🥀

therapy diary for meh for the girls and to the girls💋

[memind]

I got prescribed adderall and im so excited for that appetite suppression 😍😍😍

Also functioning like a normal person would be nice

[memind]

I was seducing my gamer boy/discord kitten<3 it worked🥰

[memind]

So a little update

I got worse

I thought about $uicide

I tried it, failed went to a mental hospital and was given more meds cause i refused to stay there hmmm what else im bombing med school i got a D+ in msk block but i guess that was inevitable cause i did try 😵 during exams

And as for my eating disorder i relapsed a bit you know mainly ideas and failed commitment (such as failure in every aspect lol) but then i got back to counting cals and my new meds suppressed my appetite a bit, i was given an antipsychotic for $uicidal tendencies but i didn’t take it i was traumatised from olanzapine lol.

Lastly I used my medicine and pharmacology expertise to buy drugs that makes you lose weight yk like metformin and orlistat and yeah i did lose weight and next week my subscription for healthy food begins and their main dish has less than 400 cals😲 it was for Ramadan cause it always triggers me but i guess all these with fasting combined i will lose a good amount

[memind]

Why stupid brain make stupid scenarios and feel intense feelings about it like it’s actually happening and crying about it

[memind]

TW‼️‼️

I Ate 😼

[memind]

Got called skinny!! In a shocked way today

Good day good day

[memind]

I’m in my 20’s and still wanting to be pretty and skinny when will i ever move on

[memind]

And when someone calls me pretty im like no no this lighting, angle and makeup it’s not true so i don’t believe them

[memind]

I had this idea where i thought if i was skinny i would look pretty but it got proven wrong so many times i know im obsessed with beauty but i cannot fake it for god’s sake i tried everything i think i need a surgical intervention

Still gonna ⭐️ve myself tho

[memind]

I hate group pictures it just shows how huge i am i literally had a mental breakdown yesterday

[memind]

Im so fat i will end it istg

[memind]

I might just cancel and stay in bed googling how much a breast reduction surgery cost

[memind]

People wonder why i have an eating disorder despite having “the perfect body” in their mind but they never experienced having boobs so large and wearing size s it’s like im being suffocated

[memind]

After getting the confirmation that i have bpd can i be welcomed into the fandom🫦 this is me 23 and suicidal with a mix of mental illnesses like bpd, ed ana, mdd and anxiety yk the usual haha

[memind]

Forgot to tell you guys that i got diagnosed with ? Personality disorder and the next session we found the answer borderline personality disorder 😻😻😻

I kinda knew but i don’t wanna think about it

[memind]

I might be getting ketamine therapy you guys💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕

[memind]

You guys i got a new diagnosis instead 😻😻😻 bpd

[memind]

I might be getting ketamine therapy you guys💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕