Β Β Β Β Β β i wishΒ that i could be better to you, β she admitted, sadness clear in her voice. β i wish i could let go of the past, and focus on our future. i am trying ; i will keep trying, until one day it is the truth. β she could not undo what had been done, but that did not mean she was not trying to forget, to put it behind her, where it belonged. whether it were possible she did not know, but she would not give up so easily. yet myrcella shook her head. he might mean everything he said ; his brother had, when heβd said it, but that had not changed their fate. β you are not the first to tell me that, β she said, hating that she could not simply accept his promise. she wanted it to be true ; it was dangerous, the hope that kindled in her chest at his words. the picture of their life he painted was one sheβd dreamed of, ruling casterly rock beside a good man, raising beautiful golden-haired little lions. sheβd feared he would not want that, a marriage and a family with her ; to know he felt otherwise was a small relief. he was not the one sheβd pictured beside her, but she wanted that life all the same. arryk was gone, their love broken apart, with no chance of it ever being rebuilt. was it wrong, for her to try and find what pieces of her happiness she could with his brother? to take what was left of her dreams and try to make them reality, to live the life sheβd been promised as best as she could? it seemed the only thing she could do. mourning a love that was gone forever would only prolong her suffering. she had to find a way to move on.Β β it does not matter, what i imagined,Β β she told him, hoping he could hear the sincerity in her words.Β β you are the one who willΒ be there, and that is what matters, in the end.Β β yet she knew better than to hope too hard. it would be too easy, for this fragile picture of their life to fall apart.Β
βam i to believe you are not good to me already? you have been nothing but good to me myrcella. i will not be able to take myΒ place at the rock without you by my side, my household would fall apart without you. you are immensely good to me, you could have broken off the betrothal but you stayed and for that, i cannot express the depth of my gratitude.β he could see how broken she was, how she sat there unable to accept his promises because of ones that had gone unfulfilled in the past.Β βi will be there. iβllΒ be there for you, for our children. you donβt have to believe it now, iβll prove it later.β lucan stood, extending his hand for her to take, he couldnβt stand to be cooped up in his room for any longer, and it would do them well for the court to see them together.Β βhow about a turn around the garden and then some food? if thereβs time before supper we should go and see mama too.β