Marauders Head-Canons

My favorite Marauders text posts.

[incorrectmarauderquotes]

Well, at least it’s not herpes. Or do you have that as well?

James Potter [to Sirius, after he got dumped] (via incorrectmarauderquotes)

[owlpostagain]

Reminder

Lily was not a trophy to be awarded to the most moral dude in the room. This is not a fairy tale where the knight slays the dragon and gets to keep the princess as a reward. That’s not how life works. Lily did not owe Snape her loyalty, and that wouldn’t have changed even if he had switched sides. Neither Lily nor any of the other female characters are a reward.

And no human being “deserves” another human being.

[marauders-textposts-blog]

The Marauders at Hogwarts

Professor McGonagall: No, don't do that, it's against school rules, you'll be expelled.

Marauders: 🎶how bout we do anyway🎶

[marauders-textposts-blog]

Remus: *Desperately tries to straighten his extremely curly hair for a date*

Remus:

Remus: Wow

Remus: Even my hair isn't straight.

[marauders-textposts-blog]

Harry: My dad didn't STRUT!

Remus: *looks into camera like he's on The Office*

[angie-kang-deactivated20220614]

a Jily wedding in the style of Jim and Pam’s on the office

[marauders-textposts-blog]

Sirius: LiLy PoTTeR stop STEALING my leather jacket

Lily: Sirius, you steal my hairbrush, husband, sofa, and child on a regular basis I think I have joint custody of this jacket

[edhmund]

She hated him!            Nah, she didn’t.

[deadssirius-deactivated20180623]

when mcgonogall found out that sirius’ boggart was his parents and asked him to stay at hogwarts during the holidays he said no because he “couldn’t leave his brother alone with them”

[siyahluna-deactivated20180322]

[marauders-textposts-blog]

James: Sorry Professor, we just got a bit carried away.

McGonagall: As I understand it, Black was carried away by Professor Slughorn and Professor Flitwick - after lying in a pool of his own vomit!

Sirius: Actually, it was James’ vomit, Professor - I was just lying in it.

[marauders-textposts-blog]

James: *whispers a plan*

Sirius: How dare you? That's horrible!

Remus: Good, I was afraid you would-

Sirius: I'm in!

[redheadedemily]

Okay so

Remus accidentally blowing up a potions classroom and asking Lily to take the blame because Slughorn loves her and would never give her detention

Lily doing it if he gives her chocolate Lily doing almost anything short of kill a man for chocolate

Remus carrying chocolate around wherever he goes to give to Lily when he needs to borrow notes or something

Remus keeping this habit for the rest of his life

[harry-potter-headcanon]

Marauders language headcanons

James- Speaks an odd language he and Sirius made up first year, and a few phrases in German

Sirius- Is conversationally fluent in french and knows curse words in over 20 languages

Remus- Functional, though not fluent, in German, knows a few phrases in Gaelic, and knows how to communicate with any welsh or Scottish person perfectly. It scares everyone else because what is he saying? I think its English but maybe not and what is that sound he just made in the back of his throat wHAT

peter- Peters the one with functional phrases in several languages. He can ask for directions, say he’s lost, and ask for a bar. You know, the necessities.

[duneekah]

Tonks finding shapes in Remus’ scars.

‘Look! It’s a sheep!’

‘Aw, it’s a widdle heart!’

'Hehehe, this one looks like a butt.’

[marauders-textposts-blog]

Sirius Black Friday

Sirius: Fondue pots are 60% off!

Remus: We already have a perfectly fine fondue pot. We do not need another one.

Sirius: Remus! We need this! It's 75% off

Remus: That is the ugliest fucking wall hanging I've ever seen. We're only here to get a new set of pots and pans. That's it.

Sirius: AHHH REMUS! DOG COATS ARE 80% OFF!

Remus: You told me you would castrate me if I ever tried to put Padfoot in clothes ever again!

Sirius: Yes, but Moony would look so cute in it! Look there's even a hood with ear holes!

Remus: Moony will wear one if Padfoot does.

Sirius: ....

Sirius: DEAL! Do you think they have these in stag and rat sizes?

Remus: We can probably charm them different sizes.

Sirius: FOUR DOG COATS COMING UP!

Remus: ...I get the green one.

[narcolepticshipsinkers]

Headcanon that James Potter really enjoys pissing off Sirius by replacing his middle name “Orion” with “Onion”.

“Sirius Onion Black, if your mother knew about this…” “Sod off Prongs, shouldn’t you be pulling Santa’s sleigh?”