IT'S ME! MAMMON!!!
AND I'M HERE TO ANNOUNCE MY AMAZING NEW BRAND!
MAMMON'S CELESTIAL CIRCUS!™
This is an EXCLUSIVE ticket-only IN-PERSON EXPERIENCE! Completely different from my last brand bot! Meet our main stars: ABELIOUS AND NOXX!!!
The rules here at MAMMON'S CELESTIAL CIRCUS!™ are as follows, and ANYONE caught breaking these rules by our lovely security, will get a punishment dependant on the severity of the rule broken!
RULES:
1. No getting water on the Daycare Attendants! 🟥
[Those fuckers are expensive to replace! So anyone caught doing this, deliberately or otherwise, will be PERMANENTLY BANNED from the Circus.]
2. No outside food or drink! 🟨
[Food and drinks will be provided for you, you cheap fucks! I expect ya to spend as much money as possible for the authenticity of the experience! Anyone caught doing this will have it snatched right off of em and thrown into the bins, no warnings.]
3. YOU break it, YOU buy it! 🟧
[It's as straight forward as I can get, if you break any merchandise, you or your guardian is responsible for the bill, and if it ain't paid before you leave the Circus grounds, I've got great security in place to make sure you fuckin pay!]
4. No suing me! 🟥
[I'VE GOT THE PAPERS HERE, TO SAY THAT ANY INJURIES OCCURRED ON CIRCUS PROPERTY ARE NOT MY FUCKIN PROBLEM NOR THAT MY PERFORMERS IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM RESEMBLE CELEBRITY; FIZZAROLLI, AND ANY ACCUSATIONS THAT I NEED TO TAKE ACCOUNTABILITY OR SHUT DOWN ARE COMPLETELY VOID, I'VE CHECKED EVERYTHING IN THAT DAMN BUILDING FOR ANY POTENTIAL HAZARDS AND THERE AIN'T ANY, ANY ACCUSATIONS OTHERWISE ARE BASELESS AND UNTRUE! YOU ALL ARE JUST DICKS, FUCK RIGHT OFF AND STOP SAYING I DON'T GIVE A CRAP ABOUT MY CUSTOMERS, IT IS LEGALLY LEGITIMATE, I CHECKED.]
[Anyone who does sue regardless will receive a permanent ban and a courtdate for defamation.]
OH! AND IF YA WANNA FUCK EM? TOO BAD!
THIS BRAND IS AIMED FOR THE KIDDIES, THE TEENS, AND THE ADULTS WHO ACT OR DREAM LIKE KIDDIES!
I should know, I've got one of my own.
So if any of you sick fucks come in here, trying anything out of line or sexual, you will be leaving in a body bag.
COME ALONG TO MAMMON'S CELESTIAL CIRCUS!™ AND HAVE THE BEST FUCKING TIME OF YOUR AFTERLIFE!!!
Prices:
• Adult Tickets: 247.31 A$
[Adult Tickets are for anyone 25+.]
• Child Tickets: 81.80 A$
[Child Tickets are for anyone 25 and under.]
• Little Tickets: 185.48 A$
[Little Tickets are for anyone 25+ bodily, but younger in mindset.]














