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"I am so dumb."

Okay, but like the first (and even like the second, third, you can go on) listen to “Marvin Hits Trina,” you’re so up in arms with a deep satisfaction that Whizzer and Trina are finally calling Marvin on his bullshit (We had fights and games / Marvin called us funny names / Marvin always played the clown) and then shock and anger at Marvin for freaking out and hitting Trina. And I’m not trying to justify Marvin’s freak out - it was completely inappropriate. But like, the “I am so dumb” declaration is one of the most important lines of the entire show - especially for Marvin’s development as a character.

He isn’t /just/ freaking out because of the dissipation of a future that he naively envisioned (a tight-knit family, an ex-wife and lover and son that blindly adored him, making a male housewife out of Whizzer)…

He’s freaking out also because of what Whizzer said and what that means for his previous actions and sacrifices.

Whizzer says, “Do I love him? No.”

And that devastates Marvin. Because if that were true, then that meant Marvin would have to accept that all he did - leave his wife, alienate his kid, tear apart his family - was for nothing.

It’s clear that Marvin loved Whizzer because he gave up everything for him. And it was in that moment that Marvin realized:

It was all for /nothing/. Whizzer didn’t love him. Like, his entire life is falling apart - and also, he now believes that he ruined his life and isolated himself from his family all for a guy that he loved but didn’t love him back (allegedly, of course).

Marvin says, “I am so dumb.” It’s so significant because throughout the musical, Marvin constantly bragged about being so smart and successful. Even in most of “Marvin Hits Trina,” Marvin is still bragging about himself (accusing Trina of “ruining his seed,” of trying to “make him look bad,” and essentially telling her that he did treat her well with the lyric “how could you ever deny what we had?”). But it takes Whizzer - someone who Marvin dehumanizes and calls stupid and who he obviously thinks is below him - to first knock him down by beating him at chese and then to destroy him further with one word: “[Do I love him?] No.”

Marvin finally feels dumb because now he thinks that Whizzer never loved him, that he threw his life away for a man who truly did not give two shits about him.

That part is so heartbreaking because it’s the peak of Marvin’s character development - Whizzer finally makes him stop blinding himself with all these self-praises and blaming other people for his mistakes in order to soothe his ego by tearing him down with a truth that Marvin had refused to ever accept.

Because if Whizzer didn’t love him, then that meant that Marvin would have to admit that he’s not so smart and desired and deserving of love. He’s “so dumb.” And that’s what makes him freak out. He let himself love and give up everything for someone who never cared, and it’s such a devastating blow to his self-esteem. He’s been “tricked” by some stupid tramp of man - someone that he thought he could always dominate and force his will upon.

I don’t know. It’s the best part of the first act - especially for Marvin as a character. I feel like that was the moment he stopped bullshitting himself and learned to face a very clear fact that everyone knew since the beginning:

Marvin /is/ so dumb.

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meanest and thinnest of the first ladies

i love this musical so much

tennesseewillams

endless list of favorite characters: 5/?

trina; falsettos by william finn and james lapine

Holding to the ground As the ground keeps shifting Trying to keep sane As the rules keep changing Keeping up my head As my heart falls out of sight Everything will be all right Everything will be all right

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sleepy

> rb’s better than likes

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roses are red

violets are blue

there are no answers

but what would I do

broadwaykillsme-blog

Too much cute for me to handle so early omg

a-lesbian-from-next-door-too

this is the single most powerful exchange in all of In Trousers

caduceus-tealeaf

*stands on top of a mountain screaming about Marvin’s character development*

astrronomer

Four men swaying in phosphorescence Keep replaying their adolescence

andrewrannellsdeservesatony

if you start the falsettos soundtrack at exactly 10:16:11 on New Year’s Eve, whizzer will fall during more racquetball at exactly midnight.

start your new year off sobbing

havenireland

moodboard

thanks-tomhanks-deactivated2018

Reblog if

You’re at your best friend Nicole’s house, choreographing a hiphop routine when your mother calls you to come home, so you finish the dance and Nicole drops you off at home in her infiniti SUV and you walk in to you pitch black house and you see your mothers backlit shadow in the corner of the kitchen and takes you to the family computer and instead of going “lets talk about it” she opens up every gay porn website and you go “eww that’s disgusting”, but really you’re going “Yep tuesday, wednesday, thursday, I didn’t do anything and friday”. Then, your father in his tighty wities comes down and goes “if it’s yours, just tell us” but wait, there’s more, they found a weird fax, like a document, that nobody recognised and you say “Well obviously someone hacked into our computer” and they believed you

adamsacklerrights

The Most Important Story

I came out to my parents when they discovered gay porn on my computer while I was at my friend Nicole’s house choreographing a hip hop dance.

I was shocked because I thought they already knew but, I got a call when I was like, mid shoulder-brush, from my mother being like, “Where are you?” and I was like “I’m at Nicole’s house!” and she was like, “You need to come home now.” And I went home.

I can’t believe i’m telling this story.

Anyway, I went home after we finished the dance.

She drove me home in her Infiniti SUV and I walked into the house and it’s pitch black, and I just see the like back-lit shadow of my mother in the corner of the kitchen just like…

She brings me down and rather than having a nice “let’s talk about this”, she starts like bringing up, she starts like opening up all the websites and I don’t know what to do and I’m like: “Ew what is that? That’s disgusting!”

Meanwhile I’m like: “Yep Tuesday, yep Wednesday, Thursday I didn’t do anything, and Friday.”

And like my dad comes downstairs in his tighty-whiteys and is like “Bran, If it’s yours, just tell us.”

Well, hold on, hold on.

They found this like weird fax, like a document nobody recognized and I was like:

“Well, obviously someone hacked into our computer!”

And they believed me.