Why Mediocrity Wins Over Passion
The Battle Within â Whoâs Winning?
Long time ago a friend of mine had frustratingly blurted out âWhy do most people want to remain mediocre?â
And that question has been very irritatingly pricking the back of my mind ever since. While I remember defending the so-called âmediocreâ people then by saying maybe most people donot know the greener pastures beyond, maybe the demon of passion has not awakened in most people, maybeâŠ.
The moment passed but my brain has been restless ever since. As long as I can remember, I have been quite intolerant of inefficiencies, âsettlingâ for anything less than exceptional â I remember my bosses telling me that my benchmark is very high and I perhaps need to lower my bar. And my response was that if somebody is holding a particular position (including me), s/he better live up to excelling in that position otherwise they better make way for others.
The idea of just doing enough or lowering the bar never occurred to me. Years later when I quit my job to rediscover my career into something I love, I felt so much more fulfilled and meaningful about my work but that excelling part of me started thinking perhaps I need to look at defining excellence in my current role. And then this other voice within me tells me âYou have just rediscovered your career. If you wanted to run the rat race, you would better have remained where you wereâ. And that was the voice that told me to take things easy. That was the voice that told me that I deserve to ease off after all the hard work I had done. I had paid my dues and now is my turn to sit back and relax. Be happy with a few clients (that I have chosen and that I want to work with) and make small changes â one step at a time!
And hello, hello, I was right then and there introduced to my mediocre self while my passionate self was still waking up.
By now if you are jumping or itching to jump to the defence of my âmediocreâ self, hold on for some more time until you finish reading the rest of the article.
All of us have 2 identities â the mediocre self and the passionate self. Here, I want to redefine passion.
Passion is not just high energy or barely controlled emotion, it is actually the willingness to suffer for that something/someone that we are passionate about.
So, what is the difference between the two selves?
The mediocre self wants the usual things â comfort, happiness, family and friends around while the passionate self also wants the usual things â live life unfettered, wants to unwrap the gift and unleash that on the world, not restricted to family and friends.
The mediocre self says I donot want much, I just want to be happy; The passionate self says I want all of myself (100%) and I want to make a difference.
The mediocre self says I just want you to be a good person and a good parent; The passionate self says you are more than a good person and a good parent, I want you to excel in your role on earth in its full form.
The mediocre self says I want your dreams to be realistic, I am afraid you will disrupt the âgoodâ thing going on; The passionate self says I want your dreams to justify your gift, I am not afraid of disruption in the process.
The mediocre self says I donot want you to be disappointed, I will watch out for you and protect you against disappointment, play small; The passionate self says there is nothing called disappointment, I want the light within you to shine bright, I want the music within you to be loud, play big, donât be afraid.
The mediocre self says I am afraid of suffering, but our world of mediocrity is so crowded that we are bursting at the seams, we will have to find a way to breathe in this super crowded place; The passionate self says I am not afraid to take suffering head on, our world is spacious and elitist and there is joy.
The mediocre self says Look at me and stay with me, I will try to give you happiness; The passionate self says Itâs your choice â if you choose me, I will give you fulfillment, joy and peace.
This tug of war between our mediocre selves and our passionate selves is what creates the frustration and the so-called âmid lifeâ crisis â thatâs when the passionate self is stirring and waking up after years of domination by the mediocre self.
But sadly, most times we still succumb to the mediocre self because it is loud and promises no pain (though it does not necessarily deliver on it). Remember passion means the âwillingness to sufferâ and the mediocre self says âIs it really worth it? Why not just remain small and die small? What difference will it make?â
And thatâs the question that we all need to answer â what difference will I make if I breathe oxygen into my own fire that is called passion?
I am curious, who is playing a larger role in your life at this momentâŠ.
The biggest myth is that the mediocre self provides for less(er) suffering, less(er) pain than the passionate self. What is true?
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As an entrepreneur and an executive coach with 2 ventures (Progress-U and 6point14), I work with senior leadership, top notch sales professionals and aspiring (& inspiring) women. I enjoy the regular exchange of ideas â do connect with me with your thoughts as well.