Zemblanity

[Zemblanity (n.): a random occurrence of unfortunate events. Antonym: serendipity.] This blog features terrible poetry and terrible prose writing alike, as well as occosional outbursts of my inner armchair sports expert. The floggings will continue until morale improves.

[mcbugger]

Today I played cricket in school and did not die. 3/10 & 14. Today was a good day.

[mcbugger]

the pearl and the bank clerk defeat england

Jarrod Kimber's, aka the world's favourite bullshitter, describes Sri Lanka's triumph over England in June. Also safe for non-cricket fans.

[mcbugger]

Misbah zindabad!

The man I would bet on getting the slowest Test hundred just equaled the record for the fastest, while getting the fastest fifty in the meantime! Very selfless batting, he deserves his place in the XI. Good innings by Azhar as well. I'm as happy as a dog in a kebab shop!

[peakyshelbys]

13/07/14

[mcbugger]

The fact that he looks like he hasn't had a shit since the age of five doesn't help either. 

[fusrodrawblog-blog]

About 95% done! Just need to add water, fish, and the flag on the small castle :)

[mcbugger]

May I please be your fish? I spent about half my childhood swimming and/or playing water polo. I have the necessary qualifications. I am applying for a gill transplant right now. Just let me get in there.

[mcbugger]

Nothing better to help you achieve tranquility. Jayamangalani.

[mcbugger]

Oh what a goal! Come on the boys in blue!

[mcbugger]

Christos Afroudakis is playing, we might have a chance...

[mcbugger]

Ah, Greece are playing at the European Water Polo championships in about five minutes. I fucking love water polo. It is quite the dog's bollocks, if you will. But I cannot help think that the whole sport was invented so that fit people with really nice bodies receive enough kicks in the bollocks to be made sterile so that chubbies can get a chance at finding sexual partners. Having said that, the only thing I would rather be doing right now than watch the water polo is go and play water polo. Can anyone take me to the sea please?

[shineystar105]

[mcbugger]

martselli:

History of Ireland 1883

mcbugger that’s for you

[mcbugger]

Hip hip bloody hurrah, it's a world record, now hit the fuck out.

[mcbugger]

Is anyone watching the Test on Sky Sports? Because that was a terrifyingly accurate trumpet impression from Aggers just now.

[mcbugger]

I am a Sri Lanka cricket fan. (N. B.: I am not actually Sri Lankan, but this is beside the point.) Now can someone please explain me how our team has gotten more interesting than both England and India? This Test match is almost certainly set for a draw, but both teams are playing boring, defensive cricket. I swear I am only watching the Test match due to a complete lack of social/love life. Jesus Christ, can you just do something already!?

[mcbugger]

If Tillakaratne Dilshan doesn't get the Man of the Match award I will get cat whiskers painted on my face. 

[mcbugger]

^How all my Greek friends are feeling right now

[mcbugger]

Could angry soccer players please refer to the above behaviour guide when getting slightly brushed on during matches thank you

Compliments of rugby players

[mcbugger]

Yes, these are Mahela Jayawardena's bowling stats. He is having a bowl! I realise this is just to get the new ball, but it is impressive nonetheless.