Author - Ericka Michele

28 | Poetry Wednesdays | Daily Progress Reports | The Demons Within - Book One chapter 18

[mcnooberton]

mirror

i’m surrounded by blank stares

though their question is clear.

an added pressure to the smile on my face

wavering with each tick of the clock,

begging to be at ease.

their eyes begin to bulge,

closing me into a cage

until they get what they want.

i dig my nails beneath my flesh,

picking around for the answer evading my consciousness,

the one that may cause my wounds to worsen.

there’s no place to run

and no choice

but to keep up the charade with clasped eyes -

tears threatening to stain my curated mask.

the pain in my cramping cheeks intensify

my fear of discovery,

of shame and disbelief

that any day i’ll know the real me

and i won’t like what i see.

-ericka michele

[thewindowofthesummerhouse]

Sergey Svetov

[jgmartin]

consider

The dark truth is that the nightmare of nuclear armageddon takes place in three stages.

The first is what people often assume to be the worst. The bombs. The explosions. The mushroom clouds and the screaming. But this the easy part because you’re either afraid or dead. That’s it.

Stage two is harder to bear. With it comes fire and black rain. With it comes the fruits of violence and the consequences of fury. Our cities crumble. Our hope becomes a distant memory while our love turns radioactive.

But that isn't the worst of it, no.

Not by far. The final stage is what's called the Dead World.

In it, the strings that tie us together are burned away. There are no laws. No customs. Murder and looting become widespread while depravity becomes necessity. We walk between pillars of smoldering corpses, haunted by the fallout of our hate. Our very souls join the ashes of human civilization.

In the Dead World, we become the ghosts of yesterday.

[mcnooberton]

chills

[mcnooberton]

Working on a sample

i really need a job i can enjoy

that gives instead of takes

[mcnooberton]

jazzy

i soared in the breeze today,

it was more reliable than it has ever been.

it took me to the clouds,

below then above,

with no extra effort from me.

i was weightless,

losing myself in the euphoria -

my fingers loosened from their fist.

nothing is as miserable

as the bonds keeping me on the ground,

yet, not grounded.

it felt great leaving that behind -

the strain

trying to tell me time is meaningless.

and i know,

man, do i know,

moments like that are fleeting,

but i’ll embrace them as they come

and search for them as they go.

ericka michele

[mcnooberton]

It's been a minute.

It's weird constantly posting somewhere for me, but Tumblr has been by far the easiest. Despite me fallback for the past week or 2, I'm going to try and be more consistent again.

I don't know if I mentioned my camping trip, and I don't reread my post - unless it's poetry - so maybe you're hearing this again, but I went camping last week. I miss it already because good damn it, it's what I'm still craving. SO much better than the shit I came back to when I got home. But it will all work out (at least that's what I'm telling myself).

Anyways, on to the writing stuff:

No poem, I know they're just too good... right?

I finished my first draft edits (is that a thing - guess it's mine) for chapter 18 and I'm now moving on to 19, maybe. You see, workshop is probably my downfall and my grace. The downfall is that it slows my progress, there's more editing because I want it to have all the information I need in the chapter. It ain't gotta be perfectly written, but I could leave it more undone and work faster without workshop. The upside is accountability because... ya'll ain't no help. Not to mention I like the feedback they provide, I'm just more of a stickler before I hand in my work.

I also am doing a creative workshop every other week with my local library, which was nice.

I'm done dumping on anyone who reads, you should expect that on any form of social media.

[mcnooberton]

My poetry is consistent...

I mean, I try to write positively but there's dark shit in my mind, so many dark places. They're probably a bit repetitive and unrefined, they have to be released though.

[mcnooberton]

downhill

it was sweet to wake up to songbirds -

their pitch rising with the sun -

and watching the sky change hues,

its pink reflecting on the lake below.

the compromise, the growth i've shown,

unrecognized.

in a home that's a wasteland.

barren and stripped of all the peace

i brought to me.

the days so quickly forgotten,

lost to the spiral of viciousness

from my own thoughts about reality

and your careful words.

they burn, now, as if i had no grace

but i know.

I KNOW!

this isn't going to help anybody,

especially me.

[mcnooberton]

Late night writing

More like editing but, my word count is growing as I fill in all the holes in my ideas. I think I'll present the final result once I'm finished with the first draft's edits.

Now, I could continue but my brain craves distraction. Time for my reward.

[mcnooberton]

something something

pain has a funny way of tickling

like the dig-in-your-ribs kind of tickle -

it hurts so much you laugh.

i mean the sky doesn't have to shine

for things to seem bright,

though i guess it's easier,

i know all i have to do is bend backward.

on the other side of it all,

i might tumble down.

there's something to hide

because i take pride in the climb.

join my journey,

or don't.

i'll be shamelessly crying

on the floor,

bleeding and dying

but still trying to grasp onto anything.

[mcnooberton]

Not quite sure I feel about this poem. My mind is feeling a little crazy and tired - just out of it.

Thanks for reading this if you did, truly.

[mcnooberton]

something something

pain has a funny way of tickling

like the dig-in-your-ribs kind of tickle -

it hurts so much you laugh.

i mean the sky doesn't have to shine

for things to seem bright,

though i guess it's easier,

i know all i have to do is bend backward.

on the other side of it all,

i might tumble down.

there's something to hide

because i take pride in the climb.

join my journey,

or don't.

i'll be shamelessly crying

on the floor,

bleeding and dying

but still trying to grasp onto anything.

[mcnooberton]

Okayyyy...

This is a daily progress report, but I'm getting bored of the formatting and I just want more variation, randomness, more like me and my many facets.

Anyways, word count? Who's she? Because I was writing the summary for the chapter I'm on since I hadn't done that.

If you're following my journey then you know yesterday I was supposed to be editing. Life happened - child, partner, brother, sisters, DAD - and I didn't get to do much at all, though I did realize I should probably write a summary. I DID tell myself to plan more and look at me now, planning, while going through life shit.

even forgot a poem today, but expect one tomorrow.

[melaninadorned]

Worth the Read | Melanin Adorned

[mcnooberton]

Editing today!

I'm not finished with chapter 18, but I'm don't in love with the lack of dimension. The lack of purpose and development that's plaguing my thoughts is holding me back from continuing. Hopefully, I can gain a new perspective.

PS

I feel like I do too much editing and it's because I didn't plan out my TRILOGY. Book one (my first book in progress) is teaching me everything I need to learn in order to become a stronger writer/planner come book two. There will come a time I share videos on Youtube about this challenging journey, in hopes of inspiring other writers to embrace their noob status and everything that may come with it.

[mcnooberton]

Daily progress report:

Word count: 110

I'm blanking, good night.

[mcnooberton]

Probably

going to skip writing today. Instead, I'll be reading for another workshop member and catching up with her revisions. If can stay awake, you'll find a post either early in the morning or added to tomorrows progress report.

[mcnooberton]

Daily progress report:

Word count: 131

I'm so tired today. Last night was long and cathartic - I caught up with my little sister. Today took more of a toll on me but a little breath of the wild and I almost forget that my roommate's friend is spending his third night sleeping on our couch!

PS

I ordered new mics and should be producing more Youtube content. I'm thinking of changing my channel name to my Tumblr name. We'll see how it goes.