REWARD FOR MISSING CRAYON
PRINCESS: I’M MISSING A CRAYON, CALL THE COPS!
DADDY: *pulls out cell phone*
DADDY: Operator, get me the police… Operator? OPERATOR!
DADDY: So, I guess they don’t have operators anymore.
PRINCESS: AND THE SWAT! I NEED MY BLUE CRAYON!
PRINCESS: *stomps foot and grabs her owl stuffie, Theodore*
PRINCESS: Theodore! Assemble the squad! I need my best men on this mission.
PRINCESS: *squints eyes and gets dramatic *
PRINCESS: It must be handled… Peanut style….
PRINCESS: *arranges her stuffies in a circle around herself and makes them hold hands, sits in the middle of them crisscross applesauce, closes her eyes and hums*
PRINCESS: THE OFFERING PLEASE!
PRINCESS: *eyes still closed, holds her hands out and waits for Theodore to put a blank coloring page in her hand*
DADDY: *places a blank page in her hand and then starts looking for the crayon*
PRINCESS: It seems we have done something to anger the color gods! Today we come together to redeem ourselves!
PRINCESS: *makes the crowd cheer*
PRINCESS: Today we will bring our people back to the great colorerers we’ve ever been!
DADDY: *still looking around for the crayon*
PRINCESS: Today we give the god of crayons A PICTURE! It’s time!
PRINCESS: *closes eyes and tears picture in half and waits, opens eyes a minute later*
DADDY: *Can’t find the crayon*
PRINCESS: *looks up at Daddy, confused*
PRINCESS: It didn’t just poof back?
DADDY: Maybe it just takes a little while to kick in.
PRINCESS: *huffs in frustration and turns to her owl stuffie*
PRINCESS: No, someone just gave me the wrong page! Doctors, think they know everything.
DADDY: Honest mistake… I think maybe we’re just gonna just have to do this the old fashioned way…
DADDY: *puts on a pair of sunglasses*
DADDY: I’m detective Jack Danger, I heard there’s been a possible crayon larceny. We take this kind of thing seriously downtown. I’d like to ask you a few questions.
PRINCESS: *smiles and giggles*
DADDY: Please try not to giggle ma'am, this is a very serious matter.
DADDY: *begins pacing the floor in front of her*
DADDY: Now, where were you on the night in question?
PRINCESS: *trying not to smile*
PRINCESS: Yes, sorry, errm… Last night?
DADDY: Yes ma'am. When did you last see the crayon?
PRINCESS: I was coloring in bed.
DADDY: *stops pacing and stands in front of her with his hand on his chin*
DADDY: Mmhmm mmhmm… And you were coloring with this crayon, I presume?
DADDY: *leans in close to her face*
DADDY: A likely story. If that was true, you’ d know what shade of blue it was.
DADDY: *pulls sunglasses down slightly and looks her in the eyes*
PRINCESS: Uhhmmm… Uhhhmmm… Light?
DADDY: Alright, your story checks out. I’ll run the evidence by the boys in the lab. Don’t worry, ma'am, we’ll find your crayon.
DADDY: *tackles her and covers her in kisses*