Paradoxical Has-been

Predictably unpredictable. You won't like me. You never will.

[infjparadox]

“Don’t underestimate the quiet ones, the ones who don’t always say what’s on their minds. Inside their heads, there is chaos. A beautiful snow storm of chaos.”

— (via majestic-p0tat0-unic0rn)

[margeinaliax]

Happy Birthday, Self! You have 24 hrs for Day 1 of your 24th year of existence. May your day and existence be filled with love, hope, peace and inspiration. You can do it, self! All that you’ve been aiming for. Make this year your year. Have faith. Especially in Him. ❤️

[margeinaliax]

I once heard ‘what you don’t know won’t hurt you.’ And ... yeah, indeed.

9:00am, 23rd of January 2020

[margeinaliax]

It’s just sad how you free your time for your love, yet can’t free their time for you.

10:48pm, 21st of January 2020

[margeinaliax]

Am I that alone? That I always crave for attention or care? Yeah sometimes I just let them do it what they want to do. Well, these past few months I always let them. I do my best to control every emotions that takes place, or I do my best not to let them know I’m not okay. I drown myself with the thoughts, I always allow them to eat me up even though it’s not healthy. I want to vent out, but I don’t want to bother them. I don’t want that feeling of rejection or invalidation especially when it comes to my feelings. I also don’t want to be a burden. A burden because I’m an attention-seeker, a burden because I’m so selfish and so self-centered. Maybe that’s why I always keep it to myself. Yeah maybe it’s better to just keep it to myself. Maybe I’m really that alone.

4:00 am, 24th of November 2019

[margeinaliax]

Yeah I think that’s the biggest thing. You know who’s really there when there’s something wrong about what you feel. If someone truly cares, he/she will ask you what bothers you or what and who made you feel that way. They may say that they care for you, but they really don’t. You have no one but yourself.

10:28 pm, 4th of July 2019

[margeinaliax]

Just last night I felt gratitude over this tricycle driver who just ride me home for free (I don’t have any coins but only a hundred peso bill). How heartwarming someone helped you, even if they know they have less than you. I just wish this nation has full people like kuya. Bless him please 😊

7:45am, 15th of June 2019

[margeinaliax]

How can someone manages to sleep well knowing that their love one is upset or emotionally not feeling well? :(

17th of March 2019, 2:18 AM

[thelovejournals]

Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up.

Neil Gaiman, The Kindly Ones (via thelovejournals)

[wnq-typography]

Tired  |  @wnq-typography

[wordsnquotes]

“You’ve got a war in your head And it’s tearing you up inside.”

— The Waterboys, This Is The Sea

[margeinaliax]

I just made another disappointment today. I don’t know how to continue my day knowing I just wasted another time, money and effort for the thing I know I wanted. I should’ve listened in the first place. I should’ve not let my ego eat me. I just wish I could see it positively and could handle it. I need strength.

8:36 AM, 18th of December 2018

[margeinaliax]

I always tell myself to stop depending my happiness on others. I bet not, I always fail to do so. Yet, when time comes and they’re not there to make me happy, I’m always lost. I overthink. Thoughts eat me and drown inside me. And sleep is my escape.

12:42 am, 1st of December 2018

[wordsnquotes]

“Nobody looks like what they really are on the inside. You don’t. I don’t. People are much more complicated than that.”

— Neil Gaiman, The Ocean at the End of the Lane

[wordsnquotes]

“You don’t pass or fail at being a person, dear.”

— Neil Gaiman, The Ocean at the End of the Lane

[wordsnquotes]

“I admit, I was afraid to love. Not just love, but to love her. For she was a stunning mystery. She carried things deep inside her that no one has yet to understand, and I, I was afraid to fail, like the others. She was the ocean and i was just a boy who loved the waves but was completely terrified to swim.”

— Christopher Poindexter

[wordsnquotes]

“Deep in her heart, she wasn’t sure she deserved to be happy, nor did she believe that she was worthy of someone who seemed…normal.”

— Nicholas Sparks, Safe Haven