me when get

[energyprison]

every political scandal has to be called ____gate now because 54 years ago a guy named blowjob told reporters there were bugs in the democrat offices

[thisshitaintnothintomeman]

im moving arbitrarily. im just doing shit

[mewhenget]

This shit is irrelevant to me, man

[ishowdespair-deactivated2026012]

when the curse is lifted

[kirikomamura]

despite everything the discover feed bsky libs are really, really funny sometimes

[mrsandman42069]

this shit ain't nothin' to me man, I gave blowjobs to millions of us voters 3 FUCKING TIMES

[louisegluckpdf]

imagine getting first chair in the band in whiplash and being like fuckkk now i have to sit near the drummer who’s always sweating and spitting and crying and bleeding everywhere

[3000s]

nothing bottom jeans and boots with the nothing

[3000s]

the whole club was gone

[dragongirlsnout]

When you drink a minuscule amount of alcohol and still get absolutely wasted: Night of the Hog

When you drink a ton and yet feel nothing out of the ordinary: Night of the Wolf

[dragongirlsnout]

I reference this literally every time I'm at a bar because I'm somewhat convinced I saw it in a tumblr post somewhere but I have been informed that this is not in fact a known tumblr post in circulation and I was shown a prophetic vision at some point leading me to form the dichotomy from first principals

[akashicrecord]

Affirmations:

- I do not feel well and I am probably going to die

- I am sick and dying

- Girl it is Thursday

[thisshitaintnothintomeman]

call my dick the tower of babel the way god wont let me erect it

[escuerzoresucitado]

[romanceyourdemons]

when you’re mean to me this is literally who you’re being mean to *image of me perched atop a throne of human skulls on a cliff above the ocean, howling wind and shrieking seagulls, and the dream goes on forever, one single static frame*

[dear-girl-skeleton]

im listening to some above ground normal shit youve probably heard of

[reallyreallyreallytrying]

my buddy says the craziest stuff when i make him plead for his life

[amazoogle]

i was not created in a lab but i will be destroyed in one

[im-monkeying-around]

On the topic of brunch making you queer:

Shorty wanted me to have brunch with her after a long night of feeding the demons. Next thing I knew, I was getting a manicure and stopping by Ulta to get the palest foundation they fucking had. I traded in my rolly for extensions and diamond studded hoops. I am finally happy with the person I've been avoiding all along.

[demonschnauzer]

[dogpuppy]

[meat-puppet]

Im moving different

this shit aint nothing to me man