trying to get a fuller view on life

Hi, Melissa Fuller here I live in Bristol, and am 21 as of 19th of October

[melissafulleronlife]

Hey Alex,

You're probably not gunna see this, but worth a shot. Basically I just wanted to say that I'm very content with the way you're handling everything that's been happening. I can see that you're a very logical person and trying to look at everything logically and rationally before just throwing yourself at a situation trying to fix it. But that's the thing, feelings aren't rational. Those girls feel they have been wronged :( and even though you probably never knew, like you said, it doesn't change they way they feel. Unfortunately feelings are very complex and it will probably be a long time before this whole mob mentality dies down. The people don't want your rationality and your reasoning because you're dealing with feelings here. I'd suggest an open apology to show how you FEEL about the situation rather than what you THINK of it.

In saying that, I still think that you've made some terrible decisions in your life, some really bad disgusting ones, but I do believe in the goodness of people. I also understand the variant nature of perspectives and 'truth" etc. Maybe take this whole situation as more of a lesson than a punishment. Let your conscience become more prominent in your day to day decisions rather than your need to rationalise and interpret everything. In saying that I still think the way you made those girls feel is completely inexcusable, for the moment, but I just wanted to let you know that the people just need a way to react and let out their stuff and emotions.

Your whole nonchalant attitude about losing Charlie and your other friends are also seen as very...how do I put it...it basically seems like you don't care about anyone but yourself. Which to an extent is true, since your channel and you as a person is completely based on making your own self happy, as you have said in videos. This is GREAT when you're talking about day to day stuff and expressing yourself when people you DON"T CARE ABOUT judge you, but not when it's your friends. Not when it's as big as this. When it comes to things like this, a little discipline, a little taming of your desires to make other people happy ISN'T a bad thing.

Sometimes you need to compromise who you are to get to who you want to become.

take care, and don't disappoint the very few fans you have left xx

[0nebrokegirl]

Alex Day 'Scandal' and peoples views.

So I’ve heard about this Alex day ‘Scandal’, and to be honest im one of the people you guys are totally against but I believe Alex’s side of things. I do think what he did was wrong but not all of it was. It depends on how you see things; some of you will be going crazy but at least read the whole thing before judging. Now the last seven months have been hard for both ‘sides ’(I use the term sides very loosely. I don’t think there are or should be side’s just two different groups of opinions.) the victims and the accused. But im hear to share my views and understandings on what has happened.

These girls have all posted what has happened on a master post which some people will read all of it whereas others will just scroll through it, this then would make people think that this is all true and that he is a huge rapist but some of the posts mentioned how he only flirted with the girls. This isn’t actually illegal but where people wouldn’t have read them all they would just look at the amount and go with what the majority of people say, rather than reading it and choosing for themselves.

Alex said in an interview with the BBC on the 20th of March, that nobody told him to stop or pushed him away. ‘In my sexual experiences with people, nobody ever outright told me, ‘No, stop’ or pushed me away, or I’d immediately have stopped doing whatever we were doing. ‘One of Alex’s old friends (Sorry I have forgotten the name) said on social media that if she had said stop then she knew Alex would have stopped straight away. He then thanked her in his new video ‘The Past’.

In addition to what was said in the interview with the BBC , the BBC then explained how Day mentioned how he had misinterpreted signals. ‘In a Tumblr post the day before, Day had said he had made mistakes in his relationships, including being “rude or mean to people” and being unfaithful, adding that he was “terrified” that he had misinterpreted signals from people’

                        On Alex’s new video a number of comments were made and on twitter and also Tumblr, these were just calling him an ‘arse’ or telling us not to believe him, or that his apology wasn’t / shouldn’t be accepted. A number of YouTubers also expressed their opinions on this, on twitter earlier today. (Pictures above)

This shows that other YouTuber do not agree with Alex Days explanation. Just because he may not be a part of the so called community he still has a right to post on YouTube and as well he is explaining his side on things, The fact that Hannah hasn’t watched the video but comments about how she doesn’t think he should post isn’t right. Alex has every right to express his opinions and views as if you put yourself in his position im sure you would do the same.

  Alex Day isn’t a person who cares about what people think about him. He wore a mankini on camera, because of this, yet when these allegations, Alex didn’t make a new video, he didn’t really say anything he told DFTBA to take his merchandise down, as he knew they were unsure whether to do so at that present time. The fact Alex Day; the man who didn’t care of others opinions of him went quiet and didn’t brush it off or back up his views shows, he thought they were invalid at the time or that people wouldn’t listen.

Alex isn’t the only one to be accused. Like for instance Jason or Veeoneeye as he’s known on YouTube (again I am a fan of this YouTuber) said he was sorry yet people still think of him as a part of the YouTube community, but Alex Day isn’t doesn’t make sense. Now I am still a fan but im not saying what they did wasn’t wrong.

‘I am scared of Tumblr, who are militantly liberal and intolerant of anyone else who doesn’t share their opinion.’ - Alex Day. This extract was taken from Alex’s new video ‘The Past’. It shows he generally hates to go on Tumblr as he is scared of the people on it. ‘I refuse to believe that they were lying about it for attention. Ultimately if that’s how they felt, that’s how they felt. I wish they told me instead of the internet.’— Alex Day, The Past.  Alex does feel bad and if you watched the video you can see he is sincere about it. He honestly if he could would re-write his wrongs. He does wish that they had told him how they felt and to be honest there are two sides of the story as he explains in the video, this he has told us her side and then how he saw it and he filled in the blanks she left out. The two do have a connection and do match up, and his side does make sense.  

‘Many people, including some friends of mine, have come forward to say that they were emotionally manipulated and in some cases sexually abused by certain members of the YouTube community. Some of these posts were proved to be false accounts, while others appear to be more valid.’ - CharlieMcdonald.com, March 17th 2014. This is an extract from Charlie’s blog post explaining how his friends were part of the scandal. Charlie and Alex were very close and shared a house as well. He then explains how some accounts who accused these people were fake, yet people still believe those accounts.

Overall I feel as though Alex has made a mistake, or two but he shouldn’t be judged so quickly. Yes he may not be a part of this community but he still has a right to post. He will continue whether or not you want him to, and he is right about a few people on Tumblr. I am a member of Tumblr and I can honestly say I have seen those people on it. I honestly think he is being sincere and will still continue to watch his videos. I will say though if you haven’t watched the video, I suggest you do so you can see his apology and so you can see that he was sincere.

Thank you for your time and feel free to message me about it.

[slytherintimelordd]

In defense of Alex Day

First thing’s first, if you don’t take the time to read this whole thing, at least be aware of this: I am NOT saying Alex is a saint and/or that these women are lying. Anyway. As you may or may not know, Alex has posted a new video after about 6months of disappearing off the face of the Earth. In this video he talks about the fact that he didn’t realize he was making these women feel pressured and that he was sorry for any turmoil he caused. He then proceeded to give his side of the story for a few of the women.

Whether you believe him or not is your prerogative, but we’re going to assume that he’s being honest. He has acknowledged his mistakes and has apologized, more than once, for any wrong doings. What else do you want from him? Wouldn’t you be more angry if he had just disappeared without even saying anything about the situation? He said he never meant to hurt anyone and apologized, then he gave us all some space and now he’s back apologizing again. He wants to move forward and use this traumatic experience to better himself and better learn how to interact with others and prevent this from happening again. He did not flat out rape anyone. None of the women that came forward said anything about him physically holding them down and forcing them to do things. They said they felt awkward or pressured into things. Personally, I think they probably felt pressured because of the fact that he’s somewhat of a celebrity, and probably the most famous person these women have met, not so much because of what he was actually doing or saying. One woman even flat out said that if she had said “no” she knew he would’ve stopped, but she didn’t say anything, because she didn’t feel she could. Why she didn’t feel comfortable saying “no” is unclear, but I  believe it most likely has at least something to do with the aforementioned popularity of Alex. How exactly was he supposed to know she didn’t want to be with him if she was saying yes and taking her clothes off, only to later reveal that she was unsure?

My point is, I’m not saying that Alex did nothing wrong. However I am saying that he is trying to move forward and learn from this while you all are intent of forcing him to forever live in the past and be labeled.  Side note for anyone who feels pressured by someone they’re with: If you aren’t comfortable with whatever you’re doing say something. Yes, body language and other things can give signs, but maybe not, or maybe your partner is really oblivious.  If you aren’t comfortable telling your partner no for whatever reason, you probably shouldn’t be with said partner and you certainly need to at least have a conversation with them before trying anything else.

[melissafulleronlife]

For those who keep saying OH BLAH BLAH ALEX IS MANIPULATING US....He never tried to rid himself of responsibility. But it’s not like he’s walking into it either, no sane prideful person would. He said in his video, if you bothered watching it  that he acknowledges how they felt and ultimately how they feel is the most important thing and it doesn’t matter whether he was aware of his actions or not. Initially I was wondering why anyone would bother supporting him when he was accused, but after all the things I’ve seen on his page of people trying to deny him his RIGHT of free speech, and his INNOCENCE where he has not yet been proven guilty, I’ve realised that this is a messed up world. We can’t all just make claims. I could make a claim, which would further induce a mob mentality, and it would bring more people to into making the same claim. It’s how the internet works. So stop harassing someone you know nothing about.

[dorothywasright-though]

Actual tumblr users in action. Please explain to me how you get from the quote to that idea.

[emmalikessmiles]

My thoughts on Alex Day

First of all I know this is an unpopular opinion and for that i sincerely apologize, I would love to hear why my opinion is wrong, but for now this is how I feel. There have been many allegations, that admittedly I have no way of knowing how true or untrue they are, for the purposes of this post I will assume that they are all true, saying that Alex Day is a sexual predator, who coerced girls into things they didn’t want to do with him. Okay. Let’s accept that that is true and horrible and something that should never have happened. I am not defending Alex or what he did, I’d like to make that clear, what he did was terrible. But, the fact that he made that 30 minute video today shows that at least he is trying to make it right. He doesn’t say that any of the girls who made the allegations were lying he simply states that he is trying to become a better person. While I still do not support what he did, I commend him for at least apologizing. He is trying which is really all we can ask of him at this point as he cannot go back in time. I still feel conflicted about how I feel about him as a person, but I don’t think that we should automatically push our hatred on this particular video. He has a long way to go but at least he is making the first step. Thanks for reading.

[natoristarrsmiles]

Fuck you all who refuse to hear Alex Day’s side. Seriously. How immature. Do I agree with what he did!? FUCK NO! Do I think he can change? Yes. People make mistakes. They learn and quite honestly. He handled himself well. He didn’t deny anything. He didn’t say he did nothing wrong. He acknowledges he did fucked up shit. He is allowed to tell his point of view and he deserves that much respect. He isn’t blaming his victims. He is simply trying to speak out about something that happened in HIS life! Something HE was involved in too. I’m so annoyed right now. If you disagree with how I feel. I don’t give a fuck. Block me. Unfollow me. It won’t even make a difference in how I feel.

[connectyouwithyourshadow-deacti]

On Alex Day

I’ve stayed quiet during this whole ordeal, trying my best to take in as many people’s opinions as possible but now I feel like I have to speak out.

Ever since the allegations, people have been trying to get Alex, and all of the other accused, to simply acknowledge what happened. Alex did just that, there isn’t 1 point in that video in which he describes himself as totally innocent. If anyone actually watched the video they could see that he tried his best to wholeheartedly explain his side of the story, trying to stay sensitive to the accusers.

What more do you want? Do you want him to make a video saying “I’m a rapist and I am going to kill myself” or something? Because I am baffled right now.

[arghjorants]

Stop saying "we" or "our community"

It’s really pissing me of when people say “our community” doesn’t want you. You can’t speak as a collective, if most people are on the fence. People who are consistently dismissing what he has to say, it just makes you a SJW - you’re only saying it to make yourself feel better or feel superior for ‘standing up’ for the victims. You’re making our actual community seem intolerant as fuck. 

 As I see it, you should be more sympathetic towards the victim and believe what they are saying. However, this does not mean we censor the abuser when he’s admitting to what he’s done. 

I have read the victim’s accounts, I want to hear Alex’s account on the thing as well. I’m not the only one, stop trying to speak for me. I am part of the community, and I an open to his opinion. Even if I was completely sold by the victim’s accounts, he has the right to defend himself. Whether I watch or comment (both benefit him) is my choice.

It is my choice to hear him out, don’t speak for me. If you don’t want him to make videos any more, the most you can do is ignore him. Don’t give him views, and he may eventually give up. 

It is my choice to be informed and continue watching.  It is my choice to be informed and continue watching.  It is my choice to be informed and continue watching.  It is my choice to be informed and continue watching.  DON’T SPEAK FOR ME DON’T SPEAK FOR ME DON’T SPEAK FOR ME DON’T SPEAK FOR ME DON’T SPEAK FOR ME DON’T SPEAK FOR ME DON’T SPEAK FOR ME

[catsandbooksandthings]

I’m not saying we should give him a pass on his mistakes, but the truth is he never had the INTENT to hurt anyone. He was careless but he didn’t know about the damage he was causing.

That being said, just because he didn’t intend to hurt anyone doesn’t mean he’s blameless. But I believe he’s...

[unpleasantmyles]

From facebook.

[adayinthelifeofphan]

There’s a very important difference between Alex Day and people like Nash Grier and Sam Pepper and that is that it is very evident Alex Day is remorseful and deeply disturbed that he made people feel the way they did. When Sam Pepper filmed himself pinching girl’s butts, he went on to laugh and...

[annablanchard]

The Past

To everyone who is saying bad comments on Alex Day’s new video, you should actually watch it. It will give you a new perspective on the situation. Don’t just straight away shoot it down. I know you all believe he is just manipulating us again, but I really believe he is telling the truth. He, like many of us, has made mistakes. You don’t have to agree with me, but at least watch the full video before you make accusations.

[khaleesiismygoddess]

No officer you don’t understand, I don’t feel like it was stealing so you can’t arrest me!

—the Alex Day theory

[melissafulleronlife]

He never tried to rid himself of responsibility. But it's not like he's walking into it either, no sane prideful person would. He said in his video, if you bothered watching it  that he acknowledges how they felt and ultimately how they feel is the most important thing and it doesn't matter whether he was aware of his actions or not. Initially I was wondering why anyone would bother supporting him when he was accused, but after all the things I've seen on his page of people trying to deny him his RIGHT of free speech, and his INNOCENCE where he has not yet been proven guilty, I've realised that this is a messed up world. We can't all just make claims. I could make a claim, which would further induce a mob mentality, and it would bring more people to into making the same claim. It's how the internet works. So stop harassing someone you know nothing about. 

[have-the-wish-i-wish-tonight]

I refuse to believe that they were lying about it for attention. Ultimately if thats how they felt, thats how they felt. I wish they told me instead of the internet.

Alex Day (via have-the-wish-i-wish-tonight)

[have-the-wish-i-wish-tonight]

If they say they felt pressured, then that’s how they felt

Alex Day, not accusing the girls of lying. (via have-the-wish-i-wish-tonight)

Yet another post taking things out of context. You do realise by doing this you're making your case seem less valid. 

[melissafulleronlife]

A post about Alex Day: YouTuber

Before I start this post I would like to point out that I in no way condone rape culture, manipulation or exploitation of girls, or anyone for that matter. Anyone who partakes in or support the mentioned things should be faced with legal penalties. That being said, I do have some other issues I would like to point out. 

Firstly, the issue of 'innocent until proven guilty". We live in England, a system that would rather have 10 criminals on the street than 1 innocent person stripped of their liberty in jail. Yet no one protests of this issue because as humans we inherently are sided towards compassion and forgiveness and so to some extent [as reluctant as you may be to agree with me] do support the system. Yet it seems that with a few allegations, many of them anonymous [some that are reputable] the entirety of the youtube community has bonded over mob-mentally over a guy they do not even know. It is hypocritical of all of you to allow and accept and bask in ignorance over the many unjust liberties whereby people were ACTUALLY caught in a crime scene yet they were set free and none of you are even slightly bothered. If you believe Alex Day should have his freedom of speech via YouTube revoked, then you cannot believe in the legal system. If you don't believe in the legal system, than would it not be more worth your while to CHANGE the system rather than continuously harass a man who has not been proven guilty AT ALL? 

Secondly, I think that unless this becomes a legal issue, which won't happen unless the girls with the claims take him to court, EVERYTHING YOU'RE DOING IS POINTLESS. What are you trying to achieve with the mass dislikes? The repeated 'you don't belong here' comments? The immense time you waste transcribing and then dissecting everything from someone you know NOTHING about? Why are the girls not taking this to court? Why are the anonymous complaints anonymous? What is their purpose. Harassing Alex online does nothing, if you haven't noticed he ain't going anywhere. But influencing the girls to go to court will actually change something. Not only is THAT the more humane thing to do, but you will actually make a difference to rape culture and feminism rather than just yelling uninformed biased blind attacks based on un-verified facts that you choose to believe. I'm all for making a change, but this is not the way. Sometimes feminism is about female empowerment rather than make humiliation. Actually it should ALWAYS be about female empowerment. What happens to The situation should be the girls decision, and if the girls want this whole thing to be put to rest they should go to court. Accept it, this is the way the world works. Harassing him DOES NOTHING. Just a realistic modern view. 

Thirdly, everyone who has dissected any of Alex's posts or videos are manipulating what he says to suit their own personal meanings. Jesus you could dissect every facial expression and pause of Jennifer Lawrence's interviews to make them out to look like she's an egotistical narcissist. OR you could stupid being a nit picky little bitch who enjoys basking in their ignorance and actually tries and CHANGES rape culture rather than MANIPULATING someone else's words to suit their own whilst calling the other person manipulative.

Just food for though.

If you want to know my personal opinion then yeah I think Alex did some incredibly repulsive things. Can I or anyone on the Internet verify that with more than word on a page (eg a video interview or taking to court)? No. Do I believe as a Brit in innocent until proven guilty? Yes. Therefore do I believe he has a right as a citizen of free speech on YouTube? Yes. 

Be real. Look a the facts. There is no 'truth' in the world, everything is someone's perspective. Therefore without facts and evidence the whole legal system crashes. Whilst this does pose a problem for criminals that can't seem to be proved guilty, this very requirement if evidence also poses as a good barrier against MANY false allegations. I'm no saying that the girls are lying. In reiterating the importance of EVIDENCE and KNOWING the person you're harassing online.

Move the fuck on from your narrow minded judgement and make a change. Mostly, grow the fuck up. 

Peace. xx