My Life in Scribbles

[lyssavillanueva]

Sala sa init, sala sa lamig. Sa gabi, mag-isang tiniis ang panginginig, Dulot ng puso mong hindi marunong makinig. Hinayaang sa araw naman ay malusaw, Ang pusong matagal na matagal ng uhaw. Sala sa init, sala sa lamig. Dito matatapos ang ating pagniniig. (at Calle Crisologo Vigan, Ilocos Sur)

[lyssavillanueva]

Dito tayo sa gitna, Sa gitna kung saan walang labis, walang kulang. Sa gitna kung saan lahat ay pantay at lahat ay pare pareho ang kulay. Dito tayo sa gitna, dahil dito alam mong kung sino ka ay sapat na. (at Patapat Viaduct)

[lyssavillanueva]

So, last Friday, November 24, our company had a open mic night entitled #POETmalu, wherein employees will be given a chance to perform. You can either sing or deliver the poetry pieces your wrote. 

As for me, I was tapped (literally) by the organizer if I wanted to perform a piece. I told him I never had an experience with open mic performances and the last time I performed a poem in front of many people was in elementary. LOL. To make things worse, I cannot even remember the last time I have written a decent poem. So, I was not mentally and physically (introverted me strikes back) prepared to perform.  So ano pang point ng post na ito kung di rin naman ako nagperform diba? LOL. Pero surprise, I did! hahaha! 

Up until the day before the event, the organizer asked me again if I want to perform and I said, okay. HAHA. papilit pa si ate gurl, pero deep inside, gusto rin naman niya. LOL.  The organizer told me that it doesn’t have to be impromptu, as long as you are willing to take the stage and showcase your piece, you will be good to go. 

So eto na nga, to cut the long story short, I performed and here’s the piece I wrote. Wag na yung video ng performance kasi ang chaka. hahaha. 

“Pagod na ako,”

 Ilang beses ko na nga bang sinabi ito?

Isa? Dalawa? Tatlo? O Sampu?

Ewan ko, hindi ko na nabilang; hindi ko na alam.  

At sa totoo lang, malapit na akong mawalan ng paki-alam.

Dahil pagod na ako

At ilang beses ko nang tinangkang sabihin ito sayo?

Pero sa tuwing bubuka ang bibig, nauunahan ng takot—

Na baka dyan sa mga mata mo, sa mga mata mong hindi ko magawang titigan, ay makita ko ang lungkot. 

Pagod na ako

Pero hindi ibig sabihin non, nakalimutan ko na ang lahat

Ang masasayang sandali na bilad sa araw ang balat,

At ang gabi gabing sabay nating pagbabasa ng aklat.

Hindi ko nakakalimutan,

Hindi ko kakalilimutan. 

Pagod na ako

Pero wag mo sanang isipin na kasalanan mo ito.

Ako, ako ang walang nagawa

Nang mapagtantong hindi ikaw ang nagpapasaya.

Hindi na rin kayang pagtakpan ng mga salita mo at kanta,

Ang puso na parang bulaklak na unti-unting nalalanta.

Hindi magawang makumbinsi ang kahungkangan,

Kahit ilang beses kong sinubukang ibalik ang dating nararamdaman.

At hindi na rin kayang ikubli ng araw araw na pagkukunwari,

Ang pagod na hindi mawari kung saan nanggaling. 

Kahit anong pilit kong gawin, hindi na awit ang naririnig sa mga dingding.

Sa halip, pagtulo ng luha ang maririnig sa hating gabi

at sa umaga ay nakabibinging katahimikan ang mayroon sa halip na mga halinghing.

Malayo na ang tinakbo, at akala ko, kaya kong umabot sa dulo.

Akala ko lang pala iyon.

Kaya patawad kung mauuna akong hihinto,

Maiiwan na sa kinatatayuan, papanuorin ang iyong paglayo.

Dahil pagod na ako.

Hindi na ikaw ang nakikitang kasama sa magpakailanman.

Kaya tama na, tigilan na natin itong takbuhan.

Dahil pagod na ako.

Pagod na pagod na ako.

[lyssavillanueva]

Lai x Travels: Creatives RnR 2017 Part 2

SECOND DAY

Hooray for Day 2 of our RnR! We left La Union at around 10 AM and travelled all the way up to Baguio. I remember the road was so foggy back then that it was almost zero visibility. But we made it to Ben Cab at around noon. 

Most of our second day was spent at the museum, hence, the photos I’ll be posting will feat the some pieces from the place. We also toured Baguio for an hour or so, but since my camera already died at that time, I was only able to capture some photos via phone.

    Ate Beck’s portrait. HAHAHAHA 

I still have a lot of photos of pieces that has caught my attention, pero feel ko sobrang photo loaded na itong post na ito and there’s still some i found from other accounts... This is us while waiting for our food.  We had our lunch-yenda  (lunch and merienda) at the museum’s Café Isabel.

Tapos may pa-photo shoot pa kaming keme sa garden ng Ben Cab. 

Sooooo, yuuuuun. This end my entry for my RnR with Creatives. This is probably the first and the last I’ll have this them that’s why I wanted to post it here--to serve as a reminder of the fun times we had together out of the four corners of our (then) office. 

PS: Can I allow myself to do a little drama as I end this post? I just want to tell these humans, (if ever you come upon this post, or if you ever happen to read this by accident) that I love you all sincerely and dearly. Our times together are remembered and will forever be treasured.

           Though we have started parting ways now or things are not the same as it was before, I hope you all the best things in life. We might not be in the same place as we were now or then, I know the bond we have shared will never be broken--it’s a hard piece of wood to be broken. We’ll see each other again.

           Until next time!

[lyssavillanueva]

Paoay Church, Ilocos Norte

2017

[lyssavillanueva]

Lai x Travels: Creatives RnR 2017

Months ago, our department had a RnR trip (Rest and Relaxation) that was sponsored by our company. We were not complete during the trip though, but it was something to remember—something I want to be reminded of (even if the preparation process was such a hassle to the intense levels).

I know this is already too late to be posted just now, but for sake the of having all the memories stored and remembered, here’s a post dedicated to my first out of town trip with my company friends.

The planning of this trip was complicated, but we ended up having two certain destinations: Urbiztondo, La Union and Ben Cab Museum in Baguio.

FIRST DAY:

We left Manila at 2AM and arrived at La Union around 6 AM or 7AM. And since the hostel we are about to stay in doesn’t allow check ins before 12 nn, we opted to have breakfast at the famous hippie coffee shop—El Union Coffee.

The place speaks of Hippie/ indie feels and according to an officemate, a group of surfer friends were brains behind the place (googling now for verification…and yep, partly true. But generally, the coffee shop is manned and run by a couple named Kiddo and Amy Cosios* http://www.esquiremag.ph/culture/lifestyle/how-this-surfing-couple-is-bringing-up-their-kids-by-the-sea-without-school-a1520-20170721-lfrm3*). 

The place was still closed when we arrived there, in fact, there was a group of four people who are doing their morning exercise routines as guests are starting to pile up outside the place. When it was almost 9AM, the group proceeded inside…behind the counter to prep our orders!

After breakfast we went and checked in in our hostel to drop off our bags. Luckily, the landlady warmed up to us (not so fast though, but at the end of our stay, I was really telling her that I want to be back.). We stayed at Yang’s House. With 12 of us in the group, we were given the barkada room (12,000 PHP / Night)  that is comprised of 6 double decked rooms…which I do not have a photo of. Sorry. :P

The hostel landlady gave us coffee and bread (with peanut butter / jam) for breakfast and allowed us to stay and prep our meals at her kitchen as well. But she was strict at the implementation of 10PM lights off for the guests.

The beach is a 5 minute walk away from our hostel. Which I think is a really unfortunate situation (all the hostels near around or near the beach were all fully booked) since we do not have any cottage to keep our things safe and to rest as well. Hence, we had to rent a cottage (1,200 php rental fee) for the rest of the afternoon. I don’t remember the name of the place, but it is resto / bar on the end of the beach (near the shops and the Urbiztondo land mark).  This is where we ordered our scrumptious lunch. :D

Now, the beach…I’ve been to a number of beaches in my entire 22 years of my life but nothing can ever be compared to the strength of the waves of La Union that pushed and pulled me in, literally. The waves were so strong that seemed to be proving why La Union is the Surfing Capital of the country. 

To be honest, I really want to go back and let the waves hit me again. Mapapadala nalang ako sa alon kaysa mamubrelema sa buhay, bes. Haha next time, I’ll try to have surfing lessons. :D

And our Day 1, ends here! Will post the Ben Cab and Baguio part in a separate post! :D 

[lyssavillanueva]

Goodbyes are messy business.

It comes when you least expect it, catching you off guard—like a bird poo falling on your shoulder while you’re walking on a sunny day in a park. It ruins not only your shirt or your day. It ruins a part of you, incapacitating your wholeness.  

It also comes in an uneventful day, when you are unprepared. Like an uninvited guest, barging in, and, taking a piece of you that you never intended to giveaway.  

There are, however, anticipated goodbyes. These are ones that had put up all the warning signs, to give you a heads up, in high hopes that it will lessen the hurt and the pain.

Anticipated goodbyes’ keeps on you tenterhooks, walking you on the edge not knowing when or where it would exactly arrive. And when it does, it still hurts the same.

Goodbyes leaves obvious traces, like foot prints on a newly cemented a pavement—a forever mark.  A mark that you will feel burning in the middle of your chest at night, like a fire hole demanding to burn all of you until there is nothing left but ashes.

Goodbyes doesn’t make you forget.  It makes you remember every single detail, making you relive the moments whether you like it or not. Like a movie replaying over and over again right before your eyes.

Goodbyes make you question yourself too. It happens during your waking hours, and even rob you of sleep at night.  And then, you ask if you deserve it or not; have you done your best or did you overdid everything; or maybe you are not just enough. You ask questions that never seemed to end, but you get nothing in return. There are no right answers to hamper the hurt and make it go away easily.  

Goodbyes are messy business. In the end it leaves you with a tear streaked face, wounded heart and a head full of shattered memories.

Goodbyes are the kind of business you don’t sign you up for, but you’ll go through it anyway—whether you like it or not. It comes not with shaking of hands, or written documents with clauses you can fully understand.

You have no choice. It is as inevitable as change or life or death.

And one way or another it’s the end point of it all.

[lyssavillanueva]

Pinto Art Museum, June 2017

[lyssavillanueva]

Ready, stop and go.

Why can't humans have their own traffic lights?

Why can't humans have their own traffic lights to dictate them of what to do and what to feel? Most especially to the emotions they can't control. These are the kind of emotions that you do not want to feel but end up feeling anyway because you can't tell yourself of when or how you should stop or go.

Why can't humans have their own traffic lights to avoid unnecessary events they do not want to happen? Like falling unexpectedly and hurting someone, or worse, hurting yourself deeply?

Traffic lights can warn you to be ready before telling you to go and take a road, which humans lack most of the time. How ironic it is to be caught off guard of your own emotions that when it suddenly hits you, you have no other choice but to acknowledge it even if you don't want it, even if you know it would hurt you in the end.

We all have the choice to stop or go, but emotions? They refused to be controlled.

They go opposite of what you want it so before you even know it, you get lost. You get redirected to a place you didn't plan to go. It can be a familiar place you didn't want to go back to or somewhere unknown that makes every single fiber in you scared.

However, if you are lucky, you can find the right road with the right signs. But if you are like me, who found herself in a place I'd never thought i'd be in, it's hard to get out not only because you get lost in the feeling, but because you know it would end up in a dead end.

There is no other way to go simply because you are already in. Going back meant hurting yourself while going forward hurts the both of you. So if you turn in the wrong direction you are trapped.

So, why can't humans have their own traffic lights? Why can't humans have their own signs that would aid them in the right place?

If humans do have it, maybe, just maybe, i wouldn't have fallen for you unexpectedly and i wouldn't be feeling trapped and hurt all by myself in this wrong lonely road.

-

Photo credits : http://www.bridgepointroadmarkings.com

[lyssavillanueva]

This is just another failed love story in the world

If I’d tell you the story of my love story, it would probably make you bored simply because unlike anybody else, in my twenty three years of existence, I find everything I know about love insignificant and undeniably unnecessary. I am talking about all the puppy loves and the fairy books which has become the standard of what I know what love should be.

To be honest, I still believe in those happy endings and the “oh so perfect boy meets girl” love story. Maybe, you can never take it away from me. However, there came someone who has, in some way able to penetrate my thought of love, make me question my beliefs and even make me feel strong and weak all at the same time.

Now if you are thinking that I am romantically linked with this certain person, no, you are wrong. I don’t have in any other way than friendship have a connection with him. But if you’d ask me if I somehow, have fallen for him, I’d cock my head to the side and think, “I really don’t know.”

If he would be able to hear this kind of thoughts, he will raise his hand,               go through his bushy hair and say “Lai, let’s talk.” But he won’t sound serious, rather he’d sound like a teacher teaching his student—because this guy is someone who unconsciously taught me a lot of things. And revealing of feelings might be like a lecture to him as well.

He’d probably elaborate reasons why I am feeling such way about him, and the reasons why I should not pursue this. I won’t bother listening to him, I think, because I would just probably say that I was joking. If he’d take it seriously, i really don’t know.

You see, I always come back to that phrase: “I really don’t know.”

But here’s what I know: He is someone I really like talking with, or more like, I say, listening to. It’s not just because I learn a lot from all his crooked opinion and beliefs—which he can always defend why  and why not—but because I always discover something about myself that I never really knew when I listen to him.

Life, random stupid questions, sex (not that I have one) and even the fucking love stories of my life, I was able to tell him. He was also able to open my mind into things I never knew I was ready to embrace. He can effortlessly change my opinion about something and I would just always find myself nodding at his words.

And whenever he gave out his opinions, I am enthralled yet afraid of his words. Because his words matter more than I ever thought it will. The same way I feel about him. I never really realized that me getting excited just with the thought of seeing him and feeling sulky with the way he walks away mattered in a way I never thought it will.

Looking back at it, I never should’ve let myself fall for his words, because I cannot even mutter an answer—the real answer I want to tell him. I never should’ve looked at his way because he wouldn’t see me as he is looking the other way. More importantly, I never should’ve made him matter that it he already occupies something inside that should never have been in there. And this is what makes me weak: knowing very well that I cannot even control my own emotions. Every single fucking day.

Are you getting bored now? I told you, nothing is even exciting to this freaking love story of mine. Don’t worry, the story of what should’ve been, what never was and what never will be that is my life will end soon.

And this is another bullet to the long list of the failed love stories in the world: A girl looking at a guy’s back because possibility of them being together is synonymous to the words impossible.

[lyssavillanueva]

Ibajay, Aklan

February 2017

[lyssavillanueva]

Lai x Travels : THE CIRCLE HOSTEL

If you have been following my blog--that is when I am able to fight off my lazy self and be a diligent blogger again--I have recently discovered the wonders of unplanned travels. And I have yet experienced another kind of right off the hook travel which I will be documenting in a few days more.

Rather, in this post I will tell you how that unplanned travel kept me sane simply because of 3 reasons:

Nice Destination (YEP!!!!)

Nice People, not to mention very accommodating!

 Nice Place To STAY--and this made all the difference!

If you’re looking for a place where you can escape the hustle and bustle of the City but don’t want to go that far, and you’re in a very tight budget, THE CIRCLE HOSTEL has got you covered.

For my recent trip we stayed in The Circle Hostel Zambales, specifically located in San Felipe, Liwliwa Zambales. The Circle Hostel wouldn’t just satisfy your need for a good home away from home, they’d also fill your artsy soul and free spirited self away with all the hippie feels of their place!

I mentioned earlier that trip was a spontaneous one that a day before we even leave the city, we aren’t sure where to go. So I called for the hostel, to check if we can still reserve slots for a group of 10. It isn’t easy to book such large number of people but I guess we were really lucky that the hostel was still able to accommodate us and told us that we can even pay on site--less hassle for reservation deposits!

However, when we arrived at the place our slots were already taken by another group who was able to pay their deposits in advance. Luckily, the receptionist, Ate Virgie and ate Vangie offered us an alternative--tents by the beach! We agreed to take the offer since it will be a new experience for us to sleep by the beach and be able to see the sunrise just right when we wake up. 

Each tents are good for 4-5 pax. Since we are a group of 10, they gave us two of their biggest tents. You don’t need to worry if you don’t know how to set up tents (just like us) they will be ones to set it up for you. They’ll also provide you mats to sleep on inside the tent. 

And though we are sleeping in tents that night we are still able to maximize the amenities offered by the hostel just like the kitchen and the common room. For our other things that we couldn’t take with us on the tent since we will just sleep there for a night, we also made use of their lockers which are free of charge for all the guest to keep our things safe. No worries if you don’t have a lock, you can rent theirs for 20 php!   

The advantage of sleeping near the beach--being able to see the sun set and rise!

THE BEACH

Liwliwa Beach is a good 3-5 Min walk away from the hostel. So it is better if you bring mats and your other paraphernalia with you so you won’t be walking to and fro the hostel. As for us, it was convenient on the first night as most of our things are settled in the tent. 

ACCOMMODATIONS

Aside from the tent (350/night) option, there are two other guest accommodations you can enjoy and chose from while you’re in The Circle Hostel. 

One is the hammock (350/ night). In all of the resorts i’ve been to in the past it was the first time I saw a place offer a hammock for a place to sleep. Unique right? Cute pa!

Second is the bunked bed (450/night) where in you can have a bed complete with beddings and pillows. Mosquito nets and fans are also provided. The first time i saw the beds, i describe them as “Pang-Disney Princess!” HAHAHA. 

Just in case you are curious, both accommodations are well kept as they immediately remove the beddings/ the hammock and launder them right after a guest leaves. We saw them do that while we were settling in our beds for the second night. This is a very big check for me!

AMENITIES

Aside from radiating the “artsy” feels all the over the  place, the circle hostel  promotes #ThereAreNoStrangers campaign which encourage their guests to mingle and get to know other people thru their common rooms. There are two common rooms/  places at the hostel where you can chill and just have a good time. And for us, we did enjoyed it by  playing jengga! 

FREE BREAKFAST AND KITCHEN AMENITIES

Every accommodation availed per  pax is  provided with free breakfast!

You can also bring your to cook food. They have a free kitchen where in you can grill and cook. It’s free to use the grill, but you will be charged 100 php  for the stove and rice cooker use.  Sulit na bes, dahil buong stay mo na sila magagamit.

Lunch for the second day! shoutout to our cooking committee! <3 Best lunch meal for the trip!

If you have any food that needs to be refrigerated (ex. hotdogs, fish) you can ask the receptionist to keep them for you in the fridge. Libre lang, walang bayad bes. 

But if you not the cooking type of guest, there are also eateries around the  place wherein you can have your meals at an affordable price! Silogs are famous in the  place and the  price ranges from 80-100 php. 

ART EVERYWHERE

What really charmed me about this place is the all over artsy ambiance.  Vandals, graffiti and just scribbles can be found mostly on the walls. To be honest, I had fun looking at every corner, reading different words written by different  people. Isn’t it nice to be able to see what mark  people before you has left behind? It somehow felt like i was making a connection to different strangers--except that #ThereAreNoStrangers in this place! 

HOW TO GET THERE

From Cubao ride a bus going to Iba, Zambales  (We rode Victory Liner from Cubao) - 320 php/ pax|  Travel time is 5- 6 hrs

Drop of at San Felipe

From there, you can ride a tricycle going to The Circle Hostel - 30 php / pax      

Alternate Route: 

From Cubao ride a bus going to Olongapo. - 207 php (this is just an estimation as we took this route going back to Manila.)   Travel time is 1hr. 

Drop off at the Olongapo Terminal. From there, you can ride buses bound to San Felipe. Ordinary bus ride - 61php / pax |  Travel time is 5- 6 hrs

Drop of at San Felipe.

From there, you can ride a tricycle going to The Circle Hostel - 30 php / pax

CONTACTS

You can reach The Circle Hostel via their social media sites 

Website:http://thecirclehostel.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thecirclehostel/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thecirclehostel/

As for the Zambales branch, we were able to reserve slots via phone: 

09173055391 - Look for Ate Vangie or Ate Virgie

Thank you for making our stay wonderful, The Circle Hostel! <3

[lyssavillanueva]

Lai x Eats : CAFE PRESSION

In pursuit of a should be afternoon of Planetarium show, Emil (my friend) and I rushed from an event to National Museum of the Philippines. It was already around 3:30 PM and we are both aware that the last show will start 30 minutes later, hence we are already telling ourselves that there is a high chance that we won’t be able to go in and watch. And yes, when we arrived--the show just ended. Nagdilang anghel kami, bes!

So instead of sinking our hearts because of a failed attempt to watch the Planetarium show, we decided to roam around Intramuros and find a place to eat. We ended up in Cafe Pression, a cafe just across the Manila Bulletin building. They are located on the third floor of Intra Mall and hindi naman sila ganon katago kaya makikita mo agad, bes. :)

Crib type cafes are very prominent nowadays since they give the customers more privacy, and Cafe Pression is no different. However, what made our stay superb was that there were only a few guests around so the place is quiet and you can enjoy your bonding time over food.  We even have the guts to shoot around dahil konti lang ang tao bes! Photoshoot galore, diba?

Spot the awkward leg pose. HAHAHA

As for their food, they offer a variety of cakes, pastas, sandwiches, frappes, non-caffeinated drinks and other specialties. Since we were looking for something heavy to fill our stomachs, we opted to try their Cheese Ramyeon (150 PHP) and Chocolate Milkshake (150 PHP).  

As for our dessert, we passed on the cakes and opted to have the French Toast with Honey (160 PHP) It’s the one in the middle with a giant whipped cream.  *I hope I got the name of the food right. I can’t remember it clearly* :P

Not a very good combination, i might say. But then the Cheese Ramyeon was superb! <3

We spent almost three hours on the cafe and I can say that I definitely enjoyed the place as we were able to catch up on chikas while lying around our area. Oh, diba, parang bahay lang! 

Cafe Pression is open on Mon- Sun from 10 AM - 10 PM

Address: Third Floor, Intra Mall, Escuela Street, Intramuros, Manila 

Apprx Budget for two (based on our expenses) : 760 PHP

Details from Zomato

HOW TO GET THERE: 

From Recto / Avenida:

You can ride a jeepney going to Manila City Hall / SM Manila.  (8 PHP)

Drop off at SM Manila. From there, you can take the underpass going to Intramuros.

Take Muralla Street (Landmark: Manila Bulletin building)  then turn right to Recoletos Street then turn right to Escuela Street. 

You can find the Intra Mall Building from there. Remember it’s on the third floor!

This post is not sponsored.

[lyssavillanueva]

Intramuros, Manila. 2017

[lyssavillanueva]

I like talking.  I like having conversations with different people. But most of the time, when I converse, I don’t talk much, rather, I listen. Very well.

Because as much I like reading and writing stories, I also love hearing them.

I love finding out stories with different perspectives from a variety of people. I want to find out what made them happy, sad or confused. I want to be able to hear the wonderful voice of amazement when they relay a memorable moment. I want to be able to travel through a person’s words and experience a different world through their eyes. Nothing is as priceless as being able to learn new things upon talking with people.

Though I may not talk much during the conversation, I swear to you that everything is embedded on me--I am taking mental notes during the whole conversation (if am not recording it on my phone. With permission, that is!)  

And those very notes will be translated into written words. A whole new story comprised by a number of different stories. A story that will not only tell you about how a boy meets girl, but it will also make you  earn a piece of memory or experience of someone, in the in betweens. 

[lyssavillanueva]

[lyssavillanueva]

Before the dawn.