Delighting in the Cringe -

- of being 32 on Tumblr

[mags-grandiflora]

I've bargained with my god: if graham cracka, turnip head, and mctortoise go together within a week, I will never drink alcohol again. Come on, give my sobriety a cool story behind it, please!

[mags-grandiflora]

Getting ready to talk to my European Friends like

[mags-grandiflora]

Tumblr isn't letting me upload the mcconnell/graham meme. Whatcha suppressing, @staff

[mags-grandiflora]

The Crabs got Graham!

[mags-grandiflora]

Tumblr is actually the only website where self-censorship is valid. You type one word and you get 6 months of nrop blogs.

[mags-grandiflora]

Nobody actually wants a Marauders spin off because 99.99998% of Marauders exists in shiplandia and canon would get in the way.

[paperdrevms]

love how the xiao clan is so fond of shen lanzhou

(vol 5 spoilers) you have xiao fangxu giving him his milk portions, talking how lanzhou reminds him of his late wife and praises him for the winter coats

lu yizhi gifts him golden and jade bracelets the first time they met and considers him a good match for xiao chiye. AND THE HORSE SHE SAVED UP FOR HIM

xiao xun loves him smmmmm like wdym he insists on holding lanzhou's hand, that little guy is so fond of his uncle

theres meng who only ever lands on xiao chiye and is especially gentle when he lands on lanzhou

(vol 6 spoilers) wdym snowcrest leaves his master behind and listens to lanzhou instead

xiao jiming is his sugar baby

shen lanzhou, you're so loved and i couldn't be happier for you

[mags-grandiflora]

FUCK your restaurant

if I can't order food online without downloading an app, I'm not ordering. Go fuck yourself. If I can't order without giving you access to my location. If I can't order without signing up.

I'm saving so much money with the fuck you mentality.

[darkfoggyforests]

zhuzhi lang my shaylaaaaa

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Give that thang a Cinderella Moment!

[mags-grandiflora]

I love businesses that have Georgia O'Keefe paintings in the women's bathroom. I need to get some for my bathroom. And my boudoir. And honestly just in general everywhere. Flowers that look like vulvas are peak art, I love it.

[renshengs]

thousand year divorce goes crazy

[mags-grandiflora]

You can't make this shit up

I have a dragon applique sewn onto tulle. To get it free, I had to use a wood burning pen (900°f) and trace it out. And I did not behave myself and wear PPE. I didn't even put my hair up. I should have been wearing goggles, heat resistant gloves, and a respirator (burning plastic).

Right as I finished, my friend L called me.

L. The 20 year OSHA inspector.

He knew 😭🤣

[mags-grandiflora]

Do I want to try painting mountains on my beizi and risk fucking it up, or not paint them and risk it not looking as cool? Decisions decisions.

[le-mori]

Qi Zhuyin for anon request

[mags-grandiflora]

QI ZHUYIN SUPREMACY! My wife. I love her so.

[mags-grandiflora]

Me, six months ago: this process was a disaster, I'm never using Superbuy again.

One cosplay later: Ni Howdy Y'all xiexie for your help please don't charge me $80 for shipping again.

Qi Zhuyin supremacy demands sacrifices.

[mags-grandiflora]

Imagine an entire country is cheering for your death after a heart attack. Your wife was on vacation during the heart attack, and stayed on vacation for a month. She finally comes home, and her statement to the press is that you literally weren't worth cancelling her trip for 😭😆🦀