DAY 31 OF IMPORTANT QUESTIONS
i want to extend a special thank you to @sparklejumprope13, @waundagore and @sokovianpuppy just because i can.
sooo on the 31st, all the important questions you answered during the month materialize at the same time in a single room
in one corner, the hippo that couldn't climb trees finally learned how, but now it's on top of the fridge and refuses to come down. in the other, the red-assed chimpanzee got so famous it became a digital influencer and is filming everything for tiktok. the bald guy you never named shows up as a confused electrician trying to turn off the ghost microwave that keeps beeping, while the frog with the puffed-up throat floats on the ceiling because it accidentally swallowed a baby heron
in the center of the room, chah lee (yes, you) is sitting on an ironing board, tied to a time bomb that the supersonic rhino left there before taking off. the bomb has 2 minutes on the display and a button that can only be pressed by your rebellious hand ā which, of course, is laughing at an inside joke you don't get
to make things worse: the teddy bear that used to help the unfaithful is in your lap and whispers that if you cut the red wire, all the hippos in the world will instantly get red butts ā but if you cut the blue wire, you'll wake up bald tomorrow and turn into a frog
baby herons watch everything from a window, taking notes on every move
you have 1 minute and 30 seconds.what do you do?
a) turn off the ghost microwave first, because the noise is messing with your concentration but that makes the rhino come back
b) convince the hippo to get down from the fridge so you can use it as a shield against the bomb but the chimpanzee's red butt reflects the light and blinds everyone
c) ask your rebellious hand which wire to cut, even though you know it'll crack a joke and waste time
d) throw the ironing board out the window and jump on it, hoping to survive as a "powerless superhero" but then you remember you're bald and the fall might rip off whatever little hair you had left
e) use the floating frog as a balloon to levitate up to the ceiling, grab the reality remote control (from the previous question) and hit "pause" to think things through but you find out the remote is with the unfaithful teddy bear, who demands an alliance in return
f) embrace the chaos and sit on the floor (most boring)
can you believe itās been 31 days? iād like to thank each and everyone of you for being here, but most of all @girlmineis for the wonderful questions and her dedication to the bit.
god, this was a throwback to read. i really would like to say, first of all, that i am not bald and that my hair is very very real, but youāll never believe me, so for the sake of the questions, i guess i have no hair.
the real choice here is D. thatās because in A, iām worried about the rhino, in B, i donāt want to use an innocent animal as a shield and i also donāt want to be blinded, in C, i donāt really trust my hand, in E, i feel the unfaithful teddy bear wonāt want to make an alliance with me, and Fā¦ youād find that boring, wouldnāt you? iām a lot of things, but i canāt be boring. i can sacrifice my hair. itāll grow back fast!
