people don’t consider enough how fucking devastating mary winchester’s story is.
growing up in a secretive, isolated lifestyle based around violence for the greater good. dreaming your entire life to escape and live a normal, safe life. meeting this guy, who was secretly sent by heaven as a grand plan, and realising escaping is possible. just as you are about to be free forever, God’s plan drops your future son on your doorstep with revelations you can’t grasp. during that very visit, the demon that is destined to kill you and change your families life violently kills your mother and now-fiancé and possesses your now-dead father. the only way to still escape the life for good is to make a deal with this demon and bring John back, not knowing this is still all of heaven’s grand plans. your fiancé comes back to life, the demon tells you he will pay you a visit in a decade with no specified date or reason, and you’re free. you spend the next few years living a normal, safe life and have two sons. on the night of your youngest’s 6 month birthday, you awaken to his cries. you notice strange happenings in the house, but ignore it. you walk in to see your kid being fed by his father, before quickly realising your husband is downstairs and it’s the demon back for his side of the deal. as the safe life you built crumbles down, you run to save your baby just to be burned alive. you were 29 years old.
you spend 33 years in heaven, then suddenly in God’s great plans, you’re put back on earth. you’re greeted by your eldest son, who is now older than you, not the 4 year old you were just with in heaven. you come to learn the very life you escaped from was destined for your children even in all the ways you kept them safe, and the very person who raised them in that life was the man you saved to help you escape in the first place. within seconds, you realise escaping was for nothing, your sons are older and been through far more than you and your loving husband became a relentless hunter and a figure of a monster himself to avenge you.
furthering that, your youngest son is tortured, and you come back to witnessing that. every part of the hunting life has changed from when you were in the life, no more door to door asking, new monsters, new weapons. you could work to get a world free of monsters so once and for all you and your family, and so many others, are safe. you’re hated for doing so because even though your son who was tortured also worked with them for the same goal, you’re seen as betraying your family once again. then once you finally realise a world without monsters isn’t possible whilst God is running the show, you begin to accept and find a rhythm balancing your life wants with your responsibilities as a person, mother and hunter. once you find that rhythm, you get murdered on accident by God’s grandson, somebody you considered your own kid.
just what a tragic violent life. raised in violence, escaping by saving the life of the man you love, just to die for that very choice and come back to your sons being older than you and raised in the violent life you were trying to escape from by the very man you saved to make it possible, all this to just to not be able to save your sons or yourself over and over and over again.
