Machine at Midnight

My silly little tumber bog where I post mostly HDG dirtposts/shitposts/parodies The high-effort video shitposts are tagged #certified MaM banger

[machineatmidnight]

FUCK YOU AFFINI COMPACT!!!!

hdg parody of Big Bill Hell's Cars, my best dirtpost to date

[machineatmidnight]

the domestication situation is crazy

[machineatmidnight]

FUCK YOU AFFINI COMPACT!!!!

hdg parody of Big Bill Hell's Cars, my best dirtpost to date

[machineatmidnight]

canon facts about big blitum:

Full name is Blitum Alitis, 6th bloom (alitis means like asshole in greek lmao)

constantly lies about bloom count to seem more trustworthy

he learned about terran masculinity and misogyny from like tv and movies and weird dudebros, so he just thinks its some cool aesthetic and has no idea of the real harm it caused/malice behind it (he would be disgusted to find out)

he has a floret who acts like a '50s housewife, but she's trans and HARD into it, and honestly blitum doesn't fully know the full dynamics of trans misogyny kink he just thinks its fun and clearly she likes it

he acts aggressive and douchey but yknow he is an affini so he is good intentioned at heart, he just has fun with it

people have mentioned like wanting/writing blitum crackfics, i fully endorse this that would be awesome

[machineatmidnight]

someone on Discord suggested Ryan Gosling play Big Blitum

i am floored

[machineatmidnight]

made this a while ago im allowed to post it here fuck you

[machineatmidnight]

floretcore? i thought it was the affini that had cores

[machineatmidnight]

discussion of HDG fics be like

Have you seen the new fic? It's HDG. It's literally called SISFS. It's NGNM. It's literally ODOM. You can probably find SLC. Dude it's TTLG. It's TFITM. It's UHBFG9DO9BDF9H. You can read UHBFG9DO9BDF9H. You can go to AO3 and read UHBFG9DO9BDF9H. Log onto AO3 right now. Go to UHBFG9DO9BDF9H. Dive into UHBFG9DO9BDF9H. You can UHBFG9DO9BDF9H it. It's UHBFG9DO9BDF9H. UHBFG9DO9BDF9H has it for you. UHBFG9DO9BDF9H has it for you.

[machineatmidnight]

there are two types of HDG titles: a single word panic at the disco title

examples are numerous and need not be provided

[machineatmidnight]

discussion of HDG fics be like

Have you seen the new fic? It's HDG. It's literally called SISFS. It's NGNM. It's literally ODOM. You can probably find SLC. Dude it's TTLG. It's TFITM. It's UHBFG9DO9BDF9H. You can read UHBFG9DO9BDF9H. You can go to AO3 and read UHBFG9DO9BDF9H. Log onto AO3 right now. Go to UHBFG9DO9BDF9H. Dive into UHBFG9DO9BDF9H. You can UHBFG9DO9BDF9H it. It's UHBFG9DO9BDF9H. UHBFG9DO9BDF9H has it for you. UHBFG9DO9BDF9H has it for you.

[machineatmidnight]

the fucking fic that makes you little

hdg is cgl for sophonts who cant admit to themselves theyre into cgl

[glitchyrobo]

=)

[laya-snowfeather]

my ex gf was into hdg

she thought she wasn’t into cgl

i check her blog later

she’s into cgl

[machineatmidnight]

>into hdg but "not cgl" >looks inside >into cgl

[machineatmidnight]

the fucking fic that makes you little

hdg is cg/l for sophonts who cant admit to themselves theyre into cgl

[machineatmidnight]

I can't talk, I'm domesticating

credit @foxilittlezoe for the idea

[margo-mayhem]

[october-val]

100% Match

[machineatmidnight]

i found out class-A was based on weed WHILE HIGH THE FIRST TIME so that was an experience

[machineatmidnight]

I THINK GLITCHYROBO WOULD KNOW A LITTLE BIT MORE ABOUT HDG THAN YOU DO PAL BECAUSE SHE INVENTED IT! AND THEN PERFECTED IT SO THAT NO WOMAN COULD BEAT HER IN THE RING OF KINK!

[machineatmidnight]

shrimp-like xenosophont that gets domesticated by an affini made of terran rice plants

call that shrimp getting fried by rice

[october-val]

*Accord anthem vinyl scratch sound*

> YOU’RE NOW LISTENING TO

*Jump drive thump sound*

> 255.7

*biorhythm sound*

> REAL FLORET FM

*dog clicker*

> WHERE WE PLAY NOTHIN BUT FLUFF FLUFF AND MORE FLUFF

*hypnotic snap sound*

*hab Ai chime*

> THIS AIN’T YOUR OLDBLOOM’S STATION

* Floret cut of Imagine Dragons - Radiofractal starts playing *

[daffodilfool]

Visit Original Link

Visit Original Link

[october-val]

*Accord anthem vinyl scratch sound*

> YOU’RE NOW LISTENING TO

*Jump drive thump sound*

> 255.7

*biorhythm sound*

> REAL FLORET FM

*dog clicker*

> WHERE WE PLAY NOTHIN BUT FLUFF FLUFF AND MORE FLUFF

*hypnotic snap sound*

*hab Ai chime*

> THIS AIN’T YOUR OLDBLOOM’S STATION

* Floret cut of Imagine Dragons - Radiofractal starts playing *