Cemetery Etiquette - A Guide
It is no surprise that those who explore witchcraft or perhaps anything of the 'weird' nature are drawn to Cemeteries. Afterall, spirits are a prevalent and reoccurring aspect of witchcraft, but it is important to remember that like all sacred grounds whether a temple, church, etc, there is a fundamental aspect of respect that must be applied.
First and foremost, it comes with importance to understand WHY the cemetery needs respect. In its essence, the cemetery not only acts as a resting place for the deceased and lost but also acts as a place of significant energy that often draws witches and practitioners.
The most important thing to understand is knowing your goal for entering a cemetery. Are you there to view, commune with spirits, place offerings, or even work with spirits?
Whatever is your reason for passing by, it's important to remember one truth: Not every spirit wants to interact with you.
Ghosts do not owe us anything. If our intention is to work with them, it has to be done so with respect. I see it often online where people mention working with spirits, and viewers sometimes get the impression that this must mean it is easy to work with them.
In some cases, yes! But we must approach every situation with respect, nonetheless.
When entering a cemetery, it is a common folk tradition from Greek origin to place a coin on the headstone of a deceased loved one. This is because when the dead pass on, they must give a coin to a ferryman named Charon in order cross the river Styx. Leaving the coin on the headstone acts as a way to provide your loved one with the coin necessary for travel, but in modern day, this tradition has evolved in sorts.
In America and Canada, it is common to leave a certain coin on the headstone of a fallen soldier as a remembrance of their sacrifice.
It should also be stated that it is extremely disrespectful to move or take any coins on a headstone of someone you do not know regardless of meaning for its placement. This should be a given, but I've seen many online doing so anyway.
Furthermore, placing a coin on a headstone can also simply signify admiration, respect, and deeper feelings. For example, when I was eleven, I happened across a grave with a story behind it that has stuck with me for years. I plan to come back to this grave and leave a coin. Not because I knew them personally, but their story struck a chord that has moved me for years. So never be afraid of leaving coins on headstones, as it is a sign of respect.
Another topic I see spoken about often is whether it is okay to stand atop a grave. This is a discussion with many different opinions, and truthfully, I think it's important to at least define WHY you are crossing over graves.
Whether you know this grave's owner or not, I think it truly lies to your beliefs. Nobody can prevent you from doing anything, and in this post, it is not my intention to police you on how you go about traveling cemeteries. But what I will say, is as long as you have respect for who you are crossing over, I don't think it is as big of an issue as many say it is.
For some, it's a way to be closer to the deceased. And other times, perhaps it's the only way to cross to get to the other graves. Either way, if you aren't okay with it, then don't do it. If you are, then do it with respect. Simple as that!
Now onto more personal interactions with spirits. Starting off, it's a good idea to leave an offering for said spirit if you wish to interact or work with them. But any interaction must be after approval. Remember, spirits owe us nothing. Ask for permission either through meditation, pendulums, or tarot (or whatever you deem fit). Once given permission, you can absolutely leave an offering. Just be sure whatever you leave won't end up being a hazard toward the flora or fauna. If it is something that cannot degrade naturally, I would advise you pick it up later on and dispose of it properly.
A relationship with a spirit must always be born out of respect. Do not assume you deserve any interaction and instead ask and wait. If you receive no answer, then that is your answer. Thank the spirit and go about your day as usual.
Another reason for witches going to cemeteries is due to the resources it provides, such as graveyard dirt.
Graveyard dirt is a wonderful tool, and relatively easy to obtain. Please note: graveyard dirt is an aspect of both closed AND open practices. I will do a post eventually on how to use graveyard dirt respectfully as an open practice and how to avoid using it in ways of a closed practice.
So how to obtain graveyard dirt? Similar to leaving an offering, it is as easy as asking. Simply pull out your divination tool or meditate on your question, and act accordingly to the answer you receive. Collect with respect, and it is not unnatural to leave an offering in return. In fact, it is very sweet to do so!
Thank you so much for reading! As I stated before, I will be doing a post on what is, and how to use graveyard dirt in a respectful and open practice way. Please let me know if you have any questions, I am more than happy to answer! :)
