Part of him was thankful that Mark had defused the erotically-charged mood with talk of the more serious logistics of their relationship, because who knows how far things would have gone, and it would all have been way too fast, and… certainly not here, not right now, at work, in Mark’s office… but then, another part of him wondered how far indeed things would’ve gone, and he lamented that missed opportunity never to be regained, because dammit he would have wanted to have seen just how far things could go, and it gave him a perverse high to think of Mark taking him roughly, right there and then in his office… their colleagues milling about outside, completely oblivious to their escapades (or would they hear enough to be able to intuit everything?)…
He had enough self-respect and a strong enough moral sense, however, that he would refuse to be Mark’s accomplice in cheating on his wife, regardless of his feelings for the man. It was one thing if Mark was getting divorced or something in that vein; quite another completely if he was a lying, cheating philanderer (which Adrian had thought would have been severely out of character for the ever-so-stalwart and upright General Naird)…
And so he was once more awash with relief and gratitude for the funny way things worked out sometimes, favourably for him in this case… of course, why hadn’t the thought occurred to him before? Mark and his wife had decided on an open relationship! To hear that Mark still loved his wife very much was no deterrent to Adrian; he was not so selfish (or naïve) as to think he could replace Maggie, and to be able to have even a minuscule fraction of Mark’s love and affection (until now, an impossibility in his mind) would have been enough.
Hearing Mark confess awkwardly to ‘really liking’ him… that was enough for his heart.
Because he could never resist the opportunity to banter with Mark: “So, what are you saying — you’re stupid for liking me?” he joked, faux-offended, hand on chest in a dramatic gesture… but then noticing just how scared Mark was, he decided to tone it down. “Sorry, that was, um, insensitive.” Mark was confessing his love for Adrian, goddammit — this was certainly no time to joke around or make light of the poor man’s feelings when he was pouring his heart out to Adrian, laying himself bare and vulnerable… surely not an easy feat, Adrian knew, for the repressed fool that was the general. Just remembering the lunar habitat experiment, he knew exactly how Mark dealt with his feelings, and it wasn’t a pretty sight. (But then, who was he to judge, having buried his own feelings towards Mark for so long?)
He laid a hand on Mark’s knee and squeezed a little, hoping it served as a comfort, and looked at Mark with unfiltered earnestness in his eyes. “I really like you too, Mark.”
For Mark, the joke didn’t fly. For a split second he was ready to jump down the line of apologies, begging for forgiveness—‘no, that’s not what I meant.’ Thankfully, Adrian quickly shut that down. It didn’t at all read as a joke or tease for the General as he was too high strung for it. Feeling terrified, scared—mostly worried about what this will do to them or the base. How will everyone deal if there is an unidentified pressure between them? What if people start talking? Everything was scary and different.
As the hand goes down on Mark’s knee, he almost melts under the warm touch. Eyes light up at the other man’s words, double-taking this isn’t some dream about to turn into a nightmare. No, this was real. He and Adrian are really doing this. Naird smiles, ever so softly at first. Trying not to break out into a toothy grin.
Before he goes on another line of buffoonery about just over the moon he is right now, Mark leans in and pecks Adrian’s lips again, gently. He let’s go of where his hand rested on the scientist’s nape, puts it back by his side, and gives some distance between them—looking at the other man with an evaluating look.
The sudden overridden feeling of indifference was stronger than any concern for possible professionalism. He didn’t care—this was just for them. They could manage it, they could do whatever they want after work and stay appropriate… It didn’t mean anybody was going to go awry. They could make this good. They…possibly loved each other, for fuck’s sake. While Mark was still scared about admitting that and will be for an unforeseeable future, this was the still fact. He felt strongly and warmly about Mallory, and he was going to do this right.
❝Then we should do something about it, right? ❞ He begins, tone low. Then a grin braces his features for a split second as he fights it back. Clears his throat, still overjoyed. ❝Are you free tonight? ❞
This might be giving the wrong ideas to the other, but Mark was just so excited! He needed to sort himself out, make plans, get himself and Adrian to a nice place, and most importantly – not rush it. He wanted to take his time with him. Wanted to do absolutely everything right. Ignoring all the wrong he was currently doing. But that could be forgiven, after all. Because as of currently he felt like an overly active puppy ready to pounce, which he needed to calm down from. Dinner first, then see how things play out and hope for the best.
Maybe, just maybe, this could be for good.
