everybody acts like dazai joining the ada with no resume or recorded history is the outlier among ada employees but their main hiring requirement is basically a glorified vibe check. the founding detective was kicked out of the police academy. their second employee was a war criminal. they hire orphanage rejects with bounties who have no formal education. a random farm kid became a detective. a child assassin. whatever the hell tanizaki has going on. honestly i'm pretty sure kunikida is the only ada employee who knows what a resume even is.
What’s this “will?” His little proclivity is WELL developed
(Warning there’s nasty nasty kagune stuff under the cut)
Kaneki certainly noticed how sensitive his kakuhou is. Getting dressed or showering or even leaning back on some things can rub it in a way that feels a little too good. Eventually Koma saw him jolt when he leaned it against the counter and joked “hey at least buy the counter a drink first,” to be met with confusion and having to explain that the kakuhou is sensitive in that way. Needless to say Kaneki was humiliated at being told that and made a point to let nothing near it for awhile. Well. At least at work, because now that he knows it can be sensitive he went to try it out the next time he got himself off, and will definitely be asking Hide to touch it more
With such a pleasurable new organ he’s been touching a bit more than he’d ever admit, he’s also found himself very aware of his kagune. They’re so powerful, so strong, so… long and dexterous. He tried not to think about that because there’s a limit to how much weird shit he can stay horny for, but unfortunately this is something he can stay horny for
He’s at Itori’s bar like he often is these days and of course, she and her partners are talking about wildly inappropriate shit. Particularly, Uta is mad that tentacle porn exists and ghouls aren’t seeing any money for it. Kaneki was understandably confused, and Uta happily went in depth to disgust him about how that entire genre definitely sprung up from a human who fucked a rinkaku ghoul and is now making a mainstream ghoul kink into a mainstream human kink by replacing rinkaku with tentacles. Uta went on about how unrealistic it all is and that real kagune sex involves way more prep and lube and how whether or not penetration is even an option depends on the kagune shape and texture as if that’s what Ken wants to hear. Kaneki has to excuse himself and go the fuck home to deal with this information
And by “deal with this information” I mean “attempt to tentacle himself.” Unfortunately he was woefully unprepared and didn’t prep well, resulting in him hurting himself right as he started and never trying it again. Though just because that type of approach didn’t work doesn’t mean he doesn’t still use them in place of his hands sometimes
Now, it’s one thing for Kaneki to have a kagune kink. Most ghouls do, it’s normal. But it’s a whole other thing for Hide to have one. And have one he does. The way they move like liquid, the way they harden into scales when Ken is feeling good, the way they wrap around his limbs when- yeah this man is down bad. Monsterfucker supreme
At some point these two both have to admit aloud that kagune stuff is hot. With that now agreed upon, they can do a whole lot more. Everything from wrapping them around bed frames and Hide for leverage to tying them up, these boys aren’t as innocent as they seem
When Hide gets the quinx surgery that’s a whole other layer to things. Kaneki is turned on enough by his own kagune, but now his boyfriend has a soft orange bikaku and he knows how to use it just right
On this 4th of july i would like to boost my tribe’s bee farm!! https://iowaybeefarm.com/ is their website! They sell honey, beeswax products, giant jars of bee pollen, lip balms and lotions!
pretty much everything is really cheap (much cheaper than it should be) and you can get a whole gift basket for 35 bucks!
[ID: a still from spongebob of mr. krabs dragging spongebob through the front of krusty krab toward the kitchen as spongebob is screaming and clawing at the floor. text in all caps on the top and bottom reads: you hit the wrong x buddy / you're going to the app store /end ID]
