I wrote this at four in the morning so if it's not four in the morning when you're reading this then I might suggest you don't
It's four am. I'm watching this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qj3JZ6N9Be8&feature=share&list=UUVpankR4HtoAVtYnFDUieYA
I've written about 6 private tumblers, and cried and ate a lot while watching, 'The Dead Poets Society' (I still have no idea how you're supposed to properly punctuate the titles of various things on various mediums, so today I went with the noncommittal quotation)
I'm sitting in my cold living room that no longer has furniture, but does have two alien species which (I also don't know if I should use who, which, or that. DGAF) resemble felines. They like to climb in the cabinets and knock stuff onto floor and then take huge poops in their box that stink up the whole apartment.
I don't understand how people can handle excessive drinking at my age cause I can hardly manage the impulses of my sober mind. Like the impulse to leave my bedroom window that's on the second floor with no screen open and just see if I end up with to cats at the end of the day. That's horrible.
I've had about 7 of these Whole Wheat Raspberry Bars, they are basically Fig Newtons that got punched in the face with fiber, they kinda suck. I suck at dieting, and portion control, and routines for that matter. Maybe I'll just eat nothing but soup for the next couple weeks. That will probably last till about an hour past breakfast tomorrow, but hey why not!
I'm moving in just over two weeks. I have no idea what I'm going to do cause most likely I'll be there for a couple of months and then it's time to go again. I've spent most of this year going. And I'm someone who likes going, but it can suck sometimes when you are doing it by yourself. Especially when you have self-discipline like mine because I think I've missed out on some pretty epic nomadic moments by deciding that I'd rather watch and movie and eat a box of wheat thins then just deal with the somewhat startling realize that I am on my own. Instead of just embracing the aloneness. Being fully at the mercy of yourself is a real thing. What I eat, read, watch, do, wear and with or without whom is all up to me. And I don't know who decided I was capable of making these kinds of executive decisions, but they were wrong. I'm joking, but not really. There are so many questions that I have and some that I can't quite put into words and I wish I could just explore the questions, but still come home to comfort like I did as a child. However, I forget all that comfort also grew to be suffocating, but exploration can just be cold and full of cats.
That's all I got right meow, but hopefully I can get somewhere with this. Discomfort usually leads to growth and this tumblr post is super long so obviously I is gotted less stupider.
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amandla
theartofmadeline
turnnoffyourmind
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