āI love you.ā
Itās one of the most sought after phrases in the world. The things people will do to hear someone say, āI love you,ā have surprised us in countless stories, movies, and songs. The things people will do for someone who loves them are equally as astounding.
Why do we love hearing, āI love youā so much? Maybe its the promise of holding a place in someones heart, or the awakening knowledge of a new significance you hold in someones life. Often its the phrase expressed before a relationship takes its next step, the expression that one is loved for all their silly quirks, for their looks, for their heart, or for who they are (the good, the bad, and the imperfection). People thrive off that idea, that they are enough, that they are someoneās everything.
We love to be loved.
I believe in love. I believe in its strength and significance in relationships. But I have also learned, that love isnāt always enough. You need more than love to make a relationship work. Love starts many great romances, but love alone wonāt make a relationship last forever.
There are six phrases that I think are as important, and possibly more important than, āI love you.ā Phrases that I think we should all desire to hear from those we want to be close too. Phrases that should be as important to us as a declaration of love.
6 Phrases More Important than, āI Love Youā
1. āI forgive you.ā
I forgive you for all the things have done, or will do, that may hurt me. I forgive the way you may lash out when you are hungry, I forgive the things you may say, when youāre tired after a long day. I forgive the times you didnāt even know you upset me. I forgive your big mistakes and the small ones. I forgive you for not knowing what I needed, when I thought you would, or even expected you to know. I forgive you when you fall short, because I see how hard you are trying. I forgive you the way I hope youāll forgive me, because I know neither of us our perfect.
2. āIāll sacrifice for you.ā
Iāll sacrifice my time for you. Iāll be selfless for you. Iāll stay up late with you as you learn to care for our new baby, even though I have work in the morning. Iāll hold you when your sick. When you are weak, I will be your strength. Iāll be there for you at 3am as readily as I would at 7pm. Iāll be there when no one else is, and Iāll be there 100%. In sickness and in health, my willingness to be there wonāt change. My sacrifice is not dependent on your state of being, but rather it is there because you exist and you are someone worth sacrificing for.
3. āI respect you.ā
I respect you for who you are, and not for what I feel you deserve. I respect you because you deserve my respect, not because you earned it. Iāll respect your opinions, and consider your feelings. Iāll treat you like a person with your own thoughts, hopes, dreams, and desires. And, those thoughts, hopes, dreams, and desires will matter to me the way they matter to you.
4. āIāll support you.ā
Iāll support your hopes and your dreams. I will always have your back. You can rely on me. Iāll raise you up, and never tear you down. Iāll always make sure you have what you need, physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. Iāll lift you back up when you fall.
5. āIāll protect you.ā
Iāll protect you from harm. Iāll protect your heart from pain. Iāll protect the idea of us. I wonāt demean you. Iāll treasure you and shield you from that evil, bad, and ugly. I wonāt let others put you down. You will be safe in my arms, safe in my hands, and safe in my heart. Iāll be your safe haven, your safety net, and someone you can always trust.
6. āIām committed to youā
I wonāt leave you. I will be here for you again and again. Iāll make, making this work a priority in my life. Iāll look back on our beginning, Iāll work on our now, and Iāll look forward to our future, because we are something that I want to last forever.
Some may argue that if you āloveā someone, all these things will be part of that love. That someone who loves you automatically sacrifices for you, respects you, forgives you, supports you, protects you, and is committed to you.
In an ideal, perfect world, I truly believe that all these attributes come together as one and are expressed through pure and unconditional charity. It is a trait we should all strive to develop. But from my experience, we are human, and we fall short of this perfectionā¦ even towards those we love.
If it was true that love was all we needed, love wouldnāt be so hard, and relationships wouldnāt fall apart so easy.
The truth is there are lot of people you can love, but very few relationships that you can make last forever. Thatās why a person is capable of loving someone more than life, but knowing deep inside that it would never work. That is why people are capable of walking away from those they love. That is why someone can give up a life full of love for a single moment of weak and selfish pleasure. That is why people lie, steal, and cheat, to, from, and on those they love.
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