April is full of pasts and rotten poetry.
Strangers with thumbtack faces walking cobbled streets,
Awake before the wind.
Porridge. Nicotine. Tangerines.
The taste of stolen innocence.
What do you pray for when no one is listening?
Axelle Dean King is an aspiring writer, whose writing explores love, sexuality and trauma.
Gone are First Friday
openings in Old City
I settle for a bagel
and cream cheese
topped with thin slices
of vine-ripened tomato and avocado
I may have lost the sense
I never had much of
Last night I dreamt of you
next of me
as we’ve never been
I’d give up my best vices
for a lifetime of your warmth
All the books dust themselves off
& take new places on the shelf
I hope tonight I dream of you…
QUOTES: "1900 Bever Street" by A. R. Williams (from the Eunoia Review) | a poem from @psychastria on Instagram
I was browsing through one of my favourite literary journals earlier and found a few poems that really reminded me of a few Maneskin songs, so I thought I'd share them with you!
In Need of Some Extra Love || A Thomas Raggi Blurb
Pairings: Thomas Raggi x Reader
Hurt/comfort, angst, fluff
Words: 2k
Trigger warnings: eating disorder, food, body image, mental health
Warnings: This is very triggering as the reader is someone who struggles with an eating disorder and if this topic triggers you, please pass this fic. Please be kind to yourselves. 💖
A/N: This was a request. To the anon who requested it, I hope you're okay <3 Recovery is a journey and it's so so worth it.
Description: Thomas comes home after being away for some time and notices worrying signs about your mental health. He does his best to give you all the extra love you need and to find a way to help you recover.
M A S T E R L I S T
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He came home from the tour excited to spend all the time he can with you. Both of you had been on intense schedules chasing your dreams but it was time for some extra love.
Thomas stepped inside the apartment that the two of you shared, carrying a big bouquet of your favorite flowers and his suitcases in tow.
“My love?” He asked, stepping out of the shoes. The apartment looked absolutely immaculate but he couldn’t find you anywhere.
He reached for his phone, having decided to text instead of call.
“When will you be getting home, amore mio?” He asked, putting the flowers in some water.
“Probably in an hour or so.” You shot back almost immediately.
“I look forward to holding you in my arms.” He replied,a smile coming to his face the second he imagined holding you.
“I look forward to being held in your arms.x”
He pulled his suitcases to the living room area and started sorting through his luggage. You had put a lot of effort in maintaining the apartment and he was not about to waste your efforts with his chaos.
He quickly sorted the clean and laundry piles, loaded the first load of laundry in the washing machine and hopped in the shower, wanting to wash away the tiredness and to be as fresh and handsome as he could be for you.
After getting out of the shower, he put on a bit of perfume, just for that extra small detail because he knew how much you loved his perfume, and he put on soft comfy clothes and started messing around with one of his guitars.
He jumped up when he heard the door being unlocked, put away the guitar and ran (almost tripping over) to get the flowers, which he dried off and stepped towards the front door.
“Hello!” Your heart melted at the biggest cutest smile that you had ever seen him smile.
“You’re home!” You dropped the bag that you were holding and threw yourself in his arms, desperate to feel his heart beat against yours.
“I missed you.” Thomas said quietly in your ear. “I missed you so much, dolcezza.”
“I missed you too, Thommy.” You pressed a kiss to his cheek.
The two of you pulled apart for a moment and you shrugged off your jacket and took off your shoes, put away the bag that you had been carrying and put the flowers in the vase.
“When did you come in? Are you tired? How was your day?” You bombarded him with questions.
“I came in about an hour ago, I put away my things and I am okay. My day just got a lot better.” He gave another adorable smile.
“My day got a lot better too.” You stepped towards him until you finally sat down on his lap. “It feels so good that you’re here.” You kissed him gently. “It felt like you were missing from me.” Admitting that made you feel vulnerable and redness rose to your cheeks.
“I am here, my love and we could figure out a way to travel together next time too.” He promised, pulling you in for another kiss.
**
The rest of the evening was spent in soft kisses, playful bites and yearning touches.
You got up at one point to light some candles, the light in the living room being too harsh for your eyes.
“We should get something for dinner to celebrate.” Thomas suggested, his stomach reminding him of its presence.
“That would be nice actually, I am not in the mood to cook.” You agreed and the two of you went through the menu of your favorite restaurant, picking out a few things to get.
“I’ll get the wine.” Thom got up from the sofa while you were setting the table and lighting candles.
You put on some soft music in the background and sat down as Thom opened the wine.
He looked so soft in the dim light that the temptation to have something to remember this evening overwhelmed you and you started taking pictures of him.
He played along, posing and making cute faces but also acting natural like he would only in front of his closest people.
The bliss got interrupted when the food arrived.
You started unpacking the food and settling it down on the table when he snuck behind you and pressed a kiss to your neck, pressing his body to yours.
“We can take pictures together too, you know.” He said softly.
“I have all the pictures that I need.” You smiled all smug.
“I want pictures of you too, Y/N.” He made the cutest face after turning you to face him.
“That cute face won’t work on me.” You got on tiptoes to press a kiss to his lips before sitting down.
“Do you want to sit in my lap?” He wiggled his eyebrows which made you chuckle.
“Not tonight, meow meow man.”
“Pity, my love. My lap missed you so much.”
His flirting attempts made you laugh and he took that as a personal win since you had gotten a bit more quiet in the past hour or so.
You ate some of the food but not all of it and put away the rest as leftovers for the next day.
**
He woke up when he felt that you weren’t in bed. Still groggy from sleep, he became aware of the water running in the bathroom.
“Buongiorno!” He yawned, ready to step in and join you in the shower.
“Morning, amore.” You almost yelped. Waking up to him was lovely but you had gotten used to being alone in the mornings. Alone, and not very kind to yourself.
He stepped in the warmed up bathroom and started stripping, ready for a naughtier continuation of your activities from the dessert portion of the evening when you shut off the shower.
“No couple’s showering? I needed help with my hair!” He complained playfully.
You wrapped yourself quickly with the towels, uncomfortable with the idea of him seeing you this exposed in broad light.
“No, amore. I am in a rush, I have a meeting to get to but I’ll be back soon.” You pressed a kiss to his still sleepy face and rushed past him and to the closet, your heart racing to get yourself covered. Thomas had seen you naked plenty of times but lately, you had felt not so good in your skin and didn’t want to expose him to your less than kind self moments.
He didn’t get in the shower but instead went into the kitchen to make you some breakfast - avocado toast, just how you liked it and sliced tomatoes on the side. He also made a cup of coffee for you and got the to-go mug ready so you wouldn’t worry about leaving your coffee behind.
You almost rushed by the kitchen, completely ignoring the growls of your stomach.
“Amore!” He said, confused at the way you were acting.
“What?” You stood in front of the mirror and started fixing your clothes before starting on your makeup.
“I made you breakfast so you wouldn’t go on an empty stomach.” He smiled, proud of himself.
“That’s lovely, babe but I don’t have time for this.” You argued, wanting to avoid the whole food conversation. You would eat, at some point. Maybe later.
“We’ve had this conversation before, amore.” He insisted. “You are early enough, knowing you, so you have time.”
“Thom… I am not hungry.” You insisted, reaching for the coffee cup. He snagged it out of your reach.
“You need to put something in your stomach before you give yourself an ulcer.”
“You’re one to talk.” You snapped at him, catching him off guard. You two never really fought which only made you feel worse.
“I’ll see you later.” You told him, grabbing your bag and getting out the door before he could stop you.
**
You got to your car and started sobbing. Fuck the makeup, fuck the meeting. You didn’t expect Thom to be awake at this hour, wanting to see you off to work so early when his break had just begun.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” You yelled and wiped your face, the remnants of makeup smudged everywhere.
It took a while to get down from the meltdown.
You felt awful for the way Thomas looked at you. You hurt him, you selfless prick. You cussed at yourself. He doesn’t deserve any of this bullshit.
You parked a short walk away from the meeting spot, made yourself look presentable and then bullshitted your way through the presentation.
Truthfully, you didn’t care about the meeting, about what anyone had to say because the mean voice in your head was overpowering all of them.
You drove home, a part of you hoping that he wouldn’t be there so you could avoid the awkward conversations for a little bit.
Your heart sank when you found him sitting at the kitchen table.
“Y/N!” He exclaimed, his voice full of relief, his eyes glistening with tears.
“Thom..”
“Y/N, I was so worried about you.” He cupped your face and pressed a kiss to your forehead after making sure that you’re alright. He pulled you into a tight hug which just made you start sobbing all over again.
“Thomas… hey, I don’t deserve this.” You hiccuped. “Not after being so mean to you when you made me breakfast and bothered with me on your day off.”
“Bothered with you? You are not a bother, amore. You are my partner and I want to be there for you just as you are here for me.” He pulled you towards the sofa. You wanted to run and hide, to not talk or do anything that might expose you even further.
“I noticed some things…” He started cautiously.
“Thom, we don’t need to talk about this.” You tried to stop the whole thing.
“I am worried about you.”
“Look, stress has been too much lately with everything happening at work and I just… my stomach gets nervous and I want to avoid feeling nauseous.”
“Skipping meals is not good, amore.”
“Thom..”
“Can I please help? Can you let me help you?” He pleaded.
“Thom.. You can’t fight this for me.”
“I don’t want to fight this for you, I want to fight it with you. Alongside you.” He kissed your hands. “This is not easy, I can only imagine how difficult it must be for you. But we will find a way to get you back on track. We will seek help and we will do it as a team - team Y/L/N and Raggi for the win!”
You giggled through tears at his enthusiasm. Gods, you loved him so much.
“Thom, you don’t have to..”
“I know, i know. But you are my partner and I love you, and we are together in the good and the not so good.” He kissed you gently and wiped your tears. “We will figure it out, amore and we won’t let that brain bully you into believing things that are not true.”
**
He stayed true to his word. It was small steps at first. The two of you cooking together, eating together. Him giving you all the patience and space that you needed and catering to your every need. The two of you found a therapist that you started meeting regularly and while the journey of recovery was not a particularly easy one, you knew that despite the struggles, recovery was possible and worth it.
Okay, break from my own shit - I can't see it. Will this be a stupid idea to read right now, maybe. Who knows.
Love that the title is mentioned is in the first paragraph already <3
I need Thomas to bring me pretty flowers, please 🥺
"“I look forward to holding you in my arms.”" -> Pleeeeeease!
Not Thomas almost tripping over, ... why is this so cute?
"and threw yourself in his arms, desperate to feel his heart beat against yours." -> I'm hormonal, I can't take it. I want to cry because it's so cute. And Thomas is such a fucking cute fool
"The rest of the evening was spent in soft kisses, playful bites and yearning touches." -> 😭😭😭🥺🥺🥺 (God, I need to bite Thomas playfully)
"He looked so soft in the dim light that the temptation to have something to remember this evening overwhelmed you and you started taking pictures of him." -> I am repeating myself but this is the fucking fluffiest <3
"meow meow man" -> Please, that's soooo funny. Also Thomas flirting, I love THAT. And he would absolutely be like that, he would say stuff like that
Oh no, oh no, oh no. Not Thomas wanting some morning fun, I'm pretty sure he won't get it like that
Oh god, I feel that :/ And it doesn't matter how many times someone has seen you naked, when you're feeling that way you'll just run
Oh honey, Thomas so confused about that behaviour breaks my heart a little bit
"You would eat, at some point. Maybe later." -> Ouch
Nonononono, no fighting, please. I can't take it either
Not Thomas crying 😿
"I don’t want to fight this for you, I want to fight it with you." -> Oh, please 😭
"we won’t let that brain bully you into believing things that are not true." -> Wait, let me put that onto a post it note for myself, lol
warning(s): one mention of blood in person's veins
word count: 631
summary: when you and damiano find a field of dandelions, your vacation in french countryside can’t get any better.
a/n: over a year ago, a certain person made a playlist for me, this song was in it. i still find it very beautiful and it inspired me to write a short fic. as you may see, i’m trying to improve my writing. i also want to thank @bidet-and-legolas for proofreading 🤍
dandelions.
there were hundreds of thousands of them. sitting on the ground, surrounded by them, you felt like a plant from a different ecosystem which has been gradually putting down its roots.
a light breeze seemed to be moving feather-like clouds high above the planet. the temperature was the optimum in which you felt most at peace with reality: high, but not a suffocating heat.
while slowly approaching you, damiano took all of his steps like a spy. in his eyes, you were a masterpiece and he was admiring you.
your hair was falling down in cascades over a flaxen dress the color of freshly harvested peaches. you were holding one of the flowers in your hand with great caution, like it was the last one in the world and you could save the species from going extinct.
“what are you thinking about, bella?” your boyfriend asked, and sat down on the grass. he began tracing the tattoo on your arm with his fingers, just like he did a week after you got it and finally took the protective film off it. damiano loved every inch of your skin and always let you know about it.
“i’m wishing on those little things”
this was true. when you encountered this field about ten minutes ago, during your bike excursion in the countryside, it instantly reminded you of an old superstition.
“and what are you wishing for?” damiano enquired, resting his head on your shoulder and intertwining his fingers with yours.
“don’t you know saying it out loud is against the rules of wishing?” you replied half-jokingly.
“come on, won’t you tell me?” damiano tried to convince you, looking at you with puppy eyes.
“alright” you blew the seeds of the dandelion and watched them make their way through the lukewarm air. you looked into his hazel eyes and cupped his cheeks delicately.
“i wished that you’ll be mine forever”
then you closed your eyes and pulled him even closer. that’s when your lips met his in a soft kiss that was becoming more and more passionate every second.
when it came to an end, damiano’s eyes light up like sparklers.
“your wish is going to come true, i promise” he beamed and looked at you fondly.
“but i need you to close your eyes right now” damiano added.
“um.. okay?” you didn’t have the slightest idea what he was plotting this time but you followed his instructions.
he must’ve gotten up from the ground because your shoulders brushed and the space next to you seemed empty.
you could feel the blood in your veins flowing faster and faster.
“dami, where are you going?” you couldn’t help but ask.
“please be patient” his voice could be heard a few meters away from your sitting spot. although you were hyped up, you kept sitting still, seeing nothing but darkness in front of you.
“well, you can open your eyes now”
you finally lifted your eyelids to a sight of damiano kneeling before you. he was holding a little blue box with a shiny ring in it. the loving look on his face already expressed what he was about to say.
“i finally gathered the courage to do this. will you marry me, y/n?”
the last five words were the confirmation that your boyfriend and you shared the same wish. you were convinced that no one could tear two of you apart, ever.
your eyes glazed over as you reached for his hand.
“yes” you exclaimed. the next thing you knew, you had a diamond ring on your finger. damiano pulled you in and your lips started moving in perfect sync. in that moment, it was like you were the only people on earth.
Hello, sweets!
Today's post is going to be a little bit late! I really hope you enjoy it! In the meantime here are some photos about the last few days! The second one is the breakfast Billy made me this morning!
Yours sincerely, Liz ✿
Mysterious Cosmic ‘Keyhole’: a reflection nebula in the constellation Orion is a relic of recent star formation – it is composed of debris left over from the formation of a newborn star and it's around 1,350 light-years from Earth.
{image credit: Nasa}
andulkaphoto
romaincrisis
origamiaround
2087
gamechangershow
ellievsbear
yousharknotpass
