Queer secondary adolescence and Stolas
(I keep forgetting to put this up here)
Ok, so Stolas being teen dad is one of the reasons I get annoyed when people say he's too horny with Blitz. Or that his relationship is too dramatic and teenager-y.
He's a queer guy who never got to be a teenager, didn't get to have a first boyfriend, or explore who he was. Or do any of the normal stuff most straight teenagers get to do.
His family stuffed him in the closet, forced him to have child, and gave him an abusive wife as jailer.
(He around 36, with a 17 year old daughter. 36โ17=19 when Octavia was born. Likely married at 18).
He's got some chatting up to do.
Up till now his whole life's been about Via, and mitigating Stella's abuse to hid it from Via.
That's left him barely hanging on, taking an increasing amount of antidepressants; and singing lullabies about not being sure he'll make it till Via's grown up.... ๐
There's this thing called second adolescence that alot of queer people experience, when they come out later in life.
It happens when they're weren't allowed to do normal teenage things at the right age. So things like having crushes, go on first dates, have extremely anxious dramatic relationships. As well just be a normal horny teenager.
Stolas got to do none of that. So he's doing it now.
He's also pretty obviously an autistic guy (separate post), who didn't get well socialized as a child.
Blitz appears to have been his first and only really friend.
Stolas is not great at social cues. (He's so happy to be able to help with his special interest, but does realise his tone is upsetting Ozzie).
Even with Via he struggles to understand her. She needs to tell her dad flat out what she needs.
When she tries to be subtle, and snark he assumes it's just her being a moody teen. And that she'll enjoy loo loo land when she loosen up a bit.
Because of this lack Stolas mostly fills in gaps in his social experience with masking.
Such copying Gabriel hairstyle from helluva novella to get ready for his first ever date.
Following Blitz's lead of what to do in an uncomfortable situation.
And trying to match the energy of how Blitz first came on to him.
(He's definitely getting better at it from Blitz reaction).
There's also an idea in CBT called reparenting your inner child. Which about giving yourself some the support, and experiences you missed out on because of abuse.
Stolas needs to go through his secondary adolescence as part of his recovery from his abuse.
So let Stolas be a little horny weirdo. ๐
PS this one will brake you heart. Stolas is standing fully in both these pictures.
You can see how much he's grown by her light switch.
Kid hasn't even reached his full adult height yet when he had to have a kid.
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