Between Common Dews

Currently I'm drowning between the two Komandoos. Oh and plus this is where I think outloud. 

[manicson]

No ones friend.

I cant understand how a person can be so friendly when ever the conversation is just between the both of us, then for no apparent reason whenever there is a third person or the crowds gets bigger they turn the most arrogant bullying competitive prick. This again happened to me tonight. Jia, lets call him that. I thought he was a very close friend of mine. he treated me very bad, for no apparent reason. I don’t think its even worth wasting my breath on this ass whole. I mean how bad it could be.

[manicson]

Complaints

I don’t know what is going on with me now days. I am always sleepy, always drifting off, can’t focus on the deadlines at work. Even though I have got one of the highest paying jobs for a fresh graduate, I can’t bring myself to enjoy the fact and actually be happy for myself. My mind is constantly pondering on how I am missing this one thing. 24/7 half of my mental existence is running around the town looking for it, filing complaints against the cosmos for making me the saddest person alive. Yes, Serenity is what I need. You might say serenity has become the “missing link” in my theory (of life), the “Holy Grail” in my “ethos”. It seems in my mind if I find this thing called serenity I will achieve the ultimate happiness. You might have heard me say this once or twice before, the Arabic word “Uns” means the psychological support loving spouses give each other. 

Urrg this is so boring i have gotta go sleep. Btw tomorrow is Eid.

[manicson]

The great barrier grief.

On the verge of submitting my MA dissertation I am here being faced with huge two blockades: 1. I don't think my data is sufficient, and if I continue to create my missing data the overall argument will look very weak. Then there is the problem of grammar mistakes, its all over the place. I can't write a single sentence correctly. 

Yesterday I and My supervisor / SV sat down to read my first draft. It was incomplete. I knew it when I submitted it even. But hearing it from the person who is to grade you its another thing. The missing data consists of the core of the whole theses. The two Fatwas given by the two religious groups are to be pit against each other. the other thing I have to do is to get a sense of why these two groups hold that beliefs. I know why. But that is not enough it has to be elaborated upon in a way that I can actually make a thorough analysis on how the selection of evidence is being dealt with by the groups. So there you go I'm naked.  Okay! lets talk about grammar, So the thing is there is this one friend who is willing to help me to edit it. But the question is how well can she do the job, given the fact that she herself will be concerned with finishing her own work. Both of us have the same deadline which is 16th of this month. 

I am supposed to submit my second draft my 13th to SV. I have to submit the editor the final draft by 10th. And today is 7th. I feel suffocated. 

[manicson]

<3

[manicson]

Trying to focus..

This is my second addition on this blog. So I kinda have decided that I will be taking Violence and Suffering as the second course that I am gonna opt for. And Sociology of Law will be the other course. So now that little headache has been taken care of I think I should start to really think about my dissertation writing. So far what I have done is just record the interviews which I think are somewhat of an ok job I did during the winter break. Even though I couldn't take interviews of the Tax issue I think I have a pretty good material to work on.  Last week I was thinking of starting to type the interviews and finishing them before by the end of this month. Guess what! I still haven't started. Typing will be just a hard job to do. I think if I am typing I will be translating them as well. Because that will help me in the later stages of the writing process. I got a bit of a glimpse of this in the last years Qualitative Research Methods class. For that class I took three interviews and transcribe-translated all of them. after that it was just a matter of copy-pasting and editing. Let’s just say there is something unique and easy to the way one could access to text than to audio.  Since today is 20th of this month I don't think I will be able to finish more than 10 interviews before February. And that's also if I stopped watching this tv series and actually start doing some work. Uuugg! I don't think I will be able to sleep tonight because I have to attend two classes tomorrow.  I know this is just some out of focus rambling. Its not a blog. hehe. more like a diary! Then why am I writing it online?  Soo... Okay let’s do this I'll read tonight and in tomorrow's post I'll try to write on what I understood from those pieces. 

[manicson]

Hi world! Let's select some courses.

Right now I'm feeling a bit confused. I don't know what to choose from these optional courses that I have been given from the university for this semester.  I would love to opt the Violence & Suffering class. It has such a good reading list and it seems that they are very theoretical too. (I love social theorising, duh!). But I don't think that it will be of any help for my current dissertation topic, not at least directly. The first class I attended didn't give me that much of a good impression. I only kinda felt a little bit nauseated. You have to be present in the class that day. As a start we were shown a documentary on some Indonesian gang violence being replayed by some of those perpetrators. This one guy at the end even vomited. Eww!  

Then there is the Social History of South Asia class. I have not attended any of the first two classes last week. But I have the readings. I have checked one of them and I think that's really nice and interesting. I think the course is going to be theoretical as well as a critique of historiography. And plus I kinda hope that course will give me a some additional branches and ideas for my dissertation because I kinda think that he whole course is going to instructed from a very left leaning point of view. 

Okay, then there is the whole kinda obligatory but optional course of Sociology of Law. The course is being taught by my Dissertation supervisor plus that is exactly the area of my dissertation and the whole idea of the course even being offered as an optional course even started because I asked for the course. Initially I wanted the course to be in the last semester, but for some reason they had to delay it for the final semester. (ok enough complain..) I just wanna say how thankful I am and happy and excited I am fo this course even being taught here.

Thank you all for reading and have a very good night. 

Oh shit. I still haven't finished the reading for tomorrow's VS class! So gotta finish it before I call it a night. Bye.