It was a ShitFest by Crys Cardona
Sometimes there are stories that you can not make up that actually happened. Sometimes people give you that look like you are a complete liar, when you tell an outrageous story. But the story I am about to tell you did happen and it is extremely gross.
I used to work at a restaurant in Hollywood, California on Hollywood Boulevard. It was probably the worst and best job I ever had; reason being I like my coworkers and hated my managers. There was always random/ interesting moments with homeless individuals in Hollywood. I will say working in Hollywood has made me despise tourist, hipsters, and drunk individuals. With that said, I’m going to tell you my story of when Hollywood Boulevard was literally shitted on.
It was friday night during the summer. I was working the restaurants merchandise section, along with a couple of other coworkers. I was helping one of my coworker restock the merchandise, close by the front window that has a clear view of the sidewalk and street. There is literally a sea of people during the summer, where you can’t see the sidewalk. For some odd reason we got distracted by something falling off from the roof. Sometimes people would throw items off the 5th floor because kids/ adults thought it was funny. This was different because we said “oh someone dropped their Starbucks cup from one of the levels.”
All of a sudden this pungent nasty smell overwhelmed the Boulevard. We went outside and literally someone took a shit in Venti Starbucks cup and threw it off one of the floors onto Hollywood and Highland and it spread all over the walk of fame. (Note that people are walking on the shit, and in the shit) That wasn’t the worst part. We see one guy walking and all of a sudden in a cartoon slow motion, see him off the floor -legs up and back in the air and he literally fell in the shit. That definitely ruined his night on Hollywood Boulevard. My Co-worker felt bad and gave him a shirt for free from our inventory; because you literally do not want to tell that embarrassing story to someone.
Our restaurant called the building management about the fecal situation. So management sent this poor little worker from the Hollywood and Highland complex to come and clean the mess. Needless to say, the story spread through the restaurant the next day and people were talking about how someone took a shit in the Starbucks Venti cup and threw it off the roof.
You would think that was the end of my story its not. It’s now Saturday night on Hollywood Boulevard. It is literally a show on Saturday nights. Party buses pull up around 10 o’clock to the club, that’s in the same complex as the restaurant, or bars on strip. Groups of girl with outfits that make a person wonder if people own mirrors, and guys who literally bathe themselves in cologne, wear Polo shirts and sunglasses at night.
Back to the story before I go on a rant. So this party bus pulls up and this group comes out of the bus and goes to the club. Last call comes around 1:30 a.m. in Los Angeles so that same group comes out from the club.
My Coworkers and I are locking up the front doors. We see this girl in a black shirt and white skirt stumbling, falling, and yelling. We obviously joke “she looks like she had fun.” We see her standing next to a guy which we assumed was her boyfriend. One of the host yells out “OMG I think she is shitting her self!” The hosts, servers, busers, and retail group all head toward the glass front doors.
Needless to say her skit was no longer white. Not only did this poor girl shit herself, she also shitted on her boyfriend’s pants. Since the group was on Hollywood Boulevard, tourist were taking video and pictures of the whole comical event for the memories to share when they returned from their trip. The party group were starting to fight the onlookers. As passerbyers were yelling remarks to the group the party bus driver was telling the group that their friend was not allowed on the bus.
The group decided to call a taxi and not inform the taxi driver of the situation. As they are helping this poor girl with shit running down her leg in to the taxi, shit was smearing onto her friends. Her friends had poop on their hands and clothes. Which made some of my co-workers start to gag. We literally had front row to this disaster and could not look away. Mind you, at no point did we offer our assistance. By the end of it the taxi takes the poor girl, L.A.P.D gave a ticket to one of the party members for hitting an on-looker. The sad part about this story is the same worker from the night before had to clean up the mess again.
It was literally a shitty weekend. This was definetly something I couldn’t make up.
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