kafkamatt Happy birthday my love
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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@mattrusso
kafkamatt Happy birthday my love
@mattrusso
Knocking on the door with a massive bag of food and a fresh bag of weed from D - Ivy waited for Matt to answer the door and raised a brow at him when he did. “Seriously dude. I thought you knew better than getting into stupid fights.. But.. Here’s your chorizo tacos.. I mean some in there are for me. But.. You asked and I brought … So now..” she slapped his arm. “You fucking got into a fight?! Are you stupid?!”
It wasn’t the first time Matt had done something stupid that had put him in the hospital, although to be fair it was usually stunts pulled on stage and other bad decisions that had less to do with other people and more to do with his recklessness. He was ready for the berating he received the second he opened the door on Ivy -- sometimes he wondered how he’d managed to escape his parents in New Jersey and find a new one in LA, but she was one of his close friends and he usually allowed her to mom him to a certain degree as long as it didn’t go too far. “I don’t understand what the big deal is,” he said, grabbing the food and closing the door behind her. “It’s a broken nose, it’ll heal. Wasn’t trending on Twitter, literally no one other than you and Mia give a shit and she only cares because I’m incapable of going down on her until it’s healed.” He shot her a goofy, sarcastic face before heading off to the TV room where he dropped the food on the coffee table beside a two-foot bong. “Plus I can still hit that thing,” he said, gesturing to it, “so all’s good.”
kylisms
“I am,” he confirmed with a defeatist tone and again, “I am.” But his gaze refused to meet the other and instead found comfort in the table becoming his default place to look, stare, talk to. Something of the sort. “I’m supposed to be. It’s not easy to be funny when everything hurts so damn much.” Another sigh. “I don’t think Lucie wanted me to be a comedian. I know her parents sure as hell didn’t.” And cue the need for alcohol. The needy reach Kyle made for the bottle could have almost been described as pathetic. Almost. “Don’t get me wrong she wanted me to be happy but,” Kyle gave a slight raise of his brows, a tell that there was more to that story, just before he was forced into silence when his lips met the bottle. “Being a pilot, now that was a steady career. God, her parents loved that one. I loved it too for awhile.” Again, he hushed himself with another swig of beer which left little in the bottle he set down in front of him, just within reach. It seemed to be the only thing that helped Kyle admit the things he didn’t want to, and to a presumed stranger at that. It almost made it easier. “I was. google divorce rates in the states,” right before Matt became the person Kyle was going to share all of his problems with that is. “39…might as well just say 40% and I never wanted to be part of that statistic. One and done.That’s what it was supposed to be. Then she runs off to Seattle and now I feel like I’m just waiting for papers in the mail.”
Matt truly had not expected what Kyle unloaded on him, but he seemed to be at that point some people got to where you’d held onto it so long you spilled to the first person you saw. Clearly he was in pain, and normally Matt wasn’t the ideal candidate for a sympathetic audience, but he quieted at Kyle’s admission and listened as he continued, knowing firsthand he was right about Lucie’s parents and feeling almost intrusive at the same time because of his history with her. “That’s, uh...that’s some big stuff,” Matt said with a laugh, not because he found the situation funny but because that was how he dealt with things. “I mean, for what it’s worth, I’ve known Lucie, like...my whole life, man. Most of it, anyway. And regardless of her parents, she’s not really the type to...y’know, judge or whatever. If you’re happy being a comedian, she’s not gonna get down on you about that.” Given he hadn’t known Lucie for much of their adult lives and he supposed people changed, but he doubted it. “Not that I know what went down between you two, I just think it seems unlike her to have let that come between you if you’re married and everything. Has she even, like, said anything about divorce or are you extrapolating? Because I might not be the relationship expert but I do know it’s dangerous as hell to assume things and get emotional about them before, like, anything’s actually happened, know what I mean?”
lucie-armstrong
Matt wasn’t the person Lucie was expecting to bump into at Book Nook. She also wasn’t expecting to spend the afternoon learning about historical whaling, but she supposed that things didn’t always quite work out how you expected them to. Although she probably should’ve guessed it from Matt; he’d been like it since they were children.
“That is-… Wow, Matt,” Lucie replied, pausing for a moment. She wasn’t exactly sure how one was expected to respond to such a fact. “That is quite mad. But I really just wanted to know whether I really needed to buy another candle. Not how they were made years ago. But thanks for that.” She gave a soft laugh.
Matt rolled his eyes, though not unkindly. A decent majority of people weren’t terribly interested in the random facts he liked to spew out at them nor the philosophizing that went along with it, but he’d known Lucie so long it was habit to do it anyway. “You’re welcome,” he said, flashing her a shit-eating grin. “You should know the history of what you’re buying before you buy it, even if your candles aren’t gonna be made of whale fat. Anyway what are you doing, having a séance? Just get more, who doesn’t love a million candles? The fire hazard is my favorite part.”
emiliasmr
Having gone pretty much straight from the hotel to her parents’ house, they hadn’t had a lot of time to look around Beacon Hill yet, but she was more than happy to show him the streets where she’d run around as a kid. The fascinated excitement on his face was so sweet to her, and she couldn’t stop smiling. “You should see it around Christmas, everything’s straight out of some Hallmark movie. I think that’s what I miss the most about living here.” At least she usually came back home for the holidays, which had only given her a newfound appreciation for the neighborhood. The summer in Boston wasn’t too bad either, and getting to share it with Matt only made it better. She laughed as he mentioned Newark, wrapping an arm around his waist when his went across her shoulders. “I’ve literally never been so I’m actually excited to see your ugly hometown. It better be as bad as you say, or I’m gonna be really disappointed.” She was mostly being sarcastic, but despite all of Matt’s warnings she was still genuinely excited to see where he grew up and even meet his parents, horrible as they apparently were.
“Don’t know why you’d assume I smoked weed,” she said with a joking pout as she steered them around a street corner and toward the river. “We’d actually just sit in our backyard a lot whenever my parents were at the restaurant all night. Or we’d hang out on the esplanade. If you go at night it’s really quiet and no one really bothers you. Guess I’m gonna show you.” It was already part of the plan for where they were headed, but having the added memories of going there as a teenager definitely only made it better, even if it was the wrong time of day to be fully authentic. Though with Matt being Matt, she was sure he at least had some weed on him, so that was good enough. “I’ll take you to the frog pond too on the way back. I hung out there a lot, and I ran around chasing frogs all the time as a kid, so we should do that. My mom’s literally gonna kill me if I start bringing frogs home again, but it’d be totally worth it.”
“My mistake,” Matt said dryly, “I forgot you are and always have been straight edge.” He might have believed Mia hadn’t smoked weed when she was in high school, at least, but her little pout made him positive that wasn’t the case. He tried to imagine her back then, fresh-faced and seventeen and hanging out with her friends by the river at night, and the funny thing was that he could picture it perfectly. It wasn’t actually that different than the Mia he knew now, who was not unlike a teenager still in all of her uninhibited effervescence and shameless fangirling. Maybe that was why the revelation that she used to bring frogs home against her mom’s wishes didn’t surprise him in the slightest. “God, of course you did,” he said with a roll of his eyes, ruined by his grin. “Did you try to kiss them too? At least they don’t sting, I guess.”
When they got to the river’s edge they found the esplanade about as crowded as he’d imagined it would be, so they started off around the perimeter instead, the whole thing as beautiful and picturesque as her neighborhood. And, choosing a tree near the water where it was a little quieter, he pulled her over to sit down beneath it on the grass. “Why did you move?” he asked as he pulled out a joint, probably not the best idea but he wasn’t all that concerned. “I mean this is really beautiful. Don’t misunderstand me, I love LA, but it’s...it’s not this. It’s inauthentic, it’s self-referential. I mean leaving Jersey, that’s a no-brainer,” he joked. “But this? Your awesome parents? Was that hard?”
matt → mia
mia: i’m so sorry ppl saw u on tour and at the big party we went to :/
mia: the nerve of those ppl :/
matt: Whatever the point remains
matt: I can't believe my trust in u is shot now
matt → mia
mia: ??? u know u literally have a nose cast rn?
matt: So?????? I was planning on hiding until it came off
phedova
“Yeah, that. Well, I never had the common sense to think about it. Back in the day, if I got gum in my hair, my dad would give me a haircut or take me to the local barber and that would be the end of it.” she shrugged, because that was a reality for Ophelia. “The world’s first grandma… if that’s so, what did the world’s first grandpa invent? I’m curious.”
“I’d ask how often you got gum in your hair that this was a pattern but I’m afraid to know” he said, poking fun at her for no other reason than his own entertainment. “The world’s first grandpa didn’t invent shit. Maybe waving a cane at kids from a porch and telling them to get off his lawn.”
hannah-banana-brooks
“I guess it’s that same urge that made us all wanna make potions out of sticks and leaves and mud puddles as kids,” Hannah answered with a nostalgic grin. “And it’s mingled with that same instinct that had me watching my mom put water with a dab of scent into a spray bottle but still believed here when she told me it was ‘Monster-Away-Spray’ and would rid me of the monster in my closet.” She picks up a piece of clear quartz and turns it over. “Isn’t it funny though, that this clear quartz, the simplest crystal in here, is the one that everyone says is like the master healer and the most powerful.”
“Oh shit, I forgot I used to do that,” Matt laughed, dropping the rock back into the bin and staring off into space for a second, memories coming back to him of himself and Margot collecting anything they could find in the backyard to combine in a big mixing bowl. In fact everything she said felt pretty much spot on, and when she drew his attention to the clear quartz in her hand he frowned at the observation, fascinated by it. “Yeah, that’s interesting. I guess it makes some sort of sense,” he said, finding another one in the bin and picking it up. “I think there’s something about simplicity that’s really attractive to people, especially in nature. Healing crystals are supposed to be tranquil. This thing is pretty tranquil-looking.”
lucian-harvey
Broken noses we’re exactly his speciality, but that didn’t mean it didn’t pique his interest, especially when it was somebody he knew. “Hm—” he hums, shifting his chair back slightly, his hand reaching for his pen. Not to write a prescription though, just to fiddle with it between his forefinger and thumb, his tongue darting across his lower lip for a moment as he seems to ponder the situation. He doesn’t answer Matts request straight away, instead choosing to hear him out. Though, the how came as no surprise to him, he’d known Matt long enough now to know he could test peoples boundaries. “Definitely a look—” he answers, his head shaking as he places the pen back down, sliding it away from him across the desk. “Yeah? Get the fangirls swooning over the swelling and the black eye? Rock and roll.” It was too late for this, he was tired. “Matt, you really should try the ibuprofen. It’ll reduce the swelling. You’re asking for something addictive and it’s honestly not going to target the pain correctly, besides, the cocktail you’re already taking, I promised to keep you alive.”
“You know me,” Matt said airily, “anything for the fangirls. They do pay for my house after all.” Of course putting his swollen and bruised up face in a photoshoot would have been less about the fangirls and more about his own entertainment and love of shock value, but he didn’t say that. When Luke told him -- as had the ER doctors -- to try the Ibuprofen Matt let his head fall back on the chair and made a loud sound of frustration. “Okay, I’ll take Ibuprofen on top of the Codeine. Do you have any idea how painful this shit is, man? My entire head is throbbing and I’m, like, barely an addict anymore. I’ve laid off the coke lately, doesn’t that count for anything?” Sure, he thought, it would have counted if he hadn’t been sitting here asking for different drugs. Still he raised his eyebrows like he was waiting for praise, the barest twitch of a smile on his lips the only give that he was perfectly aware of the absurdity of everything he was saying.
matt → mia
mia: oh yeah guess i did do that
mia: i told her ur an idiot who got into a fight :/
matt: Well maybe you shouldn't be telling people about my shit did u ever think of that
unfortunately for everybody i will keep doing whatever i want
matt → mia
mia: idk what ur talking about :/
matt: You told her about my nose and she bitched me out, that's what :/
matt → mia
mia: ??? what did i do
mia: gonna have to be more specific :/
matt: You know what u did rat
matt: Ratting me out to ivy
Ivy > Matt
Ivy: She’s not a rat, I asked about you and she was the one who told me after I pretty much pressured her..
Ivy: If I bring food and booze will you stop being whiney? I’ll even stop at Peachtree?
Matt: Sounds exactly like a rat move to me. That’s what I get for dating a fan though
Matt: Yeah alright, but you better bring about a million chorizo tacos
matt → mia
matt: So ur ratting me out to my friends now huh
theivyhart:
Ivy > Matt
Ivy: Because.. Emilia told me about your nose. and i feel like you need your ass kicked again to remember… not to get your ass kicked!
Matt: Damn what a rat
Matt: Can’t believe ur yelling at me, I thought I had a gf for that. Aren’t u supposed to cheer me on and be a bad influence or something 🥱🥱