being meguca is suffering

[megucakaname]

It was Valentines Day today and once again, Madoka didn't have a Valentine. Or a date to the dance for that matter. Maybe she could tag along with Sayaka– as friends, of course.

[megucakaname]

✉

"S-Sayaka!"

"What's not to like about you? You're strong, and p-pretty, and one of the nicest people I know! I really admire you, Sayaka!"

[academemes]

Send me a ✉ and I will tell you what I like about you.

[deadtimeline]

@megucakaname

[deadtimeline]

Sayaka nodded because she found it difficult to give a proper response. She should have known that her small hints wouldn’t work on Madoka who appeared to be oblivious to it all. She didn’t quite understand why she was so head over heels for the pinkette. Well, yeah she kinda understood. It was because Madoka was kind, gentle, sweet, and caring. She underestimates herself a lot, but that’s just how the girl’s always been. Even as children, Madoka wasn’t confident in her own abilities. Sayaka doubted that she would tell Madoka about her crush unless it got to be too much to bear. But at the same time, she couldn’t tell if she had feelings for Ibuki too.. Only time would tell.

"It’s an awfully scary ghost story then.." She feinted being scared which caused her to giggle at the expression she imagined herself making. "I hope that Kyouko isn’t giving Mami-san too hard of a time. She tends to be a little over the top sometimes." The thought of Mami, Homura, and Kyouko working together made her smile. It felt like a stunt that only Mami could pull off due to her kind personality. Sayaka was surprised at Madoka’s offer for them to protect the school together. But it sounded like a nice prospect. "Yeah! We’ll be the best duo!"

"A-Ah.. I have a confession to make.. I was lying about being sick. I just didn’t want you to see how flustered I was!" There was her face heating up again, but it didn’t feel right to continue to lie to Madoka. She found it hard to face her, so she pounced onto her bed and rolled up into the covers like a burrito. Her face was still burning, but at least it wasn’t obvious anymore.

[megucakaname]

Madoka had begun to notice that something was up with Sayaka, though she would blame it on the fever. People generally couldn't think straight when they were sick and she was sure it was the same with Sayaka. She wasn't sure of her own feelings at the moment; they had been best friends since they were children, which would explain why Madoka was so attached to the other girl. Yet she also felt a very strong connection to Homura, even though they hadn't known each other for as long as she had known Sayaka.

Madoka pressed the tips of her fingers against her smiling lips to suppress another giggle. "Mami-san is really strong, even if Kyoko was giving her a hard time I'm sure she could handle it. She could probably give her a hard time back!" Everyone getting along made the pinkette's smile widen slightly, she'd really love to be able to fight witches with all of them together. But they all had places to protect and she guessed it just wasn't meant to be yet. Maybe if they got the chance to go back they'd be able to fight all together again. Madoka curled her fingers inwards and pressed the gentle fist against her chest, "I'll do my best to help you, Sayaka!"

"O-oh!" Madoka's lips formed an O shape, her face warming considerably. She was unsure of what to say, she didn't quite understand why Sayaka would feel the need to lie over something like that. Maybe she really did have a fever! "You didn't want me to see you flustered?" She canted her head as one finger went to her slightly pink cheek. "A-are you sure you feel alright?"

[megucakaname]

[deadtimeline]

@megucakaname

[deadtimeline]

"Kyousuke wasn’t as kind as my view of the world lead me to believe. I’m happy that him and Hitomi are together! It just means that he wasn’t the one, and there’s a lot of fish in the sea. Maybe that fish is closer than you’d think."

Not that she was hinting anything by that statement. Okay, she probably was hinting a lot, but she’d deny it to the grave. It was difficult for her to express any romantic feelings after Kyousuke. She still felt like a zombie and she wasn’t sure if she could love anyone due to the state of her body. She wasn’t human and that would eat at her until her demise.  "I’ve heard a rumor that if you put pocky under your pillow, she’ll appear to you in the middle of the night. She then eats the pocky while sitting on top of you, so I wouldn’t recommend doing it." The conversation about Kyouko was a bit of comic relief from the feeling in the pit of her stomach. It wasn’t a bad feeling, it was just one that she hadn’t felt in a while. "I hope that Mami-san isn’t having a hard time protecting the town on her own.. I wish I could help her, but I can’t leave." The statement was genuine. She would help out in any way that she could just so Mami would have an easier job. Sayaka knew that Mami would never admit that her job was difficult, and she completed each fight with a smile. She had a lot of respect for her mentor from the beginning. 

"I’m sure it’s just a cold, okay?" It was a relief to see their dorm greeting them because it meant that she could hide away under the sheets in her bed. Her face was still burning, but not as much as it was earlier. "Water and rest are all I need! Thank you for all that you’ve done already."

[megucakaname]

"A-ah, is that so? I guess it's good that everything's sorted itself then..." The girl smiled at her friend; she was glad that Sayaka wasn't still upset over it, but the smile was a little awkward at the same time. Was she picking those words for a reason?

Whatever the hint, or no hint was, it seemed to fly right over the pinkette's head. Madoka was always oblivious to these sorts of things, even if you outright told her you had a crush on her she would just laugh and thank you for the compliment. She saw herself as rather plain, and no one fell in love with plain girls.

"I don't think that's a rumor– I think it's a ghost story!" She laughed at the thought of the red head eating pocky on top of her, it was definitely something Kyoko was capable of doing. "I'm sure she's fine. Maybe if Kyoko's not slacking she'd be helping her, and Homura protects it too. Just because she doesn't work alongside Mami very well doesn't mean she can't help..." She bit down on her bottom lip gently, as if deep in thought. She knew that Homura had good intentions and that she was still intent on helping the town. She needed to kill witches anyways, didn't she? "We can just protect this school now! Together."

"I don't think you're supposed to get a fever when you have a cold." Of course Madoka was concerned for her friend's wellbeing, and if she only got sicker than Madoka could only blame herself. She needed to help Sayaka feel better! "Are you sure? I-I can get you the water right away! Just rest up, okay?"

[deadtimeline]

@megucakaname

[deadtimeline]

"That’s not true.. You’re the kindest person I’ve ever met, you’re more than a fair maiden. And that’s the truth."

"That’s very true! Kyouko probably has a built in food radar that tells her if someone’s eating within 400 miles of her. I bet she’s on her way here right now." Sayaka laughed again, she knew that Kyouko wouldn’t take offense to their jokes. She did actually owe a lot to her so joking aside, Kyouko was a very important person to her. "Mami-san can be very threatening when she tries. I don’t know of anyone who wouldn’t cower from the sight of her Tiro Finale."

"I should be okay.. It’s only a bit of a fever!" Spotting Madoka’s brief smile made her grin as well. It was amazing how talking to the pinkette caused her to feel. "I’m starting to feel a little better. I think it’ll help if I lay down once we get there." The girl’s concern for her meant a lot to Sayaka, more than Madoka would understand.

[megucakaname]

"The kindest? W-what about Kyousuke?"

"So that's how she's able to find us so easily!" The smile remained on her face, lithe fingers moving to tuck pink hair behind her ear. "I'm sure Mami-san will arrive as soon as she hears about this school too, with or without us here. It really reminds me of her! The school's not as elegant as she is though." Madoka definitely admired the other girl a lot too, she had taught her everything she knew and was a good friend at the same time. She really respected and looked up to Mami.

"If you say so..." Madoka couldn't help the concern she felt for her friend, but she would do as her friend wanted her to do. Her grin made her feel a bit more at ease though. "I can get you some water too, rest will definitely help clear your fever." She continued to walk her friend along the halls, using her free hand to fish the key to their dorm out of her skirt pocket. "I-is there anything else you need, Sayaka?"

[deadtimeline]

@megucakaname

[deadtimeline]

"Thank you, Madoka. You’re still the loveliest maiden to ever walk these halls."

"She’d probably eat anything regardless of whether it tasted good or not. Just the mention of food would have her flying through the cafeteria doors." Sayaka had gotten fairly close with Kyouko over time, but their friendship started out as them being more like enemies. She knew that Kyouko didn’t want her to make rash decisions based on emotion. But it was difficult to not let feelings get in the way. "Mami-san would really like it here. But she’d need to knock some sense into some of the students first. The boys tend to make comments.." Leaning into Madoka’s body, slightly, she felt at ease. For once everything was starting to fall into place, and the odds appeared to be in her favor. "Okay.. Don’t feel bad if you walk too fast. I’m just happy that you’re here." Inside her head, she debated asking Madoka to nurse her back to health. But it wouldn’t be right to take advantage of her kindness. It was a blessing in itself to be able to have her as a roommate and that was enough for Sayaka.

[megucakaname]

She fidgeted slightly, "I-I'm sure there are fairer."

"She never wastes food, does she? Kyoko could probably hear the word 'food' from a mile away!" The pinkette definitely respected Kyoko, and she couldn't speak ill of the other girl. She came from a worse place than Madoka and yet still stayed strong; something Madoka really admired about her. "No boy could ever make a bad comment about Mami-san though! They would stop being horrible bullies to you, or to anyone, as soon as Mami-san stepped into the room!" Maybe not quite, but Madoka had faith in her senior's talents and charm. After some time Mami could probably knock some sense into those silly boys' heads.

"I-I don't want to hurt you! You can set the pace if you'd like." She couldn't help but internally beam at that last comment though, and despite her friend being ill, a small smile tugged at the corners of the girl's lips. "We're almost there, do you want me to get the nurse's aide for you?"

[deadtimeline]

@megucakaname

[deadtimeline]

"It’s a possibility! I wouldn’t say it’s a definite no."

"I bet that she did. Kyouko isn’t the type to show up on time because she’s eating." The red haired girl could certainly eat more than the average person. She laughed along with Madoka briefly despite feigning illness. "I do miss Mami-san, Kyouko, and Homura.. sorta. But it’s not the same without the whole group." Sayaka hoped that Madoka wouldn’t be too upset later on if she figured out that the bluenette was faking it. "A-Ah.. Yes. I don’t feel so good." She gripped the other girl’s arm which resulted in a feeling that was almost the equivalent of a fever. "Should we go back to our dorm..?"

[megucakaname]

"You make a very fair knight then Sayaka!"

"Maybe if she knew how good the food here was she'd come sprinting across the ocean for it!" Madoka didn't know Kyoko as well as Sayaka did, but her love for food was well known to everyone she'd met. You couldn't really miss it when she was constantly eating or talking about eating. "It's certainly a lot quieter without them all around. I think Mami-san would love it here, it's elegant– just like her." She could definitely visualise the older girl fitting right in at this school. "Tell me if we walk too fast, okay?" Madoka began to gently lead her friend along the halls, internally grateful for the fact that they weren't too far from their dorm.

[deadtimeline]

@megucakaname

[deadtimeline]

"Of course not.. I’m the knight!"

"Kyouko isn’t that smart.. If she’s not here, then we must have some qualities or smarts that she doesn’t have." She should have figured that Madoka would notice since she was so red. But she was just going to pass it off as a fever in hopes that Madoka would escort her to their room. "Ah, yeah. I think it’s a fever. I don’t feel so good. Could you walk me back to our room?" Sayaka didn’t know what to think about Madoka’s statement about Homura. They were a lot closer than her and Madoka had been despite knowing each other since they were children. "Oh, okay. I’ll take your word for it then."

[megucakaname]

"But can't you be both?"

"Maybe she just hasn't arrived yet! She probably missed the boat or something." The thought made her giggle. "It would be funny if all of us were here though..." The pinkette's eyes widened slightly, concern evident on her girlish features. "O-of course! Do you need me to lean on?" She offered her arm out to the other girl; Madoka didn't want Sayaka to fall and hit her head while making their way back! She hadn't taken much notice of her strong bond with Homura, but either way she considered both Sayaka and Homura to be important in her life.

[deadtimeline]

@megucakaname

[deadtimeline]

"Of course! I have to fulfill my duties as a hero to keep the fair maiden safe."

"You’re very smart, don’t be so hard on yourself." She turned a darker shade of red. Sayaka wasn’t sure why talking to Madoka was making her so flustered. "You seem to light up whenever you talk about her and you smile out of habit whenever her name is said. I’d have thought that you two were dating."

[megucakaname]

"But aren’t you a fair maiden too Sayaka?"

"Compared to the rest of you I’m not. I’m sure Kyoko is smarter than me, and she doesn’t even go to school!" She let out a sad sigh before taking proper notice of the other girl’s cheeks. "Sayaka? Are you alright? Your cheeks are really red, do you have a fever?" Madoka brought a small hand to her own cheeks, tilting her head against it slightly as she took her words into consideration. "R-really? Homura and I are just friends though, I-I think…"

[megucakaname]

a very cool creative creative writing assignment that deserves at least a B (B))

A weak smile tugged at the corners of the girl’s lips. ”Ah, I hope what I’ve written is okay. I’m not very good at this sort of thing.”

I really like the colour pink. It’s my favourite colour, and also one I associate with hope and magic! I don’t think I can really write about all the reasons for feeling this way towards a colour, but I think it’s a good colour to represent me. I want people to think of the colour pink and all things hopeful when I’m mentioned. I have a gem that is pink, one that I obtained for very special reasons, and it’s very important to me. I guess it’s something that kind of captures my soul! My hair is also pink, which my mother likes to tell me is something special and a part of me that I should flaunt more. My ribbons are quite cute and good at doing that. Usually I wear red ribbons to school, a colour that can go quite well with pink provided I don’t wear other colours that would clash! I also wear big pink bows in my pigtails when wearing another pink outfit I own, so I would say that the colour pink is a big part of my appearance! Pink is a very hopeful colour; pink can definitely make a difference to the world.

Hopefully that would be good enough for the teacher, though she felt a little disappointed that she couldn’t write all the reasons for feeling hope from the colour pink. Oh well.

[deadtimeline]

@megucakaname

[deadtimeline]

"I’ll keep you safe though! I promise."

"I was nervous too, especially since I can never seem to keep good grades.. Unlike you." She turned a little red at Madoka’s smile even though it wasn’t directed at her, "Madoka, I knoooow. It’s just that she’s won your heart."

[megucakaname]

"If you promise then."

"Silly Sayaka! Your grades are fine, even if you don't really work on them, mine are the ones that are bad. I-I'm not very good at anything really." The pinkette noticed the slight redness on the other girl's cheeks, though dismissed it as nothing really. "E-eh?" It was her turn to go red at her words. "H-Homura hasn't stolen my heart!"

[deadtimeline]

@megucakaname

[deadtimeline]

"Of course not.. The boys here aren’t like Kyousuke.. They’re bullies."

"I know, right! I wasn’t expecting to meet anyone that I knew from before Academia Mare. I’m so relieved that it happened to be you! I don’t think Homura would be so welcoming."

[megucakaname]

"I'll take your word for it then! They must not be very nice if they're making you say something like that..."

"I'm glad you're here though! I was a little nervous about coming here on my own, but if you're here..." A small smile settled on her lips. "Oh don't say that about her; she's n-not as bad as you make her out to be Sayaka."

[deadtimeline]

@megucakaname

"I’ll also protect you from these icky boys.. "

"And of course you’re my best friend! I’m so happy to see you again."

[megucakaname]

"I hope you're not saying that just so you can keep me to yourself..."

"I'm happy to see you too Sayaka! It's lucky we both arrived at the same school, i-isn't it?"

[megucakaname]

I was wondering if you wanted to be my roommate, Madoka?

S-Sayaka! I would love to– that is if you’re okay with it!

[deadtimeline]

Only if I get to make you my wife!

Now that Hitomi isn’t around.. I’m joking! Of course I’d be okay with it! You’re my best friend after all.

[megucakaname]

H-huh?

S-Sayaka! I should’ve known you would make these kind of jokes as soon as you saw me…

Really? You’re my best friend too Sayaka!

[megucakaname]

I was wondering if you wanted to be my roommate, Madoka?

S-Sayaka! I would love to– that is if you're okay with it!