p a r t s : Ā o n e ā¢ t w o ā¢ t h r e e ā¢ f o u r ā¢ f i v e ā¢Ā s i xĀ
I really did mean to update this sooo much sooner, but such is life.
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s e v e n : v u l n e r a b l eĀ
Sonny stared at his desk phone for almost half an hour before he picked it up and dialed Adelinaās phone number. He promptly hung up as it began to ring and embarrassment washed over him as he realized what heād done.
Thankfully he was alone in the precinct, save for a few officers getting ready to head home after their graveyard shifts. After thoroughly judging himself, he tried Adelinaās phone again, each ring putting him more on edge. He immediately forgot the words heād rehearsed at the sound of her voice.Ā
Hi, Iām out fighting fires. Leave your name and number and Iāll get back to you soon. Adios!Ā
He loosed a sigh of relief when he realized it was just her voicemail but there was disappointment mixed in too. The second braved attempt had the same result: no answer.
The lab report sat unopened on his desk alongside a cold cup of coffee heād ordered for her. Maybe heād been presumptuous in assuming she would just show up, but he thought she would be eager to see the results for the matchbox. If not that, he thought she would want to witness the CSI investigator shyly flirt with him when sheād come to drop off the report. But an hour and then another passed and Adelina still hadnāt arrived. By lunchtime, he was sure she wasnāt going to at all and by then heād wasted his entire morning waiting around.
āWhereās your girl, Carisi?ā Fin teased as he sauntered into the precinct with Rollins in tow. They were both smirking, high off the success of securing an arrest on another open case. Though he was happy knowing there was one less criminal out on the street, he felt somewhat bitter that his case wasnāt seeing as much traction. Though that was mostly his fault. āShe get tired of dealing with your ass, already?ā
Sonny didnāt dignify Fin with a response, knowing anything he said would just goad him on. It was best to just ignore him. Besides, he didnāt think Adelina would be too pleased about being referred to as āhisā even if it was just a joke.
He knew it wasnāt warranted but he felt oddly offended by the notion that Adelina wouldnāt be interested in him. Then again, she was one of the most accomplished women he knew, right on par with Olivia. What could she possibly see in him, a low level detective in his mid-30s with little career achievements under his belt? The pitifulness of that darkened his already glum mood.
Sonny shook his head of the insecure thoughts and stood up from his chair. This was ridiculous. He was waiting pathetically by the phone like he was a hopeless teenager in high school all over again.Ā
He grabbed his coat and the folder with the lab results and walked away without saying a word. Fin and Amanda continued to laugh, not bothering to hide their amusement. They knew exactly where he was grumpily headed off to, or more specifically, who he was headed out to find.Ā
Instead of taking a car, Sonny found himself walking to the Manhattan fire station that was a relatively short distance away. He thought he might try and find the appeal of the cold weather as Adelina did, but within minutes he regretted his decision. His hands and feet were freezing and he had no idea how she did this on a daily basis. It only made his admiration for her grow.
He hurried through the front entrance to the station, basking in the rush of warmth that enveloped him. āExcuse me,ā he stopped the first person he saw. āIām looking for Lt. Guzman.ā
The older man peered at the badge visible at his hip and then back up at his face. He chuckled off handedly like he was on the inside of some joke. āYou must be the detective sheās working with. Iām Captain Reynolds.ā
āYes, sir. Iām Dominick Carisi.ā
He shook his outstretched hand and his mind swarmed with all the reasons he could be laughing at him for. Adelina must have mentioned something about that was particularly unflattering. He had a hard time narrowing down what it might be. There was a whole slew of things. If he were to ask Amanda, she could probably write out a list.
āAdelina is out back. Right through those doors, though you might have some trouble getting her attention.ā
Sonny smiled halfheartedly at the irony. He was already past that. āThank you, sir. It was nice meeting you.ā
He walked out the door and followed the sound of yelling coming from farther down the side alley. He approached the open gate to the adjoining basketball court and hung back behind a group of men gathered on the sidelines. Most of them were cheering Adelinaās name while others shouted explicitly at her brother.Ā Whatever they were playing, they were on opposing teams.
She ran into Sonnyās line of sight, kicking a soccer ball across the court towards the makeshift goal of orange cones.Ā She dodged to the right and side-stepped her brother, but he was right on her heels, swiftly taking the ball out from under her feet. They went back and forth like this, hardly passing the ball to anyone else.
āHey, youāre that detective, right? Iām Jack. We met at the apartment fire.ā
āRight,ā Sonny nodded.Ā āI remember.ā
āYou here to see Addie?ā
Sonny gestured to the folder tucked under his arm and Jack peered over at the ongoing game.Ā āLooks like theyāre almost finished up.ā
āHow can you tell?ā
Just then Emiliano dodged a goal by throwing his entire body in front of his sister. She toppled back, landing on her backside with a yelp. No one helped her up and as Sonny took a step forward, Jack placed a hand on his chest to stop him.Ā In the next second, Adelina jumped up to her feet and began cursing in Spanish or at least thatās what it sounded like. He knew enough of the language to recognize a few of the profanities.
āYup,ā Jack chuckled.Ā āSomeone will break it up when she starts throwing fists.ā
āAre they always like this?ā
He pretended to think about it.Ā āPretty much.ā
Sonny cracked a smile and watched in amusement as the referee for the game was called over to decide who was in the wrong. Clearly it was Emiliano, but he still acted surprised when he was penalized with the winning point going to his sisterās team. It was her turn to grin as she rubbed her victory in his face. He didnāt know how heād ever mistaken them for a couple.
āYou know, all these guys here would gladly kick your ass if something were to happen to her,ā Jack said as pleasantly as if heād just delivered a compliment. āThat is if we got to you before Emiliano.ā
Sonny bristled, his smile dropping into a frown at the abrupt threat. It was probably coming from a good place, but he still didnāt appreciate it. āSheād probably tell you sheās capable of taking care of herself.ā
Jack shrugged, still watching Adelina celebrate the small win with her teammates. āI donāt doubt it, but I care about her enough that itās still worth passing along.ā
āYou two areā¦close?ā Sonny knew he shouldnāt ask. It was inappropriate and a complete invasion of Adelinaāsļæ¼ privacy, but in his defense, if anyone had crossed boundaries first it was him.
Jack just smiled in response. It wasnāt a yes, but it also wasnāt a no.
Too busy glaring at the nuisance beside him, Sonny missed the look of surprise on Adelinaās face when she saw the two of them standing together. She grabbed a towel from the bench and wiped her sweaty face, trying to make herself as presentable as possible. āSonny! I didnāt know you were coming.ā
Sonny smiled as she jogged over, his apprehension washing away with one look at her. āSorry, I tried calling.ā
āShoot. I left my phone inside while we played.ā
āI caught the end of the game. Youāre good, really good.ā
āThanks,ā she replied, somewhat breathlessly.
Jack shifted on his feet as a silence blanketed over them, which only he seemed to find uncomfortable. It suddenly felt as if he were the guest and not the detective. āSonny? I thought your name was Dominick?ā
Adelina looped her arm with Sonnyās and began pulling him towards the back door.Ā āItās a nickname strictly reserved for friends,ā she sniped playfully and stuck her tongue out at him.
āSo, what brings you to House 16?ā She asked when they walked into a small office beside the captainsā.
āI got the report from the matchbox back. I thought you might want to take a look at it together.ā
āAh,ā she pulled away and the smile on her face fell.Ā āIām sorry. I must stink. Give me a few minutes to shower will you?ā
Before he could respond sheād gathered her things from her desk and scurried out of the room, closing the door behind her. He was positive now, something was definitely bothering her and he hated to think it was something heād done. Jackās threat echoed irksomely in the back of his mind.
Sonny took off his coat and hung it on the rack. The room was warm, but he was still recovering from his time in the cold. He rubbed his hands up and down his arms as he looked around, peering at the frames hung up on her walls. One was of her academy graduation ceremony and in it she was dressed sharply in uniform. The second one was a group photo of her coworkers all making silly faces as they crowded close together to fit in the shot.
Beside these sheād framed her promotion certifications and awards.Ā The most recent was an Award of Excellence in recognition of her leadership and service. Surely just the first of many to come in her career.
The rest of the framed pictures were of her family. The farthest back looked like a school photo when she was 5 or 6. Her hair was done up in an intricate braid with a big blue bow and she was missing her two front teeth. Emiliano has his arm slung around her neck and their mother was kissing his cheek. The rest of the pictures were similar, the three of them hugging each other close throughout the years. Adelinaās father, who sheād yet to mention, was not present in any of them.
The one that caught his attention the most was a frame painted light blue with white clouds. It was old by the looks of it, the paint chipping off the edges. She looked much younger in the pictures, probably 15, and in her arms she cradled a baby wrapped in a knitted blue blanket. In the corner, a date and initials were marked with sharpie.
D.G 11/12/06
āThatās Danny.ā
Sonny flinched as Adelina walked up behind him, running a towel through her wet hair. He hadnāt heard her come in.Ā
āCute kid,ā he managed to say and pointed to another picture, where the baby was several years older. She was smiling into the camera, pressing her cheek against the little boyās chocolate covered face. At least he hoped it was chocolate. āHe looks like you.ā
They had the same nose, high cheekbones, and hair color. The only notable differ was his eyes were a lighter shade of brown almost green. Adelina smiled fondly, remembering those days from so long ago. As she did, she noted Sonnyās stunned expression and knew exactly what he must be thinking.Ā
āYeah, he is pretty cute. He definitely gets that from me and not Emiliano.ā
Sonny made a face of confusion and borderline disgust.Ā āYour brother? But arenāt you his mo-ā
Adelina turned a frame on her desk. It was from Dannyās 12th birthday a few months ago when Emiliano had taken him to a Yankeeās game. In this one, she had to admit they looked an awful lot alike. āHis aunt? Yes.āĀ
āItās fine. Iām used to it. Years of babysitting put me on the receiving end of all kinds of judgement. People donāt usually look kindly on teen mothers. Regardless, I did practically raise the kid.ā
āHis mom wasnāt around?ā
Adelina slumped into her chair and felt a twelve-year-old bitterness rise up.Ā āShe skipped out the day she was discharged from the hospital. Took one look at him and decided he wasnāt worth giving up her life for.ā
Sonny sat down across from her and for once, he could relate.Ā āThat must have been difficult. My sister had a baby when she was young and the father didnāt stick around either.ā
āYeah, well, screw absent parents. My nephew brought life into our lives. He didnāt take anything away.ā
āHeās really lucky to have an aunt like you.ā
āItās the opposite actually. Weāre all lucky to have him.ā She laughed,Ā āanyway, you came here for a reason. Not to talk about my family.ā
Sonny placed the folder on her desk and she leaned away. He couldnāt read the emotion on her face, it was a cross between sadness and apprehension.Ā āWhatās wrong, Adelina? Youāve been acting weird since we got the surveillance footage.ā
āItās nothing.ā She tried to open the folder, but he moved it out of reach so that she had no choice but to look at him.
āLook, if thereās something I need to know about, now is the time to tell me. Peopleās lives are on the line and need to know youāre putting in your all.ā
Adelina nodded her head and she was flooded with shame.Ā āYouāre right, Iām sorry. Iām not usually like this. Itās just this case isā¦ personal.ā
His eyes widened, āYou think you know who did it?ā
āNo, no. Itās not that.ā She sighed, wishing Emiliano were here so she wouldnāt feel so small for voicing these fears. She didnāt expect Sonny to understand. He would never experience these concerns for himself. āImmigrants and people of color, people like me, weāre all looked at the same way. Like being bad is inherent to us. If the man whoās hurting these women is Latinx or even just a shade too tan, weāre all vilified with him.ā
Heat rushed into Adelinaās cheeks and she couldnāt look up to meet his gaze.Ā āI know it sounds horrible and so selfish, because this asshole deserves to rot in a cell for what heās done, but it hurts knowing that his crimes will reflect on us all. I thought by now, Danny wouldnāt live in a world where heās told to go back to his country because he looks a certain way, but it hasnāt changed at all. Sometimes it feels like itās worse.ā
Sonny listened and was at a loss for what to say. It wasnāt fair that she was made to feel unworthy when she had every right to be hereāwhen she was just as American as anyone else. It wasnāt right that her community was targeted and marginalized by ignorant politicians and their followers because she didnāt start her life in the country. They were the ones who were unworthy, the bigots who spent their lives spewing hate and deciding who had more of a claim to their citizenship than others.
āI canāt tell you that wonāt happen with this case, Adelina. All I can promise is that Iām going to try my very hardest to make this city safer for all of us, including people like you and Danny. I know youāll do the same because you also took that oath to protect and serve.ā He motioned behind him to the wall of awards, āAs far as Iām concerned, youāve been doing a hell of a job already.ā
A small smile touched curved her lips. She knew what the weight of a promise meant to him and trusted every word he said. āThanks Sonny. Iām glad I was able to talk to you about this.ā
āWeāre partners. Thatās what Iām here for.ā
She blew out a heavy breath before she could blush again and looked at the folder. It was now or never. Sonny got up and stood beside her to look at the lab results, one hand on her desk and the other on the back of her chair. She could hardly comprehend what it said with him hovering so close to her. She could smell his cologne. It was something rich and warm like coffee and cinnamon, and she subconsciously leaned in closer.
āNothinā,ā Sonny muttered and sat at the edge of her desk. āNo matches. Back to square one.ā
Adelina didnāt let her disappointment brew for long. āWell, maybe not. Iāve been thinking about how he bought the matches right across the street from the apartment. This guy is smart, he knows how to clean up his tracks. It seems unlikely that heād forget something like that and risk being caught on camera unlessā¦ā
āUnless what?ā
āUnless thatās what he wanted.ā
Sonnyās expression hardened as he thought about it. āYou think he could be messinā with us?ā
āLike cat and mouse.ā
It wouldnāt be the first time. Sometimes the perpetrators liked to leave something behindāa signature to claim their crime. I was here. They enjoyed the chase that ensued, for some it was even more pleasurable than commiting the act.
āAlright, Iāll bite. Get your coat, weāre leaving.ā
āWhere are we going?ā While she put on her beanie and gloves, he wrapped her scarf around her neck and expertly tied it into a knot.
āIf youāre right, which I have a good feeling you are, then he went to places around the other crimes scenes too. Now we just have to canvas them all.ā
They walked quickly out into the bitter cold, and when he didnāt stop at one of the vehicles parked on the curb she gave him an incredulous look. āYou walked here?ā
āThought Iād give it a try.ā
Adelina laughed and that warm feeling from before blossomed in her chest again, āand what did you think, detective?ā
āWell,ā he mused, āI canāt feel my toes.ā
t a g l i s t : @ld-1204ā @i-love-you-green @firefliesindaylight @why-cant-i-hold-all-my-husbandsĀ
i always recommend wuthering heights to people because itās such a unique book in which none of the characters are even remotely likable and yetā¦.you really canāt wait to see where their bullshit is going to take them next. running away from home? cool. obsessing about revenge for the rest of your life? hey everyone needs a hobby. forcing your kid and the neighbors kid to get married? sounds like a plan. digging up your old lovers grave? why the fuck not at this point. youāre both pissed off yet fascinated. you will be miserable but love every second of it
in case anyone is looking through the notes trying to find the original artist itās will mcphail !! feel free to check out his site but also here are some other things he made too !!
After 16 hours on call, Adelina felt as though she was about to drop. She barely made it up the stairs to the sleeping quarters before she practically collapsed. She loved her job, truly she did, but most days it left her completely exhausted. It was the reason she didnāt have a social life, or at least that was what she told herself.
In reality, she liked the company of her coworkers more than any of the acquaintances sheād had over the years. Adelina found that she got bored in her relationships and it was all too easy to let them go. It was difficult for people to keep her entertained when she had one of the most exhilarating careers one could have. While it hindered her abilities to form real connections, it didnāt bother her all that much. She had everything she needed in this firehouse.
This is a Sonny Carisi fic that Iāve had in my head for a while. It will have several parts, but Iām not sure how many yet. Iāll just see where it goes. Hope you enjoy :)
word count: 1,487
trigger warnings: I may have dropped the f-bomb once or twice
o n e : i n t r o d u c t i o n s
āItās burninā real hot, Lieu.ā Emiliano let out a low whistle, eyes alight from the red-orange flames blazing in front of them. Even in the brisk, October night he was breaking a sweat from the uncomfortable heat.
Lieutenant Adelina Guzman wiped away a sheen layer of moisture from her brow.Ā āToo hot,ā she muttered and shouted into her radio for more water to be diverted to the lower level. She watched as the men controlling the hoses followed the order and the flames began to recede.
When theyād received a call of a structural fire in Manhattan, theyād mentally prepared for the worst but expected something small. More often than not it was a kitchen fire of a cooked meal gone wrong or a candle placed too close to the curtains. A call they had all responded to hundreds of times before.
Three blocks away, theyād seen the flames billowing above the surrounding buildings, and knew it would be a long night. From the passenger seat, Adelina had placed a hand on Emilianoās shoulder while he drove. Sheād closed her eyes and said a little prayer. They would do what they did best and they would all get to go home.
Two hours later, Emiliano watched Adelina closely, trying to make sense of her thoughts from her expression. For as long as heād known her, he could always tell what she was thinking but not when it came to the job. He was not embarrassed to admit it was because she was smarter than him. āWhat are you thinking?ā he finally gave in and asked.
the social norm of āits your ethical responsibility to be constantly aware of, and angry about, every bad thing happening in the world at all times, even if you canāt possibly do anything about itā is possibly the best way I can imagine to create burnout and cynicism and depression in a population, so good job guys
Everyoneās getting so excited over Peter Kavinsky, but they forget the original Soft Jockā¢, Scott āMy mom buys all the groceriesā McCall.Ā ICONIC.
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