please pay my tuition

My name is Carlos and your life was Bullshit until right now

[mangosmoother]

Im getting off tumblr for good so follow my links if u wanna keep up with me

[niebieskafanta]

[spartanlocke]

[bryko-deactivated20170127]

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[metangy]

[watevertheheck]

[foodnetworkruinedmylife]

Chopped drinking game

1 drink if:

- three males and one female 

- someone says something along the lines of “I’m too good for this ingredient" 

- someone garnishes with citrus

- someone fries an ingredient for a garnish 

- multiple chefs make the same type of dish

- only one person knows how to correctly prepare the ingredient

- someone forgets a basket ingredient until the last minute

- someone leaves off a basket ingredient

- an italian pronounces everything in a thick accent

- salad in the appetizer round

- ice cream in the dessert round

- someone panics over their baked dessert not cooking

- someone attempts to make a risotto

- someone talks about chopping something up and then cuts themself

- a competitor “has overcome a lot of obstacles and is not going to let this one take them down”

- “get it on the plate”

- sriracha

- “I’m looking down at my dish and I’m feeling good”

- a judge asks someone if they tasted their dish and they didn’t

2 drinks if:

- alex and scott are sitting next to each other

- a dessert isnt sweet enough for amanda

3 drinks if:

- scott conant’s chest hair is showing

- ted allen says “be well”

- someone describes food as “sexy” (+1 if it’s scott conant)

finish your drink if:

- that one asshole that you were rooting against wins

[badfoodnetworkpuns]

How to die during a single episode of chopped

[rayliottaarchive-deactivated202]

[weloveshortvideos]

[monzenbashi]

i love z-moves

[magicalminimallow]

[flandelle-deactivated20180712]

Oh god please unmute 🐶😂

[bax16]

Good heavens

[shakeninsane]

whoever decides all the sound effects needs about a million awards

[placeholderurlimgone]

me as a superhero

bad guy: its so cute how u think u can stop me me: [blushes] r-really..?

[zany-the-nerd]

Child: What’s a VHS?

Me:

[animentality]

i  have honest to god never seen a santa clause reaction gif in my entire life

[poetic]

[weloveshortvideos]

When you’re tryna get to the R&B room but have to go through some weird room first

[rsbenedict-deactivated20181216]

the other Mike Pence

So there’s a guy on Twitter who is named Mike Pence but is not the soon-to-be Vice President garbage monster. Here’s his bio:

He’s amazing. Here’s a recent tweet he posted: