Fuck Off Oil (Banishing Oil)
Sometimes, just saying “fuck off” doesn’t quite do the trick. Whether it’s unsatisfying or doesn’t repel the asshole you’re trying to get rid of, it might be time to pull out the big guns.
This banishing oil is a revamped version of an oil I made for an old friend many years ago. The original purpose was to rid her home of a nasty invasive spirit and then keep it away, since it had already been banished and returned a few times. She used it to anoint her mirrors, windows, doors, and even herself, followed by a large black pillar candle coated in more of the oil and burned every day until it was just a lump of wax.
It worked perfectly for her purposes, so I have taken that old recipe and recreated it in my current style for my current needs. If you saw my earlier rant post, then you know what this is for. If not, that’s okay - just know that someone has tested my patience and taken advantage of my kindness, and now they should kindly fuck off forever.
Like most of my spells and spell ingredients, this oil is 100% edible… and pretty tasty! See my notes below for ideas on how to use it.
Oil of Your Choice (I used olive oil because it’s what was in my cabinet)
Measure how much oil you will need to fill your jar or bottle of choice. You can pour the oil into a bowl or use a measuring cup to both measure and mix your oil, which is what I did. Fewer dishes to wash at the end!
Add each of your ingredients, one at a time, to the oil. Leave the bay leaf for last, and see step 3. I added the ingredients in the order that they are listed, but you can do them in whatever order suits you best. Be sure to give each a purpose tied back to the person, spirit, or other bothersome creature you are banishing (some ingredients have protective properties; see my note below for how I assigned a purpose to each).
Stir your mixture well. Really whip it. Beat the hell out of it. Etc.
Bay leaves are often used in wish magic or as vehicles for sigils. For our purposes, hold the leaf with both hands and stare at it hard. Think of the person, spirit, or thing you are banishing. Whisper or shout your desire to keep them away from you, adding any specifics you like. Stuff the leaf into your jar or bottle whole.
Pour your mixture into the jar or bottle over the bay leaf. Be sure to get all of the bits of garlic in there.
Cap the jar or bottle and give it a good shake. I recommend letting it sit and infuse for a few days to get a really good flavor going, but you can use it immediately if you want. Just be sure to shake it well to charge it before use.
This oil is good for up to six months, though it may last longer. Keep an eye on it; if it forms mold, throw it away immediately. Keep your jar or bottle in a cool, dark space. Refrigeration is optional, but it’ll last longer if you keep it in the fridge.
As with most oils, there are many uses for this recipe. It can be either a spell on its own, or you can create it to be a component in another spell. Or both! Both is good.
I like to use this to cook vegetables like brussels sprouts, asparagus, and potatoes, but you could also use it in a stir fry or to cook meats. This oil also makes for a very pleasant salad dressing when mixed with red wine vinegar or apple cider vinegar. It would be both funny and effective to feed a Fuck Off Salad to your target. If you want to do this, I recommend making it extra spicy, especially if they hate spice and you’re feeling especially vindictive.
If you’re not looking to eat this oil in some way, you can also use it to anoint candles for a banishing spell. Or, if you want to get a little more involved, you can submerge a taglock or poppet in the oil to symbolize the person you are repelling. This would be a great way to continuously banish someone or something if they keep trying to return. Plus, it can have the added benefit of being… uncomfortable for the target.
Here are the purposes I assigned to each ingredient; feel free to use these or come up with your own based off your own experiences:
Salt - Protect the caster during the creation and use of the oil, repel bad vibes and start the process of cleansing
Pepper - First line of fuck off; give a reason or a particular attribute that you want gone, such as “aggression” and “lying”
Chili flakes - Second line of fuck off, this time with ✨spice✨; I assigned “threats” and “rancid vibes” to this ingredient
Garlic - Third line of fuck off; protection against further nonsense, repelling them from contacting me
Onion - Keeping away pests; I use the layers of the onion to symbolize the layers of “fuck off” in the oil and reinforce each one
Oregano - Now comes the part where we protect ourselves from the offending party’s possible retaliation! This is protection from backlash and luck for the success of the spell. This has extra power for me, since my mom grew this oregano and is superbly pissed about someone threatening her kids!
Caraway seeds - Boosting my convictions and inner power, preventing the spell from backfiring on me (the target(s) are also witches, so this was very important to include!)
Coriander - Personal protection against further nonsense, cementing this oil as a line of self-defense
If you use this oil in a spell, let me know how you liked it, if you made any substitutions, and/or how it worked for you!
Happy Banishing, Witches!
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