He just wanted a family.
He’s so special to me. 🥺

tannertan36
noise dept.
One Nice Bug Per Day
Claire Keane
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

Kaledo Art
d e v o n
Cosimo Galluzzi
Game of Thrones Daily

oozey mess

Origami Around
DEAR READER
$LAYYYTER
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roma★
tumblr dot com
Monterey Bay Aquarium

#extradirty

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@marie-lyn
He just wanted a family.
He’s so special to me. 🥺
LET ME AT HIMMMMM
POV: You're Ryland Grace
WE GOT THE FUCKING POLAROID YALL WE FUCKING WON
Back to me. (pt 2)
pairing: Ryland Grace x afab!reader
description: ryland’s been gone for almost 22 years. From saving earth to saving Erid, he felt as if it was time to finally go back home. Back to you.
warnings: insane amount of angst..my bad. a bit of fluff at the end but genuinely most of this is just me crying and feeling like breaking everyone’s hearts.
authors note: cough. i have…no words. this is so long. and so sad. BUT WOOO HAPPY ENDING (sortve..) Thank you all for the love you’ve given this story, i appreciate it so much.
Waiting was worse than mourning.
At least mourning had an end point, something solid to hold onto, even if it hurt. There was a kind of structure to it. A routine. You learned how to wake up, how to breathe, how to exist around the absence.
But this?
This was chaos.
Because now there was something on the other side of it.
I stood in the kitchen, staring at the coffee maker like it had personally wronged me. It had been six months. Six months since I watched the last video. Six months since I heard him say it..”I’m coming home”. Six months of checking every news update, every official statement, every tiny scrap of information released to the public like it wasn’t the only thing keeping me sane.
Nothing.
“Cool,” I muttered, dragging a hand down my face. “That’s fine. Totally fine. I love not knowing anything. Huge fan of it, actually.”
The coffee maker beeped.
I glared at it.
“Don’t start with me.”
Silence. Then, with a quiet click, it finished brewing. I exhaled, grabbing the mug, his mug, still chipped at the rim, and leaned against the counter.
This had become routine.
Wake up. Check for updates. Pretend to function like a normal human being. Check again. Try not to spiral. Fail. Repeat.
They wouldn’t tell me anything.
Not really. Just vague, carefully worded statements from people who clearly knew more than they were saying.
Progress is being monitored. All available data is under review. No confirmed timeline at this stage.
I hated them.
All of them.
Because somewhere in all of that, He was either getting closer, or he wasn’t. And I had no way of knowing which.
I took a sip of the coffee and immediately winced.
“Still terrible,” I muttered. “You’d hate it.” The words slipped out so easily now.
Talking to him. Like he could hear me. Like maybe, somehow, he would.
I pushed off the counter, pacing the length of the kitchen, the same path I’d worn into the floor over the past few months.
“You said you were coming home,” I said under my breath. “That wasn’t a metaphor, right? Because I’m taking that very literally.”
My chest tightened, but not like before.
Not hollow. Not empty.
Full. Too full.
“You don’t get to say that and then just, what, take your time?” I continued, a nervous edge creeping into my voice. “No, absolutely not. I’ve already done the whole waiting thing. I’m actually very experienced in that area, and I would like to formally resign.” I huffed out a breath, stopping in the middle of the room. Silence answered me.
It always did.
But now… It felt temporary. My gaze drifted toward the living room. Toward the couch.
Toward the spot where I’d sat, over and over again, watching every single video he’d left behind. I could still hear his voice if I tried hard enough.
“I’m coming home.”
My grip tightened around the mug.
“You better be,” I whispered.
A beat. Then, quieter,
“I’m still here.” The words settled into the room, soft but certain. Not broken. Not lost.
Waiting.
And this time..It wasn’t endless.
It happened at 2:17 a.m. Of course it did. Nothing life-changing ever happened at a reasonable hour. My phone rang once….then again.
I was already awake, waiting had ruined sleep for me, turned it into something shallow and fragile. So when the screen lit up on my nightstand, I grabbed it before the second ring could finish.
Unknown number. My stomach dropped.
“Hello?” My voice came out rough, uneven.
“Is this—” the voice on the other end hesitated, then confirmed my name. “This is Dr. Alvarez with mission operations. We need you to come in. Immediately.” My heart slammed against my ribs.
“Why?” I asked, already throwing the blankets off, already standing.
A pause.
Then.. “We’ve received something.”
Everything in me went still. “Something?” I repeated. Another pause. Careful. Controlled.
“An object has entered Earth’s atmosphere. It matches the projected trajectory.”
I didn’t remember ending the call.
The drive was a blur.
Streetlights smeared together, red lights ignored, my hands gripping the wheel so tightly my knuckles ached. Every thought crashed into the next, too fast to hold onto.
It’s him. It has to be him.
He said he was coming home.
By the time I reached the facility, I was shaking.
Someone met me at the entrance—badge, clipboard, the kind of calm that only made everything feel worse. “This way,” they said quickly.
I didn’t ask questions. I couldn’t.
They led me through hallways I barely registered, into a room filled with screens, data scrolling, voices overlapping, tension so thick it felt like it had weight.
“Status?” someone called.
“Object has landed. Recovery team is en route.”
Landed. My breath caught.
“Where?” I asked, my voice too loud, too sharp. A few heads turned. Dr. Alvarez stepped closer, expression tight. “Pacific. Coordinates are still being confirmed.” Ocean. Okay.
That was okay.
That was— “Is he..” My voice faltered. “Is there a signal? Anything?”
Silence. Too long.
“We don’t know yet,” Alvarez said carefully. But I wasn’t listening anymore. My eyes were locked on the largest screen in the room, a live feed flickering to life. Dark water. Search lights cutting across the surface. Helicopter blades roaring somewhere overhead.
“Recovery team approaching object,” a voice narrated. My pulse was deafening. A shape emerged from the darkness. Metal. Damaged. Scorched. But intact. “Oh my god,” I breathed. “That’s it,” someone said. “That’s the return craft.” Return craft.
He made it.
He actually..
My hands flew to my mouth, tears already spilling over before I could stop them. “He made it,” I whispered, shaking. “He made it..”
“Stand by,” another voice cut in. “Thermal scan in progress.” I barely heard it. I couldn’t look away.
The camera zoomed closer. Closer. The surface of the craft was scarred, burned from reentry, but there, near the side, A hatch.
“Thermal scan complete,” someone said.
A pause. Then-
“No heat signatures detected.” Everything stopped. “What?” I said, too quickly. “No, run it again. That has to be wrong.” “Re-running.”
My chest tightened, breath coming faster. “That’s him,” I insisted, stepping forward. “That’s his ship. He’s in there. He has to be.”
“Second scan confirms,” the voice said, quieter this time. “No internal heat signatures.”
The room went still. No.
“No,” I said again, shaking my head. “No, that doesn’t make any sense. He wouldn’t..he said he was coming home, he wouldn’t just—” No one answered me.
On the screen, the recovery team reached the craft. One of them moved toward the hatch.“Preparing to open.” My entire body felt like it was about to collapse in on itself. “Please,” I whispered. I didn’t even know who I was talking to anymore. “Please.”
The hatch released with a hiss. It opened slowly. Darkness inside. A light was shined in. I leaned forward, like I could see better if I just got closer, like I could will him into existence. “Interior is—” the voice faltered.
My heart stopped.
“Empty.”
I didn’t remember falling. But suddenly I was on the floor. Someone was saying my name. Someone else was trying to help me up.
I couldn’t hear them.
Empty.
Empty.
Empty.
“No,” I whispered, my voice hollow. “No, that’s not- no, you’re wrong, you have to be wrong!” But the screen didn’t change. The ship was there. Open. And empty. A broken sound tore out of me before I could stop it. “He said he was coming home,” I choked. “He said..” My chest felt like it was caving in, like all the air had been ripped out at once. “I believed him,” I whispered.
Silence swallowed the room again. Heavy. Crushing.
Until.. “Wait.” The word cut through everything. Sharp. Urgent.
I froze. “What?” someone asked.
“There’s another signal,” a technician said, eyes locked on their screen. “Faint, but, it’s not coming from the craft.” My head snapped up. “What do you mean?” Alvarez demanded.
The technician swallowed. “It’s further out. Same general trajectory but—” they hesitated, then said it, “—it looks like a second object.” My heart slammed painfully back to life “Second…?” I breathed.
On the main screen, the feed shifted, coordinates updating, the camera panning back out over the dark ocean.
Scanning. Waiting.
“Trying to get a visual now,” the technician said. The room held its breath. So did I. The room didn’t breathe. No one moved. Every screen was locked onto the same patch of dark, endless ocean as the coordinates recalibrated.
“Visual incoming,” the technician said, voice tight. Static flickered.
Then..something small broke the surface. Not like the first craft. Not large. Not damaged in the same way. A capsule. My heart slammed so hard it hurt. “That’s not the same object,” someone said quickly. “It’s smaller, way smaller.” “Zoom in,” Alvarez snapped. The image sharpened.
Metal. Scorched from reentry, but intact. A compact, narrow capsule rocking against the waves, half-submerged but holding.
Alive. It looked alive.
“Thermal scan,” I said, barely recognizing my own voice. They were already running it. Those few seconds stretched into something unbearable.
I couldn’t blink. Couldn’t breathe.
Please.
“Thermal signature detected.” Everything in me stopped. “Repeat that,” Alvarez said. “Confirmed,” the technician said, louder now. “One heat signature. Inside the capsule.”
One.
A sob broke out of me before I could stop it, sharp, disbelieving, my hands flying back over my mouth. “He’s in there,” I choked. “He’s..he’s in there.”
“Recovery team, redirect immediately,” Alvarez ordered. “New coordinates transmitting now.” On the screen, the helicopters shifted, cutting across the dark water toward the smaller capsule.
Closer. I couldn’t feel my legs anymore.
Someone was saying something to me, asking if I needed to sit, but I shook them off, eyes locked on the screen like if I looked away, it would disappear. It had to be him. It had to be.
The first craft? Empty.
A decoy? A sacrifice? Something he’d used to..
My thoughts spiraled, too fast to follow.
All that mattered was, he was alive.
The search lights found the capsule, flooding it in harsh white. It bobbed in the waves, small and fragile against the vast ocean, but it held.
“Approaching now,” a voice said.
A diver dropped first. Then another.
The camera shook as they moved in, hands gripping the sides of the capsule, securing it. “Preparing to open,” came the call.
My entire body locked.
“Careful,” someone added. “We don’t know what condition” “I know,” the diver snapped. “Just stand by.” The hatch was smaller than the first one. Tighter. It took longer. Every second scraped against my nerves. “Hatch is sealed tight,” the diver said. “Looks like manual override from the inside.”
My breath caught. From the inside.
“He got himself here,” I whispered. “He made it.”Metal groaned. Then, a sharp hiss. The hatch gave. Slowly, carefully, they pulled it open. Darkness inside. A light cut through it. I leaned forward, my entire world narrowing to that single moment. “Contact,” the diver said. My heart stopped. “He’s..he’s here. He’s alive.”
Everything broke at once. A sob ripped out of me, my knees giving out again, but this time, I didn’t feel the ground the same way. Didn’t feel the collapse.
“He’s conscious,” the diver added quickly. “Barely, but, he’s responsive.” A broken laugh escaped me through the tears. “Of course he is,” I gasped. On the screen, they carefully pulled him from the capsule. For a second, it didn’t feel real. Too thin. Too pale. Wrapped in something I didn’t recognize, his body limp as they lifted him.
But it was him.
“Ryland Grace is confirmed,” someone said behind me. The name hit me like a shockwave. Not a memory. Not a recording.
Real.
“He’s alive.” I pressed my hands to my mouth, shaking so hard I could barely stay upright. On the screen, his head shifted slightly. Just enough. Just enough to prove it wasn’t a dream. And then..his eyes opened. Only for a second. But I saw it. “Did you see that?” I cried, half-laughing, half-sobbing. “He- his eyes-“
No one answered.
They were all watching. Just like me.
Like the entire world had narrowed down to this one impossible, fragile miracle. “They’re bringing him in,” Alvarez said, softer now. “Medical is standing by.” I barely heard it. Because I couldn’t stop staring. “You made it,” I whispered, tears falling freely now. “You actually made it.” My voice broke completely on the last word. “I’m here,” I added, like he could somehow hear me across the distance. “I’m still here.”
On the screen, they secured him, lifting him carefully toward the helicopter. Alive. And this time, he wasn’t out of reach anymore.
The helicopter blades were already spinning when they rushed me out onto the pad. The cold air whipped around me, loud, disorienting, but none of it felt real. Not the lights. Not the people. Not the rush of movement. Only one thing did.
He’s here.
“ETA?” I shouted over the noise as someone helped me into the seat. “Forty minutes,” the pilot called back. Forty minutes. My hands clenched in my lap. That was nothing. That was everything.
I couldn’t sit still. My leg bounced uncontrollably, my fingers twisting together so tightly they hurt. Every second stretched, warped, dragged itself out like it was doing it on purpose.
“What’s his condition?” I asked, louder than I meant to. A medic across from me glanced up from a tablet. “Severe dehydration. Muscle atrophy. Likely prolonged stress exposure,” they said. “But he was conscious on retrieval. That’s a very good sign.”
Conscious.
My chest tightened.
“Did he say anything?” I asked. The medic hesitated. “Not that we have recorded yet. He was in and out.” I nodded, even though it didn’t help. I stared at the floor for a second.
“Did he ask for anyone?” The question slipped out before I could stop it. The medic looked at me, something softer in their expression now. “We don’t know,” they said gently. “But… he’s coming back to a world that knows he’s here.”
That wasn’t what I meant. But I nodded anyway.
The helicopter ride felt endless. Too loud. Too slow. Too far. I kept replaying the footage in my head. The hatch opening. His face. The way his eyes had barely flickered open. He’s alive.
Every time that thought hit, it felt unreal all over again. Like I might wake up and lose it. Like this was just another cruel almost. My nails dug into my palms. “No,” I whispered under my breath. “No, this is real. He’s here. He’s here.”
I said it over and over.
Like I was anchoring myself to it.
When we landed, I was out before the helicopter fully settled. “Ma’am-” someone called after me, but I was already moving, already running toward the building lit up ahead. Bright lights. Open doors. People rushing in and out. Controlled chaos.
“Ryland Grace,” I said to the first person I saw, breathless. “Where is he?” They blinked, startled.“Level three..medical—”
I didn’t wait.
The hallway blurred as I ran. My footsteps echoed too loudly, my breath coming in sharp, uneven bursts I couldn’t control.
This is it.
Every step brought me closer. Closer than I’d been in years. Closer than I ever thought I’d be again. My hand hit the door to the medical wing hard enough that it slammed open. People turned. Voices started. I ignored all of it.
“Where is he?” I demanded.
A nurse stepped forward, trying to intercept me.“You can’t just—!” “Please,” I said, the word breaking apart in my chest. “Please. I need to see him.” Something in my voice must’ve gotten through, because the resistance softened. Just a little. “He’s in stabilization,” she said carefully. “They’re still working on him.”
“I don’t care,” I whispered. “I’ve waited long enough.” A pause.
“…Room 7.” I didn’t say thank you. I couldn’t. I was already moving again.
The door to Room 7 stood at the end of the hall.
Closed.
Everything in me slowed as I approached it. My steps. My breathing. My heartbeat. No..not slowed. Louder. So loud I could barely hear anything else. He was on the other side of that door. Not a screen. Not a memory. Not a voice in a recording.
Him. My hand lifted, hovered over the handle, shaking. For a second, I couldn’t do it. Because the moment I opened that door, Everything would change. The waiting would be over. The not knowing. The distance.
All of it.
My breath caught. Then, as quiet as ever, “I’m here.” And I pushed the door open. The room was too bright. That was the first thing I noticed. Harsh white lights, machines humming softly, voices low and clinical as people moved around the bed.
My breath caught. He was there.
Still. Pale. Smaller than I remembered, like the years had worn him down to something fragile, but it was him. Undeniably him. Wires ran from his arms, monitors blinking steadily beside him, a slow, rhythmic beeping filling the space.
Alive.
But not awake. Something in my chest cracked.
All that distance, all that waiting, and now that I was here, I didn’t know how to move. Then I took one step forward. Then another. No one stopped me. Maybe they understood. Maybe they could see that nothing was going to keep me away now.
“Ryland,” I said, my voice breaking on his name. It sounded too loud in the quiet room. Too small at the same time.
No response. Of course not. He was unconscious. They said he’d been in and out, but still I moved closer, my hands trembling at my sides.“I’m here,” I whispered. The words barely made it out. My vision blurred again, tears spilling over before I could stop them.
“You said you were coming home,” I choked. “You-..you actually did it, you idiot.” A broken laugh slipped through the sob that followed. “I can’t believe you actually did it.” My knees gave out beside the bed, my hand gripping the edge of it just to stay upright.
“I waited,” I said, the words tumbling out now, years of them all at once. “I waited for you. I didn’t- I didn’t move on, I didn’t leave, I just..I stayed, I stayed right where you left me and I-” My voice collapsed completely.
“I’m still yours.”
Silence. Only the steady beep of the monitor.
“I thought you left me,” I whispered, shaking. “For so long, I thought you chose to go and I hated you for it and I..God, I’m so sorry, I didn’t know, I didn’t know they took you, I didn’t know.” A sob tore through me, harsher this time.
“I’m so sorry.” My hand lifted, hesitating for just a second before I let it rest gently against his. Warm. Not memory. Not imagined.
Real.
“I’m here now,” I whispered. “You don’t have to-”
The monitor shifted. A subtle change. Faster.
I froze. “..wait,” someone said behind me, suddenly alert. But I couldn’t look away. His fingers twitched. Just barely. My breath caught in my throat. “Ryland?” I said, my voice trembling. Another twitch.
Slowly, His brow furrowed.
A faint, strained breath pulled from his chest.
“Easy,” a doctor said somewhere behind me, but their voice sounded distant. Muffled. Because his eyes.. his eyes were opening. Slow. Unfocused. Struggling against the light. But opening. “Oh my god,” I breathed. “Ryland,” I said again, louder this time, the word breaking apart with everything I was feeling. “Ryland, I’m here.” His gaze shifted.
Unsteady. Searching. Then it landed on me. And stopped. For a second, neither of us moved. Like the world had paused just to make sure this was real. His lips parted slightly. No sound came out. But I saw it.
The recognition. The disbelief. The you’re real written all over his face. A sob broke out of me, uncontrollable, overwhelming. “I’m here,” I cried, gripping his hand tighter. “I’m right here, I didn’t go anywhere, I’m still here.”
His fingers curled weakly around mine. It wasn’t strong. Barely anything at all. But it was enough. Enough to shatter whatever control I had left. “I thought I lost you,” I choked. “I thought..I thought you were gone forever and you- you just..” My words dissolved into sobs, my head dropping as everything finally caught up to me at once.
Years of grief.
Months of waiting.
All of it crashing down now that he was actually here.
His thumb moved. Slow. Careful. Brushing against my hand. Grounding. “Hey,” he tried. The word was barely there. Hoarse. Broken from disuse. But it was him. That was enough. I let out a shaky, disbelieving laugh through my tears, lifting my head just enough to look at him again. “Hey?” I repeated, half crying, half laughing. “That’s- that’s what you start with?”
His mouth twitched. The smallest hint of a smile.“Yeah,” he rasped. “Figured… keep it simple.”Another sob escaped me, softer this time. Relief. Pure, overwhelming relief.
“You’re unbelievable,” I whispered, shaking my head. “You disappear for years, come back from space, and your first word is hey?” He blinked slowly, exhaustion pulling at him, but his gaze didn’t leave mine. “You’re here,” he murmured. Like he still couldn’t believe it.
My chest tightened, but this time, it didn’t hurt the same way. “I told you,” I said softly, squeezing his hand. “I didn’t go anywhere.” Something in his expression shifted. Eased. The tension he’d been holding onto, maybe for years, finally loosening just a little. “Good,” he whispered.
Silence settled over the room again. But it wasn’t heavy anymore. It wasn’t empty. I leaned closer, carefully, resting my forehead gently against his hand. Not rushing. Not panicking. Just… there.“You made it home,” I said quietly.
His fingers tightened slightly around mine. “Yeah,” he breathed. A pause. Then, softer—
“Guess I did.”
The house hadn’t changed. Not really.
Maybe that was why he stopped in the doorway. I watched him from a few steps behind, keys still loose in my hand, as he just… stood there. Taking it in.
The same couch. The same pictures on the wall. The same soft light filtering through the windows like nothing in the universe had shifted.
Like he hadn’t crossed galaxies. Like I hadn’t spent years learning how to live without him.
His hand tightened slightly on the doorframe. “Wow,” he said quietly. “Yeah,” I answered. “It’s… pretty much the same.” He nodded, almost absently—but he didn’t move right away.
Like stepping further in might break it.
Then, slowly, he did. The door clicked shut behind us. He exhaled, and I saw it—the way his shoulders dropped just a little, like something he’d been holding onto for years finally loosened.
His hand brushed the back of the couch as he passed.
Then the shelf.
Then the counter.
Not quite touching—just… there.
Like he needed to feel everything without fully committing to it yet.
He stopped at the chipped mug, picking it up with a faint, disbelieving smile. “You still have this?” he asked. “You refused to throw it away,” I said. “I stand by that,” he murmured. “It has character.”
“It’s broken.” “Same thing.” That small smile stayed—but softer now. Quieter. He set the mug down carefully, like it mattered more than it should.
Then— He glanced at me again. And this time… he didn’t look away. There was something different in it now. Not just relief. Not just disbelief. Something closer. Warmer.
Like he was realizing I was actually there. I shifted slightly under his gaze, suddenly very aware of the space between us. It wasn’t far. But it felt… fragile. Like neither of us quite knew how to cross it yet.
He took a step closer, Then stopped. His hand lifted—just a little—like he was going to reach for me. But he didn’t. Instead, he let it fall back to his side, exhaling a quiet, almost nervous breath.“Sorry,” he said, a faint, awkward smile slipping through. “I just—” He shook his head. “I keep thinking if I touch anything, it’s going to disappear.”
My chest tightened. “It won’t,” I said softly.
He looked at me like he wanted to believe that. Then, a little more carefully this time, he stepped closer again. Close enough now that I could see the way his hands hovered—restless, unsure what they were allowed to do. Like he didn’t trust himself not to reach. “I missed you,” he said quietly.
Not dramatic.
Not overwhelming.
Just… honest. The kind that lands deeper.
“I know,” I whispered. His breath hitched slightly.
And this time— He did reach. Slowly. Carefully. Like I might pull away. His fingers brushed my sleeve first. Light. Barely there.
Testing.
When I didn’t move, his hand slid a little further—resting gently against my arm, like he just needed to feel that I was real.
He let out a breath that almost sounded like relief. “Okay,” he murmured, more to himself than to me. “Okay… you’re still here.” “I told you,” I said, my voice softer now.
His grip tightened just slightly—not enough to hurt, just enough to hold onto something. Like he’d been waiting years to do exactly this. “I know,” he said. “I just—” He swallowed, shaking his head faintly. “I didn’t realize how much I’d… miss this.” His thumb moved without thinking, brushing lightly against my arm.
I stepped closer then, closing that last bit of space between us. This time, he didn’t hesitate. His other hand came up—resting at my side, gentle but certain, like he couldn’t quite stop himself anymore. Not pulling me in. “You’re really here,” he said again.
I nodded, a small smile breaking through.
“So are you.” Something in his expression softened completely at that. Like that was the part he still didn’t believe. “I wasn’t sure I’d get back to this,” he admitted. His hands shifted slightly, like he needed to keep contact—needed to make sure I wouldn’t disappear if he let go.
“I didn’t think I’d get back to you.” My chest tightened, but it didn’t hurt the same way anymore. “You did,” I said.
Then, quieter— “You’re home.” That did it. I saw it in the way his eyes closed for just a second.
The way his shoulders finally dropped. The way his hands tightened just a little more, like he was holding onto something he’d almost lost forever.
“Yeah,” he breathed. A beat. “I am.”
We stayed like that for a moment.
Close.
Not rushing. Just… existing in the same space again.
And for the first time— It didn’t feel fragile anymore.
It felt real.
The house had gone quiet in a way that felt almost unreal. Not the empty kind of quiet she’d lived with for years—this was different. Shared. Warm at the edges. Ryland stood in the bedroom doorway for a long moment, like he wasn’t sure he was allowed to be there.
“I used to think about this place,” he said quietly. I leaned against the doorframe across from him. “Yeah?” He nodded once. Then again, like he was confirming it to himself.
“Not in a big dramatic way,” he added, a faint, tired smile tugging at his mouth. “Just… little things. The way the light hits that corner in the morning. The way you always steal the blanket even though you deny it.” My breath caught on a small laugh. “I do not steal it.”
He raised an eyebrow. “You absolutely do.”
A pause. Then they both smiled, softer now, like the weight of everything didn’t feel quite as crushing when it was shared. Neither of them said anything for a moment after that.
They didn’t need to.
The world outside the room still existed—people, reports, recovery schedules, explanations waiting to be given—but none of it mattered in here. Not yet.
Ryland stepped inside first. Slow. Careful. Like he was entering something sacred. And I followed. The bed was unmade, unchanged, stubbornly ordinary.
He stopped beside it.
“I don’t think I’m going to sleep,” he admitted.
“Me neither,” I said immediately. That earned a quiet breath of a laugh from him.
“Yeah,” he murmured. “Didn’t think so.” They sat down at the same time, like gravity finally decided to stop arguing with them.
The mattress dipped between them. For a second, neither moved. Just… present.
Real.
Then Ryland shifted first, hesitating only a moment before lying back. One arm resting awkwardly at his side, like he still wasn’t sure what to do with himself in a bed that didn’t belong to a ship or a hospital.
I layed down too. Carefully.
Like if I moved too fast, I might wake up somewhere else. The ceiling looked the same.
That was the strangest part.
After everything—after space and silence and decades of waiting—it was still just a ceiling.
Ryland turned his head slightly.
Looked at me.
Really looked.
And something in his face softened in a way that didn’t have words attached to it. “You’re real,” he said quietly. I huffed a breath. “You keep saying that.” “I know,” he admitted. “It’s just… I don’t think my brain caught up yet.”
“I thought I’d lost this.”
My throat tightened.
“You didn’t,” I said. His hand shifted slightly on the mattress—not quite reaching, just close enough that their fingers brushed by accident.
Or maybe not. Neither of them moved away.
That seemed to be a pattern now.
“I kept imagining this moment wrong,” he said after a while. “Yeah?” I asked. “Yeah,” he said. “I thought it would feel like everything goes back to how it was before.” He exhaled slowly. “It doesn’t.”
My heart sank for half a second—until he added: “It feels… different.”
I turned my head toward him. He was still looking at the ceiling. But his hand had inched a little closer to hers.
“Not worse,” he clarified quickly, like he needed her to understand that part. “Just… real in a way the memory never was.” Silence stretched between them again.
Comfortable this time.
Not empty.
Outside, somewhere far away, the world kept moving. Inside this room, it didn’t matter.
I felt his fingers finally settle against mine fully. No hesitation now.
Just contact.
Grounding.
“I’m scared I’m going to wake up and you’re gone again,” he admitted quietly. My chest tightened.
“Then don’t sleep,” I said, trying for lightness but landing somewhere softer.
A faint smile. “Already ahead of you,” he murmured.
A pause. Then, after a moment—
“Hey.”
“Yeah?”
His grip on my hand tightened slightly. “I’m glad you waited for me, sweet girl.”
My breath caught. Hearing the nickname he had given me in real life for the first time in years struck me.
For a second, I couldn’t answer.
Then—
“Me too baby..” I whispered.
And that was it.
No grand ending. No sudden fix. No perfectly solved distance between years. Just two people, lying awake in the same bed after too much time apart, holding onto each other like proof that none of it had been imaginary.
Eventually, my eyes drifted closed anyway.
Not because the waiting was over.
But because—for the first time in a very long time—it finally felt like it was okay not to be.
And beside me, Ryland didn’t sleep either.
But he stayed.
He had come back to me.
good morning. back to me pt 2 is ready…
It will be posted at 12:00 pm today
just to let you all know..this is how i felt writing the ending.
here’s a small peak into Back to Me pt. 2. I have written it all, just working on editing! Thank you all for your patience.
pt 2 of Back To Me is gonna take a while party people..just bear with me!!
Back to me.
pairing: ryland grace x afab!reader
description: ryland’s been gone for almost 22 years. From saving earth to saving Erid, he felt as if it was time to finally go back home. Back to you.
warning: ANGST. A LOt OF ANGST.
authors note: HIHIHI!! i’m in love with phm. i’ve been looking for an imagine like this..but have not seen one. So im writing it myself! I have spent HOURS on this and love it…but it will definitely need a part 2. Also in this we’re gonna say Ryland is around 25 when he got sent to space. okay? okay.
Years had passed since Ryland left for space. I never found anyone else; I still wore my ring. I stayed in our home, his things untouched, like a ghost of the life we had. For a long time, I held onto the hope that one day he’d come barreling back across the stars. But that hope was starting to fade.
I was 46 now. Most of my life had been spent mourning my husband. Then, two years ago, everything changed. Multiple rockets returned, carrying dozens of videos.
And somehow… I was granted access to watch them.
I didn’t open them right away. The files sat on the screen for hours, each one labeled with timestamps I didn’t understand. Numbers too large, too distant. My hands hovered over the keyboard, trembling in a way they hadn’t in years.
For so long, I had lived with silence.
No answers. No goodbye.
Just… gone.
And now, suddenly, there were dozens of him. I clicked the first video.
Static flickered across the screen before it stabilized. A dim, metallic room came into focus—walls I didn’t recognize, panels of strange instruments glowing softly in colors I couldn’t name. Then— Him.
Ryland.
He looked about the same. However, he had deep lines under his eyes, and eye bags heavily drooping. But it was him. Undeniably him.
I forgot how to breathe.
He stared into the camera for a moment, like he was gathering himself.
“Okay… if anyone’s seeing this,” he said, his voice rough, unfamiliar and yet exactly the same, “then I guess this worked.” A shaky laugh escaped him.
“Wow. I really didn’t think it would.” I pressed a hand to my mouth.
“Um… hi. My name is Ryland Grace. I’m a middle school science teacher from Earth- well, I was..and if this got back, then… then we might actually have a chance.” He glanced off to the side, like he was checking something; no, like he wasn’t alone.
My heart stuttered.
“I’ve been out here for… I don’t even know how long anymore. Long enough that I started talking to myself and thinking that was normal.” He smiled faintly. “Good news is, I’m not alone anymore. Which..is a sentence I never thought I’d say.”
Not alone?
The room seemed to hum around him, a low, steady vibration.
“I found… someone. Something. And I know how insane that sounds, but..” There was a sound then, a series of soft, musical tones—almost like notes being played on glass.
Ryland’s expression changed instantly.
He turned, eyes lighting up in a way I hadn’t seen in years. “Hey, buddy,” he said gently. “I’m almost done.” The sound came again, more deliberate this time. I leaned closer to the screen, my pulse roaring in my ears. Ryland looked back at the camera.
“I don’t know who’s going to see this,” he said quietly. “But if it’s you—” He stopped.
For the first time, his composure cracked.
“I’m sorry I never got to say goodbye.” Then the video ended.
The screen went black.
For a second, I didn’t move. I didn’t breathe. It felt like if I stayed perfectly still, maybe it wouldn’t be real..maybe I hadn’t just seen him, hadn’t just heard his voice after all these years.
But the silence in the room was too loud.
My hand slipped from my mouth, falling uselessly into my lap.
“No…” I whispered, though I didn’t even know what I was denying. The years? The video? The apology? A sharp breath hitched in my chest, and suddenly it was too much. I doubled over, a sound tearing out of me before I could stop it—raw, broken, nothing like the quiet grief I’d learned to live with. That grief had been dull, distant. Manageable.
This wasn’t. This was fresh. Open. Bleeding.
“You don’t get to do that,” I choked, my voice shaking. “You don’t get to just..appear like that and say sorry.”
Tears blurred my vision, but I didn’t wipe them away. I couldn’t. My whole body felt like it was unraveling, like every piece I’d carefully held together for years was finally giving out all at once. “I waited,” I said, louder now, the words breaking apart as they came. “I waited for you. Do you know how long I waited?”
The empty room didn’t answer.
His things were still there. Everywhere. The jacket slung over the back of the chair. The book he never finished on the nightstand. The stupid mug with the chipped handle he refused to throw away. All of it hit me at once.
“You said you’d come home,” I whispered, my voice collapsing. “You said..” But he hadn’t. Not really.
Not in words. Just in the way he’d looked at me before he left. Like he believed it. Like he needed me to believe it too.
Another sob ripped through me, harsher this time, and I pressed my hands to my face, as if I could hold myself together by force.
“I didn’t move on,” I admitted, the truth spilling out in pieces. “I couldn’t. I tried, I- God, I tried, but I couldn’t—” My breath stuttered, uneven, painful.
“I’m still yours.” The words hung there, fragile and devastating. Years of loneliness, of birthdays spent alone, of nights reaching across an empty bed, it all crashed over me at once, suffocating.
And the worst part?
He was alive. He had been alive this whole time. Somewhere out there, breathing, speaking, existing.,while I stayed here, stuck in the space he left behind.
A broken laugh slipped out through my tears.
“Not alone,” I murmured, the words from the video cutting deeper now. “You’re not alone.”
My chest tightened.
“Of course you’re not.” I dragged in a shaky breath, lifting my head just enough to look at the dark screen again. My reflection stared back at me; older, worn down, eyes red and shining.
For a long moment, I just stared.
Then, with trembling fingers, I reached for the keyboard again. “I hate you,” I whispered, even as my hand hovered over the next file.
But my voice cracked on the last word.
And I clicked play anyway.
The next video flickered on almost immediately.
Ryland was closer this time—too close, like he hadn’t bothered setting anything up properly. The angle was slightly off, his shoulder half in frame.
He looked… tired. Not just physically. Something deeper. Worn down in a way that made my chest ache.
“Uh,” he started, then stopped, dragging a hand over his face. “Okay. Right. This is..this is for you. My sweet girl. Or… it would be. If this ever gets back.” He let out a quiet breath, shaking his head slightly.
“I don’t actually know how much of this you know,” he admitted. “About how I got here, I mean.” His eyes lifted to the camera again, more serious now.
“I didn’t choose this.”
The words were steady, but there was something tight underneath them.
“They didn’t give me a chance to say goodbye. One minute I was arguing,” he huffed a small, disbelieving breath, “and the next thing I knew, I was waking up out here. I didn’t even remember your face at first.”
My heart dropped.
“I got it back,” he added quickly, like he couldn’t stand leaving it like that. “The memories, I mean. They came back. You came back.” His voice softened on that.
“But for a while there… you were just this feeling. Like something important was missing and I couldn’t figure out what it was.” He swallowed hard, looking away for a second before forcing himself back.
“I don’t know if that makes it better or worse,” he muttered.
A long pause.
“I would’ve said goodbye,” he said quietly. “If they’d let me. I would’ve told you everything. Or- okay, not everything, because I probably wouldn’t have been allowed to, but I would’ve tried.” A faint, sad smile. “You would’ve figured it out anyway. You always do.” His hand tightened slightly where it rested out of frame.
“I’m sorry you didn’t get that,” he continued. “I’m sorry the last thing you got from me was just… me disappearing.” His voice wavered, just a little.
“You didn’t deserve that. You didn’t deserve to be left wondering if I just, what, changed my mind? Ran off? God.” He shook his head. “I hate that. I hate that that might’ve been what it looked like.”He leaned back slightly, exhaling through his nose.
“I didn’t leave you,” he said, more firmly now. “Not by choice. Not ever.” Silence settled for a moment, heavy and full.
“But I still left you alone,” he added, quieter.
That one landed differently.
“I think about that a lot,” he went on. “About what it must’ve been like for you. Not knowing. Not having anything to hold onto except… what we had before.” His eyes softened. “Which, for the record, was pretty great.” A weak attempt at a smile.
It didn’t last. “I hope you found out the truth,” he said after a moment. “At least some version of it. You deserve that much.” His gaze drifted, then came back sharper; focused, like he’d made a decision.
“And I hope you didn’t let this stop your life.”
There it was again, but different now. Heavier. More conflicted.
“Not because I don’t want you to wait,” he admitted, voice low. “God, part of me really does. That part of me is selfish and stubborn and very, very attached to you.” A breath, uneven.
“But I don’t want what they did to me to take anything else from you, too.” He leaned forward slightly, closer to the camera.
“They already took my choice,” he said quietly. “I don’t want them to take yours.” My chest tightened painfully.
“So if you moved on… if you built a life, if you found someone who’s actually there for you,” his voice caught, but he pushed through it, “then I’m glad. I mean it.”
A long pause followed.
He looked like he didn’t even believe himself. “I just…” He shook his head a little, eyes dropping before lifting again. “I hope you’re happy. That’s..yeah. That’s the important part.” His hand lifted again, hovering like before, like he wanted to reach through the screen. “I remember you,” he said softly. “All of it. And I..”
His voice broke this time. He looked away, jaw tightening, then forced himself back.
“I love you,” he finished, quieter now. A breath.
“And I didn’t choose to leave you.” He held the camera’s gaze for a second longer..
Then the video cut.
“I didn’t choose to leave you.”
“I didn’t leave you.”
The words didn’t fade when the screen went black.
And somehow, that hurt even more. black.
They stayed, echoing, repeating, embedding themselves somewhere deep in my chest where they hurt the most. For a second, I just sat there, staring at my reflection again.
Then my head shook..once, twice, harder each time. “No,” I whispered. My voice cracked on it.“No, no-“
I pushed back from the desk so suddenly the chair scraped harshly against the floor. My hands went to my head, fingers tangling in my hair like I could pull the thoughts out before they settled.“He didn’t leave,” I said, louder now. “He didn’t—he didn’t leave me.”
The room felt too small. Too tight. Like the walls were closing in with every breath I tried to take.“They took him.” The words came out shaking.
“They took him and I just..what? I just sat here?”My chest heaved, breaths coming too fast, too uneven. “I thought you left,” I choked, pacing now, back and forth like I couldn’t stop moving. “I thought.. you didn’t fight for me, you didn’t try to come back, you just..” My voice broke completely.
“But you didn’t even get a choice.” That realization hit like a physical blow. All those nights. All those thoughts I tried to bury; why wasn’t I enough? why didn’t he come back? why didn’t he choose me?
They twisted into something else entirely.
Something worse.
“I was mad at you,” I whispered, horrified. “I was-” A sob tore through me, sudden and violent. “I was angry at you for leaving me when you didn’t even-” I couldn’t finish it, my voice collapsing under the weight of it. “You didn’t even get to stay.” My knees gave out, and I sank to the floor, barely catching myself with shaking hands.
“They just took you,” I said again, quieter now, but no less broken. “They just took you away from me like you were nothing.” My hands curled into fists against the floor.
“That’s not fair,” I said, the words trembling. “That’s not.. you don’t get to just decide that for someone. You don’t get to decide that for us. Anger flared, hot and sudden, cutting through the grief.
“They didn’t ask me,” I said, voice rising again. “They didn’t ask you, they didn’t ask either of us..they just- what, decided you were expendable? That your life was theirs to take?” I laughed, sharp and bitter.
“Early coma,” I muttered, the phrase tasting wrong in my mouth. “Like that makes it better. Like that makes it okay.”
It didn’t.
It made it worse.
“They stole years,” I said, tears falling freely now. “From you. From me. From us.” My gaze dragged back up to the dark screen, as if I could force it to come back on, force him to keep talking.
“You didn’t leave me,” I whispered. The anger cracked again, breaking open into something softer. More fragile.
“I thought you did,” I admitted, voice barely there. “For so long, I thought you did.” My hand lifted, pressing flat against the screen.
Like I could reach him now that I knew.
“I’m sorry,” I breathed. Another sob hit, quieter this time, but deeper.
“I’m so sorry I thought that about you.” Silence filled the room again, heavy and suffocating. But it felt different now. Because the space he left behind..
It wasn’t empty anymore. It was taken.
And somehow, that hurt even more.
My fingers trembled as they hovered over the next file. I hesitated.
After everything—after what I’d just seen, just learned..I wasn’t sure I could take another video. Not if it was more apologies. More distance. More reminders of everything we’d lost.
But it was him. And for the first time in years… he wasn’t gone.
So I clicked play, and the video opened brighter. Not dark and heavy like the others—this one had more light, softer somehow. Ryland was already in frame, but this time he wasn’t sitting still.
He was laughing. Actually laughing. I froze.
It wasn’t strained or quiet or forced like before, it was full, surprised, the kind of laugh that slipped out before you could stop it.
“Oh my god, you did that on purpose,” he said, looking off to the side. A series of soft, musical tones answered him—playful, almost teasing. My breath caught.
Ryland shook his head, still smiling in a way that made him look younger, like the years hadn’t worn him down quite so much in this moment.
“That is not fair,” he continued, pointing accusingly at whatever, or whoever, was off camera. “You can’t just drop that on me without warning.” The tones came again, a little faster this time. He huffed out another laugh, running a hand through his hair. “Yeah, yeah, very funny,” he muttered, but there was no bite to it. Only warmth.
He turned back toward the camera then, like he’d just remembered it was recording. “Oh! uh, hi,” he said, a little sheepish now. “Didn’t realize this was still on.” He glanced back again, softer this time.“It’s okay,” he said gently, like he was reassuring someone. “I’m just talking.”
Something about the way he said it.. my chest tightened, but not the same way as before.
This didn’t hurt. Not entirely. It ached. Because he wasn’t alone. And somehow… that mattered.
A lot.
Ryland looked back at the camera, a small smile still lingering. “So, uh,” he started, shifting slightly. “Update, I guess. I didn’t completely lose my mind out here, which..honestly, feels like a win.” Another soft series of tones.He grinned.
“Okay, mostly didn’t lose my mind,” he corrected.
I let out a shaky breath—something dangerously close to a laugh slipping through it.
God, I hadn’t heard him like this in so long.
“I made a friend,” he said after a moment. The words were simple, but they landed gently, instead of breaking me apart.
“He’s…” Ryland paused, like he was trying to find the right way to explain something impossible. “Different. Very different. But he’s—he’s good. Really good.” The tones came again, softer now.
Ryland’s expression softened with them. “He saved my life,” he added quietly. “More than once, actually.”
My eyes burned again, but this time it wasn’t just grief..It was something else.
Relief.
“He’s kind of terrible at personal space,” Ryland went on, a faint smirk tugging at his lips. “And communication is… a whole process. But we’re figuring it out.” Another pause.
Then, more quietly, “I think you’d like him.” That did it. A tear slipped down my cheek before I could stop it. Not sharp. Not breaking.
Just… there. Because for the first time since opening the videos.. I wasn’t picturing him alone.
Ryland leaned back slightly, more relaxed than I’d seen him yet. “It’s weird,” he admitted. “I spent so long thinking I was completely by myself out here. And now…” He shook his head a little, smiling. “Now it’s not so bad.” The tones chimed again, softer, almost fond.
He glanced over, and the look on his face, It wasn’t just survival anymore.
It was connection. Real, genuine connection. And somehow, that made the distance between us feel just a little smaller.
Ryland looked back at the camera one last time.
“I’m okay,” he said.
Two simple words. But they settled into my chest like something warm.
“I’m… actually okay.”
The video ended.
I didn’t move right away.
But this time.. I wasn’t breaking. I wiped at my face, letting out a slow, unsteady breath.
“Good,” I whispered to the empty room. My voice still shook. But there was something new in it now.
Something that hadn’t been there before.
“Good… I’m glad you’re not alone.” My gaze drifted back to the list of videos.
There were still so many. And for the first time..
I wasn’t afraid to press play.
I didn’t hesitate. I clicked the next video before i could second guess it.
Ryland appeared almost immediately, pacing this time. Not nervous pacing, focused. Restless in a way that meant his brain was moving faster than his body could keep up.
“Okay, okay, this might actually work,” he was saying, half to himself, half to the camera. “Like, I’m not saying it will, but it’s not completely impossible anymore, which is..honestly that’s huge.”
My heart skipped.
He ran a hand through his hair, turning sharply and pointing off-screen. “No, seriously, your part of this? Genius. Absolute genius,” he said, a grin breaking through. “I’m still mad about how long it took me to catch up, but I’ll admit it. You were right.” A series of soft tones answered him.
He huffed out a laugh. “Yeah, yeah, don’t get smug about it.” Then he stopped pacing.
Actually stopped. And looked straight at the camera.
Something shifted in his expression. “This… isn’t just about fixing the problem anymore,” he said, quieter now. “I mean, it is. That’s still the priority. But..” He hesitated. Like he wasn’t sure he should say the next part out loud.
“But there’s a way back,” he admitted.
The words hit me all at once. Not a theory. Not a dream.
A way.
“I don’t know how long it would take,” he continued quickly. “Years, probably. A lot of things would have to go right. Like… a lot. And I’m very aware that my track record with ‘things going right’ is not exactly stellar.” A faint, self-aware smile. It didn’t quite hide the hope underneath.
“But it’s possible,” he said again, softer this time. “We’ve been running the numbers, going over it again and again, and it’s not just wishful thinking. It’s..” he exhaled, almost disbelieving, “..it’s real.” Another quiet series of tones. Ryland glanced over, nodding slightly.
“I know, I know,” he said. “I’m trying not to get ahead of myself.” But he already was.
I could see it.
The way his shoulders had straightened. The way his eyes kept flicking back to the camera, like he couldn’t quite stop himself from imagining who might be watching.
Me.
“If I try this,” he said slowly, “there’s a chance I don’t make it back at all. The margin for error is… not great.” My chest tightened. “But if I don’t try…” He shook his head. “Then this is it.”
A long pause.
“I don’t want this to be it.” His voice was quieter now. More honest. “I don’t want the last version of me you ever knew to be the one who just… disappeared.”
My breath caught.
“I didn’t get to choose leaving,” he continued, eyes steady on the camera. “But I can choose this.” That landed differently.
Stronger.
“I can choose to try to come back.”
The room felt impossibly still.
“I don’t know if you’re still there,” he said after a moment. “I don’t know what your life looks like now, or if there’s even a place for me in it anymore.” His voice softened, but didn’t break.
“But I want the chance to find out.”
Another pause.
Then, quieter, “I want the chance to see you again.”
Everything in my chest twisted at once.
Ryland let out a slow breath, some of that tension easing just slightly. “So yeah,” he said, a small, almost nervous smile forming. “That’s the plan. Or… the potential plan. Still working out some details. Still a lot that could go wrong.” A soft series of tones. “But it’s worth it.” No hesitation this time. No doubt.
“Even if it doesn’t work,” he added, “I’d rather try than spend the rest of my life wondering if I could’ve made it back to you.” His gaze held steady, like he was speaking to someone he could almost see. “I think you’d understand that.” The corners of his mouth lifted just slightly. “I hope you would.” Another quiet beat.
Then, softer, “I’m coming home,” he said.
Not I’ll try.
Not maybe.
“I’m coming home.”
The video ended.
I hadn’t realized I was crying again until a tear hit my hand. But this time…
I was smiling. Just barely. Shaking, uneven, terrified of what it meant to believe it.
But smiling.
“You better,” I whispered to the empty room. My voice cracked, but it held.
“You better come home.”
boy fuck you and your genius brain and those big ass biceps and your pretty smile i’m irritated
I may or may not be writing a Ryland Grace imagine about him coming back to earth….
markiplier lost backstage at the oscars:
your camera roll if you were in a relationship with mason thames <3
an: HI GUYSSS. guess who’s back🕺 i’ve been so mia from this app for almost 2 years good LAWD but I’m back with big ass celeb crushes on new people and you all WILL be hearing about it.
say hello to the new white boy of the month
girls will say “this healed me” and it’s just pedro pascal’s massive biceps on jimmy kimmel
Joel Miller running a construction company. HOT