may just write

I am an anonymous blogger. I write what I want. 

[mayjustwrite-blog]

"[I have] twice, on separate continents, carried out an experiment designed to prove the considerable curiosity of cows. This is an experiment I urge you to repeat, simply for the giddy thrill of it. Go into a pasture where cows are grazing in the distance. Shout to get their attention, and then suddenly lie down. The moment you do, they will hurry over to investigate, encircling you and staring down at you with unmitigated bovine fascination."

Spook, Mary Roach

[mayjustwrite-blog]

A Laugh: 9 year olds give good advice

There have been many times that people around me have asked me why I'm not married.

Today, a 9 year old that I teach asked me if I am married. After I told her that I am not married or dating anyone, she told me about her uncle who is "like 35 or something" and he's not married and I shouldn't be like him because "he's a little weird and maybe a little crazy."

She then asked why I'm not married. I told her that I am happy being single and I am very busy teaching kids like her, and doing other things that I am interested in. Her response was, "okay, just be careful you don't end up like my uncle."

Well, I don't know her uncle, but I think it's safe to say I do not want to be like him. Whatever that means.

[mayjustwrite-blog]

How much has to be explored and discarded before reaching the naked flesh of feeling.

Claude Debussy

[mayjustwrite-blog]

To listen is an effort, and just to hear is no merit. A duck hears also.

Igor Stravinsky

[mayjustwrite-blog]

A list: Favorite sights

1. Clouds

2. Snow on mountain tops

3. Sunlight through the leaves

4. Leaves being blown of trees

5. Sunlight through the curtains

6. Students playing in recitals

7. Storms coming in

8. Parking spots

9. Peers doing well

10. My dogs when I visit my parents

11. Fruit on trees

[mayjustwrite-blog]

a pet peeve: justification

I hate when people justify their decisions! I think we should all make our decisions, and then follow through. As adults, we shouldn’t have to tell people why we made that choice. Most of the time, we’re probably making up excuses anyway. 

I am totally guilty of doing this, but it’s such a strong cultural thing. I would rather just say, “hey, I’m quitting this job. Thank you,” rather than making something up, or even telling people the real reason.

Mind your own business, make your own choices.

[mayjustwrite-blog]

A list: Favorite Smells

1. rain

2. fresh air

3. soup on the stove

4. corn bread

5. wet hay

6. clothes out of the dryer

7. gasoline

8. vinegar

9. lemon honey tea

10. coffee

11. fresh baked bread

12. new books

13. french bread

14. garlic

15. fall leaves

16. flowers in spring

17. tomatoes

18. the first time i turn on the furnace

[mayjustwrite-blog]

Music is ... A higher revelation than all Wisdom & Philosophy

Ludwig van Beethoven

[mayjustwrite-blog]

a list: currently...

i am currently

wearing: sweats and a t-shirt, no socks or bra

eating: taco soup with taquitos

watching: greys anatomy and goblin

reading: final exits the illustrated encyclopedia of how we die

drinking: green tea

playing: color by number, two dots

playing (musically): ginastera, gershwin, brahms, and scarlatti

writing: a final project proposal

listening to: nct127

preparing for: graduate school

[mayjustwrite-blog]

Beethoven tells you what it's like to be Beethoven and Mozart tells you what it's like to be human. Bach tells you what it's like to be the universe.

Douglas Adams

[mayjustwrite-blog]

A list: 10 things I worry about

1. Health insurance

2. Taxes

3. Graduate school

4. If I can make enough money as a teacher where I live

5. Inconveniencing my roommates

6. Picking rep for recitals

7. That my parents worry that I’m not dating

8. Being prepared for organ lessons

9. Moving

10. Building a studio

[mayjustwrite-blog]

The only true immortality lies in one's children.

Johannes Brahms

[mayjustwrite-blog]

A while ago, one of my musician friends, Ally, completely lost it. I was sitting and chatting with some other musician friends, when Ally came up the stairs and she was acting weird. She started bawling and she couldn’t breathe and was having stomach pains. The next second she was totally her old self. And then she was freaking out again. 

It was terrifying.

She could not focus, but after much probing we learned that she hadn’t eaten in two days, and had only been sleeping a few hours a night.

Ally told me last week that she has been practicing close to 8 hours a day, and then she had homework and work on top of that. She has been stressing out about graduate school and graduating. She also drove 30 hours by herself for a lesson. 

Two weeks ago a professor collapsed in the bathroom from lack of sleep.

Three weeks ago somebody dropped out because of the stress. 

In the last three years I have seen at least a dozen people drop out, half of them because of injuries and sickness and the other half because of the pressure.

Being a musician is hard. Take care of yourselves, whatever it is you do. Don’t betray your body or ask too much of it. 

Physical and mental health > everything else.

[mayjustwrite-blog]

When a man is in despair, it means that he still believes in something.

Dmitri Shostakovich

[mayjustwrite-blog]

would you rather: know when you are going to die, or how?

I DON’T KNOW. My roommate asked me tonight if I would want her to tell me if she knew I was going to die. 

First of all, there are no loopholes (obviously), and you won’t know exactly how you will die, but you will know what it involves (i.e. sickness, cars, murder...)

I think if I knew when I was going to die, I would just stress out about it all the time. I would rather know how simply because I don’t want to know when. 

[mayjustwrite-blog]

A Memory: a not great situation

Years ago, I was dating this guy. It was a mostly physical thing, but I didn’t really care. Until I did. 

He was over one day, and it was getting pretty hot and heavy. He asked permission, I said no. And I am glad I did. I did not care for him, and I wasn’t looking for that. He stopped. I am grateful for that everyday. 

[mayjustwrite-blog]

A list: Things that remind me of living abroad

Country #1

-smell of garbage/cigarettes

-waiting for a check for forever

-frigid weather

-dirty stairwells

-crowded buses

-heavy snow

-drinking tea

-drunk people

-winding streets

Country #2

-upbeat cashiers

-smell of wet hay

-warm toilet seats

-humidity

-mountains covered with trees

-boxy cars

-fast talkers