
ellievsbear
Claire Keane
will byers stan first human second
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
tumblr dot com
No title available

pixel skylines

titsay

Janaina Medeiros

No title available

JBB: An Artblog!
No title available
almost home
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
$LAYYYTER

oozey mess

shark vs the universe

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
One Nice Bug Per Day
seen from Iraq
seen from United States

seen from Ecuador

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from Côte d’Ivoire
seen from United States
seen from Canada
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from United States
@makesyounormal
Not a good night, lockdown/iso got me I guess. I took it out on my friends. I’m sorry for that. I love everyone around me. I apologise for making anyone uncomfortable/worry. I’m fine now. I’m home from the hospital and I’m watching some cartoons and got some McDonald’s. Hospital said I’m welcome to come right back if I need to.
I’ve felt really un-masculine lately. So self conscious about my voice, not having any masculine mates. Been blaming it a lot on my dad not being there but idk if that’s the issue. I’ve always been fine with just having feminine mates in the past but I must admit I’ve been longing for a masculine friendship the past couple months. I’ve even thought about playing sports again which I hated through my younger years. I guess some masculinity in my life could be good for me?
Man; I like drugs. I don’t like drinking. Beers alright.
Dickhead Decision
Flooded with regrets as I made my way to the Black Lives Matter rally. We started off the night before with some mushrooms but it soon progressed into a few bags of coke we’d not long finished. My eyes feel like they’re going to fall out of my head as I wait for our stop. I feel terrible because to be completely honest I really don’t want to be there. I know I need to go, I know the sober version of me not being a dickhead would want to go and support, I know it’s the right thing to do.
We get off the train at Parliament and initially the cold air is a nice change, although this comfort is short lived as I realise the fucking huge escalators to follow. Like these things are ridiculous. I’m halfway up and I mean it when I say I thought I was just going topple backwards to my death. I made it out alive and am pleased to see the Myki gates are opened so I don’t need to make a fool of myself by misjudging the jump or something.
As soon as I’m through the gates I could tell it was a good turnout, we found our spot and got posted for the initial speeches. At this point I feel so disappointed in myself because all I can think about doing is sitting down. Every now and then I look over to see Georgia is going through the same pain. A constant cycle between losing my vision and losing my hearing with the urge to vomit present at all times.
I can see Geo is getting worse and she asks if we can go to the back of the crowd because she might pass out. I hope to god she wants to go somewhere private for a moment so we can both vomit and get on with this rally; I’m not so lucky. We regroup and move back to our spot in the midst of everything.
It’s time to march in protest down Bourke St, I almost forget how shitty I’m feeling because I’m flooded with all kinds of emotions. So beautiful to see such a turnout in support of such a cause but at the same time incredibly sad to think it has to be done. I feel proud to be there but also ashamed in a way being apart of such an oppressive race.
I’m glad I dragged my self to protest, I feel it’s sparked a new urgency to push for equality and justice for people of colour. We’ve got a long way to go.
Trip to/in Mount Martha - A Recount
A spontaneous trip to an AirBnB in Mount Martha. I think I put it all together as a surprise for Geo. We had an amazing little two story guest house with a great view of the ocean from the deck. I can’t remember if it was the first or second night we decided to take the acid we had brought along. Actually, it was the first night. We had our acid at 5:00 on the dot and started to come up hard right as the sun was setting.
As we lay back on our deck chairs we noticed as the sounds of dogs barking started to come in threes, trails of birds darting across the sky and the sun getting closer and closer to touching the water. Our two story suite started to seem smaller and smaller feeling like it was sinking lower than all the surrounding houses although this was a comfortable feeling. With the sun now what looked like an inch above the water Geo and I found ourselves lost in the trembling white circle, unable to look away. The longer we stared directly into the sun the more it started to go black with just a ring of white left around the outside. I started to wonder whether or not I should be staring right into the sun and Geo did too. For the life of us we both couldn’t figure it out. We kept on staring anyway for the whole duration of the sunset, probably about fifteen minutes. Probably longer, you know how time is sometimes.
We made our way inside and sat on the couch to enjoy the charm of actual T.V. with ads and a proper remote and stuff. I must say I did enjoy being told what to watch and when to watch it for the few days we were there. I think with got pretty lucky to have Evan Almighty playing because it was the perfect amount of stimulation and comedy. This must have grown old for Georgia kind of quickly because she decided it was time for a shower. It took me a few minutes to make my way down there myself once I was there, fuck it was amazing. Listening to Dire Straits and Black Flag. Everything seemed to be just falling into place at this point with a great streak of luck building up over the whole trip so it was no surprise that when we looked up we saw that the shower head was removable. I’m not sure how long we spent sitting down on the floor of that shower gawking over the crystal beads of water falling onto our faces, it could have been an hour. I really felt like I was in a warm waterfall with rocks and plants growing all around me.
Now usually when I’m tripping acid me and my little fella don’t get along so well. It always looks so dirty and shrivelled and look it probably is half the time, but this night when I got out of the shower I started to get hard. I’d never really been horny on acid before so to make the most of it I suggested Geo could give me some head. I would definitely recommend this if you can ever get your old mate to work on acid because it was amazing and led us straight upstairs onto the bed where we engaged in the longest, most passionate, intense sex I’ve probably ever had. Our place had one of those beds with walls and a ceiling made out of sheer curtains which paired with the incredibly thick, soft doona and pillows made it feel like we were in a cloud. I don’t think I’m going to try and explain this experience because I’m not articulate enough to o it justice but just trust me when I say it was good. As the sweat covered our bodies the need for a release became more and more apparent. It was starting to get hot so the next obvious step was to fuck out on the deck.
At this point I’m desperate to cum but the acid seems to be making me last forever and Geo is getting puffed. I cut my losses and give up on the idea; for a moment. After a few minutes of laying back on the chairs with Georgia I realise I’m not going to be able to think about anything else until I get the job done. I ask if it’s chill for me to wank it out so we can continue with the night and she’s fine with it. I’m jerking off on this deck chair out in the open with houses all around me, going at a pretty steady pace and Geo is sitting on the other chair next to me staring up at the stars. Five minutes goes by and I know that if I want to cum I need to really go for it, like, proper fast wanking, but I’m way to embarrassed to do that in front of Georgia because I know I would look like some sort of crazed orgasm junky having a fit or something. I keep trotting along until Georgia sings sweet music into my ears. She needs to go to the toilet, I know this is my chance. I watch as her head disappears down the staircase and I fucking go for it. I was going so hard the chair was skidding along the floor until finally after what could have been an hour, I get my release. I came all over myself, all over the chair, onto my face and even on the floor behind me. It was the biggest cumshot of my life and I felt like I had been drained of everything I had, in the best way possible of course. I just lay there, satisfied, until Geo gets back and I let her know it’s finally happened. She laughed and seems pretty amazed I could actually do it. I cleaned myself up and that was the end of that little saga.
The cold was becoming more apparent and on the couch with the doona was the obvious choice. As mentioned earlier we were really enjoying the experience of using the T.V. with the ads and everything but we had no idea we would stumble upon the long forgotten beauty that is Rage. I’m so grateful to have been reminded of Rage and cannot wait to have a working T.V. so I can watch it again. As the songs played the streak of good songs lengthened and lengthened, it was too good to be true. Each song seeming more perfect than the last, the perfect blend of our favourites, and songs we hadn’t heard before to become our new favourites. For the rest of the night our eyes were glued to the T.V. as the songs played.
Georgia was starting to get sleepy and moved to the bed. I struggle to get to bed on a normal night let alone after an acid fuelled episode. The night was definitely ending for Geo, but I was holding on for dear life. I noticed as the good changed from being one after the other to being almost non-existent, but I definitely didn’t admit this was happening at the time. Geo must have noticed this too and asked if I could turn off the T.V. to which I replied “But it’s all I’ve got left.” Finally the idiot host of Rage who I had admired all night (My opinion on them changed very quickly.) started to play their own music, I finally caved and turned off the T.V. My foot was cramping, it felt like I had a pulled hamstring and I was squirming all over the bed. I started to cry. And cry and cry. I remember switching back and forth between feeling really sad, and thinking I was being really cute and funny for being so sad. I definitely knew I was being funny when after laying back crying for a while I sat up and found out I’d been crying for so long that my ears had completely filled with water or tears or whatever you want to call it.
Now if you asked Geo how this night went I wouldn’t be surprised if it was slightly or even quite different, and it probably was quite different, you know how acid is. But this is how I remember it and I obviously find it interesting enough to write it out so you (whoever you are) can see. If anybody ends up reading this and you wanna check out all the songs that Rage played that night just hit me up. I have a playlist and it’s all in order of appearance.
“I’m feeling bored and empty. Let’s chat.”
“What’s good?”
You can read the rest.
Often I think back on times when I was really depressed and for some reason they now seem like such beautiful times. Does this just mean I’m getting more depressed?
Mum, Asha, Georgia. Please know that I love you all very much. More than anything in my whole life. I know this is selfish, I just couldn’t think of anything else to do. I think I’m the end I would have just ended up hurting everyone anyway. On a surface level I am a good person, but I think I am disgusting inside.
Georgia, I can’t finish this, I never want to leave you and I promised you I never would. So I won’t. Hopefully I feel better soon.
True Love (Feb2018)