Mental health awareness
So, I know it's late in the day when I've decided to write about this day but it still counts. I am currently fighting an on going battle with my mental health and recently the bad days have outweighed the good. I have recently been struggling to find a reason to get out of bed and do things, but I also struggle to sleep. I have made myself speak to people and socialise because I'm starting to feel like I'm in a locked box that is gradually getting smaller and smaller, so I need to keep in contact with the outside world in order to keep the walls from closing in. But this seems to be the only place where I can vent all these feelings. It's hard to explain feeling surrounded by family and few friends but still feeling so alone and stranded, like you're slowly sinking through sand and you're only just holding on to the rope held by the close loved ones who still bother to check in and make sure you're Okay. And in brief moments toying with the idea of what it would be like to just let go. Would I feel better if I just let go and continued to fall through this bottomless pit of sand? Would it be better to clutch that rope with both hands and try to climb back to safe ground? At this moment in time I can't answer those questions, but as I started this post I stated that this is an on going battle and I hope one day I'll be able to answer these questions. But for now I'll just keep my grip on that rope and hope I don't sink much further.
