NCT Kun- Love is All Seeing
“Would you like to order now?”
I pulled my eyes from the menu I’ve been staring at for the passed hour “Could I just have a little bit more time?” She gave me a weak smile nodding “Sure hun,” she said walking off to take care of other tables. I sighed looking at my sweating glass in front of me, an hour, that’s how long I’ve been waiting for my boyfriend’s arrival. I could literally feel the pity radiating off of the people at the tables next to me, even the young teenager at the table across from me was looking at me apologetically because even she knew. I was being stood up.
I felt stupid for putting myself in this situation, the moment he asked me on another date I knew he was going to stand me up, but I accepted anyway with the slightest bit of hope that maybe this time would be different. And now here I am stuck in this awkward situation with everyone looking at me with pitiful gazes. I decided that the only thing left for me to do was leave, expect I had no idea how to do it without embarrassing myself. I gently put my phone in my purse pulling out my wallet to at least leave a few dollars for the nice waitress who didn’t kick me out even after a full hour.
“Sorry I’m so late babe!” I lifted my gaze up to see a boy I’ve never recognized weaving his way through the tables towards me “Traffic was so crazy right now,” he said shrugging off his jacket taking the chair across from me. I couldn’t help but stare at him, his deep brown eyes, his light brown hair that fell messily around his face. His cute nerdy sweater and normal blue skinny jeans, and he smelled fresh and clean. He leaned in and I copied him “I’m Kun, just go with it yeah? Whoever didn’t bother to show up is a jerk,” he whispered giving me a sweet smile, “Y/n,” I replied deciding to go along with it because he was being sweet. Also, he’s probably the most adorable person I’ve ever seen.
“Well since I’m so late what do you say we just get out of here?” he asked tilting his head to the side, I nodded before collecting my things deciding maybe this handsome stranger could change my night. We walked out of the busy restaurant and he quickly took my hand in his lacing our fingers together as we walked by the window. I knew it was all just for show but I couldn’t help the warmth that crept on my cheeks. “So do you regularly go around saving girls or am I just lucky?” I asked with a fake laugh, he smiled to himself “Actually… I saw you when I went to practice, and I just got done and you were still there so I knew something wasn’t right.” he gently swayed our hands as we walked the streets.
I nodded “I knew he was going to stand me up,” I admitted looking down at my feet “But I just wanted to have someone you know?” I explained. I let out a soft chuckle “You know what?” I looked at him, he raised his eyebrows in curiosity “I don’t think people take enough time to enjoy anything, we all are just waiting for what next. We’re living our lives fast forward, never stopping to enjoy the moments we have, we just rush into what’s next. So, we can get on with whatever we’re supposed to be or do with our lives.” I stopped the two of us under a lamppost and I noticed he had some confetti in his hair. I reached up brushing it out “I just think to myself… this it is. This is my life. I better slow down, enjoy it, because one day I won’t be here to live this moment and that’ll be it.”
“You’re right,” he said before taking a deep breath “You know I’ve never actually seen the night sky over Han river… Should we go?” he said giving me a hopeful smile, a contagious one that I couldn’t help return “That sounds awfully close to a date,” I teased him. He rubbed the back of his neck “I’m just- you know-” he stuttered getting me to giggle, “I’m be glad to accompany you to Han river,” I said getting him to sigh in relief. We walked side by side “So, besides saving damsels in distress, what are you doing out so late?” I asked him, “Oh practicing,” he said nonchalantly, I furrowed my eyebrows “Practicing what?” I questioned. “Oh, well, dancing, singing. I’m a trainee for the SM company,” he said, I smirked “So you can sing well I assume?” he shrugged.
“Okay, I won’t make you sing… At least not yet,” I teased him, “And you? What are you doing?” he questioned politely, “Nothing as exciting as you, but I am going to university,” I said. “No that’s good, exciting even, do you know what you’re going for?” he asked, I shrugged my shoulders “Haven’t decided yet,” I told him, “That’s okay, remember what you said we don’t need to rush life,” he told me. “So who’s your ideal type?” I asked changing the topic, his eyes widened for a second “what do you mean?” he asked looking back at me, “Well clearly mine are douchebags who stand you up on dates, please tell me yours is better than that,” I said. “Well… I just love people who are themselves, truly utterly freely themselves. I don’t care about anything else really,” he said.
I smiled looking over his handsome face as it turned to a look of awe “The stars reflected on the river it’s-” “breathtaking,” I said smiling slightly, he nodded his head “Yeah wow,” he headed towards the waters edge. I followed him looking at the scenery, it was like a painting come to life, and he was like a marble statue come to life. I sighed shaking my head “Sing something for me,” I said softly, he rubbed the back of his neck “I’m really not singing recently-” “Stop making excuses and sing for me,” I said sitting down on a cool patch of grass, he nodded before joining me on the grass, “Any preference?” he asked, I smiled at his sudden shyness and shook my head no “Anything’s good with me.”
“Please don’t see…. Just a boy caught up in dreams and fantasies. Please see me, reaching out for someone I cant see. Take my hand lets see where we wake up tomorrow..” His voice was actually like an angel had come down for heaven just to sing this song for me. He paused after the chorus “No no keep going,” I whined getting him to chuckle before singing once again, but pulling out his phone I only just now realized had been buzzing like crazy. “Do you need to answer someone?” I questioned, he sighed “No-not technically, it’s just the young ones whining for me to come home and cook for them,” he explained shoving his phone back in his pocket. “I don’t know how to cook well, but I’m a great apprentice,” I offered, he raised an eyebrow looking at me “you really want to cook for 7 boys?” he asked.
I shrugged my shoulders “If it means I get to know you better than sure,” I said standing up, “Also you might have to sing for me some more,” I teased holding my hand out to him. He took it allowing me to help pull him onto his feet. “Fair warning, they can be a bit of a handful,” he said leading me down the streets of Seoul to a fancy looking dormitory, “You live here?” I asked, he nodded his head “There’s a lot of us though so don’t think like it’s this fancy penthouse I live in,” he explained pulling out a card and swiping it so that the door unlocked and the two of us could get in. I looked around the lobby as we walked towards the elevators, then the two of us got in, I could tell he was nervous by the way he was tapping his foot “I can stand a few boys Kun,” I said in hopes to ease his mood.
“There’s a lot more than you think, and the house is probably disgusting… If I’d known-” I giggled getting him to look at me in confusion “We just met, if you think I expect your dorm to be clean than I’d be crazy,” I said as we walked down the hall to one of the few doors. He sighed before opening the door and a cloud of noise coming to slap me in the face “Welcome to the dorm,” he said leading the way inside. He was right to say that it wasn’t clean, also that there were boys everywhere, at least seven of them were just in the living room. “Kun Hyung!—Girl?” a younger one stopped looking at us “Y/n,” I said sticking my hand out which didn’t matter because they all came to surround us saying names and asking questions.
“She came here to help me cook for you all so maybe do her a solid and let her breath,” Kun said ushering them to take a step back from the two of us. “You know how to cook?” the shy one Jisung asked, I shook my head no “But I’ll try,” I replied shooting him a wink before following Kun into the kitchen. “So why do like a thousand of you live here?” I asked as he pulled out a pan and a variety of different vegetables, “Well- chops those please- My group NCT there’s 18 of us but we’re all broken into sub-units,” he explained while we both worked on preparing food “What are the sub-units?” I asked. “We have Dream which are the young ones, NCT-U and NCT 127,” he explained to me I nodded in understanding.
“And you know which one he’s in?” Renjun asked getting my attention, “Sure,” I replied with a smile “He isn’t in one!” he said before giggling and running away. I look over at Kun who was smiling and going along with that little joke but I could see through it, the irritation, the jealousy, underlying sadness. “Well his voice is beautiful so I’m sure they’re just waiting for a concept that perfectly shows it off,” I replied looking over at the younger boys “You’ve heard him sing?” Mark the slightly older of the bunch asked, I nodded my head “I made him sing to me down by Han river,” I told them. I looked back at Kun who was happily cooking trying his best not to let his smile rip his face open, apparently these boys don’t give him a chance to breathe. “First batch is almost done,” he called to the younger ones “Wrestle for it!” Hanchan yelled as they began this competition.
I could see why Haechan wanted to wrestle because he was fairly good at it, he managed to pin every other member down and proudly smirked as the others whined in protest. “No I won fair and square,” he told those who’d complain, “No actually you didn’t win yet,” I said walking over to them tying my hair up in a pony, he raised an eyebrow looking at me “You want to wrestle?” he asked tilting his head. “I’m hungry too,” I replied with a sweet smile before getting in position, “Okay but I’m not going easy on you because you’re a girl,” he warned, “Woman,” I corrected getting the boys to ooooohhhh and then Mark counted down. As expected he was basically just trying to throw all his weight onto me, so I grabbed his shoulders, used his momentum against him and flipped him over my hip getting him to land on the carpet with a loud thud.
Clearly he wasn’t expecting the blow because he’d gotten the wind knocked out of him, so I gently placed my knee on his chest “I think you just got beaten by a girl,” I told him getting the other boys to snicker. He shook his head no “Woman,” he panted getting me to smile before standing up and offering my hand to help him up “I still won though,” I giggled before skipping over to the kitchen where there was already a plate warm and ready. I happily sat on one of the counter chairs and began eating while Kun was busy cooking the next “Where’d you learn to fight like that?” he asked over the rambunctious boys who were trying to replicate what I had just done “Oh, I have three brothers,” I replied with a shrug taking a huge bite.
“Really?” he asked, I nodded my head “Yeah, two little ones and one older one, Wilson the oldest is Haechan’s age and he plays first table on the chess team,” I said while getting another bite “Chester is Jisung’s age and he used to cry every time he heard a sad song, and my older brother Dan….” I chewed on my lip looking at him to see he was listening intently despite the noise and that he was basically cooking nine meals. “I haven’t told anyone this before, but I’m going to tell you,” I told him, “Dan can really rock a cocktail dress and six inch heels,” I said getting him to raise his eyebrows in curiosity “And I wasn’t going to let anyone give them shit for any of that. So I had to learn to beat up people bigger than me pretty early on,” I explained before I continued eating.
“Sounds like an interesting childhood,” he said before plating the rest of the food, “One girl against three boys, it was one hell of a ride,” I said with a giggle as the rest of the boys walked over to us. “So three brothers? And you want to date Kun,” Haechan said getting Kun to go red “We’re just- Not-” he stuttered to find an answer getting me to smile “He’s proven better than anyone I do know,” I replied getting Kun to smile. So, instead of going on a date with some douchebag who stood me up I ended up going on a date with at least ten boys in a small but fancy dorm where they relentlessly teased the eldest, but he took it well and let them get on with their teasing, it was kind of cute actually, how well he took care of his members.
“I should probably go,” I said getting a few whines in protest, “They’re attached now,” Kun teased before following me to the door, “I’ll walk you out of the building,” he said when I looked at him confused as he put his shoes on. “If he doesn’t date her I will,” I heard one of them sigh, “Noona! Call me,” Haechan said with a smirk getting the other boys to shove him and tell him to shut up. Kun and I left the loud apartment and a calming quiet came over the two of us. I watched him still trying to figure him out. There are people who are rays of sunshine, cherry blossoms, vanilla candles and colors of dusk. There are people who are marble floors, roman temples, black ink, and the smell of earth after rain. There are people who are star-gazing, holding your breath, little smiles, subtle touches and soft fabric.
And then there’s him. I don’t quite know what he is, but it’s certainly not anything I’ve listed. His members, all 18 of them fall into one category or another and I haven’t even met them, but I’ve know him the longest and still I’m not quite sure how to label him. “Under normal circumstances my first dates would be a lot better,” he said as we stopped at the front door “This is a date?” he rubbed the back of his neck “I mean, kind of right?” I smiled and nodded “Under normal circumstances where would’ve we gone?” I asked him. He let his hand drop “Well, I don’t know…. Walking around Seoul and taking in the pretty views was great… I wouldn’t have introduced you to the dreamies so early though,” he said getting flustered with the question, it was cute, “If you’re not too busy,” I said pulling out my phone “Could you text me sometimes?” I asked handing him my phone wanting him to put his number in it.
He smiled brightly “most definitely,” he replied before quickly writing his name and putting his number in before handing it back “No no take a picture,” I whined shoving it back in his hand “Of me?” he blushed, I giggled “Of course!” I said. He nodded before carefully holding my phone up taking a picture of himself holding his two fingers up. He shyly handed my phone back to me and I smiled “awe so cute,” I cooed “yeah yeah whatever stop embarrassing me,” he complained. I looked at him “Promise you’ll at least text me,” I said, he nodded but that wasn’t good enough for me. I held out my pinky and he chuckled lacing it through mine before stamping it with our thumbs. His hand was warm, or maybe mine was, either way I liked it “I like the way your hand feels in mine,” I admitted looking at him.
“I have never seen someone smile like an idiot at their phone as much as you have the passed month. Who the hell are you talking to?” I quickly locked my phone and looked over at my brother “No one,” I replied innocently, he rolled his eyes walking over to sit down on my bed next to me “Is he at least cute?” he asked getting me to blush. “Yeah,” I mumbled crossing my arms over my chest “So when do we get to meet him,” the other butthead asked “Hopefully never, can you both get out of my room now?” I whined tossing a pillow at one of them. “Probably not.” I groaned getting up and storming my way into my eldest brothers room “I hate them,” I complained slamming the door shut behind me before falling dramatically on the bed.
“Because you won’t tell us about this guy you’re sickenly obsessed with?” he asked not taking his eyes away from his computer “You would be two if you knew,” I said rolling over so I was now on my back. He turned away from his computer to look at me “Then indulge me, we all want to know,” he said, I sighed sitting up “He’s a member of NCT his name is Kun and his adorable,” I said quickly with a pout. “Really you landed an idol? I mean props,” he said with a smirk “I haven’t seen him since we met though, so maybe he isn’t all that wild about me,” I admitted feeling slightly embarrassed.
“Hey, you said he’s a fuckin idol right? What time does he have. Also, if you want to see him in person just tell him, boys are so thick headed sometimes, just call him,” he advised, I looked at him worried “And if he doesn’t?” I whispered, he shrugged “Then he’s just another asshole who wasn’t good enough for my baby sister,” he replied before turning back to his computer. “Can’t blame a girl for trying,” he told me. I took a deep breath before pulling out my phone to see he had just responded, which means he was using his phone right? I clicked the dial number and it started ringing immanently showing the cute picture I had forced him to take. I watched it ring until I heard the muffled sound of a voice calling out. I quickly brought my phone to my ear “Yeah hi, Kun, it’s me Y/n,” I said closing my eyes and rubbing my forehead, trying to ignore the fact that I was being incredibly cringey.
He chuckled “yeah, I know, caller ID,” he said, I let out a soft laugh “yeah right, so I was wondering if your busy or not because I was thinking it’d be cool if we could meet up sometime,” I put my hand over my mouth and sighed thinking how idiotic I must sound, my brothering snickering beside me. I sent him a quiet middle finger “That would be lovely, the boys and I are actually shooting this thing at the local carnival, we’re done in like a half hour if you want to meet me here,” he offered getting me to smile slightly “You’re not going to tell me to come and then not be there right?” I teased him, “Cross my heart I’ll be here, front gate,” he assured me with a chuckle. “Okay then I guess I’ll see you shortly,” I mumbled getting off my brothers bed “I’ll be waiting.”
I hung up my phone and looked at my brother “We’re meeting,” I squealed dancing a little in victory, “And what are you going to wear?” he asked looking me over. “Like some jeans and a shirt,” I replied, he gave me a judging look “What?” I asked, he stood up walking over to his closet shaking his head “You really like this boy, you probably want to kiss him, maybe wow him a little bit,” he said getting me to blush at all his statements. “I have some old things that are a little too small for me but they should fit you,” he added before taking out a cute flowy blue skirt, and a cropped white laced tank top. He walked over holding it up to me “Yeah this should do,” he said as I took them from him. “Stop acting like you don’t love getting to dress me up,” I said as he sat back down at his computer “Whatever get ready for your date,” he said.
I left his room and went back into mine to see it wasn’t infested with little brothers and quickly shut and locked my door to change into the clothes my brother had picked out, it was cute, but a little cold so I took a very pale peach colored cardinal. I looked in the mirror and put on some make up on, not too much but enough, and then I pulled on some sandals and pulled my hair half up. I walked out of my room and quietly passed my brothers who were in the living room, I picked up my wallet and quietly walked out the door. I hailed a cab before paying them to take me to the nearby carnival, I couldn’t help the butterflies that fluttered in my stomach at the thought of seeing Kun again. I thanked the man before getting out of the car and nervously walking to the front gate where I paid for my ticket and stood there.
“I wasn’t sure if you’d be here by now…. Oh wow,” I turned around and meet the owner of the sweet voice, his eyes wide as he looked me up and down. “Thanks,” I said tucking my hair behind my ears, “you’re not so bad yourself,” I said giving him a smile, he nervously fiddled with his shirt “I was styled to look like this it’s-” “Soft,” I said fixing his collar nodding in approval “I like it.” he smiled softly “My manager gave me the extra tickets so we can basically do whatever you want,” he said pulling them out of my pockets. “How good are you at the games?” I asked pointing to the ring toss game, “Well according to the boys I suck so I’d say subpar,” he explained, I sighed “Well what are you good at? I need real competition,” I teased.
“The ball and can thing I was okay at,” he said, I nodded familiar with the game “Okay let’s go,” I said before walking through the tents to find the correct one. “For us,” Kun said giving the man enough tickets for the both of us and then the man gave us the balls, “Okay, so the winner gets to pick the prize the other has to wear it for the rest of the time we’re here,” I said tossing one of the balls up and catching it “You think you’re that good?” he asked raising both eyebrows in amusement, I shrugged “My brothers make me very competitive,” I replied. “Alright, you’re going to look very hot in that tiny cowboy hat,” he teased before throwing the first ball knocking the first stack over. “Well you’d look hot in it too,” I replied before tossing the ball only I managed to knock one down.
“Shut up bad luck!” I said after he let a giggle out, we both threw the next two balls and of course he managed to do perfect and I only got a few cans down. “Looks like we have a winner,” the man said walking over to the two of us “Turn around,” Kun said taking my shoulders turning me around “It’s a surprise,” he added, I rolled my eyes “Please don’t pick out those giant sunglasses, they don’t stay on my face,” I complained. “I wouldn’t pick the most hideous thing, I have to be seen with you,” he said standing in front of me “A fairy necklace?” I asked with a giggle, “It’s kind of cute,” he told me before pulling it around my neck. I smiled running my fingers over it, I looked up to then see another stand had just gotten a fresh batch of mini donuts out. “Oh yum!” I squealed before running over to the stand grabbing his hand in the process.
“These are the best part of the fair,” I promised waiting in line “When I was little my brothers and I would save all our tickets so we could buy as many donuts as we possibly could,” I giggled at the memory “Once each of us took home two baskets, our mom wasn’t happy but none of us got any cavities,” I continued to blab, but he smiled and used some of the tickets to buy a bucket of donuts. He handed it to me and I smiled happily shoving one into my mouth before letting out a soft groan “it’s gotta be what heaven tastes like, try one,” I said as we mindlessly walked the fair grounds. He shook his head no “I can’t I’m on a diet,” he said getting me to furrow my eyebrows “You’re on a diet?” I asked not understanding this logic.
He nodded slightly embarrassed “My cheeks are a little chubby so,” I stopped getting him to stop and I turned before lifting my hand and poking his cheek bone, and shook my head “No not chubby, in fact I think you need more pudge there,” I said before grabbing a small donut and holding it up to his lips, “For old memories,” I said in a cute voice, he rolled his eyes before opening his mouth allowing me to pop the donut in. He nodded in agreement “It’s good,” he admitted mouth half full, “Good I can’t eat this whole thing myself,” I replied as I started walking “I really shouldn’t-” “We’ll walk it off, don’t worry about it,” I replied making him join me and eating the donuts as we got in line for a rollercoaster, “you’ve probably been on all these rides huh?” I asked.
“Not this one actually,” he said softly before putting a donut in his mouth “Why was it too scary?” I teased and he chuckled rubbing the back of his neck “ really? If you don’t wanna go on it we don’t have to,” I told him. “No, no I should be fine right it’s just a ride? I’ll close my eyes,” he said as we moved forward in the line, “You’re a soft boy,” I teased getting him to roll his eyes “it’s cute,” I said as we removed our loose items putting them somewhere safe as we get into the seats, “Last chance to back out,” I told him, “no, I’ll be fine,” he said giving me a timid smile. I took his hand in mine and laced my fingers between each of his “I’ll just hold you,” I told him softly. He nodded as the ride started his eyes closing right away, his fingers holding onto me tightly, but I didn’t mind.
I raised our hands in the air and screamed along as we went, the whole time Kun had his eyes squeezed shut tight we slowly came to a stop and a patted his arm “we’re done now,” I cooed getting him to open his eyes and look around and breath a sigh in relief. We got off of the ride and grabbed our things, I almost forgot we were holding hands until he dragged me to a stop “We don’t have many tickets left,” he said, I hummed stepping closer looking at them, “Well there’s enough to ride another roller coaster,” I said before looking up at his nervous face “Or the Ferris wheel,” I said, he did his best to hid his smile “Isn’t that a bit cliché?” he asked scrunching up his nose, I shrugged “who cares,” I said before pulling him towards the ride.
Not many people were in line so we got on quite quickly “You’re not afraid of heights right?” I asked him as the person locked us in the chair, “No, no, are you?” he asked, I shrugged my shoulders “Maybe a little? But you went on a roller coaster for me so I think it’s only fair,” I said. “These things are really safe, so don’t worry about-” he stopped talking the moment I picked his arm up and wrapped it around my shoulder, “I’ll just hold you,” he said getting me to giggle as we went up “Oh God,” I muttered curling into his side not wanting to look at the ground but of course as much as you don’t want to you do because it doesn’t make logical sense. I swallowed hard “hey, look at the stars,” he said tilting my chin up, but I looked towards him. Luminescent sprinkles of lights scatter across the dark sky offering a small lingering glow that surrounds the two of us.
I study every part of him, his deep brown eyes that crinkle in the corners every time he smiles, he looked at me and they shined as he brushed hair out of my face. His squishy jaw, his soft tanned skin, the way the red of his lips plump out just begging to be kissed. I place my free hand on his chest so I could feel every rapid beat of his heart, thudding in the same sweet rhythm as mine. He pulls me closer, so close I could feel every curve of his body. I breathe him in, the sweet scent of warm vanilla and peppermint. His fingers trailed my back before weaving through my hair before running his fingers over my scalp. We both moved in at the same time, our lips meeting somewhere in the middle, moving in a burst of passion. My body sets afire, every inch of me tingling with warmth spreads through me.
I melt into him an intoxicating rush coursing through my veins. My fingers clamped around his sweater but he didn’t seem to mind as his tongue slid across my lower lip. Innocent boy maybe not so innocent. I opened my mouth and his tongue gently traveled into my mouth, exploring every part he could, his breathing becoming heavier, never becoming satisfied. It wasn’t long before the rolls were switched and he allowed me to shove my tongue into his mouth. If there wasn’t a heavy bar holding me in place I would’ve climbed into his lap, legs either side of his hips, hands on his cheeks, but instead I leaned clutching his shirt tightly, our lips never satisfied.
He pulled back so that the tips of our nose were touching “I couldn’t stop thinking about what it’d feel like to kiss you,” he admitted before turning his head to look the other way, slowly moving over slightly. “I can’t believe I said that out loud, please just excuse me while I go die of embarrassment,” he mumbled rubbing his face, I smiled before taking his chin and pulling it back towards me, he looked at me slightly embarrassed and I smiled leaning up pressing a chaste kiss to his lips “I thought about kissing you too,” I said before letting go of his chin. “I like hearing your voice after a hard day of practice,” he said tracing his fingers over my arm, “I like falling asleep to your singing voice.” We slowly descended down the lazily whispering sweet nothings to each other.
We got off the ride but neither of us pulled from the other, his arm still over my shoulders, mine around his torso “I don’t want to go home,” I complained curling into his side. “You’ll freeze in that outfit,” he replied, “Not when I’m this close to you,” I replied in a singing voice. He chuckled “Being this close to you I can tell you’re freezing- you’re shaking like a leaf,” he replied, I shook my head before leaning it against him “Who knows when I’d see you again?” I said softly, he stopped wrapping his arms around my neck. I looked up at him “Come to the dorm next Friday,” he told me, I raised an eyebrow “That’s awfully soon,” I teased, he nodded “I know it’s just… I want the members to know I’m the first one to have… a girl,” he said.
I smirked “I’m your girl now?” I asked raising an eyebrow, he let out a chuckle of slight embarrassment “I mean- I thought- I would like it-” he was a stumbling mess of words, I giggled “Will you call me every night this week?” I asked, I could see he was about to come up with a million reasons why it wouldn’t always work “I don’t care how late or if you just say my name, I request a call,” I told him. He nodded his head before smiling slightly “sure” he replied, I stepped on my tip toes pressing my lips to his for a sweet kiss “I’ll see you Friday,” I whispered softly.
“I’m at the front gate,” I said leaning against the locked gate, “I’m on my way, I’m running down the stairs,” he said breathless, “Hurry I’m cold,” I complained with a pout. “Running… out… the door,” he panted, I turned around to see him literally running towards me. He hung up on me before pushing a button getting the gate to open “Maybe you should go-” he pressed his lips to mine wrapping his arms around my body pulling me against his slender one, getting me to melt into him, placing my hands on his chest. “I missed you,” he said pressing his forehead against mine, I smiled “Seems like you missed my lips,” I teased, he kissed them once again “Amongst other things,” he side before kissing me one last time.
“Also you look way too dressed up for a movie night,” he said looking me over, my jeans and sweatshirt, I pouted looking at him “You didn’t inform me,” I complained, he shook his head “It’s okay, I’m sure I have something,” he said taking my hand in his and leading me towards the building “I don’t have run the stairs right?” I teased, he shook his head “I know you’re against dieting so I’m assuming you’re against exercise,” he teased. I giggled placing a hand over my heart “You know me so well,” I cooed jokingly as we got on the elevator, he quickly pressed the shut button. He then ran his fingers through his hair, “Are you nervous?” I asked, he looked at me “No, no,” he assured me with a smile, “you seem nervous,” I told him.
Which he was, his muscles were all tense, he was very fidgety, and he looked completely exhausted. “Maybe a little,” he admitted looking at me, “It’s just all the members will be there and 17 boys can be a lot,” he said, “Relax, I’ve met more than half of them already, and we’re just watching a movie,” I said stepping towards him. I placed my hands on his arms “Besides the little ones already adore me,” I cooed getting him to smile slightly “Yeah maybe a little too fondly,” he muttered. I giggled taking a step in front of him “Everything will be fine,” it told him before the door opened “It’s time,” I told him taking his hand leading him out of the elevator. We walked to the familiar door and he unlocked the front door getting a rush of young boys to greet us like bumbling puppies.
“Noona it’s a pajama party why are you in jeans?” Haechan asked, but Kun held onto my hand leading me passed all of them “I’m changing now,” I replied as I followed him down the hall to a room I assumed was his “uhhhh,” he said to himself walking over to the closets pulling out a comfy sweat shirt giving it to me, “I don’t think any of my pants will fit you,” he mumbled. “Boxers?” I asked, he blinked a few times “You want to wear boxers?” he questioned, I nodded “yeah I used to steal my brothers when my shorts were dirty,” I explained, he nodded walking over to his closet before giving me some boxers. “I’ll be in the living room,” he said before leaving the room, shutting the door behind himself. I shimmied out of my jeans pulling on the boxers he had given me, looking around the room deciding his bed was probably the one that was the most neat.
I walked over while changing out of my shirt into his sweatshirt that was far too big for me, but it was comfy and I liked the smell of it. I looked at the cute pictures he had hanging from the bed above his, family, friends, song quotes, it was all super cute. I folded my clothes and placed them on his bed before deciding I should probably get out of the room. I went down the hall following the loud bickering, “Noona! There’s space on the floor by us! Jaemin has a fluffy blanket,” Haechan said patting the floor next to him. I looked at Kun who was sitting on the couch glaring at the back of Haechan’s head, I knew he was jealous, it was kind of cute actually. “That’s okay,” I said walking over the couch perching myself on Kun’s lap “I have a spot already,” I said melting into his chest.
I looked at the other boys on the couch “Who are they?” I asked tilting my head to the side, a blushing Kun introduced me to all his hyungs who were already wearing those teasing smiles. He was going to get hell later, but it was worth it having his arms around my waist, and his chin rested on my shoulder. “What are we watching?” I asked mindlessly reaching my hand up to play with his hair, it was some kind of action movie, but I didn’t really expect anything less since it was a bunch of boys who picked out the movie. Eventually my arm got tired so I dropped my hand on top of his that was gently tracing my exposed thigh. It was kind of hard to focus on the movie, I couldn’t help but overthink the looks we gave each other, and the brushes of arms and legs, our endless silent flirting.
I wanted to taste his lips and his neck and his cheeks and everything. I hadn’t been looking at the movie for the passed ten minutes, just admiring the boy beneath me, around me, next to me. I ran my fingers through his hair feeling the electricty rush through me as I have read in all of the books in my life. I slipped my arms around his neck and rested my chin on my arm facing away from the movie resting my head against his, “The movie is the other way,” he whispered into my ear, “it’s comfy,” I replied closing my eyes. His fingers traced up my back “I’m going to get shit for this,” he told me softly, I leaned and pressed a kiss to his cheek “I’ll give you shit,” I whispered getting him to blush.
It was probably the longest and most boring movie but I endured it because being with Kun was worth it. “Noona, play just dance with us,” Jaemin asked smiling brightly at me, meaning there was no way I could possibly say no to them. “Okay,” I sighed getting up standing next to all of them, “She’s competitive… just for the record,” Kun said getting me to roll my eyes at him “I’m not that competitive,” I mumbled getting him to smile to himself. I joined the boys game and at first I tried to not really care, but seeing my dancing score so low below the rest of them I didn’t want to lose. I started dancing more seriously or at least the way the controls really wanted to be moved and getting nearly all perfects. Soon enough I was at the top of the board, and when the song was all over I had officially won.
The older boys behind us started clapping and cheering for me and I turned around with a smile bowing to them “Thank you thank you,” I said giving the controller to the one closest to me “How did you get all perfects it makes no sense,” Mark complained, I shrugged my shoulders with a smirk “I guess I’m just the superior dancer,” I told them sitting down on the couch. “So Y/n where did you meet Kun Hyung,” an overly confident Lucas asked me, “well, actually,” I felt heat rising to my cheeks “I was going on this date with another guy when… well he didn’t show up actually which was kinda embarrassing because I sat at the restaurant for like an hour before Kun walked in pretending to be my boyfriend so all of the people would stop giving me pity gazes,” I said running my fingers through my hair.
“Ah prince charming strikes again,” Taeyong teased ruffling Kun’s hair, I raised an eyebrow “So he’s saved damsels in distress before?” I teased getting him to shake his head. “No, the boys just tease me because our fans think I look like a prince,” he explained, “I mean you have prince like qualities,” I said looking over his face. “So you’re his princess then,” Yuta teased me but before I could say anything Haechan spoke up “No she’s a beast, she flipped me right over onto the floor!” I shot him a glare, “So a feisty princess,” Yuta replied. “I-no I just have brothers who are almost as annoying as Donghyuck over there,” I said shooting the younger one another glare. “Come on princess let’s wrestle,” Yuta said confidently standing up.
“No I-” He took my hand and pulled me up to stand “Come on,” he said giving me an innocent smile “Yuta-” he started counting down. Once he hit one he quickly ran over to me arms out forward, so I slapped them down and hit my shoulder into his chest causing him to step back before swiping my leg behind him and pushing him down over my leg getting him to fall down on the ground. Hard. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to toss you so hard-” he chuckled waving me off “I asked for it, don’t worry about it,” he said sitting up before looking at Kun “Good luck keeping up with our little beasty here,” he added before getting up. All of them looked at me like they were impressed and slightly intimidated “Where’s the bathroom?” I asked, “Down to the end of the hall and to the right,” Taeyong said.
I nodded before walking down the hall all the way to the end and then going into the room on the right flicking on the lights only to see a single tear roll down my cheek. I shut the door behind me before walking over to the sink turning on the faucet and quickly getting my face wet, trying to make sure it looks like I didn’t just cry. It was stupid really, how emotions come back up when you think you’ve gotten over them. There was a soft knock on the door and I quickly dried off my face before pulling the door open to find Kun, “You okay?” he asked softly coming inside shutting the door behind himself. “Course, I’m fine,” I told him as he leaned back against the door “No something’s off,” he said crossing his arms over his chest looking between my eyes “And we’re not leaving this room until I figure out why,” he added.
I sighed “The way they all looked at me…” I rubbed my arm “They were impressed,” he said furrowing his eyebrows “they were intimidated by me,” I said bluntly “just like every guy I know because they’ve all seen me beat anyone who talked about my brother, that’s why I don’t like to wrestle because you’re the first guy who doesn’t flinch when I look at them,” I admitted. He smiled grabbing me around the waist with shaking hands. He was gentle, like he was scared of hurting me. I let out a fake laugh, and he looked at me like I had just played his favorite song he hadn’t heard in years, “You know I’m not going to break right? Like I just took down you’re hyung,” I said, he chuckled “I don’t there’s anyone who’s ever been gentle with you, so I’m going to,” he replied.
I rolled my eyes trying not to smile, he lifted his hand up placing it on my cheek smiling stupidly “I want to kiss you,” he said getting me to raise an eyebrow with a smirk “Why’s that?” I questioned teasingly placing my hands on his shoulders “You’re beautiful. And before that, you’re kind. And you’re smart and funny, but the exact kind of smart and funny. Because I day dream about taking long trips with you because I know I’d never get bored,” he let out a chuckle “And whenever I see something new and interesting, or new and ridiculous, I wonder what you’d say about it- or how many stars you’ve give it and why.” he paused but I knew he was going to speak again so I pressed a finger to his lip smiling “Just kiss me,” I told him softly.
He did not need to be told twice he leaned in pressing his lips to mine gently, it was warm and his lips were soft. Passion burned within the kiss, desire did too. Our eyes were closed, both of us savoring the moment. His arms wrapped around my waist, and my fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. The sound of a loud knock on the door caused us to jump slightly “Hyung? I really have to pee,” the timid voice of Jisung came out. Kun sighed opening the door and the two of us walked out getting the young one’s eyes to go wide eyed. “I should probably go home,” I whispered looking at him, he pouted “why,” he complained “Because it’s late and my brothers would kill me,” I told him, “but can’t you like just fight back?” he asked, I giggled “Not anymore I taught them how to defend themselves,” I said.
I walked into his room to collect my clothes “I can keep this for a bit?” I asked looking at the sweatshirt, “yeah sure,” he replied leaning against his bunk bed. “When can I fit in your schedule?” I asked looking at him, “It’s funny you think I won’t walk you out,” he said following me to the front door as I pulled my shoes on “It was nice meeting you all, thanks for letting barge in on the pajama party,” I said looking at the others. “It was nice meeting you too,” Jaehyun waved goodbye to me and the two of us left the dorm. “I’m serious though when will I see you again?” I said as we climbed into an elevator, “As soon as I know I’ll tell you,” he said, I nodded “Right.” we walked out of the elevator “I’ll still call you every night though… if you want,” he said.
“Please do,” I replied as we walked down to the front gate, “Can I ask you one last thing?” he said taking my arm and stopping me to face him, “Anything,” I replied. “I know I can’t offer you much, not even really my time but I want you to be my girlfriend anyways so will you-” I leaned up and pressed my lips against his for a second “I’d love to take up whatever minimal time you have to offer,” I told him before kissing him slowly once again. His nose brushed against mine “call me the minute you get home?” he whispered his breath tickling my face “I’ll let you know I made it home my prince,” I told him before kissing one last time. I pulled away from him, but he didn’t let me go “I need a picture of us,” he said pulling me back to his chest taking out his phone holding it in front of us.
“Beauty and the beast,” I said smiling, “I only see beauty,” he said kissing the top of my head while taking pictures, I tilted my head up and kissed any part of him close enough. “I seriously have to go,” I giggled before kissing him one last time, “Call me,” he said desperately “I’ll call you,” I said as I pulled open the gate looking at the lovesick boy. “I promise, go inside,” I said, but he shook his head no “not until I see you get in the cab,” he replied. I sighed before climbing into the car and watched him as he watched me, and we waved goodbye to each other. Neither of us looking away until we couldn’t see each other. And the only thing I could think about was when I was going to see him next.
I was lucky if I was able to see my boyfriend once a week, which I know isn’t much, but he kept his promise of calling me every night, which sometimes meant waking me up at three in the morning, but I didn’t mind losing sleep for him, he’s the only person I can never get tired of talking to and the only one who crosses my mind constantly throughout the day. He makes me smile without trying, bring my mood down without trying to and affect my emotions with every action of his. I can’t explain with just words how much he means to me, but he’s the only one I’m afraid of losing and the one I want to keep in my life. He’s special to me and if having to feel like I’m living a long distance relationship to a boy who’s fifteen minutes away was worth it.
“I’m going on tour with the group,” he said softly between heated kisses, I sat up holding him down on the bed “Like you get to sing and stuff?” I asked slightly breathless, “Yeah, a song or two,” he replied. I got up running my fingers through my hair “That’s actually amazing,” I said, “Jagi… come back,” he said reaching out for me “How long will you be away?” I asked pacing his room, “A month or two,” he told me. He got up off the bed and walked over to me turning me around “I know it feels long but it’s okay,” he assured me kissing my forehead “I’ll call you every second I have,” he said against my skin, “Isn’t it easier for you not to have a girlfriend?” I asked lifted my head up looking him in the eyes, they were the most honest part of him “maybe,” he admitted.
I swallowed hard nodding in agreement, “But I-" he sighed taking my face in his hands gently running his thumbs across my cheeks "I love you,” he whispered. He sighed in relief when he saw me smiling “so I’d rather have a hard time with you as my girlfriend than have it easy single okay,” he told me. “You love me?” I asked softly, he chuckled “Babe I’ve told you this before,” he said blushing slightly “I know but I thought maybe you just said it back because I said it first probably way too early-” he pressed his lips to mine to shut me up. “I love you. So much.” he mumbled against my mouth, he pulled back smiling before turning me around “What are-” “This is about you.” My heart began to pound. I stood there feeling desire run from my heart, to my chest, down to my inner thighs.
His fingers gently touched my neck and my hair as it was moved away sent chills down my spin. His hands went from the sides of my head and down to my neck, out to my shoulders and down to my hands. He grabbed my hands gently yet firm, put them in front of me and paused. I felt safe, he spoke no words. My heart is about to beat out of my chest and I close my eyes and take a deep breath out. He kisses my shoulder softly, and runs his lips on my skin towards my ear, but doesn’t quite make it that far. I tilt my head and after his deep breath out he kisses me gently. But it only makes me want more. He spins me around, and we are facing each other. He stares into my eyes and smiles. His two hands grab my left hand and he places my open palm on his heart, and he holds it there.
His eyes exude love, protection, security, safety, patience, and respect. I smile and he lets go of my hands, with one hand he runs his fingers through my hair and gently guides my face closer to his, eventually leaning me in to rest my head on his chest. His other arm wraps around me, I hope he never lets go. “Two months isn’t too long,” he mumbled into my hairline, “a few months apart here and there for a life time together,” I replied. While in that moment against his chest, I could only think about what I could do to make his heart pound. I turned so my lips were against his clothed chest, I stood on my tippy toes bringing my lips to his neck kissing softly, increasing pressure as I worked my way up his neck. He let out a soft groan tilting his head to the side and after I take a deep breath I bite him gently. Not enough to cause pain, only to make him want more.
I covered the spot with a kiss before moving on to the next part of his neck. I could tell by the hardening in his sweatpants it was working, “Oppa,” I whispered wrapping my arms around his neck “I want you,” I added before pressing my lips to his, my tongue fought his for dominance while my hands traveled to his chest starting to unbutton his shirt, his traveling under my shirt and up towards the back of my bra releasing the strap. He pulled his lips from mine to look at me “I want to watch,” he said softly before stepping back sitting down on his bed. I raised an eyebrow “Oh really?” I teased, but it didn’t work like it usually did “Yeah,” he said leaning back causing his button up to fall off his shoulders exposing his torso to me. I slowly reached down to the bottom of my shirt before pulling it over my head along with my bra, leaving my upper half exposed.
He took a deep breath “Come here,” he beckoned, I swayed my hips as I walked over to him straddling his lap as he requested. His hands went straight to my hips before running them along the small of my back and up, but his eyes were focused else where, my breasts pressed against his. He kissed the top of them before traveling my collar bone, neck until his lips met mine, stealing a hungry kiss from me. I arched into him grinding myself against his already hard boner, causing me to moan into his mouth. He took the advantage to shove his tongue in my mouth, he then moved us so I was laying back on the bed, with him between my legs. One of his hands moved down my sides towards my hipbone, the other traveled north towards my breast, his tongue never once letting up and I didn’t want him to.
He cupped my breast giving it a gentle squeeze, running his thumb across the nipple getting me to arch into him. His hand traveled down the waistband of my leggings into my underwear before gently inserting two fingers inside of me. I moaned at the feeling, and he moved his mouth to my neck, kissing, nibbling, sucking, as his fingers moved in and out of me. I ran my fingers through his hair before gripping his hair and pulling him up to kiss me, in a hungry passionate, sloppy kiss as I moved against his hand. He then pulled his hand away getting me to whimper, he pulled his lips from mine and shoved his fingers in his mouth tasting me, “I can’t wait much longer,” he admitted discarding his pants, he was bigger than I expected but I didn’t want to wait a second more.
I wiggled out of my own clothes as he slowly rolled a condom on himself before positioning between my legs “We don’t have to do this,” he said looking me in the eyes, and I knew it would kill him inside but he’d still stop if I asked, “I want you,” I assured him. He leaned down capturing my mouth with his as he eased himself into me, both of us moaning softly at the feeling. He gently rocked his hips, his hands teasing my skin as he kissed anything avalible to him “Fuck,” he muttered getting me to giggle, he lifted his head to look at me with a smile “Never thought I’d hear you swear,” I said breathless, “I’ve never felt so good jagi,” he replied bringing his lips to my neck kissing soft before nibbling my ear leaving me breathless “Fuck,” he moaned against my ear.
It wasn’t long before the two of us reached our peaks and the whole world seemed do come crashing down. He laid on top of me, his face nuzzled into my neck as he tried to control his breathing. I ran my fingers through his hair trying to catch my own breath “Fuck,” I muttered getting him to chuckle lifting his head up. He gazed a me lovingly “I love you Y/n,” he said before gently pulling himself out of me, I watched as he took car of himself, wondering how I ended up finding an actual prince. He pulled on a fresh pair of sweatpants before walking over to me with one of my favorite sweatshirts. “Sit up,” he said gently and I followed as directed, he slipped the shirt over my head before kissing my nose “Stay the night?” he asked.
“What about the others?” I whispered as he walked back over to his closet fetching a pair of boxers before handing them over to me, “You’re my girlfriend if I want you to sleep over then you sleep over,” he said “Sure because everything doesn’t have to go through Taeyong first,” I teased. He wrapped his arms around my waist before tackling me down on his bed “Taeyong can suck my dick,” he muttered into the sweatshirt, “I believe I reserve the right to suck your dick,” I said running my fingers through his hair, he smirked bringing his lips to my jaw kissing it softly “Don’t go getting any ideas,” I scolded getting him to chuckle, “the night is still young,” he said lifting his head up to look at me. Both of us forgetting what we were even talking about the moment our eyes met, his dark warm ones causing me to smile. I reached up and placed a hand on his cheek stroking it across his cheekbone.
“Why do you stick by me?” His voice small, almost as if he was afraid to ask me, “Kun-” “Really there’s better people out there for you. You deserve so much more than I can give you,” he told me quietly. I shook my head no, my thumb still petting my cheek, my other hand running through his hair “Because, you’re my reason to smile, the reason I actually want to wake up to this horrible world, the reason I don’t hide in a corner crying every second of the day,” I said getting him to smile slightly. I wrapped my legs around his back, my arms around his neck “I love you, you’re the brightest thing in my life and I don’t want you to think any different,” I told him sternly, he nodded “Got it,” he said before bringing his lips to mine for a quick kiss.
“KUN HYUNG!” he groaned dropping his head down to my chest getting me to giggle “I just wanted to cuddle,” he complained, “Kun hyung-oh hey Noona,” Chenle said shyly after already barging in “Can I help you Lele?” Kun asked annoyed, “LELE OH MY GOD THAT’S SO CUTE!” I squealed sitting up getting Kun to groan and move off of me. “They sent us dreamies home early because it was getting late so we didn’t get to eat…” he shook his head before turning to leave the room “I can cook something,” I offered getting out of bed, “Really?” he asked but he wasn’t asking me, he was asking Kun who was laying on the bed behind me. “Don’t look at him he doesn’t own me,” I said walking over to the younger boy trying to get him to look away from his elder brother.
“Thanks noona,” the boy muttered softly, Kun sighed loudly “She can’t cook for shit, so she’s offering my cooking skills,” he said wrapping his arms around me, “But Lele is so cute,” I whispered pointing at the boy. I walked out of his arms following after the young one only to be met by a bunch of hungry boys, “Don’t worry boys Y/n’s here to help,” I teased getting them to smile slightly but the cheering really went on when Kun walked into the room. He smiled the best fake smile he could before started taking thing out to start cooking “Can I help?” I asked, he turned to look at me placing his hands on my shoulders “I love you, I do but you can’t cook,” he said before moving me aside. I pouted “I wanna help,” I complained, he lifted me up and placed me on the counter next to the stove “just sit there and look pretty,” he said.
So that’s what I did, while sneaking bits of food, and telling him how handsome he was, and how good of a cook he was. Eventually all the boys were fed and Kun was now washing the dishes in the sink. I walked over to him wrapping my arms around his torso, “Maybe you deserve a reward,” I mumbled into his back “Of what?” he questioned. I kissed along his spine “I can think of a few things,” I whispered into the back of his neck. I pulled away before heading back to his room sitting onto his bed waiting for his arrival. He wasn’t long and he sighed shutting the door behind him “I wouldn’t have made anything for them if it wasn’t for you,” he said walking back over to the bed, “That’s a lie, you love them,” I said as he climbed into bed with me. “What do you want from me?” I asked running my fingers over his chest, he grabbed my upper arm and pulled me down to lay on top of him.
“All I want is to hold you,” he said running his fingers through my hair, “You’re soft,” I mumbled curling into his side, nuzzling my face into his neck. “Cuddling is very important in a healthy relationship- something most people overlook,” he said getting me to giggle, “Still soft,” I told him. My eyes fell closed as the steady beat of his heart calmed me, “Love… You always tease me about being soft…” I hummed letting him know I was listening “Do you ever wish I was more manly?” he asked. I furrowed my eyebrows lifted my head and looked him in the eyes, “What-” “Don’t make me explain,” he complained looking away from me.“There is no charm equal to tenderness of a heart,” I said placing my hand on his chest getting him to look at me “Nothing is so strong as gentleness,” I told him. I leaned down pressing my lips to his for a chaste kiss “Never change Quian Kun.”
“One of your hugs would be nice right now,” I mumbled into the phone, he sighed “Love you need sleep it’s like two in the morning there,” he told me. I shifted in bed holding the phone to my ear “It’s the only time I get to hear your voice, I’m not missing it,” I replied even though my eyes were shut and every part of me wanted to sleep. “I’ll be home soon,” he assured me, “yeah but that doesn’t mean I get to see you right away,” I whispered, he sighed “I’m sorry,” he told me softly. “NO, no don’t feel bad, I’m extremely proud of you and I’m happy for you,” I replied, I hated when he felt guilty but at the same time it reminded me that he cared. We sat on the phone in comfortable silence, listening to each other breathing, finding comfort within the familiar noise.
It’s incredible how alone one person’s absence can make you feel. I could be in a room surrounded by all my friends and family, but without I might as well be standing on the surface of the moon. “No matter how painful distance might be, not having you in my life would be worse,” I whispered, “It wouldn’t,” he replied getting me to furrow my eyebrows now suddenly awake “What?” I asked sitting up in my bed “Promise you’ll always remember me?” he says. I shook my head no “Don’t make me promise that,” I said feeling tears well in my eyes “People only ask you to remember them if they are planning to leave… If you’re planning to leave please don’t ask me to remember it,” I whispered as a tear rolled down my cheek.
“It’s not that I don’t love you Y/n, I do, but you deserve better than this,” he told me “That’s why I’m breaking up with you, it’s what’s best for you,” he added. “You don’t get to decide what’s best for me!” I snapped “I get to decide what’s best for me and that is you,” I said desperately. “I disagree, love shouldn’t hurt so much,” he told me, “Don’t do this,” I whispered lifting my shaking hand to my cheek trying to wipe away tears “I’m sorry it’s for the best you’ll see that eventually, I love you Y/n, take care of yourself,” he said before hanging up on me. “Kun no, no, no,” I said pulling my phone from my ear looking to see he did in fact hang up and every time I tried to call him back I was sent to voicemail.
I laid down on my bed letting my tears roll down my cheeks, my mom couldn’t get me out of bed for three days. The first day she did she had to drag me into the bathroom and force me to shower, then forced me to sit at the table eating what she called comfort food. “What’s the worst part?” she asks, gazing over at me, the rims of my eyes red, swollen, puffy, still full of tears “The worst part?” I croaked. “About heartbreak,” she says, “What’s the worst part about it?” I gave her a fake smile, exhaling out of my nose “other than the crippling feeling of the way your body aches with every step,” I start, “I think it’s knowing I’ll never be the same.” I shoved another huge bite into my mouth.
“I keep waiting for him to call me. In the middle of the night, crying, to tell me he’s sorry. That he made the greatest mistake of his life, but that’s the thing with Kun he thinks he’s doing the right thing so nothing is going to change his mind,” I said before tossing my spoon into the bowl, “Then change his mind,” my mother said, I furrowed my eyebrows and looked at her “You told me once that he doesn’t seem to listen to anyone but you. So make him listen to you,” she added. She smiled walking over to me wrapping her arms around my shoulders “I already bought the plane ticket,” she said before kissing the side of my head. She helped me pack while I was busy on the phone begging Yukhei to tell me which hotel they would be staying at. Luckily for me he’s a lot more of a softie than he likes to show and told me which hotel and what room was his.
The day just seemed to be dragging on as I drove to the airport, boarded a plane and flew to London listening to Without You (Chinese Version) the whole way there on repeat. I thought about practicing what I was going to say to him, but everything just sounded so desperate I knew it’d be better just to speak from my heart. When I arrived at the Airport I was surprised to see every single Dreamie waiting for me, I smiled at them “I’ve missed you boys,” I said pulling as many of them in a hug as I could, and they swallowed me up mumbling how much they missed me too. “You guys didn’t have to come get me,” I told them, “Don’t be silly,” Mark said as we walked out of the airport into a fancy car with blacked out windows.
“He’s been a wreck,” Renjun admitted to me, “I’ve never seen him so irritable, he’s like heartless,” Chenle added “It hurts,” I tell them, “It hurts so bad that it changes you,” I explained as much as I was glad to hear he was in as much pain as it, it broke my heart to know he was like that. We arrived to the hotel and they brought me to his door before heading to their own rooms, I took a deep breath before knocking on the door. It was only a minute before the door opened but it felt like an eternity. Looking at him made me want to take him into my arms, his eye rims were red as if he had just been crying, his nose red “W-why are you here?” he asked me softly “They say love is blind. I disagree.” I allowed myself into his room.
He shut the door sighing softly “Y/n-” “No I came all this way to say this, so you’re listening,” I said sternly, he nodded his head sitting down on the edge of my bed. “Infatuation is blind, love is all-seeing and accepting. Love is seeing all the flaws and blemishes and accepting them. Love is accepting the bad habits and mannerisms, and working around them. Love is recognizing all the fears and insecurities, and knowing your role is to comfort. Love is working through all the challenges and painful times. Infatuation is fragile and will shatter when life is not perfect.” I stood in front of him “Love is strong and it strengthens because it’s real,” I explained. I stood between his legs taking his face in my hands “What we have is real Kun, it’s real and it’s hard but it’s worth everything,” I told him.
“I can’t offer you what-” “I don’t need much,” I said kneeling between his legs looking up at him “Especially things I can do for myself. I don’t need someone to make my dreams come true, all I need is someone to rest gently, and wake up slowly with. With words set in stone, and a mind wide open. Show me what chivalry looks like, attention sounds like, and passion feels like. You’ve done that for me,” I said quietly, he shook his head but I continued “It’s not that my expectations are lowered, I just know what actually matters. You matter to me more than you know. I don’t want any of this- life- without you, and , honestly, outside of us, I don’t need much either.” and in that moment I could see he believed me.
He dipped his head and press his mouth to mine. We both inhale a deep breath the second our lips meet. I wrap my arms around his neck and pulls myself into his lap, and he welcomed me back. He rolled me over so I was laying back against the mattress and he was over me his hands on either side of my head. Our mouths are pressed desperately together but our lips are completely still and we’re both attempting to inhale another breath. As soon as my lips separate from his, he looks deeply into my eyes “I love you,” he whispered, I pull him back to me, I lift myself from the bed slightly, bringing my mouth back to his. This time I kiss him softly parting his lips with mine. When our tongues meet, he moans and pushes me back against the mattress, kissing me back. For the next few minutes we’re completely lost in what feels like sheer perfection.
He pulled away looking me right in the eyes “I didn’t fall in love with you because I was lonely or lost. I fell in love with you because after getting to know you, I realized that I wanted to make you a permanent part of my world,” he said brushing hair out of my face. “You have me,” I said softly, he collapses on top of me burying his face in my neck, he inhaled deeply “Promise you’ll marry me someday,” he mumbled against my skin, “Promise you’ll ask?” I replied getting him to smile against my neck. “I’ll ask,” he whispered, I ran my fingers through his hair “And I’ll say yes,” I said before turning to kiss the top of his head. “Don’t go breaking my heart Quian Kun,” I told him, he kissed the side of my face “I couldn’t if I tried,” he said before looking up at me “you literally didn’t allow me to break up with you,” he teased, “Because you make rash dumb decisions,” I replied pressing a kiss to his lips.
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