Mega Greymon

-- Kyle -- 22 -- Jasper, Alberta  -- Find Me On Grindr -- King of the passive agressive emoticons

[ruinedchildhood]

[megagreymon]

This has been me through my entire adult life… no air support as of yet.

[megagreymon]

I need picture of Satan doing stupid house hold duties like folding laundry or like vacuuming, I could die happy if it was a thing.

[collegiate-confession]

[stability]

*makes incomprehensible whale noises while downing a bag of doritos*

[avvviso]

View this post on Instagram

[dunmertitty]

I don’t know what this is but same

[thehoneybeewitch]

this is the most relatable thing I’ve seen in 2016 to date

[3melting3rainbows3]

“cindy no, FUCK”

[savemeteion]

@asecretinside @princesshollis @tydyedshoelaces

[alittlegayjellybean]

“what are you dOING YOU’RE NOT IN HIGH SCHOOL”

[errwardo-deactivated20180108]

Me @ God’s plan

[theglintoftherail]

WHY ARE YOU LONELY: A TEXT GAME - Mallory Ortberg

WHY ARE YOU LONELY: CHOOSE ONE

FAILED TO NURTURE RELATIONSHIPS BORN OUT OF CONVENIENCE ONCE CHANGING CIRCUMSTANCES REQUIRED ACTIVE PARTICIPATION FROM YOU

WATCHED NETFLIX FOR SEVEN HOURS INSTEAD OF SLEEPING BECAUSE YOU HAVE ONCE AGAIN MISTAKEN INERTIA FOR REST

CONFUSED “SELF-CARE” WITH “SELF-INDULGENCE” AGAIN; YOU ARE INCAPABLE OF EXPERIENCING GENUINE REFRESHMENT OR RESTORATION BUT YOU DO SPEND A LOT OF MONEY AT NAIL SALONS

ONCE AGAIN CONFUSED “EMPATHY” FOR “TAKING RESPONSIBILITY” AND INVITED OTHERS TO UNLOAD THEIR EMOTIONAL BURDENS ON YOU WITHOUT FIRST ENSURING RECIPROCITY, WHOOPS

ANTICIPATORILY BLAMED OTHER PEOPLE FOR NOT CALLING YOU WITHOUT ONCE ASKING YOURSELF WHY YOU CAN’T CALL THEM

ASSUMING ANY TIME SPENT TOGETHER THAT YOU HAD TO INITIATE IS SOMEHOW LESS AUTHENTIC THAN REQUESTS FOR TIME SPENT TOGETHER THAT YOU ACCEPT

BELIEVE “PERIODICALLY EXPERIENCING THE HUMAN CONDITION” MEANS SOMETHING IS FUNDAMENTALLY BROKEN WITHIN YOU

CONSTANTLY LIE ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS THEN WONDER WHY YOU FEEL LIKE NO ONE KNOWS YOU

MISTAKENLY BELIEVE THAT NEGATIVE FEELINGS MUST BE MISTAKES EITHER TO BE AVOIDED OR FIXED RATHER THAN EXPERIENCED

DESIRE TO BE FULLY UNDERSTOOD WITHOUT THE CONCOMITANT WILLINGNESS TO FULLY EXPLAIN YOURSELF

BELIEVE TRYING AT SOMETHING A LITTLE BIT SHOULD RESULT IN INSTANT PERFECTION AND FIND YOURSELF HORRIFIED AND ASHAMED OF MAKING REALISTIC PROGRESS

TRY COCONUT OIL

CONVINCED THAT HONESTLY ADMITTING YOUR PROBLEMS WILL DRIVE PEOPLE AWAY BECAUSE NO ONE LIKES COMPLAINING SO INSTEAD YOU OFFER EVERYONE A PISS-POOR SIMULACRUM OF BEING EASY-GOING

STILL JUST WAITING FOR THINGS TO HAPPEN TO YOU INSTEAD OF EXPRESSING YOUR DESIRES ALOUD

THINK YOU’RE BEING PLAYFUL BUT ACTUALLY YOU JUST GET MEAN WHEN YOU DRINK

SPEND ALL YOUR TIME SAYING THINGS LIKE “EITHER’S GOOD” OR “DOESN’T MATTER TO ME” WHEN IN FACT ONLY ONE THING IS GOOD AND IT DOES MATTER TO YOU BUT YOU THINK “NOT EXPRESSING A PREFERENCE” IS THE BEST PERSONALITY TRAIT YOU HAVE TO OFFER OTHERS

PEOPLE ACTUALLY MORE AWARE OF YOUR BARELY-CONCEALED CONTEMPT FOR THEIR CHOICES AND RELATIONSHIPS THAN YOU THINK THEY ARE

NO GOOD REASON, SORRY

Mallory Ortberg plz stop laying my psyche bare for the world to see

[strayastoner]

[ash-ofpallet]

[white-chola]

me too

[weloveshortvideos]

[kushkardashian]

i wanna drop kick him

[quietdistaste-deactivated201507]

[megagreymon]

Me: *thinks a guy is cute*

Guy: *shows the smallest amount of interest*

Me:

Me:

Me: gotta blast!

[r3333f]

“you are what you eat” i don’t remember eating a huge disappointment

[benjimansworld-deactivated20190]

@megagreymon what are you talking about most of the men you eat are huge disappointments????

[megagreymon]

Yeah @@benjimansworld but at least they don't stick around.

[kittynoct]

when ur friends are cool and talented and ur just

[benjimansworld-deactivated20190]

@terriblycontagious @megagreymon @candyandcarcrashes

[megagreymon]

@benjimansworld 100% accurate you’re so lucky to have such cool and talented friends 

[megagreymon]

Yes yes yes! I support Mop. But with so many incredible voters. Yesterday, Mop is so many incredible voters. We need to win this election. If you're excited too, we are tightening. We've built a statement, but we take the love on our campaign possible, from putting organizers on either side of this! In the difference between victory and establishment thinking to pull ahead in new voters - to pull ahead in all national and momentum is so many primaries and ask them to build momentum and caucuses in the technology that enables us to win this election. It could mean the love on either side of your support, This is a statement, but we take power back from putting organizers on the billionaire class. The truth is, it's only going to look beyond the billionaire class. Because of your help, Because of voting begins. It could mean the next three weeks, we'll be a contribution before a critical day of your community, to powering the difference between victory and contributors - and we take the love on our movement. #MopIsTheOne #MopIn2016 !!!!

[fuckyeahvintage-retro]

[theniftyfifties]

1950s advertisement for trash cans.  

[catgirlgore-blog]

me sitting with my friends

[benjimansworld-deactivated20190]

@terriblycontagious @megagreymon

[megagreymon]

@benjimansworld you're an asshole.

[muglerize]