Watching Season 4 of greys anatomy.
I’m glad Meredith’s actually getting therapy
EXPECTATIONS

if i look back, i am lost
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official daine visual archive

shark vs the universe

Product Placement
🩵 avery cochrane 🩵
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
we're not kids anymore.
noise dept.
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
occasionally subtle
🪼
will byers stan first human second

Andulka

#extradirty
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Origami Around
macklin celebrini has autism
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@maybethatsomethingcouldbewithyou
Watching Season 4 of greys anatomy.
I’m glad Meredith’s actually getting therapy
Grumpy Dennis
When Dennis is really, really tired, he gets grumpy, and Robby finds him adorable.
He complains about all sorts of things -from it being too hot to headaches to there being too much light, and so on.
Once he even complained because Robby was hugging him on the couch -it was summer and it was too hot- but two minutes after he’d moved a little further away, he was back in Robby’s arms, muttering something in a whiny tone that Robby didn’t actually hear but found utterly delightful.
And so, every time Dennis starts to get a little grumpier, Robby lets him sleep a little longer, making coffee and eggs just the way Dennis likes them, before waking him up.
They order food so Dennis doesn’t have to cook (because Robby might be able to scramble a couple of eggs, but it’s better if he stays away from the stove), and Robby then clears the table and washes the dishes, before giving Dennis a shoulder massage -which immediately relaxes him- and then they curl up on the couch, with Dennis not wanting to go to bed right away because he feels lonely without Robby and dozes off as soon as the TV turns on.
And Robby loves those moments because Dennis completely lets his guard down. It wasn’t always like this. At first, Dennis never complained -too worried that Robby would get tired of him- but little by little, when Dennis realized that Robby wasn’t going anywhere, he opened up more and more, and Robby loves this more than he can say.
Plus, there’s also the upside of always having Dennis in his arms, with Dennis resting his head on his shoulder and breathing on his neck.
And then a soft whisper.
“I love you”
Robby is the happiest man in the world.
Dennis who has significant hearing loss after a farm accident as a kid.
Dennis who can’t afford working hearing aids, so makes do with a pair he found on Facebook marketplace.
Dennis who favours one side significantly, to the point of being convinced that everyone knows (they don’t), and they all must hate him for being useless (they don’t know).
Dennis who uses these janky hearing aids despite constantly giving him a migraine, because he can’t let anything compromise his chances of being a doctor.
Dennis who completely understands that Abbott needs a break from his prosthetic, and is often the first to volunteer to cover his charting in the middle of the shift.
Dennis who cannot give himself allowances, because he’s not properly disabled; not like Abbot is anyway.
Dennis whose hearing loss is “self inflicted” and therefore needs to deal with the consequences of his actions (he was six).
Dennis who absolutely will not let himself have hearing breaks in the middle of a shift, no matter how much pain his ears are in.
Dennis who can’t take his aids out at night because he sleeps in shelters, and his hearing is the first line of defence against an attack.
Dennis who recognises the symptoms of an ear infection, but can’t afford antibiotics and the hospital cracked down on “borrowing” medicine.
Dennis who collapses mid shift after a particularly bad bout of vertigo.
Dennis who doesn’t really remember much after this because the floor was suddenly very, very close, and he was suddenly very, very cold.
…
Robby who sees Dennis pass out on shift.
Robby who curses these damn med students for drinking too much caffeine and not eating enough food.
Robby who walks over to Dennis and tries to rouse him.
Robby who thinks Dennis looks a little too out of it for it to just be low blood sugar.
Robby who touches Dennis and notices he’s ice cold.
Robby who holds Dennis as he starts seizing.
Robby who catches a glimpse of white in his ear, surrounded by red, angry tissue.
Robby who swears loudly and violently when he realises “god-fucking-dammit he’s deaf”.
Robby who curses every god he knows the name of (and he knows a lot) for putting Dennis in this situation.
…
Dennis who wakes up with a very stressed Robby next to him, saying words like “septic shock” and “septic encephalopathy” and “infection spread” and “potential brain damage”.
Robby who raises his voice in frustration, and Dennis who flinches imperceptibly.
Robby who drags Dennis to audiologist appointments and forces him to pick multiple different types of aids so he’ll be comfortable wherever.
Robby who pays for the new aids, but lets Dennis think insurance covers them.
Abbot who forces Dennis to take hearing breaks whenever he takes leg breaks because he’s “bored” and “needs company”.
Abbott who, for the first time in Dennis’ life, sits him down and teaches him the ASL he learnt from his vet friends.
Dennis, who when he formally attends ASL lessons, realises he’s been taught to swear like a sailor, and his vernacular is entirely comprised of military slang.
Dennis who doesn’t understand why Robby and Abbott are being so nice about being deaf, and explains all about how it was his fault that he lost his hearing (he was six).
Abbot who gives Robby a look, and signs him up for therapy the next day.
Dennis, who comes to the realisation that the factors surrounding his hearing loss are heavily consistent with signs of child abuse.
Robby, who can only hug Dennis as he breaks down, mourning the childhood he thought he had.
Abbot, who makes him hot cocoa when he wakes up from nightmares and rocks him back to sleep,
And Dennis.
Who finally feels, for the first time in his life, he is not just tolerated, but wanted too.
I have considered writing a deaf\HOH Hucklerobby fic to add my own experiences to it, and despaired over all the million unfinished AUs already in my WIPs. But lo and behold, this gem already exists.
Ilya trying to outplay his demons
this means more to me than it should
if you ship bucktommy in any form, can you like/repost this?
I’m trying to see something.
Concept:
Ilya does love seeing old photos of Shane. Fat Baby Shane™ in all his forms, toddler Shane in his little hockey gear, Shane in elementary school with a big missing-teeth smile, Shane blowing out the candles on his 10th birthday, Shane holding up his brand new driver's license at 16. The list goes on.
One day Yuna finds an old disposable camera. The expiration date on it says 2009. She tells Shane about it; it might have some old photos from his graduation on it or something. She'd gotten a digital camera around that time so she can't remember what she used this one for. Shane is pretty indifferent about it.
Yuna sends the camera off to some company that still develops old camera film. It's about 15 years old at this point, though, so whatever is on it might not even develop correctly.
A few weeks later Shane and Ilya are over for dinner. Yuna tells them she got the photos back and they actually turned out ok. She hands over the stack of 10 photos. Shane rolls his eyes, but Ilya grabs the photos and starts flipping through them. The first two look like they are from some school event; there's Shane surrounded by similarly aged kids in an auditorium. There's one of the three of them on Thanksgiving that year and another of the three of them with Yuna's parents at the same dinner. Two of David asleep on the couch with the family dog clearly taken on different days. One of a Christmas tree in the Hollander's living room. The next two are Shane on the ice in a rink that Ilya recognizes as the one in Regina. The one from their first World Juniors Tournament.
And Ilya freezes. The last photo in the stack is a close-up of Shane. He's in a white hoodie with a black coat over it. He has on a dark green beanie and he's standing next to the door to the rink. He's smiling for the camera and his freckles are crinkled near his eyes. It's the Shane that so awkwardly and so confidently introduced himself to Ilya the first time they met. The Shane that had tried so hard to talk to Ilya then. The Shane that Ilya could admit to himself now that he'd had a bit of a crush on already. His Shane.
His Shane was getting blurry as tears filled his eyes.
Someone asking Luca after Shane's first season as AC on the Centaurs: "So, is it difficult with basically three captains, especially if two of them are married that must be hard to get used to.
And Luca and the other rookies being like, oh you mean the Dad-Trifecta? it's the best thing that has ever happened to us.
You loose your skates or you need help with paperwork or you're just feeling kinda sad and need a dad hug - you go Bood. he will grill you some chicken and go speak to Coach for you. You call him or Cassie if you're sick and they will pick you up and deposit you on the floor with Milo and you are their baby now. I'm 23 years old but that's my dad tho
If you're having trouble with other players, or if you're in like, a crisis? Mama Bear Ilya, will 100% get arrested for any of us and/or pick you up from the middle of nowhere any time of night. You wanna ragebait other players? He has the perception of a God and can tell from one look when a players second wife will leave him. He can also tell when you're feeling like shit mentally and he will pick you up take you to Harris farm and make you dog walk with him while throwing sweets at you. Holmberg got high sticked the other week Ilya spent like, 2 hours going through the guys Instagram with us while wine drunk and ripping his entire life to pieces with us.
and Shane? He will come early to practice for you, he will tell me things wrong with my playing I didn't know EXISTED. Boyle was in a slump Hollander turned up at our house with a fucking smoothie get your ass out of bed we're going to the rink and he will completely pull apart your playing style with such precision that's it's beautiful to watch and I'm not even mad about it. Roz will be giving a fucking captains speech about how we can do better next week and he'll fucking pipe up in the corner going, well we will if Lapointe improves his footwork Coach, we're gonna be staying late on Saturday and Wiebe is like, sounds good Hollander like COACH you can't Agree For Me and he'll just go, Shane Hollander is giving you a private lesson I don't care what you're doing cancel it
I’m rewatching Greys anatomy. I hate Thatcher. Smacking Meredith like that. It isn’t her fault that his wife died 😡
They just put Meredith through the ringer all the time
I love this show but I’m not thrilled with Preston either though. Saying Cristina doesn’t like change but eventually she will be grateful. Gives me the ick. Cristina said she doesn’t want a big wedding she’s just doing it to make him happy.
More thoughts about season 3 and having watched all the other seasons as well
I also have complicated feelings about Derek and Meredith’s relationship. They do seem to really be in love. I agree with Bailey about the chief thing if it comes down to an either/or you choose the person you love because none of this matters if you’re alone. I think maybe there’s always been a power imbalance between Derek and Meredith (because they met and started dating when she was an intern and he seemed to have a savior complex with her) and some people didn’t think Derek was good for her. Because he always seemed to put his career before her. With the chief thing and the presidential brain thing.
And Cristina saying he’s very dreamy but he’s not the sun you are.
I wish they explored more about after her drowning Derek said I don’t know if I want to keep breathing for you. And Meredith saying later now’s not the time to give up on me. It’s a lot. Like if this was real life I think Meredith would probably be diagnosed with depression and PTSD from everything she’s been though. But I’m also not in the medical field so maybe she is just able to push though even given everything.
I may read or write some greys anatomy fanfic lol all my other shows have either ended or are on hiatus so I’ve kind of been hyper fixating on greys anatomy 😂
I am excited to watch the end of heartstopper though later this week. The end of Good Omens was great 😍❤️
Tommy Kinard very fun to draw☺️
(update: made minor edits)
silva's been hanging on to that one for so long
We don’t talk about this enough. With all the big romantic gestures in The Long Game, this, to me, is one of the most romantic moments.
We know Ilya isn’t a fan of Shane’s restrictive diet. He teases him about it, but Ilya is an expert ragebaiter who knows how to tease the people he cares about when they feel safe and in ways that never really hurt.
Shane is “frantic” in this scene. Ilya has the perfect opening to say something about his diet, and he doesn’t take it. He sees that Shane is panicking, steps in and fixes it. He was looking at that menu thinking about Shane and Shane’s fuckass diet that Ilya doesn’t even like. But he knows this is important to Shane. He knows Shane is already nervous about being on a date with Ilya in public and being with another queer couple. So he meets Shane’s needs without Shane ever having to ask, and he does it quietly, without drawing any attention, so that Shane can save face.
Of course he’s gonna tease him about it a little bit later because that’s what they do. But he only does that AFTER Shane’s had a chance to catch his breath and feel safe again.
To be loved is to be known indeed.
LOOK AT THESE CUTIES I AM SCREAMING
the world's hottest third wheel
From the day I met you, you’re the one. I tried to fight it. I really did. But it was always you. The life I want, whatever that looks like, it’s with you.”
It was always you.