Call Me Ishmael

Mike Wheeler apologist first, human being second

[the-golden-ghost]

The problem with Murdle is that it's impossible to recommend to literally anyone on the face of the earth due to What It Is but the other problem with it is that it's funny as hell

[almightytuba]

hi murdlers this is all i have to offer at the molement

[yufugurenyan]

I know they’re not like this, but I couldn’t help drawing them😳

[calevine]

Just a snowy renga for your mental health.

cr. cale red

[mercury50]

You can SEE how comfortable Langa is and how cold Reki is

[occhiofino]

ishmael: ok so I ended up sharing a bed with queequeg after all

fujo landlord: how was it

[caffeiiine]

ISHMAELLLL uaaaaaghhhh. thing i didn’t pick up from my first read is literally just How passively suicidal Ishmael is, and how he sees death in so many things. also special shoutout to when he and Queequeg are headed to the Try Pots and he’s on this little rumination paragraph about how the sign resembles gallows and he resolves that they’re for he and Queequeg both. i don’t think your husband would like that too much dude. he agreed to die with you Should It Come Down To It. not on your terms. tis until death only naturally do you part. no gallows for Ishmael

also double shoutout to the chowder chapter that comes right after. mrs hussey is literally just so funny i love her so bad. also ishmael asking queequeg to confirm whether or not he (ishmael) got high off the?? the chowder??? fascinating guy

[snoopy-271]

Simon GET OUT OF THE WATER.

[clonehub]

I hate you epitome of innocence being represented with blonde hair I hate you lightness representing goodness I hate you "angelic features" automatically being read as blonde hair and blue eyed with pale skin I hate you whiteness as the default for morality I HATE YOU I HATE YOU

[andrewstanton]

genuinely how i start moving when people say that ralph was supposed to be blond. WHY DO YOU THINK, IN THIS DEEPLY ALLEGORICAL BOOK, THAT HE WAS BLOND??

in 2026 ralph can be anybody

[polari]

i can’t reblog the post asking people to name their white whale book for 2026 in the tags because i see the words “white whale book” and i black out and go crazy and it requires a strong moral principle to prevent me from deliberately stepping into the street and methodically knocking people’s hats off

[everyonehtswill]

Thinking about how Mike jumped where they found Will's fake body.

[ninononono]

Start living your stories - be brave! Better late than never. Happy Birthday Mike Wheeler

[punished-venom-solitair-e]

my favorite phenomenon on tiktok is when all the comments will line up and start doing the same bit

[purusims]

☀️🌊🍦🧸⛱️

[theterribletenno]

A 15-year-old boy is about to base his entire personality on the last movie you watched for the next 10 years. HOW BAD IS IT?

He is going to get himself killed. Badly.

He is going to (try to) kill himself

The most obnoxious person in the world has just been born

FURRY (derogatory)

FURRY (normal)

Not much has changed? But now he's stuck like this for 10 years? Yikes.

It's cringe but it could have been a lot worse

At least he'll have fun at Comic Con

If anything this is a slight improvement.

He's not a boy anymore. He's a man now.

She's not a boy anymore. She's a girl now.

FINALLY, a son I can be proud of!

Voting ended onMay 11

[neornithes]

Strong contender for the best chapter in Moby Dick is the one where they meet another ship whose captain lost a limb to the white whale (an arm instead of a leg) and that guy is Completely Normal about it. Thinks it’s ridiculous to get vengeance against a dumb animal. Hasn’t tried to chase Moby Dick since, because why the fuck would he? The book cannot make more clear that Ahab is choosing to be Like This

[heron-knight]

Vampire girl explaining that vampires don’t necessarily have to kill someone to drink their blood, but she did kind of kill a lot of people back when she was all depressed pre-transition: “when I was an egg I ate four dozen lads”

[donutage]

My grand entry into the field of Moby Dick shitposting.