn't that different from hers, but even i was disheartened when i realized what kind of relationship i had with my mother.’
she seemed to notice that i fell silent and put on her serious face again.
“you know, i wasn't deceived.” she said out of nowhere.
“huh?” i gave her confused eyes.
“the school said you were mature, but i wasn't deceived by what they said, because i have this weird feeling that we are on the same boat, and sadly for you, but fortunate for me, i was right.” she further explained.
“i told myself, there’s no way that girl is ‘just mature’. someone who rarely talks? bullshit. more like scared to talk.” she scoffed. “i’ve never even seen you start a conversation with someone.”
“but, there's one thing i don't fucking understand.” she suddenly slammed the counter, making me flinch a bit.
“w-what is it?” i questioned anxiously.
“i don't understand why i want to extend my hand to you and take you away from your good-for-nothing father.” she leaned closer, only leaving a few centimetres between us.
“what?” i asked, dumbfounded by her confession.
she didn't reply and just looked at me as if she's staring right through my soul.
‘extend her hands? does that mean she wants to help me? why?’
she then stretches her arm to me.
does she want to help me? she wants to help me. when will be the next time someone would be willing to help me?
‘i should accep—’
“no.”
“what?” she was surprised by my answer. she smiled awkwardly at me with enlarged eyes.
i bowed at her.
“thank you so much, but no thanks. even if he did that he's still my father. maybe, i'll try to talk to him about my salary.” i thanked her and stood straight up again.
“wha—” she was about to speak when the bell chimed.
“welcome.” i greeted a newly arrived customer.
i gave sachiko the bag of her purchase and thanked her again. she hesitantly grabbed the bag in my hand, still can't believe the response i gave her.
‘oh. that's right.’
“sachiko.” i called for her, she immediately turned around, her eyes showed hope that maybe i changed my mind.
“please pay for the lollipop. that's not a freebie.”
“oh. here.” she said and scurried to search for money in her purse.
‘all i need to do is talk to him, that's right. i'm sure he'd understand, he's my father after all. mhm. that’s right.’’
to be continued…
if you're interested for the next one, the whole story is already available on my patreon.
if you'd like to support me, you can also check here!
❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
i hope you enjoyed it!
“wait, wait, wakatoshi. are we really gonna do this?” you stopped ushijima's hand before he could even open the door to their home sweet home.
you look over at him with an expression as if you are about to face your death.
‘well, it might be. because! i'm just about to meet the family of my boyfriend for about more than three weeks!’
‘yes, you two were best friends before, but you've never met any of his family because he rarely talks about himself and he never brought his parents to school.’
‘just how am i supposed to act? this is too sudden.’
“yes, (y/n). we're going to do it.” he carefully took your hands off of him and just kept them in his palms.
he looked at you once more.
“am i going a bit too fast?” he blurted out of nowhere. you widen your eyes with what he said.
“yes?!” you asked him. “we're not doing anything?! what are you on?!” you swung your hands defensively.
“i remembered you telling me that we should "take everything slowly". am i too quick for this? i read in an article that most lovers introduce their partners at a later date.” he explained calmly.
“oh, you were talking about that. i thought it was something else.” you laughed awkwardly and avoided eye contact with him.
“what do you mean?” he asked. you just shook your head.
“no, nothing.” you smiled at him. “also, i'm okay with it, but next time please do give me a notice before you do this kind of thing.” you pleaded, not wanting another sudden attack of nervousness because of his sudden plan.
“i did give you notice. in the car.” he plainly said as he was sure he did tell you that in the car.
“no, that's not the notice i was talking about. like, inform me days or hours before, not minutes before we do it, 'cause i might die from the tension.” you explained to him.
“i see. i'll keep it in mind.” he nodded. “please don’t die.” he smiled, playing along with you.
he watched as you mentally prepared yourself.
“should we go in now?” he asked and your body suddenly quivered again. “what's wrong?”
you closed your eyes for a bit and opened them quickly as you bit your lower lip.
“it's just i was calm just now, but now that you mentioned it again, my nerves won't calm down.” you scratched your cheeks fumbling with the freehand.
thanks to the article that he mentioned earlier, he remembered what to do with times like this. according to them, when your partner is feeling nervous you should remind them that you are with them and they're not alone.
“(y/n), i'm here.” he said and squeezed your hand softly. you gave him a weird but smiling look.
“yeah, i can see that. what are you talking about?” you said and chuckled lightly, thinking it was just like his usual messages whenever he picks you up.
‘it's not working.’ the olive-haired thought.
“maybe it takes some practice to perfect it.” he muttered to himself and you just looked at him.
now that the information he read didn't work on his first try, he has no choice but to follow his mentor's advice.
he let go of your hand and placed both of his rough palms on your cheeks, he lowered his head and touched your lips with his. he broke off the kiss himself and saw your red face. he smiled, feeling proud of himself.
“now you're not nervous about meeting my family anymore.” he uttered.
you looked down, touching your lips and savouring the taste and feel of his soft lips.
‘of course, my heart won't beat because of the nervousness of meeting them anymore! you just made it go crazy with just a kiss!’
with your mind still in a haze, ushijima finally opened the door and went inside, dragging you along carefully.
he temporarily released your hands to take off his shoes, and you also did the same. he reconnected your hands and walked through the hallway.
there was no one in the living room, so he asked you to sit on the couch first, and went to call for his family. you are seated quietly on the foamed furniture while your eyes wander on the room.
‘wow. their house is so amazing.’
“(y/n).” you looked to your side and saw ushijima walking to you with an elderly woman wearing a kimono that he's helping to walk.
you stand on your feet immediately and bow to greet her. when you looked at her, she was smiling lovingly at you.
“grandma, this is (y/n). she's my partner.” ushijima introduced. you bowed again and felt a hand on both of your arms.
“you're really grown up to be beautiful just like how wakatoshi said.” she complimented out of nowhere, making you flushed.
“thank you so much.” you thanked her shyly.
‘maybe wakatoshi is close enough with his grandmother to even talk about me to her.’
“take a seat, take a seat.” she offered and so you did. she took your hand and held it. “sorry, his mother went out with that girl, so you can't see her again.” she said, you were confused but replied fast.
‘again? i’ve never met wakatoshi’s mother though.’
“i've never met her before, but it's fine.” you looked at wakatoshi who's sitting on the couch for a single person. “that girl?” you asked him.
“aika.” he answered shortly. you raised your eyebrows for a bit before remembering what he said the other day. suzuki aika is close to ushijima's mother because his and her mothers are friends.
when his grandmother tightens the hold of your palm lightly, you look at her.
“my face changed drastically because time passed and so did yours, but it's okay that yours changed because it became more beautiful than when you were a child.” she said, smiling from ear to ear.
“yes? when i was a child? sorry, did we meet bef—” you didn't finish what you were saying when ushijima suddenly stood up and spoke.
“we should eat first.” he plainly said and helped his grandmother stand up and go to the dining table.
you didn't tell ushijima, but you're actually hungry even before you hopped in his car, because of the gig you and your band just did.
after eating, ushijima cleaned the plates. you insisted that you can clean the dishes and he almost agreed because he can't refuse a request from you. but before he could accept it, the older woman stopped you and said that she wanted to talk to you. you just nodded your head slowly and sat just like you were told to.
‘damn. now we're left alone together. should i talk first? or not?!’
“my child,” she once reached for your hand, you locked both of your hands and looked at her intently and gratefully.
‘thank god, i didn't have to think about a topic to talk about.’
“yes?” you asked. she pointed at ushijima with her mouth. you looked at the man washing the dishes, while wearing an apron that's obviously owned by her mother, because of the colour.
“did he tell you anything about me or our family?” she asked calmly.
“he does, though it rarely happens.” you answered and smiled sheepishly. she nodded slowly, saying it's understandable.
“the truth is, it's been just months since he started visiting us.” she confessed. you just tilted your head sideways. “after he saved up money and brought his own place, he seldom comes here. only when he is asked to.”
“why?” you inquired, curious about your boyfriend's family.
“because, me and his mother would always coerce him into using his non-dominant arm because it goes against our family's tradition, it's a small thing, but some of my relatives even considered it a taboo.” she shared, looking a bit guilty.
“back when he was still in high school, they're dorm-based so he's only here on weekends, but even if he is here, he'd always try to avoid us, because he's sure that we'd bring up the topic and his father, who's always beside him to persuade us not to change it, isn't here anymore.” her voice and face match each other, it both has pain and guilt in them.
you don't know what to say after hearing that. it's been just hours since you've met her, but she's been nothing but sweet to you, so you're not quite sure what to do.
“but, you know... i realized, though it was late, that maybe it was really his strength and what we were doing in the past not only made our connection as a family almost dissipate, but he also used it to encourage himself to prove to everyone that what he and his father decided wasn't wrong.” she narrated as she looked at his grandson ardently.
“i see. i'm glad you were able to restore your relationship.” you smiled at her genuinely.
“yes, we're still catching up with one another.” she smiled, her eyes smiling as well.
“really? that's good news. what do you usually talk about?” you asked.
‘wait. is it weird to ask what kind of conversations they are having with another person?’ you just shrugged off the thought and just went with it, since you already said it.
“our topics? you.” she said and smiled teasingly.
“yes?!” you lost control of your voice a bit, making ushijima look at you two, but went back to cleaning.
“back then, we would talk about volleyball 90% of the time, but now it's 20% volleyball and 80% about you.” she said and pokes your sides. “my grandson is so in love with you.” she cooed.
when she saw your flustered face, she just knew that she should stop, she lifted her hands and placed them on your cheeks, caressing them carefully.
“my dear, take care of my wakatoshi, okay?” her lightly shaking hands caused by her age massaged your cheeks sweetly. you nodded slowly at her.
“i might not be the best grandmother and i've done bad things to him, but i changed.” she said, you suddenly remembered that person because of that sentence.
‘changed, huh…’
“i want the best for him, and i know you are that one. i can see how wakatoshi changed too, he's gotten more expressive and talkative than he was back then, though all he talks about is volleyball and his beautiful girlfriend.”
‘i don't know if i should be happy that he talks about me or should feel sorry for whoever he talks to.’
“(y/n), it's getting dark. i should send you home now.” ushijima suddenly spoke up ruining the moment. before the older woman released your face, she placed a kiss on your forehead.
after bidding farewell to her, you and ushijima moved out and headed to his car immediately.
the whole ride ushijima noticed how quiet you were, just staring at the lights and the scenery as the car passed by.
“(y/n), is something wrong?” he asked, breaking the deafening silence. “did my grandmother say something?”
“hm?” you hummed, turning your head towards him. “sorry, did you say something?” you checked.
“yes, i asked you if something's wrong or if my grandmother said something you didn't like?” he repeated obediently.
“no! she didn't!” you denied.
“okay.” he plainly said, believing what you said already.
you laughed at his response, you don't know if just doesn't want to interfere anymore or he just doesn't care. hopefully not the latter.
you went back to your position earlier, resting your chin on your hand while you looked outside.
“i was just thinking…” you started.
the illumination of the skyscrapers flashed through your eyes. the car drove through the sky way, fast yet carefully.
“people can really change.” you finished.
“they can.” he replied. “and it's either for better or worse.”
you looked at him briefly and smiled.
“you're right. it all depends on the person on which they'll choose to become.” you said and stretched your arms upwards as if you were releasing all your negative energy.
“we should hurry. sachiko should be home by now.” you said, clinging onto his beefy arms.
“should we get something for her? she loves food, just like you.” he stated plainly.
“are you teasing me?” you pouted.
“i'm not.” he smiled, chuckling a bit. “i love that about you.”
you choked on your own saliva at his words. you cleared your throat and sat back on your seat properly.
“w-what should we get her? haha…”
...
“i'm home.” you voiced as soon as you stepped into the apartment.
you walked to the living room and saw sachiko watching another tv show she watched multiple times already.
“welcome back. why ar— am i smelling chicken wings right now?!” she suddenly shouted, you raised your hand holding the bags of the foods she likes.
since you've already eaten in ushijima's house, you just ate a bit and let her eat almost all of it.
“and then, he suddenly suggested we should go to his parents' place! out of nowhere!” you told her with matching actions.
“that sounds like a very wakatoshi thing to do.” she replied with a laugh.
“i almost died because of nervousness. that was on the spot.”
“thank goodness his grandmother was kind to m—”
*ring*
“oh, someone's calling. my hands are full.” sachiko said and stuffed another wing in her mouth.
you shook your head and stood up to pick up the call.
while you walked to the house phone, sachiko's phone vibrated and showed that her boyfriend messages him. she quickly opened it and saw the photo attached to the text.
it was a chocolate cake with sachiko's name on top of it, saying he just did it because he had free time, but it turned out great.
“(y/n), look at this. satori made a cake for me! be jealous of me!” she shouted hoping you'd hear her, but you didn't reply, so she repeated it and still didn't get a response.
worried about why you weren't answering her, she cleaned her fingers with the tissues and went to where you are.
when she arrived, she found you just standing there with your hand on your ear holding the phone's handset and she just knew who was talking on the other line.
“hello? is this (y/n)'s residence?”
she was right. sachiko snatched the phone from your hand and was about to press the hookswitch, but you stopped her.
‘why?’ she thought. she looked at your face and realized that something's different in you from the first time he called.
she let out a depleted sigh.
“what do you want?” she answered bravely.
“sachiko?! is this sachiko?! is (y/n) there?”
“what do you want?” she repeated boldly.
“i... just wanted to talk to her.”
“just where'd you get that confidence of yours? after what you've done?” sachiko's voice raised drastically, just thinking about what happened in the past makes her blood boil.
“sachiko, please just let me talk to my daughter.” he said from the other line.
“wh—” sachiko didn't finish speaking when you pat her shoulder.
she hesitantly gave the handset to you, but you smiled at her saying it's alright. you pressed the speaker button so that she can hear the conversation too.
“d—” you covered the transmitter first and took a deep breath.
it's as if the voice that was always there for me whenever i'm performing, seems to turn its back to me.
‘i can't find my voice.’
“they can change. and it's either worse or better.”
you took another deep breath, gathering all your strength to reply.
“hello? is someone still there? hello?”
“dad, it's me.” you finally spoke after you cleared your throat. the man on the other side was suddenly speechless.
“are you really out of prison already or you just decided to call while you’re in there suddenly?” you said straight.
“no, (y/n). i am already out of prison and i just wanted…”
“what? money to feed you?”
“no! that's not it!”
“then what is it?” you interrogated while sachiko listened intently.
“i want to talk to you in person. can i?”
sachiko repeatedly shook her head no and was about to press the button to end the call, but you stopped her.
you only mouthed her ‘it's okay’ and held her hand soothingly.
“fine.”
...
ushijima just finished showering when he heard his phone’s notification pop.
with a towel on his lower body, flashing his toned abs, large chest and chunky biceps throughout his room, his one hand holding another towel to dry his olive-coloured hair and the other hand holding his phone.
his eyebrows raised when he read the message you just sent.
“wakatoshi”
“thank you”
“for giving me strength”
“have i done something worth praising?”
“i don’t recall anything, but you’re welcome.”
“i’m glad i’m able to give you something like that.”
“of course”
“you always do”
you smiled at your screen, before wishing him good rest and placing it on your nightstand.
after a while, you found yourself drifting to imagine how your plan of meeting him would go. you stared at the ceiling fiercely, thinking about how you will face your father.
“don't talk.”
you closed your eyes tightly and ruffled your hair.
‘damn it. i tried my best to forget it, just for it to come back instantly now.’
to be continued…
if you're interested for the next one, the whole story is already available on my patreon.
if you'd like to support me, you can also check here!
❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
i hope you enjoyed it!
“hey, wakatoshi is already here to pick you up.” sachiko said opening the door to your room, while you apply the final touches to your make-up to cover your sleep-deprived face.
you thanked her and immediately headed out of the room as soon as you finished, and walked to the front to meet wakatoshi. you opened the door, and wakatoshi was wearing his usual stoic face.
“good morning, wakatoshi.” you greeted and kissed him on the cheeks. he was about to greet you back, but he halted first and frowned.
“what's wrong?” you questioned him, closing the door behind you.
“...no. good morning to you too.”
after addressing each other, he took your hand on his one hand and walked to his car.
he started the engine right away and drove to your workplace. the whole journey was quiet, as you were just looking out the window, your hands still connected with his.
“(y/n).” he finally broke the deafening silence. you looked at him and he was just staring straight ahead. you hummed, asking him if he needed something.
“is something worrying you these days? you’ve been out of yourself since last week. have i done something to offend you?” you flinched at his question, and he somehow saw it through his peripheral vision.
“am i wrong? i apologize if i'm wrong, i'm not the best at reading what others are feeling.” he apologized.
“sorry, wakatoshi. did i worry you?” you took his hands and kissed the back of it. he didn't answer, instead, he just looked at you, before gazing back at the road.
“i am worried, but you don’t have to apologize.” he uttered, driving skillfully with one hand.
‘should i tell him? it's not something worthy of his worry. in the first place, i never mentioned my father to him, even back in high school.’
you sighed deeply and looked outside and sighed again, before giving ushijima a look.
“the truth is, this week someone i never wish to come back to, ironically comes back.” you confessed, fiddling with your fingers while staring at your boyfriend.
“who is it?” he asked with his deep voice.
“i never mentioned him to you, but i'm talking about my father—” you immediately stopped talking when ushijima suddenly stepped on the brakes.
“omg! what's wrong?” you worriedly checked on him.
“your father?” was the first thing that came out of his mouth, instead of answering the question. you nodded at him and saw his hands gripping the steering wheel tighter, before running the engine on again.
“wakatoshi, what's wrong?” you leaned your head forward to him, to have a better look at his face.
“since when did he get released?” he asked.
“when i looked into it, i found out that he was dismissed last month— wait— why do you know that he's in prison?”
“you already told him about me.” he simply answered. you tilted your head trying to recall when you did that.
“i did?” you asked yourself.
“yeah.” he responded, still not breaking off his focus on the road.
“really? i don't remember…” you groaned, really not sure if you did say that.
‘maybe i'm getting old. i can't remember it.’
“what did he do this time? or is he still the same as he was?” he interrogated you, the car arrived at your agency and he parked it. he finally looked at you and clasped both of your hands between his.
‘i even told him that? really?’
“actually, he did nothing, yet. the most disturbing part is that after he called last week, he never called again.” you explained and placed your join hands on your cheeks, melting on his warm, yet calloused palms.
“did you block the number?” he asked, letting you feel the warmth of his fist, by putting his palm directly on your cheeks, even running circles on it with his thumb, with his one hand still holding both of yours.
you nodded. “yeah, that's the first thing sachiko tried to do, because i got too scared to move, but it seems like it’s from a public phone.” you answered.
“i see, do you have any idea why he didn't try to call back in another number?” you just shook your head.
“i don't know.” you shortly answered and both fell silent.
“it's fine. let's not think about that for now.” you reached for him from your seat and hugged him, and as always, he's still awkward about where to put his hands or if he should hug you back or something.
‘wakatoshi is so cute.’
when he remembered his mentor, tendou satori, said that he should always hug you back and make sure to stroke your hair too, he did it right away.
“ah, i should get going.” you broke out of the hug and looked outside. seeing the other workers for your company go into the building.
“you're right. you might get late.” he said seriously.
“yeah, i don't want to receive higo's never-ending scolding, saying i'm late again. i swear that guy is like a mom.” you ranted on your boyfriend, who's intently listening to you.
you finally opened the car's door but made sure to kiss him first before hopping off of his car. you looked through the window and smiled.
“later, wakatoshi.” you said, which he only replied with a simple ‘yeah.’. “also, thanks.”
“for what, (y/n)? i didn't give you anything.” he was extremely puzzled by your sudden appreciation.
“yeah, but that's not what i'm talking about. thanks for asking if i'm alright and listening. i feel livelier than before.” you said giving him a last smile before waving and walking to the entrance.
...
kageyama and his other teammates wonder why the olive-haired man stepped into the gym, with a small grin on his face, your smile still in his mind.
“what do you think happened to ushiwaka? he's been showing a small grin ever since he arrived.” hoshiumi asks the setter.
“who knows.” kageyama said and started dribbling the ball he's holding.
“he's been more expressive ever since he introduced the person singing from the band we're working with, that she's his girlfriend.” hirugami, their captain, chimed in. “leave him be.”
“it's (y/n) from hayashi. geez, we've been working with them for a long time and yet you don't know them, even their band name. you do know my name, right?” hoshiumi looks up at the setter giving him a suspicious look, seeking his answer.
“...hoshiumi… kourai.” kageyama answered.
“why are you so anxious to answer that?” hoshiumi shook his head.
...
“good morning!” you stepped into the studio, your bandmates looking your way.
“yo!” riku raised his one hand holding a drum stick.
“yo, riku.” you walked to him and pecked on his cheeks. yumi hugged you from behind and kissed you on the other cheeks.
“go~od morning~” she sings cheerfully and riku suddenly puts a hand on his mouth dramatically.
“what did i just hear? an angel's voice?! babe, i'll talk to higo to make you a vocalist too.” he said and was about to stand up, but yumi hastily stopped him.
“gosh, you're so in love with each other.” you laughed and walked to your band's 'evil stepmother', mori.
“hey, it's nice to see you again, mr. mori, who is always on his period.” you greeted and smooched his cheeks.
“well, good morning to you too, lowly human.” he said and showed his evil smug smile.
“lowly human?” you hit his arms playfully as you set down your things, beside him.
“look at this! how imprudent! you dared to hit me?! this is unacceptable!” he swung his hands emotionally, making you laugh harder.
after a moment of acting from mori, semi decided to go and greet you himself when he noticed something.
“hey.” he called, placing a hand on your shoulder. you turned around and said hello to him too. “did something happen?” he asked, smiling softly.
“what do you mean, eita?” you tilted your head, wondering what he meant by that.
“you're a lot more cheerful today, than the past few days. i thought you and wakatoshi fought, so i didn't pry. but now you're back to normal, which i'm thankful for, but did something happen to bring you back?” he took his hand off of your shoulder when he subconsciously was about to tuck a hair behind your ear, but noticed it then just ran it through his scalp, fixing his hair instead.
“ah... sorry, if i worry you, eita. i do have something that's troubling me,” you started and hearing the word 'troubling', he got immediately alerted. “but, wakatoshi helped me calm down and forget about it for a bit. that is a great help.” you followed, with a slight blush on your cheeks.
‘that's right, she already has wakatoshi, why am i still thinking that she needs me? i should stop.’ eita let out an awkward laugh and scratched the back of his face, while he cursed himself in his mind.
“also, he just messaged me that he wants to pick me up later and talk about what he can do to help me— eita?” you stopped talking when you looked up at him, looking dazed and out of focus.
semi blinked multiple times, before giving you a stiff smile.
“let's go start practice now, we have a small gig later, says higo.” he changed the topic and went to walk to his guitar. you agreed and started vocalising.
when the sunset came, you all started to pack your things, and travel to the place you'll perform today.
arriving there, all of you are still surprised by how many people can already recognize your band, just because of that performance in the schweiden meet and greet that went viral.
“okay, everyone let's do our best!” higo encouraged and everyone else followed.
after the performance, which took about three hours, the team immediately drove back to the building, so we can go home after.
the moment you stepped out of the car, you felt your phone vibrate. you reached for it and saw the message from ushijima.
“i'm here for you.”
you chuckled lightly at the messages.
‘maybe i should tell him to just text me next time that he's here to pick me up. the 'i'm here for you' sounds like he's trying to reassure me. but, it’s kinda cute and funny too… i guess i’ll just let him.’
you replied to him to wait for a bit because you still need to check something and clean up for a bit. after bidding goodbye to your bandmates and manager, you walked as fast as you could to the parking lot, where ushijima is waiting.
when you spot his car, you skip-walk there, happy to see your boyfriend for the nth time in your life.
“wakatoshi, hi again!” you said as you seated on the passenger seat and shyly kissed him on the cheek.
“hi to you again, (y/n).” he said as he started the engine and began driving to your home. while driving, ushijima decided to bring up the message he sent earlier.
“(y/n), about my text earlier…” he said, his eyes focused on the roadway.
“ah, yes. what about it?” you shifted your body to him, to let him know you're all ears.
“i wanted to know what i can do to help. tendou said that in a relationship, the people involved should always help each other out, he said that's what he and sachiko do to strengthen their relationship, but i am not doing this because he said that. i want to be helpful to you.” he stated straightforwardly.
“hey, don't say that. it's as if you're saying that you never aided me. you always do, okay? especially when we were in high school.” you reminded him. “well, before the fallout.” you chuckled.
“you're right, but i wanted to make up for the times where i wasn't able to help you, because of my childish action of avoiding back then.” he insisted. you smiled at him, even if you're not sure if he can see it or not.
“thanks for that, wakatoshi, but... i don't know what to do. the night he called, all my memories with him came back, sadly, they're all bad ones. i couldn't sleep, but i knew i'd make sachiko worry if i told her that, so i never did. i don't know how to make myself calm down, and the next thing i knew it was already morning.” you narrated, your face showing uncomfort.
“but, i thought that i need to face this. every problem needs a solution. even if it's scary. that's what i thought for days, but i don't know what to do.” you confessed, your voice slowly losing its volume. you looked down and tried to avert your eyes anywhere you could.
“(y/n), do you have any idea why he called you a month after he got released?” ushijima asks. you shook your head.
“i don't know. and even if i want to ask, i'm not sure if i can even face him or hear his voice.”
“there's a possibility that he wanted to speak with you, as a father.” he said.
“and there's a possibility that he wanted to speak with me, as an offender.” you debated. ushijima stayed quiet, not wanting to argue with you and make you mad.
but the silence is somehow killing him, the few moments where he can read the atmosphere, so he just thought of something to talk about.
“(y/n), would you like to go to my house and chat with my mother and grandmother? to get things out of your head even for a while?” he suggested.
“your house? hm... oka—” you weren't finished yet when ushijima added something.
“right now. you said 'okay', so i will take that as a yes.” he said and took a u-turn in his house's direction.
“what?! right now?!” you asked hysterically.
‘wait! this is too soon! i was about to say next time! wait! i'm not ready!’
‘wakatoshi!’
to be continued…
if you're interested for the next one, the whole story is already available on my patreon.
if you'd like to support me, you can also check here!
❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
i hope you enjoyed it!
they’re the type you want to just put on your palms and gaze at them lovingly the whole day. your cute aggression towards them is always tested, always having to hold back to put them inside your pocket and steal them away from the rest of the world. they always get showered with kisses and cuddles so much that there will never be a day that they wouldn’t get smothered by you. they just accepted that this is now their fate as your lover.
they wouldn’t survive the day without hearing that huff you let out when they tease you. live off from seeing your annoyed face and would lay in bed at the end of the day with a satisfied look on their face knowing they got to see the way you cutely squint your eyes and purse your lips at him again. they would always tease you, but surprisingly know their limits. smart enough to not touch the sensitive topics (ur fav character dying or ur hair not going the way u want it to).
they’re the ones who always appear so calm and composed in front of you. they’re always solving problems as soon as you lay them in front of them and ask for their help. you’ll never see him panic or stressed out over trivial pursuits, unless he was the one who made the wrong. strive on knowing you rely on him even on the smallest matters because he interprets it as you being comfortable around him enough to openly ask for his help, unlike how you are with other people.
they’re the ones who act like it’s the first day of your relationship each and every time, without fail. they always look like they would ask nervously if they could hold your hand even if you two are past that stage already. at first, they would be a mess from receiving compliments, affections, or sometimes your attention, but they’re working on it, give them time. (their reaction when they feel shy or bashful varies depending on the character)
the ‘i’m-not-sure-if-i’m-in-a-relationship-but-i-am’ type.
they’re the ones who seem like they just respawned into earth. to people who don't know them, their facial expressions look like they’re always confused and don't know they’re living. but, you know more than that. you’re aware that he cares for you deeply with the way he gazes at you, the way he touches you, the way he’ll do anything for you. they just happen to have a ‘i-don’t-know-what-i-am-doing-here’ look in his face every time you’re out together that makes people think if he’s forced to be there or was bribed by his favorite food, but you know and he knows that he’s having a blast.
they’re the super proud types. always shows you off to everyone they know, people they meet, friends they haven’t talked to for so long. they’re almost like your personal promoter, always shouting to the world how lucky they are to have you. never a chance passes when they haven't playfully complimented the way you pick your nose and call it a museum-worthy masterpiece. they’re the type to get very overly acting with you, especially when not given the desired attention from their goddess.
opening the door to the establishment, semi circled the place with his eyes searching for the person he's meeting.
spotting the individual he's looking for at the farthest table from the door. he made his way to her and sat in front of her.
“so, what do you want to talk about?” he sits down and puts on his serious face.
“now, now, mr. semi eita, cool down a bit. why don't you order something firs—”
“i'm not here for your pleasantries. just go to the point.” eita cuts her off and rests his left hand on his chin and the other on the chair's armrest.
“tsk. well, aren't you different from how you usually act in front of (y/n)?” aika puts on her bravado mode one too as she sips on her coffee. her comment raised semi's brow.
“what do you mean by that?” semi squinted his eyes, all ears on what aika would say.
“well, you see, i've researched you before coming here. when (y/n)'s around you always act like this 'you-can-always-lean-on-me' and 'good' guy.” she snickered, placing down her cup.
“ahh... so?” semi shortly answered.
aika stared at him in disbelief, she just failed to get a reaction from him. she tried to stay composed.
“what i wanted to say is that you are too shallow.” she flicked her hair and suddenly semi let out a laugh.
“haha— oh, i see what you are trying to say. so, you think (y/n) don't know that i sometimes act like this? haha! you should just go home and do better research, woman.” after laughing, he immediately reverts to him being pensive.
“what?” aika shakily questions him, completely taken aback by his sudden change of expression.
“sorry to burst your bubble, but i've been with (y/n) for four years, do you really think she won't know that?” he said, smirking. “but, i guess i can say you're right about me being the reliable and good guy in front of her, but i've always been like that with her.” he said as he ran his fingers through his hair.
“i want her to rely on me, i want to be useful to her, but i never did it because i have ill intentions, i did it simply because... i am in love with her.” he said, smiling as the memories of you together suddenly flashed in his mind.
“i don't care whatever your reason is, but i want you to be as useful to me—” aika reached for something in her bag but halted.
“why do i need to treat you like how i treat the person i cherish the most? you're not (y/n).” semi looked at her blankly.
“i can treat you just like how i treat others but expect too much. i don't like how you act and look towards (y/n). be careful, you.” he added, glaring at her.
‘tsk. i know. damn, whenever or wherever, it's always that damn (y/n)! what's so different about her? she's not that special!’
aika gritted her teeth and exhaled frustratedly.
“so, just as i asked, what do you want to discuss?” semi thanked the waitress who brought his order by smiling and muttering 'thank you', the woman almost died.
“just as i said yesterday, i want wakatoshi and you want (y/n), right?” she started, semi didn't reply, so she just continued.
“what i wanted to happen is for them to break up and wakatoshi will end up with me and (y/n) will be yours.” she smiled mischievously.
she’s aware of what semi desires and it's the same as hers. she knows that semi wants you more than anything else and she was ‘sure’ that semi will agree to her plan.
“so, i was thinking of making one of them think that the other is cheating on them—” aika stopped when semi suddenly sighed heavily.
“jeez. and here i thought, it would be a clean and formal plan. damn.” he shook his head sideways and reached to sip on his drink.
“what do you mean by that?” aika asked him and semi just gave him a pitying look.
“you... do you really love wakatoshi?” he asked that caught aika off guard, making her flustered.
“o-of course, i do! i wouldn't be doing this if i didn't!” she defended herself.
“then why are you making that kind of plan?” he looked at her seriously.
“huh? like i said because i love him—”
“you do? then, did you think about his feelings?” he cut off.
“what?” aika muttered.
“you see,” semi followed. “the reason i came here is that i thought you have something rightful and proper, some idea that maybe i just haven’t thought of yet and it turns out your strategy is something like that plotting and framing.” semi leaned over aika from his seat.
“just so you know, i love (y/n). that means her happiness is my priority and if that happiness of hers would be taken away because of my selfish desire, i would rather watch her with wakatoshi than see her crying and in pain.” he placed his pay on the table and stood.
“coming here is a waste of time and gas.” he said and was about to walk.
“then, if i can make (y/n) think that she'll be better by your side than wakatoshi, will you change your mind and help me?” aika suggested, trying her best to have someone who knows a lot about you and use it against you.
“sorry to tell you, but i've already tried that. i tried that for four years straight.” he said with a pained smile.
‘four years? that's the same stretch he's with (y/n)?’
“for that long and yet, i still lost her.” he felt like his voice almost cracked. “i’ve always been battling with wakatoshi, even if i knew it’s a losing match. i was just a huge jerk for not accepting the transparent answer. well, then, bye.”
with that, semi left the building and drove back home. his hands gripping the steering wheel like it's going to disappear.
‘i never won against wakatoshi. eita, you bummer.’ semi shook his head sideways and cleared his mind.
“i guess, i should visit my family since i already placed my leave today and i don't have anything to do.” he speaks to himself and hits the gas pedal.
…
“go, adlers!”
“you can do it, alders!”
“beat them, raijin!”
‘wow, so loud!’
you were watching a match between schweiden adlers and ejp raijin. you just finished your practice and immediately went to the stadium as soon as it ended. finding a seat in the stands, you scanned the floor for ushijima. the second set just ended and the adlers won both the sets.
‘ah! there he is! wakatoshi!’
as if someone told him you were there, he looked directly where you were, holding his water bottle and a towel on his shoulder.
“look! ushiwaka's looking at us!”
“let's wave at him!” said the two girls behind me.
from our seats, you can see the small smile that crept on wakatoshi's face when your eyes met.
“kyaa! he's smiling at me!”
“no! he's clearly smiling at me!”
‘no, you don't have to fight. it was mine anyways.’ even after years of no exposure to volleyball, you were surprised of yourself that you still know how it works.
‘the last time i watched a volleyball match was when we met for the first time in a long time. i wasn't focused on the game too much, because my attention is on wakatoshi.’
‘that day is also the day i met aika. if eita didn't force me to come, i wouldn't have met her, but if i didn't come, then i wouldn't have rekindled our relationship.’
‘i should really thank eita.’
after the game, you immediately stood up to go and meet with ushijima. the game ended by 3-1, in favour of adlers.
you messaged ushijima that you'll be waiting for him near the main door, but as you walked there someone came up to me and asked for a photograph, you nervously accepted.
‘woah. i'm not used to this yet! i can't believe someone actually knows me!’
“thank you!” the person thanked and bowed. you exchanged bows with her and then bid goodbye.
when you turned around to continue to wait for ushijima, your eyes quickly squinted just by the sight of her.
“what are you doing here? this isn't a place for your disgusting voice, you should be in a soundproof room.” she asked, her rude attitude flowing out.
“well, i'm here to watch my boyfriend. what about you? why are you here? aren't the garbage cans over there?” you said pointing to the trash can.
“huh?!” aika gritted her teeth and clenched her fist.
she was about to talk back, but then she remembered what semi said earlier.
‘...her happiness is my priority and if that happiness of hers would be taken away because of my selfish desire, then i would rather watch her with wakatoshi than see her crying…’
you got weirded out when you noticed her staring at you for too long, but you received a message from ushijima saying that he's already there.
you glanced at aika and she's still staring, so you just decided to go and meet ushijima. aika just stared at your form from behind while thinking:
‘semi, if that's how you love someone, then i guess i can't do anything about it, but not everyone's the same.’
‘i will choose not to pay attention to what you said and will do everything to get wakatoshi.’
‘it’s fine that you’re not going to help me, but don’t ever get in my way.’
‘that's how i love someone, completely different from yours, semi eita.’
“(y/n), i'll make sure you will forever regret stealing ushijima from me.”
...
“i'm home.” you said as you closed the door behind you.
when you entered the living room, you saw sachiko's head peeking from the kitchen, so you went there and smelled the aroma of the curry she's cooking. your mouth watered and your eyes shined just by looking at it.
“took you a while today. did you have so much fun with wakatoshi that you forgot the time? must've been nice! going out with your boyfriend!” her voice was so happy but her face isn't, she's giving you a knowing look.
you rolled your eyes and she just laughed her ass off, knowing she can tease you all she wants, considering she knows a lot about wakatoshi and you.
*ring*
“i'll go get it.” you volunteered and walked to your house's phone.
*ring*
“okay, okay. wait.” you said speed-walking, even though you're talking to no one. you cleared your throat first and picked up the call.
“hello?”
“ah. hello? is this (l/n) (f/n)'s resindenc—”
you immediately cut off the call with shaky hands, your eyes widened and your heart beating out of your chest.
‘that voice... i won't forget that raspy voice of his.’
suddenly, everything came back. the past that you’ve desperately trying to move on from.
“who was it?” you jumped when sachiko suddenly talked behind you.
she wondered why you didn't answer, so she walked to face you and she immediately put her palms on your cheeks.
“hey, what's wrong?” she asked as soon as she saw your terrified face.
“he's... he's back... dad.”
on the other line is someone with a smile smeared on his face. he grips on the public pay phone's handset tightly, almost breaking it.
“found you, (y/n).”
to be continued…
if you're interested for the next one, the whole story is already available on my patreon.
if you'd like to support me, you can also check here!
❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
i hope you enjoyed it!
“mother, i have something to discuss with you.” ushijima stated as soon as he entered the living room.
both his mother and grandmother looked at him, surprised. mainly, because he usually just greets them and goes to his room to read some of his volleyball magazines or get ready to go for a jog, whenever he comes home.
but this time, he made his way all to them. his mother already knows this is serious business.
the younger woman politely told the older woman that she'll be talking with ushijima in the kitchen for a bit. they both went to the house's canteen and she quickly asked ushijima what he wanted to say.
“what is it, wakatoshi?” she questioned his son.
“i'm going to end the pseudo-relationship with aika.” he calmly stated.
“what?” his mother furrowed her brows.
“i want to end my fake relationship with aika.” he repeated, completely misunderstood what her mother just asked.
“no, i'm not asking for you to repeat it.” she cleared.
“oh. i see.” he shortly answered.
“what i wanted to know is the reason?” she asked, clearly not happy one bit about what his son was saying.
“the reason? (y/n).” he said casually.
“(y/n)? that girl again?!” she said in displease, throwing her hands in the air.
“yes, but ‘that girl’ is now my lover.” he said not minding the surprised look on his mother.
“your girl? hah. are you kidding me?” she asks as if she's praying for her son to answer that it is indeed a joke, but the straight face ushijima is wearing is enough for her to know that he's not. she immediately put on a profound look.
“why? aika has always been there for you. she's a very beautiful girl, why don't you just pick her?”
on the other hand, aika, who always tries to visit ushijima's mother and grandmother, came at a terrible time. since she was already given consent by the mother, she just went inside not bothering to knock or ring the doorbell.
she went straight to the living room, where she always knows where the two older are, but this time she only found ushijima's grandmother. she grimaced knowing she doesn't have the best relationship with the elder, but still wants to gain her favour.
“good morning, grandma.” she greeted her, not wanting to look rude. the aged woman just adjusted her eyes to her and lifted her brow one time to recognize her presence.
aika holding her gift, fruits, looked around and searched for the mother.
“um, can i ask where mother is?” she asked, trying to sound as polite as possible.
“in the kitchen, also i don't recall you being my grandchild.” she said nonchalantly while looking at the tv.
“ah... umm... i'll place this in the pantry too. excuse me.” she said and walked to the kitchen. she was thinking about what to serve the aged woman.
“why? aika has always been there for you. she's a beautiful girl, why don't you just pick her?”
she halted her walking when she heard her name. she peeked a bit. she saw the mother and son facing each other, with a heavy atmosphere.
“i won't pick someone just because of their face. i want to be with someone whom my heart beats for. and that happens to be (y/n), not aika. she never was.” he said, was unaware of the presence of the girl he talked about, yet she decided to show herself to them.
“why...?”
the two ushijima look at her. one surprised by her sudden appearance, and one the same stoic face as always.
“why (y/n)?” aika uttered as he looked at ushijima with wide eyes. her hurt was evident on her face.
“why that (y/n), who broke your heart by getting together with one of your best friends?” she asked, her voice slowly getting louder.
ushijima raised his one brow, while ushijima's mother went close to her to try and calm her down, but to no avail.
“why that (y/n), who barely remembers you from your childhood?!” she shouted.
ushijima’s eyes narrowed at what she said, finally giving a reaction.
“why do you know that?” he asked with a voice that can kill.
both the two women stayed quiet and ushijima quickly knew who told it. even if ushijima sucks at studying, he's not that stupid to not understand this.
he squinted his eyes and let out a breath, in frustration.
“i'm not going to change my mind. i'm going to end this facade.” he exclaimed, not backing down.
aika just stared at the ground, while his mother gently stroked her back. suddenly, her shoulders relaxed and she let out a sigh.
“okay, i got it.” she answered.
ushijima was a bit skeptical as to why she’s suddenly being pliant, but he just pushed his suspicion aside.
“then everything is settled. be sure to tell that to your mother too.” he said and moved to go to his grandma, but stopped for a bit when aika spoke.
“but, let me have some time to tell it to my friends and colleagues. they all think we’re for real after all.” she muttered.
ushijima wanted to ask why she needed to tell them about the fake relationship in the first place, but decided not to since it'll be ending soon.
when he reached the living room, he saw his grandmother laughing at the show flashed on the tv screen. he sat down beside her and she quickly shifted her attention to her grandson.
“did you and your mother finish talking already?” she asked sweetly, locking his right hand between her palms. ushijima just nodded with a small smile.
he then placed his other hand on top of his grandma's.
“grandma, i have great news.” he said.
“what is it?” she inquired with a loving voice.
“(y/n) and i am together now.” he announced, but his grandmother just tilted her head sideways.
“(y/n)? (y/n)...? you mean the little girl that always plays with you back in the day?” she asked. her voice slowly getting excited, ushijima answered with a nod once again.
“really? oh my, i'm so happy. little (y/n) was so charming and sweet. i am sure she has grown to be a proper and beautiful lady, right?” she affirmed.
“she indeed became one, grandma, but she has always been one.” he answered, his grandmother just grinned, thinking how she could see hearts in his eyes.
“when is she coming over? i wanna see the beautiful (y/n).” she asked.
“i am not sure. i haven't asked her yet. she told me that she wants to take it slowly.” he explained to her, and she just gave him a closed-eyed smile.
“is that so? then, i'll eagerly await for her.”
just around the corner is aika, who was about to head out, but since she needed to pass through the living room, she unintentionally overheard the conversation.
‘what is that? she was never that excited whenever i came over! also, why does she love that (y/n) so much?!’
‘always that damn (y/n)!’
...
“achoo!” your sneeze rings out throughout the room. you vigorously wiped your nose with the help of your long sleeves as it was too itchy to wait, but you were quickly stopped by someone grabbing your hands.
“hey, you're going to hurt your nose if you do that.” eita said as he grabbed something from his back pocket. “look, your nose is already red.” he said as he was about to help you and wipe your nose for you, but he decided to just hand you the tissue.
“sorry, thanks.” you smiled, wiping your nose.
“(y/n), you okay?” riku asked as he drank his water.
“did you catch a cold yesterday? we did go home pretty late.” yumi recalled as she walked to you and semi.
“i wanna say that you deserve it because you didn't invite us to the theme park, but i don't wanna look like a rude person.” mori said, shrugging his shoulders.
“but, you are a rude person.” the couple side comments.
“well, thanks for the thought, mr. not so rude, mori-sama, but i'm fine. thanks, eita.” you thanked him. he just mouthed ‘it's nothing.’ with a mocking smile.
“speaking of which, congratulations, (y/n).” the leader said while giving you a teasing look. you tilted your head sideways in confusion.
“for?” you asked.
“for your relationship with the mighty ushijima wakatoshi!” he said, still has the teasing look as he wiggles his eyebrows up and down, pointing his drum sticks to you.
“t-thanks.” you said looking away at them, because of your blushing face.
“(y/n).” you looked up where the voice came from and saw higo at the door, calling you. you went to him and asked him why.
“our bosses wanted to talk to you.” he informed you. you just nodded and told your bandmates why you're leaving. “everyone, you can take a break if you want to.” he added.
“okay!” they all answered and you and higo left.
they all fall silent once you two depart. the three others landed their gaze on their guitarist, who's still looking at the door where you were earlier.
“eita…” yumi called. semi looked at her, smiling.
“hm? what is it?” he asked as if he didn't know what they're about to say.
he picked up his guitar and plugged it into the amp.
“are you okay?” riku asked. “sorry, you're both my friends and bandmates. i'm still happy for her, sorry.” he apologized.
“i know, i know, riku. you don't have to apologize.” semi said, playing some chords. “but, i don't know if i can answer the first question. haha.”
“what do you mean by that?” mori asked.
“i don't know either.” he replied and made an unpleasant sound from his guitar. “well, i'll try to get my shit together, so don't worry.” he said and focused on playing with his guitar.
‘our semi eita just cursed. is it really okay?’ the three others thought.
…
“then, i'll go on ahead.” semi bid farewell and left the building. their practice just finished and he immediately departed the place as soon as he said goodbye to everyone. you were surprised as to why he’s suddenly going home first, when he’s usually waiting for you, but you just shrugged thinking he’s going somewhere.
when he reached the parking lot to ride his car, he heard someone's footsteps walking closer to him.
“you're semi eita, right?” a voice said.
he turned around to see who was talking only to be greeted by a woman with her hands resting on her hips.
“um... who?” he asked, scratching the back of his head.
“suzuki aika.” she answered, crossing her arms on her chest.
“okay...? suzuki, are you a fan of ours?” semi questioned wanting to go home already. “do you want an autograph?”
“of course not. i'm not a fan of your stupid little band.” she said with disgust. semi narrowed his eyes with her comment.
‘jeez, what a rude person. huh? wait, if i'm right… she was the one who called wakatoshi "babe", right? well, not that i care.’
“then, i need to go home now. excuse me.” he said and readied himself to drive. he was about to close the doors when she said something.
“you. you love her, right? that woman, (y/n).”
he halted on his feet and quickly looked back at the woman as soon as she said your name.
“no, more like, you want her back to you, right?” she said with a smug look on her face.
“what do you want?” he asked with a guarded voice.
“i want wakatoshi, and you want (y/n). i don't need further explanation, right?”
…
“well, see you tomorrow, (y/n)-baby!” yumi waved to you. you waved back at her and smiled at her. riku waving his hands to you too just beside yumi.
since eita and mori already went on ahead and the two lovers are going in a different direction, you know you'll go home alone today.
just as you were about to start walking to the station, you suddenly felt your phone vibrate. you searched for it in your bag and looked at the messages.
your heart went wild when you saw who the sender was.
‘oh gosh. oh gosh. he just sent you a message, no need to be so anxious! (y/n), calm down!’
you took a deep breath and read the message from wakatoshi. you almost slapped yourself for shaking, in nervousness? in excitement? who knows?
all you’re thinking about is what wakatoshi meant by his message.
it was just a short: ‘(y/n), i'm here for you.’
“uhm… thanks, i guess..?” you were wondering what he means by that. you quickly replied to him asking him what he meant by that, but he didn't answer.
“what does he mean by ‘i'm here for you.’?” you asked yourself, perplexed, scratching your head.
“it means exactly as it is, (y/n).”
you jumped slightly and turned around to find the tall olive-coloured haired guy behind you.
“gosh, wakatoshi! why do you always pop out of nowhere?!” you told him with a higher pitch voice, while your hands are on your chest trying to calm down your heart. he looked at you wondering what you meant by that. you sighed in defeat.
“remember when we were at old man okamura's shop? you suddenly showed up there. also, yesterday, you appeared when i was about to fall and led me out of the crowd. i mean, i'm thankful but you always show up out of nowhere.” you explained to him.
“but, i am certain i sent you a message beforehand.” he said matter-of-factly.
‘ah. so that's what he means by that…’ you just shook your head sideways and looked him straight in the eyes.
“why are you here? how about your volleyball practice? don't you have a game tomorrow?” you asked, changing the topic.
“yes, but the coach let us out early, for personal reasons. that's why i decided to pick you up from your work.” he said and extended his hands. you looked at him like asking him what he wants. “tendou said i shouldn't let my partner hold things, and i should do it every chance i can.”
you can feel your face getting hot, so you immediately looked down, and just decided to let him hold your bag.
‘what the hell is satori teaching this guy?!’
“shall i drive you home now?” he asked, you glanced at him and just nodded. he walked to the side road and stopped in front of a car. he opened the car's door, beside the driver seat.
you were surprised at first but hopped inside. you put on the seatbelt and looked around in the car. he soon went in too and noticed how your eyes were wandering.
“i saved up my money to pay for this, it was definitely worth working hard for.” he said starting the engine.
“really? why?” you asked him.
“because now i can drive you home. i won't be worried if you arrived home safely or something like that. every day, i was like that. you might think i am too full of myself to think like that, considering how immature of me to suddenly end our friendship back in high school in a blink of an eye, but i always do think about you.”
“huh?” you let out when he suddenly talked about how he feels. he just answered your questions, looking straight at the road.
“back then, whenever i would always watch you and semi from afar, my thoughts would suddenly eat me. i would think ‘is she happy with semi?’, ‘do semi treat her well?’, ‘why am i always thinking about (y/n)?’, ‘i shouldn't be, i should be just happy for her and forget about how i feel.’” i just watched him from the side as he talked.
‘wakatoshi is actually opening up... this is rarer than seeing him smile. this means everything he is saying is true, right? i hope so…’
“that was what i was thinking, but i never thought my heart would betray me. i can't seem to get over it, maybe because i was still a kid. my heart keeps beating for you.
every time i see you, my heart skips a beat, even though semi is beside you.
every time i see you in the bleachers, my heart wants to get out of my chest, even though i know you're cheering for semi.
every time i see you smile, i want to keep you in my arms... but semi already got his wrapped around you.” he said and hit the brakes when there was a traffic light.
your eyes fell into his brown piercing eyes. he took your hands resting on your lap, holding it tightly, not breaking off the stare.
“i was very hurt, but i can't seem to grow resentful towards both of you. i can't hate semi, my teammate and friend who's always been there for me. especially you. the woman i have loved ever since.” he finally let go of your hands when the lights turned green. you looked outside and stared at the surroundings as the car passed by on the way to your apartment.
‘this is... how he felt all those years. why didn't i notice? was i not paying attention to him enough?’
“d-did satori told you to say that too?” you asked, not looking at him.
he didn't answer and instead just drove faster, not breaking the speed limit.
when you arrived in front of the apartment, he parked the car and then he stepped out, you also did the same. the two of you walked to your place and stopped in front of the door.
“thanks for the ride, wakatoshi.” you thanked him, smiling at him.
“no. it's my pleasure. do you mind if i pick you up tomorrow too?” he asked, keeping his stoic face. you just nodded at him, smiling to say yes. “also…”
“tendou didn't tell me to say that.” he stated. “but he did tell me to tell you this.”
“tell me?” you leaned your head towards him when he asked you to come close.
“actually, not ‘tell’. he told me to do this…”
“do wha—” before you could even finish, you felt his lips grazed on your cheeks.
you immediately placed a hand on the cheek he kissed. looking at him, your blood rose to your cheeks.
“tendou was right.” he uttered, staring at your reaction with a faint smile. “he said that you'll be surprised if i do that.” he said standing in front of him like he didn't do some stunt just a few seconds ago.
“i'll be going now. have a nice day, (y/n).” he said. still surprised by what he just did, you only managed to nod at him and opened the door to the apartment. you gave him one last bow before completely going inside.
behind the door, you can hear his footsteps slowly getting quieter. when you were sure he already left, you quickly ran inside and went to sachiko's room. you flung the door open and saw her scrolling through her phone on her bed.
“sachiko!” you shouted her name, she looked at you surprised.
“w-what?” she asked, weirded out by how you were acting. you ran to her and put your hands on both her arms.
“tell your boyfriend to shut his damn mouth and stop feeding wakatoshi with ideas. please, i’ll die.” you said with a serious face, despite the color of your face.
“what? wait, why are you so red?”
“just tell him that. please, because i might die from embarrassment.” you said and sat on the edge of the bed.
“what is wrong with you? did you eat already?” she asked with a furrowed brow.
“no, i haven't.” you answered and put a hand on your tummy.
“maybe that’s why you’re active like that. let's order take-outs. i'm too tired to cook.” she said and you agreed. you both went to the kitchen.
...
the next day, you were on your way to practice, a coffee in one hand and your phone on the other.
“hey…” you greeted as you entered the studio.
“hi, baby.” yumi replied, smiling. riku just hummed and waved at you, while mori just looked at you and when you looked back at him, he rolled his eyes.
“wow.” you said laughing, while he laughed at his own antics.
you scanned around and noticed that semi wasn't there yet.
“where's eita?” you asked.
“maybe he's late again.” riku said.
when the door opened, you thought it was semi, but turned out to be higo.
“good morning, higo.”
“good morning, (y/n). everyone.” he greeted, fixing his glasses with his index finger.
all of you circled him and he started to announce the schedule for today.
“also, eita took a day off today. he said he needs to meet someone.”
“oh…”
‘day off? he usually messages me to let me know, is it an emergency? i hope he's alright.’
to be continued…
if you're interested for the next one, the whole story is already available on my patreon.
if you'd like to support me, you can also check here!
❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
i hope you enjoyed it!
he turned to a corner and there he finally let go of your wrist and faced you. he was wearing casual clothes, an apricot-colored blouson on top of a black shirt, jeans and a cap. it provides an efficient cover for his famous face, but his large body might still attract some of people's attention.
“wa— ushijima, what are you doing here?” you asked him.
“aika wanted to visit here, so my mom forced me to come with her,” he explained.
“o-oh, so you were on a date with your fiancé, s-sorry for interrupting your date, but thank you so much for saving me from that fall and dragging me away to the crowd. thank you. well, excuse me—”
before you can even finish saying goodbye to ushijima, your phone rang and showed that sachiko was calling. you quickly answered it, and put it on your ears, your back facing him.
“sachiko, where are you? are you with yumi?” you questioned her,
“the question is where are you?! you suddenly walked off with a suspicious guy and now we can't find you!”
“well, about that suspicious guy…”
“what?! did he do something to you?! should we call the police?!”
“no, there's no need for that—”
“hello, sachiko.”
“wakatoshi?!”
you jumped slightly when ushijima suddenly talked, but that's not all.
‘i can feel his breath. too close.’
he noticed how you suddenly became quiet, he looked at you, and oh, how you wish you could die right now.
“sachiko, there's no need to call for the police, but i think you should call the hospital. (y/n) is red, i think she's sick, we should take her to the hospital.” he said.
‘i swear i can hear sachiko's evil laugh.’
“oh my? is she red? why don't you check if she's sick? do that thing you know, when you check someone's temperature, you put your forehead against them.”
‘what are you saying?!’
“okay, i got it.”
‘no, don't go agreeing to sachiko's desire, you know how devilish she can be!’
“well, excuse me (y/n).”
“wha— wait!”
not that you can do anything now, his forehead is already on yours.
‘close your eyes! yeah, let's just close our eyes!’
“sachiko, i don't think (y/n) is sick, but she's a lot redder now.” he concluded.
“oh, is that so?”
you cleared your throat and tried to calm yourself down.
“sachiko, tell me where you and yumi are, and—”
“no, i and yumi can manage and visit the rides i want to visit, how about you and wakatoshi go and ride the attractions? okay? okay. bye!”
‘huh?! wait! wakatoshi is on a date! what is she saying?!’
“sorry, sachiko was speaking nonsense again.’
“it's fine, she's always been like that, she always says what's on her mind.”
“pfft. right? so, don't mind what she just said. you can go with your aika and continue your date.”
“no, aika was phoned by her father saying she needs to be in the company as soon as possible, so she left already. i was just walking around, looking for something entertaining, and then i crossed paths with you.”
“ah.”
“so, i don't mind riding the attractions with you.”
…
‘i thought this day was supposed to be girls' day?’
‘why did sachiko make me go with wakatoshi?’
“(y/n)... (y/n)...”
‘in the first place, she knows i'm still conscious with talking with—’
“(y/n). are you alright?”
“huh? yeah! sorry, were you saying something?” you asked him, chuckling stiffly.
“i was asking if you wanted to try that cotton candy. it seems popular with females.” he said looking at something. you followed where his gaze was leading and saw a cotton candy stall surrounded by children, well, yeah, mostly girls.
“no, you said popular with females, but they're little girls. do i look like a little girl to you?” you uttered as you stared at the kids excitedly waiting for their turn to get the food.
“don't you want to try that?” he asked sincerely. you sighed deeply with resignation.
“okay, okay. let's go get some.” you said and then walked to the stall. they lined up to the queue and gained some of the little one's attention.
“wah! onee-chan and onii-chan wanted the cotton candy, even though it's for kids!” one boy said, pointing at your way with honest astonishment.
‘that's a kid. it's a kid.’
before you could even reply to the kid, wakatoshi leaned down to him, almost unintentionally scaring him.
“it wasn't said that it's only for kids.” he replied, matter-of-factly.
“wait, ushijima—” you wanted to pull him back and give the frightened boy space from him.
“sorry.” the boy apologized, almost crying and went back to his parents.
“gosh, you scared him, ushijima,” you said, following the boy with your eyes.
you were answered by silence from him, so you looked at him and he was staring at you.
ushijima narrowed his eyes as he looked at you. there was that name again. it felt so distant hearing you call him like that. why are you calling him that? he wanted to know why.
“why are you calling me 'ushijima', (y/n)?” he questioned with a serious tone.
“huh? uh... i thought you won't like it if i call you by your first name—”
“but, you always call me like that back in the days.” he said, straight-facedly. his brows formed a crease on his forehead. he was genuinely confused why you’re calling him like that and not like how you used to call him in the past.
“yeah, but you suddenly avoided me back then too, so i don't know if i'll make you feel uncomfortable if i call you like that again,” you explained.
“oh.” he stared at you for a moment, realization hitting him like a volleyball in the face. “so, this is my fault. i apologize for my past actions.” he said and bowed.
“no, it's fine. it's fine, w-wakatoshi.” you muttered while waving your hands, asking him to lift his head.
when he did, it seemed like he liked it when you called him 'wakatoshi' once again, enough for his lips to form a smile.
‘damn. so handsome.’
“here's your order, ma'am, sir.” the guy selling the cotton candy said, stealing your attention from each other. ushijima took it from him and paid him. you didn't get to complain, since the seller already gave him the change.
“thanks for that, wakatoshi,” you said as you walked to a nearby bench and took a seat.
he took a seat next to you, his eyes fixated on the sugary dessert on his hand, wondering if this will ruin his diet. ushijima glared at it, as if the food would talk to him and tell him the answers. after a second, he just held the cotton candy tightly and just focused on you beside him, after a long time.
“i'm glad that you are able to call me like that again, because today is special, considering this is our first date.” he said with a small smile that could easily be missed by normal people.
“yeah, it’s goo— wait, what?” you almost missed what he said and immediately looked at him with a baffled face.
‘no, i probably just misheard things, haha.’
“i'm glad you called me like how you used to.” he repeated, nonchalantly, still holding the cotton candy.
“no, no, no. the last part.” you said clutching on the food you were currently holding.
“that this is a special day because this is our first date.” he said calmly.
‘i didn't misheard it! he really said that! what is happening?’
“w-what do you mean by that, wakatoshi? first date? haha…” you asked, hoping that it's just a misunderstanding.
“if a man and woman go out together, it's called a date. so this one is the what-so-named 'date', right?” he questioned earnestly.
‘oh gosh... he actually meant it… he actually thinks this is a date… though, how i wish i could say ‘yes!’, but…’
“no, wakatoshi. you're not wrong, but you're not right either. it's only considered a date when the one person involved asked them out, and the latter agreed, so—” you shook your head as you talked, hoping he would understand.
“so, (y/n). would you like to go out with me?” he interrupted as soon as he heard you explain it.
“huh?” you looked at him with even more muddled expression.
“did i not execute it properly? let me redo it.” he said and stood up, you watched him with eyes wide open from surprise.
he moved in front of you, his face determined. he let out a deep exhale before speaking.
“(l/n) (f/n), will you give me permission to be your lover?” he said and extended his arms out to you.
his face stoic as usual, yet there was an underlying nervousness both of you couldn’t explain. he stood there, in front of you with his arm stretched out. the happy faces of kids, families, friends, behind him was the opposite of the complicated atmosphere surrounding the bench where you two are.
you stared at him with disbelief.
‘wait... is this real?’
‘wakatoshi is in front of me, asking me to go out with him?’
‘i'm not dreaming, right? right? oh. wait wait wait. no, no, no, no.’
you took a deep breath and looked him in the eyes. “sorry, wakatoshi. i don't know if you're being serious right now, but i can't— no, you can’t.”
‘i want to, wakatoshi, but i can't.’
he furrowed his brows, after what you said. you stood up too and placed the cotton candy on the bench. you inhaled, gathering your thoughts.
“no, wakatoshi. this is wrong.” you said, clasping your handbag tightly as though keeping your rationality in line and holding back from what you actually want to.
“what is? me asking you to be my girlfriend?” he asked, still extending his arms.
“you already have someone on your side. no matter what your reasons are... you're... you're being unfaithful to her.” you uttered, your voice rough as you sighed. “i know aika hasn't been the nicest with our last three encounters together, but i don't think this is right.” you looked down and fiddled with your fingers. you sighed deeply again.
“s-sorry, wakatoshi. thanks for the cotton candy and today, but i need to go now. see you later.” you excused yourself and bowed, turning around and started to walk away.
‘i want to... i really want to... i guess this is what they said that you can't have everything you wanted.’
“if i told you that everything about me and aika is fake…” he started, and you just found yourself stopping. “that aika is my partner just for the public, would you change your mind?”
‘huh?’
you looked back at him.
‘his stoic face... it's not stoic at all, right now. he looked a bit worried and... hurt. when was the last time i saw him show that expression?’
“will you, (y/n)?” he asked, his voice rough with desperation. “please…”
“i don't understand what you are saying right now, wakatoshi,” you said, your voice shaking with confusion. “wha… what do you mean? what do you mean fake? what do you mean for the public?”
“aika is a person my mother asked— no, pushed, to act as my significant other in front of the fans and media, but when there's no media or fans, she's just someone i know.” he replied with sincerity.
“act… why do you have to act as if she's your partner?” you asked.
he walked up to you, took your hands in his and made you look into his eyes with his other, by gripping your chin between his thumb and index finger.
“my mother forced me to agree to it. aika is... my mother and her mother are good friends. they wanted us to be in a relationship for so long, but i always decline it each time they bring up the topic, but my decision changed one day back in our second year of high school.” he explained, his deep voice making your spine shiver.
‘second year of high school…?’
“why? because you fell in love with her?” you scoffed, yet your voice was filled with vulnerability. you stare at his eyes, seemingly searching for an answer, your head subconsciously leaning towards his touch on your chin.
“no, it was because you fell in love with semi.” he answered.
“huh? what…” your eyes widened at his revelation.
“it was painful. watching you with semi.” his grip on your wrist tightened a bit, but not hurting still.
“wakatoshi—”
“allow me to continue. i beg you. please let me explain.” he pleaded, his face different from his usual self.
you just nodded, slowly. “everyday, i see you with semi. seeing how you look at him, when it’s how i dreamed you would be if ever you’re with me. every day, it just aches me more. so, my will wavered when my mom asked me again concerning aika, and i agreed. i thought it would make me forget about you.”
he looked down and let out a shaky breath. “but, i realized… i was actually just trying to get back at you, trying to make you regret your choice for going out with semi. when i realized that, i stopped caring about my feelings that were hurt when you got together with him. i just want to be with you.”
“i… love you too much to care about how it hurts me. i just wanted to see you. i wanted to see your smile again, even if it was semi who was the cause of it. i was content watching silently from afar. watching you with your gigs through my phone. i decided to leave you both alone for years. i thought i was content with that. that i was satisfied. until…”
he stopped to move his hand from your chin to cup your cheeks, his calloused hands from years of playing volleyball, seemingly soft against your skin.
“until, semi brought you along to our game with the jackals. i’ve only given five tickets to my friends, reon, semi, and shirabu, and my former coach and his wife. when shirabu was not able to come, i thought someone else would come, maybe yamagata or tsutomu. but, when i saw you sitting next to semi when the match was about to start… that’s when i realized… i really couldn’t stop loving you from afar.” he looked at you again, his eyes full of sadness.
“what’s more, i was overjoyed when you said you’re not with semi anymore. i thought it’s my chance to win you over. i was selfish and didn’t think about how you feel. i’m sorry… but, i’ve gotten so desperate for you. i can’t wait any longer after all these years. i don’t want to let you slip out of my reach again.”
“nonetheless, i still let aika act as my fiance in public. i should’ve been stronger, but my resolution wavered because i was hurt. i apologize for breaking our promise.”
‘huh? our promise? what promise…?’
“(y/n).” he called.
“hm?”
“did that change your mind? will you go out with me now?” he asked again.
“wait. i just learned all of this, i— i need to think about it—” you stuttered, raising your hands in front of you in surrender.
“why do you need to think about it? don't you feel the same as me?”
‘is he asking me or mocking me?!’
“i-i do, but—” you turned my focus from him to the bushes.
“then, why don't you accept it? is there a reason you're not accepting it? that's right.”
“huh?” i looked back at him, noting how he looked like he remembered something.
he cleared his throat.
“i am currently ‘single and ready to mingle’.”
“what the—?” you were surprised by what he just said, as he's not the person to say that, but then remembered someone. you put your hand on your head as you shook it sideways. “did... did satori tell you that?” you asked in disbelief.
“yes, when i called him the other day. he told me that i am a ‘single and ready to mingle’ person.” he answered nonchalantly.
‘what the hell is that guy doing?!’
“one more thing he said…”
your thoughts were distracted when he suddenly walked a step closer to you, to your ears.
“he told me to do this, in an unexpected moment.” he said as his left hand went to take your right one and his other arm was on your waist.
you were too dumbfounded to even react to whatever was happening.
“(y/n).” he uttered.
“yes?!” you anxiously answered.
he looked you straight in the eyes, it feels like you aren't supposed to look away from his olive-coloured eyes. he raised your hand to his lips and kissed the back of it, while massaging it with his calloused thumb, still focusing his eyes on yours.
“wa-wakatoshi?” you called him.
you knew that your face was all surprised and red, you tried your best to look away from his gaze, but it only got redder when you saw all the people looking at you.
“wakatoshi, they're looking at us,” i said embarrassed.
“i'm not paying attention to them right now. i only see you.”
‘damn! stop it! your voice is too deep, my heart can't take it!’
‘also! your lips are still on my hands!’
“(y/n)...”
‘stop it!’
“okay! that's enough!”
after hearing it, you both looked at your side and saw sachiko with the ‘i'm-so-done’ look on her face, beside her is yumi looking so happy looking at both you and ushijima.
you quickly snatched your hands from his and tried to compose yourself.
“what? what? (y/n) isn't this one of the guys we are working with? ah! he's also the one you were talking to backstage the last time!” she said excitedly. “hello! i'm sato yumi, i'm not sure if you know me, but i wor—”
“i am aware of who you are, i try my best to remember (y/n)'s close friends and bandmates.” he calmly said.
“that's not important for now, what were you two doing earlier? you guys are attracting too much attention. yumi and (y/n) need to keep it low-key, you know? but here are you two doing something like you two are a couple.” she said as she angrily sipped on her shake.
“but, that's exactly what we are doing. i was asking (y/n) to give me the permission to take her out on a date.” he bluntly said. sachiko and yumi got quiet for a bit. you just closed your eyes, because of ushijima not possessing the ability to read the room.
“what?!”
“wait! omg! is that true?!” sachiko frantically asked, while yumi squealed in exhilaration. you look away as you slowly nod.
“so we were disturbing you two?! sorry!” sachiko grinned, covering her mouth.
“yeah, you did.” he said directly.
“it's fine. it's fine. how about we just continue wit—” you tried to interject and focus on going around the park.
“(y/n), you haven't given me an answer yet.” ushijima cut off.
“um... i— i'm…” you can't find the words to say, but sachiko quickly noticed it and knew exactly what was happening to you.
she stepped in between you two, facing ushijima.
“wakatoshi, you're pressuring (y/n).” she scolded.
“pressuring? what do you mean?” he replied, ever so clueless. she sighed heavily.
“you're not the type to do something like what you did earlier, who was the one who taught you that?”
“tendou.” he replied quickly.
‘that idiot…’ she thought.
“listen wakatoshi, it hasn't been long since you two have rekindled your relationship with (y/n). this is just the third time that you two met since that happened, but here you are already asking her to be together with you, and doing it in a romantic, i guess, for (y/n), but also aggressive way.” she explained.
“what do you mean, ‘romantic for me’?!” you whined, but yumi calmed you down.
“so, (y/n). what are you gonna do?” she asked you which made you jump a little.
“i don't know…”
‘does that mean she's rejecting me?’ ushijima thought as he looked at you.
“but, i'm willing to try. it’s just too fast…” you continued with a hint of blush on your cheeks. ‘of course, it’s wakatoshi.’
“is that a yes?” ushijima asked, seemingly not able to understand what you just said. sachiko sighed heavily again.
“yes, wakatoshi. it is.” she answered boringly.
“but, how about we take everything slowly?” you said.
“if that's what you want, (y/n).” he replied with a smile on his face.
“now! let's continue our girls' day featuring wakatoshi!” sachiko shouted.
“yeah!” yumi said and they both ran in front.
you were about to follow them when ushijima reached for your wrist again. you looked at him, looking like a tomato, wondering if he'll do something like what he did earlier once more.
“since sachiko and yumi joined us now, i presume that we can't count this as our first date, right?” you just nodded at him. “then, let me take you somewhere nice next time, only the two of us, okay?”
“o-okay…”
“thank you for accepting my affection for you, (y/n). i'll try my best from now on.”
“oi! love birds! hurry!” sachiko shouted at the two of you, ruining the moment.
…
semi was enjoying his day-off, when he decided to go to instagram and check some of his friend's stories, and suddenly how he wished he never did.
when he turned to sachiko's close friend's story, he saw the caption saying: “congrats to these new lovebirds. i hope you two don't die. jk. love you<3” with the pic of you and ushijima sitting next to each other, as you smiled at him lovingly.
‘ah, i knew it'd happen sooner or later, so they got together. haha.’
he tossed his phone on his bed and threw his head back.
‘why are you crying?’ trying to hold back his tears.
‘damn it. it hurts.’
to be continued…
if you're interested for the next one, the whole story is already available on my patreon.
if you'd like to support me, you can also check here!
❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
i hope you enjoyed it!
he suddenly cut you off, but i'm not sure if you heard it right. sachiko gave you a confused look, wondering what riku just said.
“huh? sorry, what?”
“us. viral. today's performance. trending. youtube. twitter. higo. very happy.”
“since when did your leader became a robot, not that i can hear what he said—”
she didn't even get to finish what she was about to say when you suddenly screamed, which startled her.
“what is wrong with you?!”
“our performance today at the fan sign event of wakatoshi went viral!” you explained to her. her eyes slowly widened.
she suddenly stood up and walked to your balcony looking straight. she moved the curtain sideways and dramatically opened the door.
once she reached the balcony, she stared at the sky for a second and then she suddenly shouted.
“(f/n) (l/n) is my best friend! her band is viral right now, go and share it—”
before the landlord and the neighborhood even complained, you pulled her inside and closed the curtains and glass door.
‘gosh, did i just see the tenant from the other building looking at me?! ohmyghad!’
“what are you doing, idiot?! some people are sleeping already!”
“ah. you're right.”
she even tried to go back to the balcony and shout 'sorry' again, but you stopped her before complaints rain down on your mailbox tomorrow.
you looked at your phone and saw that riku had hung up already. your eyes quickly noticed that your group chat got a new message from higo.
“is everyone still awake? can you come here to the building right now? it's alright if you can't. the upper brass want to talk to you guys.” that is what he said.
you immediately replied yes, and that you'll be there, but semi said he'll pick you up since it's dangerous outside this time. you also asked them if you can bring sachiko along, since she'll be left alone if you leave, and higo said it's no problem.
after five minutes, semi arrived, fast. too fast. he opened the door for you two.
“wow eita, that's too fast.” sachiko said and poke on his side, teasing him. semi just shrugged it off, laughing.
“i don’t know what you’re talking about.” he replied, shrugging while chuckling.
he drove to the company building which is still up despite the time.
you quickly went to your room and there was higo, riku and yumi already. sachiko quickly ran to yumi and they squealed as they hugged each other.
“mori's not here yet?” semi asked.
“yeah, apparently the jerk’s already sleeping when i tried to call him,” riku answered.
“well, that's the usual mori that we know. so what do they want to talk about?” you questioned as you took a seat next to sachiko and yumi.
“well, about that... it seems like they'll just go here after some sort of meeting they're having right now finishes.” higo explained. “but, i'm pretty sure that what they'll talk about is how we should take advantage of something that was viral right now and what we should do and what we shouldn't. that's pretty much it, but i don't know if they'll add something else.” he added.
“can’t it wait until tomorrow?” sachiko asked.
“we don’t have a choice. it’s the first time, since this building and company was founded, that the artist went viral, like this much. they don’t want to let this chance go.”
…
*ring* *ring* *ring*
you reached for your alarm clock and turned it off as you let out a yawn. you stretched your body and spaced out for a bit, before deciding to get up and wash your face.
when you were done, you went out of your room and saw that it's still quiet.
‘so, sachiko is still sleeping.’
you walked to her room, opened the door and saw her weird sleeping position and snoring. you were about to wake her up, but suddenly her phone rang in a loud volume.
before it even finished, she turned it off and then let out a shriek when she saw you looking at her, then called you a pervert for what she said while watching her while she sleeps.
you just shook your head and went to the kitchen. you grabbed the pan and placed it on the stove.
‘wait... that song, johny johny... if i'm right, that's the same song satori had changed sachiko's ringtone back in high school.’
‘i remembered how that stupid redhead changed mine to "baby shark" too.’
‘i even ranted it on wakatoshi and then remembered how wakatoshi loves to listen to "humpy dumpy".’
‘haha. how nostalgic.’
‘ah. wait.’
‘that time wakatoshi said something before we went to class. what was it again?’
‘ah! i think it was…’
‘“you remember that i like humpy dumpy, but not me?” was it?’
‘hm? what does he mean by that? what does he mean by not remembering him? of course, i remember him. ushijima wakatoshi. what is he saying?’
“oi, miss. the pan is getting burned.”
you jumped when sachiko suddenly appeared behind you, but noticed that she was right and quickly turned off the stove.
“what are you doing? getting all spaced out this early in the morning?” she asked as she took a seat.
“no, i just remembered something. anyways, i'm glad you took a leave for today.”
“of course, i will! i'm spending time with you and yumi-chan!” she said enthusiastically. “you should be grateful, lowly human being. i'm taking my precious leave for you! hohoho~”
“yeah, yeah.”
‘she sounds like santa claus.’
after you ate and got dressed. you went out of your place and called a taxi to take you to the meeting place with yumi.
when you got there, yumi waved at you both from the outside table of the nearby cafe.
“good morning. well, you know we can’t really all lovey-dovey in public. good morning, (y/n).” yumi said.
“good morning,” you said as you took a seat. “how did mori react when he learnt that we're going viral?” you asked yumi.
“well, we actually woke up because of him.” she answered as she shook her head. “he called riku first thing in the morning and was shouting at him.”
“riku! why didn't you wake me up?!”
“you guys had a meeting yesterday, and yet no one even thought to go to me?!”
“what kind of friends are you?!”
“in the first place, the last time i tried to wake him up, he almost killed me,” she added.
‘that sounds like such a mori thing to do…’
after you talked for a bit, you finally decided to head out.
“it's a good thing that the management let you two go here today, even if your band is the main topic on the internet today.” sachiko said as you bought your tickets.
“yeah, they said that it's okay for now,” you answered as you handed the person in charge your ticket.
“now, now. let's stop talking about work for now and enjoy this day!” yumi shouted and put her hands up in the sky. you smiled at her.
“you're right. let's enjoy this rare chance of us going out together.” you said.
“yeah! it's girls' day!” sachiko said next.
you ran to the first attraction that wasn't that extreme first so that you can build up the excitement.
of course, sachiko said it was lame, and when the staff heard it. she explained that it was intended for children in the first place. you left the ride with your face as red as a tomato.
the excitement that you three felt was getting bigger as time flew by and riding even more extreme attractions only made you look forward to the more dangerous rides.
but...
*growl*
yumi and sachiko both look at you and then to your tummy and let out a laugh.
“gosh, stop laughing, you two! let's just go get something to eat!” you said as you stomped your way to the food court.
you took a seat at the table and then looked around to see what you should eat for now.
“we should take a light snack so that our stomach won't feel it when we go to the next rides.” yumi reminded you.
one stall caught your eyes and it's the onigiri miya.
“i'm gonna go grab onigiri, you want that too?” you asked. they shook their heads as they also had something else they wanted to eat.
you walked to the stall and fell in line.
when it was your turn, you placed out your order, but suddenly stopped mid-sentence.
‘so handsome…’
“sorry, ma'am. but you need to tell me your whole order, or i won't be able to serve you.” the grey-haired guy in front of you said smiling, because of how long you stared at him, and his voice brought you back to reality.
“oh, s-sorry. two orders of the tuna flavour, small, please.”
“yes, please wait for a bit.” he said and after a while, he handed you your order and you handed him your pay and got yourself out of the embarrassing moment.
“okay! let's continue!” sachiko said in excitement.
you walked to the next ride that sachiko wanted to ride, ever since you entered the theme park.
but something unexpected happened.
“um... excuse me, are you the vocalist of the hayashi band?”
‘huh?’
a girl, probably a teenager, walked up to you and asked you. you looked up to yumi and sachiko and they were as surprised as you.
“umm... i—”
“ah! she's right! it's the girl from the video that i watched on youtube!”
“yeah! i saw it on twitter too! they're so cool!”
“oh! the pianist girl is here, too!”
‘gah. the people are gathering, what do i do?’
‘argh! they're pushing me! sachiko, yumi— ah! wait! they're too far, the crowd separated me from them two!’
“wait— my friends—”
a guy from the back of the crowd suddenly extended his arms out, your defence mechanism suddenly made you take a step back, not noticing that there's a rock where your foot was about to land.
‘i have lived a good life.’ you let your body fall, while your eyes are closed shut, waiting for you to hit the ground that didn't happen.
when you opened your eyes, you were dragged not too forcefully and not too light. you looked back to the crowd and they were searching for you and yumi.
‘where did they go?’
‘where is sachiko?’
‘wait. who is this guy? why is he dragging me?’
you glanced in front of you and your eyes widened in surprise.
“wakatoshi?!”
‘again?!’
to be continued…
if you're interested for the next one, the whole story is already available on my patreon.
if you'd like to support me, you can also check here!
❤︎ ྀི˖ ko-fi.
i hope you enjoyed it!
