Med School Baking

High Stress. Tasty Treats. 

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This is my last week as a medical student. We graduate on Friday. I never thought this day would come! I can hardly believe it.

M1 year saw some of the hardest times of my life. When I started medical school, it was the first time I lived so far from home. Everything was new to me. Driving down streets now familiar was once tinted with shades of sorrow and mourning the loss of my old life, friends, and relationships. But that gradually changed, and no matter how many times I wanted to quit and fly home, someone or something kept me going. I was cleaning out mountains of my old notes (why do we keep these things?!) and thought aloud, “I could never be a first-year medical student ever again in my life.” I applaud all the M1s currently chugging along. You will get there if you keep at it.

M2 year brought its own set of challenges. I was plugged into a friends group over the summer while doing research, and it was some of the most fun I’d had in medical school. We road tripped, did group workouts in the summer nights, ate out way more than we could afford to. School was school, and we had Step 1 to conquer. That month of studying brought us all near the brink of insanity. To the M2s, remember the bigger picture. Step 1 scores are important, but don’t let it define you.

M3 year was when I started hitting my stride. I tried to like all my rotations, but quite frankly, didn’t like most. I knew I wanted to do something surgical, and my research and background was in ophthalmology. But I loved surgery and most things about it (ahem, most--ask me about that if you want). I found that unlike my first 2 years of didactics, if I worked hard and put in the effort, I generally got out of a rotation what I put in. It was so gratifying to finally care for patients.

M4 year was up and down. Residency applications were stressful, although it was fun to get lots of time off to travel and interview and generally enjoy life. I learned as much as I could without the pressure of feeling like I needed to perform (I did an away sub-I in general surgery AFTER interview season for fun). But mostly these days, I’m fighting waves of senioritis as I sit in class for four more days.....

As I mentioned, I am going into general surgery. I am staying at my home institution, where I have the most amazing mentors and friends. I’m a little far from home. But home can change.

So I guess this is farewell! I may choose to revive this blog as as iteration of surgery baking (is that taken?) but we will see how my time management goes. Thanks for being with me through my baking adventures. I hope we kept each other a little bit saner.

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I matched in general surgery! 

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Hello Old Friends

It’s been a longggg time. In the last 4 months I’ve:

Been living out of a suitcase! It was interview season

Gone to Disneyland

Celebrated my 28th birthday

Completed an away rotation in general surgery at a big CA institution, for fun (but it was still tough)

Submitted my rank list

Started making plans for post-graduation vacation, sorta

What doesn’t make the list is baking. I haven’t baked anything in a very long time! I came back to my apartment after 4 months of being away, and am currently dusting off and taking inventory of my pantry.

There is still so much I haven’t done before residency, and it feels like there isn’t much time left before my life is surgery. Well, hopefully.  

I thought about not restarting this blog up again, but I recently re-read Better by Atul Gawande for the third time. At the end of the book, he encourages medical students to write: “Most of all, by offering your reflections to an audience, even a small one,  you make yourself part of a larger world...The published word is a declaration of membership in a community and also of a willingness to contribute something meaningful to it.”

So I’ll keep baking and writing as I can.

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It’s been a long time coming, but I finally made my letter writers a gift.

Remember those jars I asked you guys about? Well I had today off because I’m on my way to a conference right now, and so it made logistical sense to fire up the oven, bake, and deliver them to the hospital!

Thanks to those who gave me suggestions and ideas! :)

Apple roses are simple to make and elegant to give as gifts. It’s one strip of puff pastry rolled thinly, thinly sliced apples laid on top, sprinkled with cinnamon sugar, rolled up and baked. That’s it! Tastes like a flakey apple pie but without all the goopiness that I usually associate with apple pie.

Because my jars were on the small side, I made brownies also and stacked two on the bottom and placed a rose on top.

(And yes it’s only two jars right now. These are prototypes and I’m tweaking ideas for the next two!)

I’ll make a step by step tutorial for puff pastry some time soon.

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Submitted ERAS! Celebrating by bringing mini churros to a party. They're the smitten kitchen recipe--Deb is a genius. I'm also testing them as thank you gifts to my letter writers! Other things I might be testing: salted caramels, madeleines, macarons, and cookies. What do you think will fill and keep in a little jar well?

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I MISS THIS BLOG and I hope you are doing wonderfully!!!!! You are a gem. The black magic cupcakes you've posted about made my little brother's football team so happy!

Thanks anon! :) I’m so happy you enjoy the blog! And I love that you made the cupcakes for your brother’s team–that’s very sweet of you! For those of you just tuning in–black magic cake has been my go-to chocolate cake for the last six years. 

I’ve been trying to keep up with baking, but it’s been difficult on busy surgery months. I’m going to try reeeally hard to bake more savory things (like bread! cheese pastries! maybe a pie! okay, that last one was not savory) in the near future.

If that doesn’t work, I’ll always have M4 spring. :) Stay tuned.

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Transplant Surgery

So I just finished my Sub-I month on Transplant Surgery, and it was wild. Never have I slept so little or worked so much in my life. Transplant literally takes the sickest of sick patients and gives them a second chance at life. If that’s not incredible, I don’t know what is.

Transplant surgery is so complicated and involves so much ethical, social, and medical consideration that we had team meetings about it three times a week. It didn’t matter if we were in the OR operating all night and day, the next afternoon we met as a team of hepatobiliary doctors, transplant nephrologists, social work, pharmacy, and transplant surgeons to talk about potential organ donors, recipients, procurements, and patients.

So for my last day on service, I do what I always do: I made cupcakes. With a spin.

I piped some chocolate kidneys and livers. I mixed some dark chocolate with white chocolate to fill the livers, but the effect wasn’t as pronounced as I hoped. The pink of the kidneys are Wilton’s candy melts. The roomie said the livers kind of look like poops. Yep.

Due to the busy nature of transplant, I was only at home for about two waking hours per day, so I managed to get the job done over the course of two days.

The cake base is Black Magic cake, and I put a dollop of dark chocolate ganache in the middle for good measure (not pictured).

Because after standing all day in the OR, I wanted to stand in my kitchen EVEN LONGER, so I made some caramel sauce.

Homemade caramel is SO EASY and SO DELICIOUS it should be a crime. Here’s the recipe: 1 cup sugar heated in a sauce pan until dark brown, mix in 6 tablespoons butter (will splatter and hiss), whisk in 1/2 cup heavy cream, and salt to taste. That’s it.

I have so much leftover caramel right now that I brought it to a weekend at the cabin to put on pancakes, and the roomie and I are drizzling it on ice cream and stirring it in coffee. AND THERE IS STILL A BUNCH LEFT. What do I do with it?

So there you go. From-scratch chocolate cupcakes with dark chocolate ganache centers with cream cheese frosting, homemade caramel sauce, and a little chocolate organ. 

I made enough for not only the whole team, but also for the other surgical teams sharing the workroom. Anyone who has already worked 8 hours before noon deserves a cupcake.

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Took Step 2 CK a few weeks back, and then started M4 year days after that. Andddd the senioritis has started to kick in. Ps. Does anyone know anything about writing personal statements for surgery residency?... :)

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Hello tumblr, I still exist!

I just haven't been baking much lately. With clerkships (recently, the wonderful world of anesthesiology and ophthalmology), Step 2 CK studying, and the fact that I've been trying to eat healthier, I just haven't had reason to bust out the butter and sugar.

But I will tell you that today I made the most delicious chicken shawarma. I used this recipe for the chicken. I whipped up some garlic aioli (super simple!) and spread store-bought avocado hummus on the pita. To finish it off, I made a simple and fresh cucumber relish with diced cukes, diced tomatoes, corn, and some spring onions, seasoned with salt, pepper, and a squeeze of lemon juice.

I took a bite out of the pita before I remembered to snap a photo. It was that good. Fortunately, I made enough for a few meals...3 day weekend = study weekend.

As I count down my days to Step 2 CK (32 days!) and starting M4 year (36 days!) I alternate between extreme nervousness and extreme gladness. I can’t believe three years of medical school has passed. I hope I’m somewhat wiser for it. 

Also, I’m fairly certain I’m going into general surgery. I’ve planned my M4 schedule for doing several advanced surgery electives, a Sub-I, and I have an away rotation scheduled at home in California. I have mixed feelings on the away rotation (it’s an age-old debate, as you know) but I’m trying to view it as diversifying my learning experience. Plus, I’ll be living at home for a month during the snowy winter!

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Cheat Baking Chocolate Croissants

I’m on Psychiatry right now, and it is SO interesting. I’m 95% sure I’m going into General Surgery (yay for monumental decisions that determine your life course!) but I truly believe that psych is something that is useful across all specialties. In the one week I’ve been on, I’ve already seen almost every DSM-5 diagnosis related to psychotic, mood, and personality disorders.

Now that I’m in the wonderful world of 8-5pm inpatient adult psychiatry, I had a little time to make breakfast. I’m cheating because this is store-bought croissant dough and I simply filled them with dark chocolate chips. I used an artisan brand instead of the canned stuff, but the results were still less than satisfactory. I wish that the dough wasn’t pre-scored into triangles so I could form the chocolate croissants into the rectangles they deserve to be.

Oh well, there’s always the weekend.

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ObGyn and Chocolate Truffles

I’m currently on my ObGyn block. I started with a week of Gynecological Oncology (surgical management of cancers affecting reproductive tracts of women, mostly) and am now in various clinics. 

I have a little bit more time now than when I was on general surgery--understatement of the year! It became very normal for me to get home at 6 or 630pm, go to bed by 830pm, wake up at 3:30am to get to the unit and round on patients while I was on Emergency Surgery. The weeks went by quickly!

I’ve been experimenting lately with being a wannabe chocolatier, mainly because I made some for my boyfriend for Valentine’s Day when he visited.

They’re pretty simple! Sorry I don’t have a picture of the very messy process...there are still chocolate-covered bowls in my dishwasher to this day.

Basically, melt good-quality chocolate (I used about 5 oz of Trader Joe’s 60% and 72% dark, plus Ghirardelli 60% for dipping) in a bowl, mix with 1/2 cup of heavy cream to make a ganache. Chill, scoop, roll into balls, chill, and dip in melted chocolate and roll in desired garnishes. I looked a few recipes before deciding they had too many unnecessary ingredients (like light corn syrup).  

The first batch (first picture above) was on the softer side because my cream: chocolate ratio was higher, and I also got fancier with roasting/chopping my own almonds and dusting of cocoa powder. I gave the second batch to some friends at school.

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Hiatus

So I haven’t posted in a long time, I know. There was An Incident that happened to me last semester, that I’ll make into another case report sometime.

Right now I’m on my surgery rotation! I celebrated my birthday by being in the OR until 7:30pm. Our cases started late and took unexpected turns. The nurses and anesthesia team had mostly left by that hour. It was interesting to start the morning being yelled at for standing too close to the mayo stand, and then later in the evening being commanded to grab instruments off of it because there was no one left to do it. 

And then when I finally hustled my way to a girlfriend’s place for small group 1 hour late, having gone through the McDonald’s drive-through for dinner (which I almost never do), I was surprised by this magnificent creation. There is caramel underneath (!!) and my name written beautifully (which of course, you can’t see). It was glorious to sit on the floor, eat sweet treats, and be surrounded by amazing friends who love me despite my inevitable crankiness/sweatiness/tiredness/zombieness in these upcoming 6 weeks. 

What a day to be celebrated.

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Pumpkin Pastries

Happy Thanksgiving! These pumpkin cheesecake pastries were inspired by the season...and also by McDonald’s apple pie. I wanted to combine two of my favorite ingredients: pumpkin, and puff pastry, but couldn’t find a good recipe that did just that.

Enter: 4 oz cream cheese, 1 cup fresh pumpkin puree (from the pumpkin in this post. If using fresh pumpkin, make sure to cook it down to evaporate some liquid), around 1 tablespoon of cinnamon/nutmeg/ginger, 1/2 teaspoon salt, 1/2 cup brown sugar, 1/4 cup white sugar, and 1 egg. I dreamed up the ratio, and it came out just fine.

I used store-bought puff pastry this time. I didn’t have my usual energy to make it from scratch.

Trader Joe’s pumpkin butter to seal up the ends!

I used a beaten egg wash for some shine and baked at 400 degrees for about 20 minutes, rotating halfway through. Since it’s a custardy filling I was hesitant to crank it up so high, but it seemed to work fine. Do it for the puff pastry’s sake.

The finished result was a cross between a pumpkin pie, cheesecake, and flaky turnover. I was pleased with the results (even though I still prefer my own puff pastry, harhar--and oh, I might sprinkle some sugar on the top next time). My friends didn’t complain, either.

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Missing my oven

One year ago, apple pie cookies. Cozy and crisp. Two words that describe my favorite season.

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Call the Whambulance

Guys. I’m living in a barely furnished hospital call room that is maybe 60 square feet of space, or roughly the size of my bathroom. Speaking of bathroom, there is none. I have to go to the gym on the second floor of the hospital to shower. Those patient rooms complete with running water, a mirror, and a flushing toilet are looking really good right now...

Because it’s a small hospital is that you have to sign up for food by the morning, otherwise you don’t get lunch. Guess who didn’t have lunch?

I woke up at 530am today, arrived at my site at 8am, and was immediately put to work until 7pm. I am now unpacking my bags (rather, trying not to trip over them) and eating an orange and chips that I brought with me from home.

I’m also trying to process events in clinic from this morning, which has been a HUGE change for me. I’m now in Small Town, population 4,000 (0.04% Asian). 

Quotes from today:

“Were you born here? Are you parents US citizens? Did they go that route?”

“Why aren’t you married? No boyfriend? Partner?”

“That provider doesn’t sign birth control scripts.”

“San Francisco AND Berkeley...you’re a liberal aren’t you? It’s okay I won’t tell anyone.” 

“You’re thinking of surgery? It’s the wrong profession for a woman. You’re going to have no window to have babies. [here’s where I said politely that I’m not sure I’m interested in that] Oh, obviously the culture is different where you are from.”

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Pumpkin Cheesecake Brownies

Fall is in full swing...just look at the colors!

Enter the pumpkin. The ubiquitous symbol of fall and all things cozy and spiced. I picked up this pie pumpkin at the orchard last week. It was so cute I couldn’t resist.

I’ve never butchered a pumpkin or squash before (I’m not really a winter gourd kinda gal) but it actually wasn’t too hard. Just slice in half with a sharp knife, scoop out the seeds, put the cut side down on a baking sheet, and bake at 350 for about 45 minutes or until soft. Peel away the rind when cool and blend it up. The Roomie coached me through much of this. She’s a winter gourd kinda gal.

Most sources say to cook the puree on stove top or strain it with a cheesecloth to rid the excess moisture before baking with it.

I decided to make a recipe I’ve had bookmarked for some time: pumpkin cheesecake brownies from Eat the Love. Gorgeous, right? A great Halloween idea!

I baked the cheesecake brownies for close to 40 minutes, but probably could have even gone to 45 or 50 minutes--the brownie part was definitely more fudgey than cakey. I suppose it depends on your liking. I guess if I were to try it again, I’d slide the brownie part in the oven for 5-10 minutes before spooning on the cheesecake part, just to let it get a head start on setting and baking.

The pumpkin cheesecake part was nice, not too sweet, and had a good texture. I can also see this working with a graham cracker or snickerdoodle crust. The friends I shared with enjoyed them in their chocolately glory though! I was glad to drop them off after taking an exam in Outpatient Internal Medicine.

I’m off to Family Medicine in a small town for the next month! I won’t have a kitchen to bake in (I’ll be living in a call room at the hospital, with no bathroom or shower either....) but will likely be returning to my apartment on the weekends out of necessity. Wish me luck!

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Apple Picking and Apple Roses

This weekend, a dear friend of mine from home visited, and it was wonderful.

To date, only two of my friends from California have visited me during med school (and one was here firstly for his college reunion). Nonetheless, I’m grateful for the opportunity to recharge with people who knew me from a different lifetime. Plus, I get to take them around and show them where I’ve chosen to spend the four years of med school. 

Besides a tour of my medical school campus, I took my friend apple picking. In my opinion, it was the perfect outdoor activity on a beautiful fall day.

With bellies full of apple cider and apple donuts, and Jonafree apples in tow, we headed back to my kitchen to make these puff pasty apple roses.

Besides the laborious work of slicing apples thinly, the rest is fairly easy. You could also use a mandolin. I used store-bought puff pastry dough because I didn’t have time to make it from scratch.

All you do is roll out pastry, brush on butter, layer apple slices, sprinkle cinnamon sugar, fold, brush more butter and cinnamon sugar, and roll. The petals pretty much form themselves into a beautiful and realistic-looking rose.

I watched Chef John’s video on making apple roses, and it provided a nice visual. Some recipes call for marmalade or apricot preserves, which I don’t particularly like, so I skipped it. 

Next time I’ll butter the pan a little bit more generously. I found that the apple juices made the puff pastry stick to the pan, and some where hard to extract.

Lovely, right? Best of all, they tasted exactly like you would expect puff pastry, apples, cinnamon, and sugar to taste.

And it was made more wonderful to enjoy with a dear friend from home.