[malumagines-blog]

Teen Wolf but every time the storyline doesn’t make sense it gets faster

[vodkablossoms-blog]

[calumthms]

[irlpupi]

Are we not gonna talk about calum’s biceps

[whyistomholland-deactivated2018]

No

[jetblackheartaesthetic-blog]

I want invisible to be performed on tour and I want my baby to go center stage with a spotlight and I want everyone to shut the fuck up and appreciate him and let him sing his lil heart out 

[malumpleasee]

His eyes are brown. - Calum

His eyes are brown.

 Just like your coffee. It always reminded you of his eyes. The shade of the brown liquid always matching his. You couldn’t deny it, you hated coffee before him, but you fell in love with it when you compared the two. The swirls of the lighter shades of brown when you moved your spoon in circular motions swimming around the mug made you feel butterflies in your stomach. You sipped it slowly, accepting the bitter taste of the liquid. You got used to it quickly. You felt addicted to it almost. You hated adding anything else to the coffee. You didn’t want to wash away the darkness that matched his eyes so well, but he broke your heart. You couldn’t look at the mug of coffee the same. So you poured the cream, hoping to wash away the memories, and his eyes. 

 His skin is brown 

 Just like your coffee. The cream washing the black away. It was almost like a cinnamon color, just like his skin. The way it resembled him was unreal. The light brown matching perfectly with him. You hated the way it created little waves when you picked it up, or when you sipped it, the cream empowering the bitter taste. You stared at it, wanting to touch it, to see if it felt like him, but that was stupid, it was just coffee. You laughed to yourself, you felt like you couldn’t get rid of him. 

 Yeah, you should stick with tea from now on.

[weavingshaw]

reasons why luke would be the best daddy ever:

-”bub, you’re the luckiest kid in the world–you’re gonna have mark hoppus for a godfather” -he’d probably use the band snapchat a lot more often because he’d want to put all of the cute filters on your baby -”c’mon babe, i dont need instructions, i know how to build a crib” -”jk please give them back im struggling” -wrapping your newborn up in his sike sweatshirt because he couldn’t find any baby blankets -shaving (for once) and rubbing his chin, telling your baby “there bub, now its as soft as your bottom” -doing that lil nose scrunch thing to make your child laugh -buying a stuffed penguin for your kid and nodding solemnly “pengy jr. welcome to the family” -looking at your baby with a serious expression and telling them “you know, you’re cutting into my blowjob time” “luKE” -stumbling into the baby’s room when they’re crying at two in the morning and mumbling “you’d better become a singer with lungs like those” -when your child swears for the first time, luke straightens up and yells “michael!” -”its been six months and twenty-seven days since we’ve last had sex–just letting you know” -trying to introduce your kid to baby food, and when they scowl and push the bowl away, luke just murmurs longingly “i know, i miss mummy’s boobs too” -lifting the baby into the air and whispering “simbaaaaaa” -there have definitely been instances where he’s nearly dropped your child -buying matching striped shirts  -laughing when your kid’s first word ends up being “jeepies” -”when you’re older, uncle cal is gonna tell you a lot of embarrassing stories about me. i just want you to know that they’re all fake and that he’s a dirty rotten liar” -coming home and finding luke and the baby curled up in your bed, this tiny little human surrounded by a massive giant :’) -getting emotional on your child’s first day of school, looking at you sternly and saying “don’t you dare tell the boys about this”

ashton  michael  calum

[weavingshaw]

reasons why ashton would be the best daddy ever:

-”babe….do you think there’s vegemite-flavored baby food? if there is we’re totally buying it” -probably spamming the snapchat story with hundreds of photos of his kid -getting emotional when he sees your baby wrap their little hand around his finger for the first time -”michael put your guitar away, they’re gonna play the drums when they’re older–no michael i swear to god–” -making matching morning smoothies for him and your child, clinking the glasses together and saying “drink up bub, got a big day ahead of us” -he’s definitely one of those super affectionate dads–he’d constantly be holding your baby and pressing sloppy kisses to their chubby cheeks with really exaggerated sounds -”who’s the cutest baby in the whole wide–no, those are daddy’s glasses bub, no dont–ow!” -changing the baby’s diaper for the first time and “oh god, what in the everloving fuck is that?” -sneaking up behind you when you’re trying to breastfeed and pressing a seductive kiss to your neck, only to back away quickly because “i can’t sex you up with our kid staring right at me” -he’s definitely the type to push your child in the baby swings at the park and dramatically pretend that they’ve kicked him every time they surge forward, just to make the baby laugh -”wow you like to pull on daddy’s hair too huh? guess you inherited that from mummy” “asHTON” -buying your kid a mini-fedora because “nice guys dont finish last bub, look how lucky i got with your mummy” -”babe…no babe, check the sugar content” “ashton i swear to god–” -drumming softly on the baby’s squishy stomach and giggling whenever your child lets out a happy squeal -picking calum to be the godfather and when luke and michael start to complain and ask why, ashton just replies with “because calum’s never dropped his kid before!” -”okay bub, im gonna share some information that’s gonna take you super far in life….tadpoles are not baby turtles”

michael  calum luke

[weavingshaw]

reasons why calum would be the best daddy ever:

-looking at the baby bundled up in his arms before glancing at you and whispering in an awestruck voice “we made this” -emailing drop dead to ask them if their clothing comes in children’s sizes -accidentally drinking the baby formula because he thought it was a protein shake -taking your child to the dog shelter every weekend because “babe, if we’re gonna get one this is good practice” -letting your child colour in his tattoos whilst he’s just sitting and giggling slightly because “what? it tickles” -walking in on you breastfeeding and pouting because he claims that “its not fair, i never get boob time anymore :-(” -poking the baby’s cheeks and laughing at how your child is so squishy, yet he rolls his eyes whenever you do the same thing to him -”babe, look, look, a green day onesie!” -the baby would probably fall asleep on his chest and calum would just rub soothing circles into their back until he followed suit -”no, trust me, the guitar is overrated, don’t pay attention to uncle luke. bass is way better bub, i swear. no listen–” -dressing your child up as a puppy for their first halloween -dropping the baby bottle and going “fuck–no wait i’m not allowed to swear anymore, shit–no, fuck i meant–” -teaching your child how to play soccer and letting them score on him all the time -”your mummy is so pretty, isn’t she bub?” “you’re still not getting laid tonight” -”aunt mali’s gonna take you out for ice cream, okay? that way me and mummy can have some alone time” -insisting that his kid is way better than uncle michael’s kid -”for fuck’s sake ashton, yes my child is getting all the nutrition they need, thank you very much”

michael  ashton  luke

[weavingshaw]

reasons why michael would be the best daddy ever:

-once they reached a suitable age, he’d let your kid draw all over themselves with colourful markers in an attempt to replicate his tattoos because “babe! they’re non-toxic and washable!” -buying a mini leather jacket and boasting about how your kid was going to be the “coolest punk rocker on the block” -the first time the baby throws up on him, he’d probably yell out a surprised “what the fuCK” before realizing that he just swore in front of your child -”dont tell mummy about this, okay?” -buying your kid a guitar for their first birthday, even though “michael, they won’t be able to play it” “yeah but that doesnt mean i cant expose them to the life and tools of a musician” -pretending to steal the baby’s nose, only to panic and cringe when your child starts to cry “no no no im sorry bub, please dont cry–look! i gave it back, everything’s fine, please stop crying” -”this is just between you & me, okay? lets not tell mummy.” -when you’re out shopping and the baby’s crying because they’re hungry, michael’s there scooping your newborn into his arms and sobbing with them because “i know bub, i wish i had boobs too” -always complaining about how your kid seems to prefer uncle luke over their own father -trying to fit in a quickie whilst you’re in the middle of doing laundry and the dinosaur chicken nuggets in the oven are about to burn -”okay so this is called a secret. that means we dont tell anybody, including mummy” -colouring with your kid for ten minutes every day because “babe, some smart people said it helps relieve stress…you should try it, you look like you need it” -”jk you dont need it, you’re beautiful, now please put my guitar down” -fucking up every once in a while and saying “im sorry, im sorry, please dont break up with me” -reassuring you time and time again after your pregnancy that “no, your stretch marks dont change anything, your pudge doesnt change anything, you’re still my sexy wife and i want to make love to you right now” -crying a lil bit when your child calls him “dadda” for the first time -”shut the fuck up Calum, so what if i cried, im still more punk-rock than you’ll ever be”

for @felicityash and @calgasms pregnancy/daddy!5sos blurb night!

calum ashton luke

[jjkxone]

[hovseofcards]

SLFL: Tinley Park - July 30, 2016

[potterscar]

butterfly filter sos

[obrienxposeyx]

“He’ll Be Fine” 😂 *not my vid*

[hovseofcards]

SLFL: Tinley Park - July 30, 2016

[calums5os-deactivated20180510]

calum being gorgeous as hell - @5sos​

[malumagines-blog]

My Dad: You okay?

Me: I'm fine.

What I really mean: When will my time come where I get to meet the adorable kitten that is Michael Clifford? I have been waiting for years now and it still has not come. My patience is wearing thin and this boy is becoming more and more attractive by the second. I am purely disgusted with my horrible fate of not achieving my goal of taking a sweet picture with Michael.