[clayjokes]

The police pull my lifeless body from a lake but I’m wearing the funniest hat they’ve ever seen and they can’t stop laughing and keep dropping me back into the water

[owlmylove]

when ur drunk any bathroom is a save point

[owlmylove]

i have no memory of posting this

[birdsnestbegone]

OP died and respawned before they posted this

[powerfrogarchive-deactivated201]

house arrest is so funny to me. you commited crimes, stay home

[old-songs]

A D V A N C E D   G R O U N D I N G

[memecage]

WW2 SIREN

[aleksandrsokolovichromanov]

British Sirens warning of an impending Luftwaffe raid during the blitz, c. 1941

[krinkshaming-deactivated2017021]

[willcub-deactivated20180521]

I have a feeling this will become iconic in due time.  

[moonblossom]

I’ve watched this for like a dozen loops and I still crack up every time

[relatablepicturesofhomersimpson]

[philhollywood-was-here]

I always wondered about this room. Where is it?

[relatablepicturesofhomersimpson]

Whenever you notice something like that, a wizard did it.

[nutsacktorturer]

behind the garage

[relatablepicturesofhomersimpson]

And that’s the end of that mystery

[dietmountainmadewka-deactivated]

why the simpsons got a bigger house than my parents

[rainy-days-will-never-end-deact]

Homer is a nuclear engineer

[chamiryokuroi]

This post made me realize that Homer is in fact a Nuclear engineer…

[overpricedvodka]

(Twitter)

President Velveeta plagiarized his inauguration cake.

A. Cake.

This is real life.

[ororomunroedontpullout]

They took the man’s cake design like they are so low down

[taffylemonknees-deactivated2018]

EVERYONE IS MISSING THE BEST GOSH DANG PART OF THIS STORY

THEY DONATED ALL THE PROFITS TO HRC!!

[dragkingandreweldritch]

it’s cool that the bakery also gave a shoutout to the original cake designer

like they absolutely knew how shady this whole thing was and managed to handle it in the best way possible

[miracufic]

Update on #cakegate.

[thecakemonsters]

Omg this is madness

[momlonde-deactivated20130315]

do you ever see a photograph of someone really attractive from like the 1800s and you suddenly get pissed because they’ve been dead for like 200 years and you probably don’t have a chance with them

[taelusive555]

“probably”

[betterthanabortion]

“My body, my choice” only makes sense when someone else’s life isn’t at stake.

[fandomsandfeminism]

Fun fact: If my younger sister was in a car accident and desperately needed a blood transfusion to live, and I was the only person on Earth who could donate blood to save her, and even though donating blood is a relatively easy, safe, and quick procedure no one can force me to give blood. Yes, even to save the life of a fully grown person, it would be ILLEGAL to FORCE me to donate blood if I didn’t want to.

See, we have this concept called “bodily autonomy.” It’s this….cultural notion that a person’s control over their own body is above all important and must not be infringed upon. 

Like, we can’t even take LIFE SAVING organs from CORPSES unless the person whose corpse it is gave consent before their death. Even corpses get bodily autonomy. 

To tell people that they MUST sacrifice their bodily autonomy for 9 months against their will in an incredibly expensive, invasive, difficult process to save what YOU view as another human life (a debatable claim in the early stages of pregnancy when the VAST majority of abortions are performed) is desperately unethical. You can’t even ask people to sacrifice bodily autonomy to give up organs they aren’t using anymore after they have died. 

You’re asking people who can become pregnant to accept less bodily autonomy than we grant to dead bodies. 

[albinwonderland]

reblogging for commentary 

[generalmaluga]

But, assuming the mother wasn’t raped, the choice to HAVE a baby and risk sacrificing their “bodily autonomy” is a choice that the mother made. YOu don’t have to have sex with someone. Cases of rape aside, it isn’t ethical to say abortion is justified. The unborn baby has rights, too. 

[fandomsandfeminism]

First point: Bodily autonomy can be preserved, even if another life is dependent on it. See again the example about the blood donation. 

And here’s another point: When you say that “rape is the exception” you betray something FUNDAMENTALLY BROKEN about your own argument.

Because a fetus produced from sexual assault is biologically NO DIFFERENT than a fetus produced from consensual sex. No difference at all.

If one is alive, so is the other. If one is a person, so is the other. If one has a soul, then so does the other. If one is a little blessing that happened for a reason and must be protected, then so is the other. 

When you say that “Rape is the exception” what you betray is this: It isn’t about a life. This isn’t about the little soul sitting inside some person’s womb, because if it was you wouldn’t care about HOW it got there, only that it is a little life that needs protecting.

When you say “rape is the exception” what you say is this: You are treating pregnancy as a punishment. You are PUNISHING people who have had CONSENSUAL SEX but don’t want to go through a pregnancy. People who DARED to have consensual sex without the goal of procreation in mind, and this is their “consequence.” 

And that is gross. 

[thekaraokeninja]

^ THIS. This is this this THIS THIS THIS. THIS!!!!!

[updatepls-deactivated20180722]

This is probably the strongest and well worded/supported argument for abortion that I have ever read.

[dankmemeuniversity]

[under-the-arch]

[marsapartment]

Guys, from now on DC will be changing future prints of Batman: Damned #1 to censor out Batman’s d*ck, but the joke’s on them now because Batman’s d*ck is going to become a collector’s item. 

Printed copies of bat-dk are going to be selling for $35,000 a pop on ebay soon, it’s going to be absolute mayhem. Invest in Bat-d*ck if you can and invest in your future. Buy up every issue in your local comic store. Let Batman’s d*ck pay for your children’s college tuition. It’s what Batman would want.

[marsapartment]

It hasn’t even been one (1) day

[math-memes]

[myboyfriendpetebuttigieg]

I’m not your average skateboarder. I don’t “dress like a stoner.” I don’t “know how to skateboard.” I don’t “disrespect authority.” I’ve never “been on a skateboard.”

[shoujo-wizard]

[dankmemeuniversity]

[softchad]

scrubs but we can’t hear JD’s thoughts